A message to Christians, from a Christian. (787 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 0.14 on 27 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by The Lord is my shepherd. (View user info) at 2004-12-08 17:44:16 EST
Fellow Christians, please listen to me. I know that a lot of you are trying your hardest to be righteous and follow the gospel, but I fear many of you aren't taking your faith seriously enough. I think many of you are listening to the heathens when they tell you to be "compassionate" and "loving". I fear many of you have fallen into the path of "tolerance" and "acceptance", and those are exactly the kinds of actions that will land you in hell, burning for all eternity. But don't take my word for it, listen to God:
On non-believers:
Ye shall keep the sabbath ... every one that defileth it shall surely be put to death Exodus 31:14
He that blasphemeth the name of the LORD, he shall surely be put to death, and all the congregation shall certainly stone him Leviticus 24:16
If thy brother, the son of thy mother, or thy son, or thy daughter, or the wife of thy bosom, or thy friend, which is as thine own soul, entice thee secretly, saying, Let us go and serve other gods, which thou hast not known ... thou shalt surely kill him; thine hand shall be first upon him to put him to death, and afterwards the hand of all the people. And thou shalt stone him with stones, that he die. Deuteronomy 13:6-10
And the man that ... will not hearken unto the priest ... that man shall die. Deuteronomy 17:12
Whosoever would not seek the LORD God of Israel should be put to death, whether small or great, whether man or woman. 2 Chronicles 15:13
On war, and crusades:
The LORD is a man of war. Exodus 15:3
Thou shalt not suffer a witch to live. Exodus 22:18
And the LORD our God delivered him before us; and we smote him, and his sons, and all his people. and we took all his cities at that time, and utterly destroyed the men, and the women, and the little ones, of every city, we left none to remain. Deuteronomy 2:33-34
And when the LORD thy God shall deliver them before thee; thou shalt smite them, and utterly destroy them; thou shalt make no covenant with them, nor shew mercy unto them. Deuteronomy 7:2
And when the LORD thy God hath delivered it into thine hands, thou shalt smite every male thereof with the edge of the sword: But the women ... shalt thou take unto thyself. Deuteronomy 20:13-14
And they utterly destroyed all that was in the city, both man and woman, young and old, and ox, and sheep, and ass, with the edge of the sword. Joshua 6:21
On the gays:
Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it is an abomination. Leviticus 18:22
The shew of their countenance doth witness against them; and they declare their sin as Sodom, they hide it not. woe unto their soul! for they have invited evil into themselves. Isaiah 3:9
And the remnant of the Sodomites, which remained in the days of his father Asa, He took out of the land. 1 kings 22:46
If a man also lie with Mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have commited an abomination: They shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them. Leviticus 20:13
Well, I can't transcribe the whole Bible, but you get the picture. If you're not killing people, you're not doing God's will. The laws of the U.S. government don't matter in comparison to the laws of God. The bible was meant to be followed, not interpreted. Always remember, love thy neighbor, unless he's gay. See you in heaven ... maybe.
http://skepticsannotatedbible.com/index.html
User Reviews
Submitted by wardy (user info) at 2004-12-09 04:53:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
My dad can beat up your dad -- Jesus
This really was just worth a 0, there wasn't much to it. but i'm sure you were only looking for most heated, so here's a review to help you out.
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2004-12-09 04:46:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Your mother likes to screw.
Submitted by Joemama (user info) at 2004-12-09 02:56:53 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Ahhhh yes I've always admired people who accept "something" and then think backwards
from their "faith". I guess critical thought is just too difficult for these types of
individuals.
Submitted by whiskey_jack (user info) at 2004-12-08 23:13:54 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Why is it people always want to pick on Christianity? When theologists and historians break up religions they break them up into 2 catergorizes first: Tolerant & Intolerant. Chrisianity, Judism, and Islam are the intolerants and the rest are the tolerants. And even between those three Christainity is still often the gentler. If your doing what a good Christian is supposed too do you put the word of Jesus Christ before all else. His message was a good one of love, compassion, and other good junk 'n stuff. Judism can't say the same, and Islam sure as hell can't.
Submitted by miss_behvn (user info) at 2004-12-08 20:28:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I knew there was a reason I stopped going to church. I would have been stoned to death somewhere around my 15th birthday.
Its funny, but some sects of christianity are like this. If you are not one of "us" then you are damned to hell and we will not associate with you.
Submitted by DanielH (user info) at 2004-12-08 19:19:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
"Let ye who are without sin cast the first- OW!- -2!
