Big Brother Visits Corporate America (624 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.71 on 17 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Julie (View user info) at 2004-11-22 15:21:20 EST
I missed my true calling as a torch wielding, rebel rousing villager. It's a damn shame, too. We don't have enough peasant revolters in corporate America.
Today was a fan-spankin-tastic day at work. My company's wonderful "Employee Committee" has been planning a smashing event to celebrate Thanksgiving. You think I would have learned a lesson from the Indians about so-called "thanksgiving" events. Any celebration thrown by "those in power" is sure to fuck over the little man.
However, it was a party, and free food is free food. Needless to say, my hopes were high in anticipation of the event, when suddenly, an email made its way into my mailbox that forever crushed whatever company spirit I had.
"This is a reminder that hourly employees need to "clock" out during their Thanksgiving lunch event."
That's it. That's all it said.
WHAT? "Hourly" employees need to clock out during the "lunch" event? What happened to the Thanksgiving extravaganza?
Now, the "hourly" employees need clock out and make up the extra time? For a company sponsored event? I feel like I am living in 1984. Beware, all you "have nots" Big Brother is watching.
In response to this email, I couldn't keep my mouth shut. I hate lame attempts by large corporations to suck the life out of its employees in an attempt to make them drones almost as much as I hate working in a box. So I responded with: I thought that the purpose of the Employee Committe Thanksgiving event, like all Employee Committee social events, was to bring the company together, and boost morale among the employees. The fact that "hourly" employees need to clock out, and thus, make up, extra time for such an event seems to defeat the purpose of having anything at all. I cannot speak for everyone, but I take great offense at this policy.
You might say, that in responding, I was, in fact speaking for everyone, but I couldn't help it. Fuck grammatical correctness. There were principles in peril. And I had a point to make.
So anyway, now, many of the "hourlies" are planning a revolt, and even some salaried, at least those with hearts and minds still their own, in response to this occurrence. I'd like to put it to uber...what do you say about a peasant revolt?
User Reviews
Submitted by the_lone_stranger (user info) at 2004-11-22 20:13:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Fuck you I won't do what you tell me!
Submitted by DanielH (user info) at 2004-11-22 19:51:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
many of the "hourlies" are planning a revolt. !!!
Submitted by beer-turtle (user info) at 2004-11-22 18:24:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I am one of the professional shit-disturbers/inciters/provokers in my office. If something gets done poorly, management will hear about it from me and my idiots for weeks.
-Turtle
Submitted by Zandy1123 (user info) at 2004-11-22 16:19:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2004-11-22 15:57:15 (#)
Ranking: 2
Poop on your boss's desk and then post a story about it on Ubersite. I'm addicted to poop stories and I need a fix.
---
wow...+2 for that
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2004-11-22 16:01:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I agree with a previous poster that that is not quite big brother, big brother is the nasty appliance on our network tracking the sites that our users are visiting, man I hate that thing. but.....
Coporate america sucks balls and you should definitely fight that BS. My company holds company wide meetings on saturdays so that billing consultants don't miss any billing time. we don't get anything extra for it and it burns my already precious not at work time. Fight the power!
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2004-11-22 15:57:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Poop on your boss's desk and then post a story about it on Ubersite. I'm addicted to poop stories and I need a fix.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2004-11-22 15:51:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Corporate America sucks butt and
I most definitely have a case of the Monday's.
Submitted by Davros (user info) at 2004-11-22 15:49:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Fight the Power.
-Davros
Submitted by Nicole3 (user info) at 2004-11-22 15:34:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
My advice is to get out your pitchfork and start your rebel rousing..
Submitted by RamJetMax (user info) at 2004-11-22 15:33:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Stick it to the man.
Submitted by JMG114 (user info) at 2004-11-22 15:31:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Corporate is stupid. Escape while you can.
At my former company's pointless staff meetings, they'd give out little knick-knacks and toys as rewards for showing up. I made it a practice to be one of the first ones in the room, take a knick-knack, and then leave. Of course, I'd be depriving someone else of their own little gadget, but if you're stupid enough to attend a staff meeting willingly, then you don't deserve a toy.
Submitted by Noido (user info) at 2004-11-22 15:30:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
that would be 1984 george orwell big brother, surely?
Submitted by Donitsu2002 (user info) at 2004-11-22 15:29:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I used to just not clock out.
Submitted by Sassmasterr (user info) at 2004-11-22 15:29:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
stockpile some torches, extra batteries, and battery powered things. also, look into building some sort of a battering ram.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2004-11-22 15:28:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Um, wrong use of Big Brother.
I know Big Brother.
I *am* Big Brother.
I sit at a desk all day, and I watch people on cameras they have no idea exist.
I know enough secerts about enough people that I could be a millionaire if I could only get them to stop and talk for 20 seconds...
Submitted by kai070169 (user info) at 2004-11-22 15:27:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Quit whining & double up on free office supplies.
Submitted by Loren1 (user info) at 2004-11-22 15:26:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Kick ass and take names!
Also, it might not hurt to refresh that resume :-)