Here's My Soul, Fancy A Stab? (736 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.69 on 19 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by SoxSexSax (View user info) at 2004-12-02 09:59:06 EST
I am weak and pathetic.
I am a hypocrite.
Like so many others, I announced in a fit of rage that I would never again grace this nest of moronic, opinionated fools with my splendid work.
Like so many others before me, I have failed.
I get so lonely now at nights, knowing that my pride forbids me from typing the sweet, sweet "www.ubersite.com" into my temptingly always visible address bar.
I don't think I can take the pain any more.
I'll kill myself.
Yep.
Only solution.
Oh, sure, I could go back to Uber, swallow my pride and begin posting again. But then I'd have to endure chants of "PWNED!!!" and "Who cares?", and it is far more than my poor, bruised ego could possibly withstand.
I mean, let's face it, I doubt there's gonna be anyone exactly pleased to see me. Last time I posted here I believe I pretty much insulted every single person in the US.
Not to mention the fact that I hooked people on a serial story and then left it half finsihed. Man I'm a douche.
So its suicide for me.
Absolutely.
Matron, pass me my gun.
What do you mean, it's a banana?
Well, apparently suicide is out as well. Can't even get that right. Dammit!
I've written a poem that comes deep from the heart. Please try and contain your tears.
Oh why does everyone hate poor Sox?
They'd like to lock him in a box.
And make him sniff their smelly socks!
Oh please God tell me why.
Heartbreaking, isn't it?
I'll go now. My loneliness is probably bringing you all down. Spare a thought for Sox as you lie in bed breathing tonight...for Sox will be sleeping with the fishes.
Bon voyage, my friends. Bon voyage.
User Reviews
Submitted by thricepalermo (user info) at 2004-12-02 11:57:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Chill dude...
Submitted by whataefag (user info) at 2004-12-02 11:41:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
great example of a short, brilliant post. The title alone gets a +2.
Submitted by Phinch (user info) at 2004-12-02 11:27:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
quit yer bitching and write the next chapter to inferno.
And for God's sake, take the bannana out of your mouth.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2004-12-02 11:21:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I hope today's been a better day for you than yesterday was, Stin.
Submitted by Stin (user info) at 2004-12-02 11:17:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Sorry Jeanneee, it wasn't a slight at you. I just found it amusing.
It's been a long day :o)
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2004-12-02 11:13:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by Stin (user info) at 2004-12-02 11:03:05 (#)
Ranking: 2
User 13034 telling User 60 how Uber works.
I love it.
-------------------------------
Didn't mean to be presumptuous or put on airs, dahling. Just trying to be nice.
Submitted by Stin (user info) at 2004-12-02 11:03:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
User 13034 telling User 60 how Uber works.
I love it.
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2004-12-02 10:57:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I missed you...
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2004-12-02 10:56:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Stay.
Please???
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-12-02 10:44:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
hey you rhymed sox with socks.
you english people suck.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2004-12-02 10:35:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Dear heart, your ego is obviously far too fragile for an environment like Uberiste. If you are posting stuff on here looking for accolades and validation, you are definitely barking up the wrong tree. No matter how brilliant your stuff is, there will always be someone on here who will give you a "-2 DON'T BREED" or some other witty retort just out of spite. Post to amuse yourself and others. If they aren't amused or entertained, don't worry about it.
Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2004-12-02 10:24:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Hey, I was just kidding...you can tell because it wasn't funny.
Remembering reading somewhere you used to be on the MVA (looooong ago), so you can't be that bad. Stick around.
Submitted by AwesomeJohnson (user info) at 2004-12-02 10:21:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I don't know who you are either. But you don't seem to suck, so stay.
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2004-12-02 10:20:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I think you are interesting.
Submitted by FuckTheArmy (user info) at 2004-12-02 10:19:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
If you pissed off half the US, you probably made them think. Good or bad, I don't care so much, but you made them think.
Submitted by mrwolf (user info) at 2004-12-02 10:18:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Matron, pass me my gun.
What do you mean, it's a banana?
Well, apparently suicide is out as well. Can't even get that right. Dammit!
---------------------------------------------------------------
I wish I could have heard John Cleese deliver that line for you. It was very fawlty towers if you say it all angry and british like.
Submitted by Stin (user info) at 2004-12-02 10:11:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Good to have you back. Please stay.
Submitted by SoxSexSax (user info) at 2004-12-02 10:05:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
"Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2004-12-02 10:02:42 (#)
Ranking: 0
Deepthroat the banana. Your relatives can use the story as an ice-breaker at your funeral.
I don't know you."
Twist the knife, why don't you? <Whimper>
Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2004-12-02 10:02:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Deepthroat the banana. Your relatives can use the story as an ice-breaker at your funeral.
I don't know you.