. . . Ok that hurt, seriously. Stop throwing- OWW fuck!
Father, why hath thou forsaken -OW SHIT!
Submitted by MyNameIsTim (user info) at 2004-12-08 19:02:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
moderately clever...a good post - you had me thinking at the beginning that you were a christian, then subtly obvioulsy not by the end.
picking out a series of violent and "bad" passages to get try to convince peopel that everyone is gay-hating, war-loving, and muslim-killing like W...but remember - even satan quoted bible passages to get what he wanted (luke 4:9: the temptation of christ)
Submitted by Saxon (user info) at 2004-12-08 19:01:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh look theres beer in the fridge.
Submitted by Tickle (user info) at 2004-12-08 18:43:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Snark you fookin funny arse... AND devote follower of the bible I can tell from this series
http://www.ubersite.com/m/40647
Submitted by drfeggphd (user info) at 2004-12-08 18:35:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by Sofa_Ace (user info) at 2004-12-08 18:10:30 (#)
Ranking: 0
I bet I would have a higher rating if my audience was more intelligent. But, what more can you expect from Ubersite, right Mario?
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This would have been a +2, except I don't understand why you're calling me Mario?
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2004-12-08 18:34:13 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Oh yeah,
Almost forgot.
Shennanigans.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2004-12-08 18:29:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
As I see it you have a few choices here.
#1 - Die (preferred). This is an opportune time to prove that a person can indeed self crucify.
#2 - Continue your pathetic existence, get married, have a kid and mentally torture him into becoming a serial killer.
#3 - Masturbate and release untold years of sexual tension and fucking relax for once in your life.
FOR THE LOVE OF GOD AND KITTENS!!! PLEASE SLAP YOUR MONKEY!!!
Submitted by Degreeless_Capibara (user info) at 2004-12-08 18:13:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
An ungodly choice for B@W if I do say so myself. Now excuse me, I'm going to go worship a God other than the God of Israel. Wanna join me? Free cobbler, goddamnit.
Submitted by Death_Metal_Dude (user info) at 2004-12-08 18:11:43 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
'gans
Submitted by Sofa_Ace (user info) at 2004-12-08 18:10:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I bet I would have a higher rating if my audience was more intelligent. But, what more can you expect from Ubersite, right Mario?
Submitted by Mario (user info) at 2004-12-08 18:07:04 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Ah, what more could we expect from the fuck who wrote that he supports the killing of innocent Iraqis.
Submitted by StonedSilly (user info) at 2004-12-08 18:04:33 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I don't care if this is a joke or not, it's fucking stupid.
On a side note, on my arm:
"GOT SIN? I DO!"
Submitted by Mario (user info) at 2004-12-08 18:03:27 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Boo for this shite...know your audience. I'm Roman Catholic, but I object to anyone trying to put their religion out there like this, quit being Christianity's Don King.
Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2004-12-08 18:00:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Well if this was a joke then I am sorry. And stupid.
It's just hard to tell with Sofa Ace.
Submitted by Sofa_Ace (user info) at 2004-12-08 17:59:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by StonedSilly (user info) at 2004-12-08 17:50:40 (#)
Ranking: -2
FUCK OFF AND DIE YOU PIECE OF SHIT.
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That's the right attitude! Just change your name to "Stonedthesinners" and you could make a great Christian!
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2004-12-08 17:55:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Pr.31:6-9
"Give strong drink unto him that is ready to perish, and wine unto those that be of heavy hearts. Let him drink, and forget his poverty, and remember his misery no more."
Submitted by Valacosa (user info) at 2004-12-08 17:51:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
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Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2004-12-08 17:45:23 (#)
Ranking: -2
Fuck scripture.
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I think that was the point. If this wasn't sarcasm, why the link to the skeptics' bible?
Submitted by StonedSilly (user info) at 2004-12-08 17:50:40 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
FUCK OFF AND DIE YOU PIECE OF SHIT.
Submitted by Freakmagnet (user info) at 2004-12-08 17:49:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I hope to God that this is being sarcastic. +2 If it is. If it isn't enjoy this one because it is the only one you'll be getting.
Submitted by riggyrow (user info) at 2004-12-08 17:49:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Damn. God sure is a dick.
Submitted by GodLovesALittleLovin (user info) at 2004-12-08 17:47:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
you quoted the bible. You are so edgy.
Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2004-12-08 17:45:23 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Fuck scripture.