field trip. (575 hits)
Category: GeneralRating: -1.38 on 10 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by thedude (View user info) at 2004-12-06 10:17:14 EST
Ok so there I am, at the bus stop. My bus is late, when it comes I get on, when I cum I get off. Suddenly the bus driver swerves off the road and into a field. I promptly shit my pants.
Too shocked to scream myself, I look to my fellow commuters wondering why they aren't screaming on my behalf. As the bus continues to drive though the field, carefully not avoiding any local farm life, I get my answer they are all monkeys. Ok not all some where orang-utans and there was one silver back Gorilla but mostly monkeys. They didn't seem too concerned with out present circumstances, not surprising considering the fascinating article on page 6 of the Metro regarding deforestation of the Amazon rain forest. Almost as suddenly as the bus made its unscheduled detour past George Orwels house it stopped. I figured maybe it was time to make like an elephant's dick and hit the road. I got off the bus, one of the orang-utans and a monkey they exchanged business cards and went there separate ways as the bus pulled away. I stood by the bus stop, ok tree, clinging to the on reality left to me - the shit that was slowly working its warm, smelly way down my legs to my shoes. I figured that I had better change my pants and get to work, so I headed off in the direction of my house through the fields.
Stopping only once, to repossess one of the unluckier sheep of its now useless skin with the idea of some nice slippers for the winter, I was home with in hour. I showered, changed left the sheep skin to soak in the tub and called a cab to work. All in all I was only an hour late by the time I got to work. I got in sat at my desk and masturbated over some porn e-mailed to me by a friend and took the rest of the day off. Picking up a large needle and some heavy-duty thread on my way home.
User Reviews
Submitted by thedude (user info) at 2004-12-07 04:33:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Thanks for the +2. It is pretty crap. I was just bored and found myself punching at the keys and figured why waste it like I do most things. So I posted it, and know everyone knows its crap.
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2004-12-06 13:16:25 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
I'm sorry to say it, but this wasn't very good at all.
You're not hitting the random-yet-funny mark you appear to be aiming for.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2004-12-06 12:12:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I would give this a zero because it was pretty boring to be honest. But have a +2 to compensate for the rude pricks down there.
Submitted by bargled (user info) at 2004-12-06 11:28:36 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
LOL!
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-12-06 11:24:29 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
i stopped at
'O'
Submitted by thedude (user info) at 2004-12-06 10:44:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
that hurt
Submitted by girlintheworld (user info) at 2004-12-06 10:42:08 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I got lost at "Ok, so..."
Submitted by Sassmasterr (user info) at 2004-12-06 10:31:31 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
may all your deaths come true
Submitted by knucklesnelson (user info) at 2004-12-06 10:29:26 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Buy a car bitch.
oh and -2 DIE!
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2004-12-06 10:21:35 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
"Ok so there I am..."