My New Fear of Camping. (590 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 0.5 on 7 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Thored (View user info) at 2004-12-01 18:14:38 EST
The Manly Camping Trip
As many of you Americas don't know, Sudbury is a town of 13,000 people. The nickel used in producing the Canadian nickel is mined there. Wouldn't you know, there's a massive Nickel when you enter the city.
Now you have the useless background knowledge, onto my trip. Myself and several other buddies started packing last week. All the bare essentials for braving a trip to the great not-so white north of Canada. We packed for snow, we got rain. Before that however, we had the wonderful six and a half hour drive. On our way, we stopped five times to piss, three times to eat, one time because someone had to puke, and another time because we thought someone was naked... let me rephrase, we thought we saw a naked woman.
So we arrive and unpack our limited supplies for this camping trip. Braving the north with nothing but a Motor-Master Power Converter, a Jeep Grand Cherokee, A Coleman electric stove, a Sony laptop, three cases of Pepsi ( The one thats forever young ), five cases of Coors Light ( The silver bullet), Two Eight men tents ( for five people ), and enough clothes for the month. Its obvious many of us had our girlfriends pack for us. Why is it women pack the entire house, whereas men, straight men, pack just what they need? For example; one of the guys with us, lets call him not me, even brought one of those inflatable beds complete with sheets and blankets. Now that we had destroyed any chance at being one with nature, it was time to set up the tents.
Six Hours later...
The first tent had been successfully wrecked, when someone else who wasn't me, snapped the fucking tent pole. Now five men, would need to sleep together in one tent. This trip was getting gayer by the minute.
Yadda-Yadda-Yadda
Skip to nighttime.
I began feeling I had a headache, not from the long car ride, but something just felt wrong. I began shaking my head, it could have been the water from the swim. No... wasn't that either. "Oh fuck! No, something seriously fucking hurts." I folded over, holding my head. "Stop being a fucking sissy." I got as a reply. "No seriously, Fuck this, I'm headed to the hospital in town, I think I'm having a fucking stroke or something". Not the stupidest thing I've ever said, but its up there. Anyways, skip to hospital, and I had the doctor take a look at me. He concluded it was probably water on the ear, and he could give my ear a proper cleaning. So he inserted into my head, an object I swore was used by the Egyptians to tear someones brain from their skull. "Oh my lord." Was the next thing I can remember the doctor saying...
The next thing I know, he pulled out a moth. Thats right, a fucking moth, I absolutely couldn't believe it. I had, a fucking moth... inside, my skull. I can't wait to hear the puns that come out of this one.
I've concluded, camping isn't for me.
User Reviews
Submitted by Joemama (user info) at 2004-12-02 04:24:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Bugs suck.....can't see their eyes.....don't know what their intentions are......
Submitted by kai070169 (user info) at 2004-12-02 00:49:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'M AFRAID TOO!
Submitted by Saxon (user info) at 2004-12-01 23:36:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Moths are attracted to light. maybe light bulbs really do come on inside our heads when we get a idea.
Submitted by Thored (user info) at 2004-12-01 22:43:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I dont fucking know.
Submitted by Impassive-Digressive (user info) at 2004-12-01 20:34:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
How the hell do you get a moth stuck in your ear??
Submitted by Thored (user info) at 2004-12-01 18:55:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Wow, I expected something far more hurtfull than that from you. I feel special, I love you too fuckface. lol
Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2004-12-01 18:21:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
WTF CAMPXOR N00B OMG WALLHAXOR