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Uber!!! Contest to fuck up the ignorant religious! (734 hits)

Category: Humor -> Dumb Jobs

Rating: 0.57 on 21 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Labels:

Submitted by Ralph Master Nator (View user info) at 2004-12-10 06:16:35 EST


i know i am retarded and no one will take anything i say serious. reading about separation of church and state post i realized something. i want to masturbate. and you are a bunch of ignorant son's of bitches. so without furthur ado i woulod like anyone on this site who thinks he can stump me with a question about my religion with a legitimate question they can ask me and if anyone stumps me which i doubt ill send them a clay copy of my penis.

Because honsetly you guys are stammering a bunch of shit about religion that you dont know anything about.A wise man once said "yes i can't spell, punctuate, use grammar correctly but i know more about anything than anyone i have ever met." i dont get out much.

Also, you hardcore atheist are just a bunch or pawns. I can't prove god or anything so don't ask me too but i know more about the atheist movement after google searching "Atheist" than any of you ever will. ( i read every 978.000 pages of the search results)

im not a Advocate for religion running the government and im not a church (im not a building) or anything but im smarter than you - FACT. So if there does happen to be a person on this site that think they can debate with me i would appreciate it greatly.

my religion is minian. it is based off the game zelda: the minish cap. there are minish (leprechauns for you heathens, but you dont call them leprechauns because thats like calling inuit eskimos its like an insult). they are not like dwarfs, who are also small but have normal sized head. or fairies, who can fly and have love magic. so the minish spread happiness to humans because thats the way they survive; by making humans happy!

its hte perfect symbiotic relationship, win-win situation. so they are invisible and live in our houses and in the wood and mountaints. they came from another world which lies in another dimension and the door opens once every 100 years. if you are unhappy then maybe the minish in your house died, you may have accidentaly stepped on it or something. then you should go to the woods where there are more minish and they will make you happier. you have to go naked though, even when its really cold.

oh and if you dont believe in minish they will crawl up your butthole and thats what causes diarrhea and kidney stones. also they watch when you masturbate.

also why are atheist full of sperm: look at this: "An Atheist loves himself and his fellow man instead of a god." but what if a man rapes and kills your wife? can you love him then? will you lvoe him them mr atheist?

the minish can not rape your wife because they have such small peeners, so my god (or GODS? question for the philosophical!) is superior.


zeldarocks.jpg (84 kB)

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User Reviews


Submitted by r0fl (user info) at 2006-02-12 18:49:30 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

Step 1: Find the "A" key. (I know you can, from you spelling "mountAints.")

Step 2: Move your finger one key to the left. (No, the other left... there you go)

Step 3: Every time you start a sentence, or begin to write the name of a place, person, or thing (like God, for example, press it.)

Step 4: Die. (-2)

Submitted by VelvetElvis (user info) at 2006-02-12 18:29:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

King Solomon wrote that the dead "are conscious of nothing at
all." So did John. This being so, looks like hell just froze over.


Submitted by Istaros (user info) at 2006-02-12 17:28:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 1

"Submitted by Nator (user info) at 2006-02-12 10:06:35 (#)
Ranking: 0

Gamespot says Torment is best game ever:
http://www.gamespot.com/features/6135401/

NO SURPRISE THERE EH?!

I thought Dak'kon was the most interesting, awesome character. Did you find out about Xachariah and got his liver and stuff? I missed that the first few plays through the game I think."

not yet, but i do know how. Coaxmetal, in the siege tower, was a pretty cool guy too.

and this post was somewhat funny, thus +1

Submitted by Herpes (user info) at 2004-12-10 16:42:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 1

Made me smile (+1)

Submitted by Lyric (user info) at 2004-12-10 15:40:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Highly amusing.

Submitted by darko (user info) at 2004-12-10 14:00:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

You are my hero

Submitted by rhi (user info) at 2004-12-10 13:48:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2



"you have to go naked though, even when its really cold."


hahaha.

Submitted by Donitsu2002 (user info) at 2004-12-10 13:42:37 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

BWA HAHAHAHAHA

oh wait, that's my brother you're attempting to make fun of.

Submitted by loki (user info) at 2004-12-10 13:39:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 1

you pray to smurfs?

Submitted by Durae (user info) at 2004-12-10 11:55:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

hahahahaha

Submitted by AlwaysAnEagle (user info) at 2004-12-10 11:54:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2004-12-10 06:22:50 (#)
Ranking: 0

It sucked, but it also ruled at the same time.
________________________________________________________________

AHAHAHAHAHAH

I am full of love magic.

Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2004-12-10 11:06:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

No Comment

Submitted by Hooktad (user info) at 2004-12-10 10:44:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

ha.
An atheist who loves himself and his fellow man would actually be called a secular humanist.


Submitted by the_mysterious_stranger (user info) at 2004-12-10 10:05:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

zelda rules

Submitted by xenon (user info) at 2004-12-10 09:01:38 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

No Comment

Submitted by FuckTheArmy (user info) at 2004-12-10 08:55:39 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

I need to know more about your religion before I can properly shit on it.

Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2004-12-10 08:52:34 EST (#)
Ranking: -1

Who cares?

Submitted by Scarlett13 (user info) at 2004-12-10 07:53:53 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

Blow me

Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2004-12-10 06:42:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

No Comment

Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2004-12-10 06:22:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

It sucked, but it also ruled at the same time.

Submitted by Merlina (user info) at 2004-12-10 06:21:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

"and im not a church (im not a building)..."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

BWAH HA HA HA HAAAA

*wipes tears from eyes*




The only danger is if they send us to that terrible Planet of the Apes
... Wait a minute, Statue of Liberty -- that was our planet! You
maniacs! You blew it up! Damn you! Damn you all to hell!

-- Homer Simpson
Deep Space Homer