Cubicles (1,1) (842 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 2 on 16 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Impassive-Digressive (View user info) at 2004-11-25 20:42:26 EST
"Angles." He muttered, to the tepid office air. "The angles are all wrong." In keeping with tradition, the air offered no reply. A lady from Accounts Payable (Domestic) scurried past his cubicle, clutching a bundle of files to her chest as though it were a babe newborn. In her wake drifted sugar, flowers and a shade of musk. He inhaled deeply, his gaze catching the air-conditioning vent. Eyes briefly alight, he pulled a small notebook from a crowded trouser pocket, flipping through pages of spidery scrawl. Arriving at a page titled 'Ideas' he scribbled the words 'Air Shampoo' before flipping the book shut and returning it to the collection of jumbled miscellany that dwelt by his right thigh.
"Air conditioner, Air Shampoo.
It's smells good, and the air will too."
He sang his little jingle in a quiet voice before stifling a giggle, and returning his attention to the squat, black computer on the desk in front of him.
"Too sharp. Too stark. Angles all wrong." Cautiously, he ran a finger along the edge of the new computer's matt black casing, avoiding the sharp corners. Furtively, he glanced around the room.
"Corners, straight edges, everywhere." The desks and filing cabinets maintained their silence, as he spat his accusations at them. "Sharp and ugly." He proclaimed. The corporate-grey walls of his cubicle absorbed his derision impassively.
Behind him, the two clocks rebelled, fighting the overpowering office squareocracy. Round-face and defiant, they clung to the wall. Even they, however, had been bent under the regime's angular yoke, rectangular labels fixed above them. 'U.S.' and 'U.K.' they read. For the longest time he had wanted to change it to 'U.S.' and 'T.H.E.M.' but feared the consequences of such an act, should the corner-office-dwelling Senior Administrator discover the culprit.
He leaned back in his chair, and peered down the row of cubicles. His sat at the bottom left-hand corner of the small corporate battery farm; four cubes by four cubes. Co-workers hunched over their desks, the backs of chairs peeking out slightly into the narrow walking space. The atmosphere of the quiet office was tinged with whispered conversation, the incessant tapping of computer keyboards and shuffling of paper - the ubiquitous (and horribly unpleasant) straight-edged variety.
Returning his attention to his desk, he noticed his in-tray was beginning to overflow with the very same paper. Great wads of it waited patiently for processing. A resolute look on his face, he fished a drafting compass and pair of scissors from one of his drawers and removed the top sheet. Deftly, he traced curves onto the paper and presently began to cut along the newly-formed lines.
He smiled triumphantly as he deposited the sharp-edged trimmings in his waste-paper basket. Round memos were far easier on the eyes. He giggled, holding the paper aloft.
"Much easier to circulate."
User Reviews
Submitted by Calios (user info) at 2005-06-24 19:22:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
O
Submitted by Impassive-Digressive (user info) at 2004-12-03 01:51:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by wookie (user info) at 2004-12-02 09:01:56 (#)
Ranking: 2
I read this one last and the others first; I love that they're tied together by the circular paper.
Awesome work.
---------------------------------
That worked as I intended then. I wanted them all to be self-sufficient with regard to plot, but to still throw the occasional tie-in as well. Hooray for that working!
Submitted by wookie (user info) at 2004-12-02 09:01:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I read this one last and the others first; I love that they're tied together by the circular paper.
Awesome work.
Submitted by mrwolf (user info) at 2004-11-30 08:33:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
beautifully written
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-11-30 08:11:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Impassive-Digressive (user info) at 2004-11-26 19:54:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Davros - My apologies. I look forward to it when you do post it.
LadyPlural - I seethe with jealousy. Working in an office is sending me insane.
Submitted by Davros (user info) at 2004-11-26 15:02:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Note to self.
Postpone the story about a guy in a cubicle going slowly insane.
Damn you ID
-2
-Davros
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2004-11-26 13:11:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ok. I don't even work in an office! HAHAHAHAHA!
They pay me to mostly sit around backstage and watch various performances. I love my job.
Submitted by Ex_Lux_Astrum (user info) at 2004-11-26 12:45:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
it really does convey the stark, sterile, frustrating futility of the corporate realm......... God help us all.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2004-11-26 12:39:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I cut my memo's into Starfish.
Submitted by Iago (user info) at 2004-11-26 06:19:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
good
Submitted by AshK (user info) at 2004-11-25 22:56:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I hate my cubicle
Submitted by Impassive-Digressive (user info) at 2004-11-25 22:55:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
To be honest, LadyPlural, neither do I. My train of thought on this one wouldn't have been half as effective in an open plan setting though.
"So, Peter, I hear you've been having some trouble with your TPS reports..."
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2004-11-25 22:28:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I liked this. And I don't even work in a cubicle! HAHAHA
Sorry. I felt a need to gloat.
Please don't horribly snap and shoot me one day, please.
Submitted by FunnyAsCancer (user info) at 2004-11-25 22:07:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Brilliant.
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2004-11-25 21:57:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Very nice.