My 4 yr old son appears to have a bigger penis than me, but rest assured, I'm doing all I can to undermine his self confidence (5498 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.88 on 108 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by shandythedog (View user info) at 2004-12-15 09:03:20 EST
Thanks to Sigmund Freud, we all know that the primary duties of any modern father are:
1. Avoid being murdered by son
2. Prevent son from fucking mother
These are duties that a father has not just to himself, but to society as a whole. The strength of our social fabric depends upon the stable nuclear family; the purity of our gene pool depends upon eliminating incest-bred deformities.
A son with a bigger penis than his dad's is a terrible threat. If my boy is allowed to develop unchecked he will soon see me as little more than an object of ridicule, and will be up his mum faster than he can build a Lego tower.
Rest assured, I've been doing all the obvious basics like feeding him a McDonalds-based diet high in fat and sugar, which will not only ensure he is fat and ugly and spotty, and hopefully diabetic, but will also create fatty padding around his groin to make his organ appear smaller. And of course I've taught him that his penis is shameful and dirty and that nudity is evil and that even glancing at another man's penis will send him straight to hell.
But in terms of undermining his general sense of self worth, I've taken a slightly unorthodox approach. I realised the error of the traditional methods when I read an excellent book by Charles Bukowski (well known for his large penis) about his relationship with his brutal father.
Bukowski's dad did everything that could possibly be expected of him. For example, he would force young Charles to mow their massive lawns repeatedly on very hot days. Then dad would lie down and look across the lawn. If he saw any irregularity, if even a blade of two of grass had been missed, he would beat the shit out of Charles with his leather belt and sometimes with an iron bar. He repressed and punished Charles with equal vigor in all the traditional areas.
For a while, this was successful. Charles was shy and unpopular at school and a failure academically and at sports.
However, it gradually became clear that the brutality was actually toughening Charles up. He seethed with inner anger, a powerful force. Soon he was a rebel, and the next thing you know he had become a cult underground writer, in fact, a great writer. Yes, he was also a wretched alcoholic bum living on skid row, but I think we can safely assume that he rooted his mum. What mother could resist an acclaimed poet and world famous Bad Boy? Especially one with a huge cock???
So, I have no intention of making the same mistake as Bukowski senior and countless other well meaning dads. Fortunately, even small children are actually very alert and sensitive creatures. Their sense of self worth can be completely degraded in subtle ways that carry no risk of creating a literary genius or a rebellious Bad Boy.
Rather than go into too much theory at this stage, let me just give you a couple of examples of my methods:
- When I play catch with little Isaac, I resist the temptation to smash the ball as hard as I can into his face and laugh at his bloody nose. Instead, I make a great show of trying to throw him a very gentle and easy catch, but I actually include subtle little feints that put him off balance, and then throw it to a spot that I know will be impossible to catch. I've also modified his catching balls with hidden weights so they follow an unpredictable arc. Each time he clumsily drops the ball, I put on an act of great patience and praise him with phrases like "great try mate, bad luck". But I make sure he can tell - from my tone of voice and facial expression - that this is just an act, and underneath I'm actually very disappointed with him. After he's dropped it twenty or thirty times in a row, I will let a moment of frustrated anger reveal itself, before quickly covering it up and going back to the false saccharine praise. I had to take some acting lessons to get all this down pat, but it's been worth it. By the way, it's also good if you can find kids his age who you can throw the ball to (a normal untampered ball of course) so he can see how easily they can catch it.
- From an early age, Isaac showed signs of being a fast runner and a fearless climber. Now, as a four year old, he is too scared to break into a trot and is nervous climbing the front step. This was easily achieved via patches of oil on the pavement and tree branches sawed three quarters of the way through.
- Isaac has never been a bedwetter, but he thinks he is and that's all that matters. Every night I sneak into his room with some warm water diluted with my own urine and pour it gently onto him. When he comes shamefaced into my bedroom to confess to another accident, I use the same method of false and sickly sweet tolerance and encouragement interspersed with brief flashes of genuine anger and disappointment outlined above. I was thrilled to see the fruits of my efforts when Isaac recently refused an invitation to a sleepover at a friend's house. He made up some lame excuse, but it was obvious he was ashamed of his bedwetting.
-With things like numbers and spelling it's the same principle - false patience and praise (that he can subtly detect as false) mixed with 'unguarded' moments of genuine anger, disappointment and weary resignation at the great effort that must be made to teach a dolt like him. I try and model my methods on the bitch at work who 'teaches' me complex new software programs.
Anyway, these are just a few examples. I hope they are helpful to any dads out there in my predicament. And of course, I'm always open to new hints or suggestions.
In fact, I'm thinking of establishing an online men's group where responsible modern dads can workshop these issues together. It could also be a way of coordinating resource sharing, which can be a vital tool.. For example, a mate at work has promised that when Isaac is a bit older and understands such things, I can borrow his grand executive office and bring Isaac in and pretend it's mine. If Isaac was to find out that I'm just a lowly cubicle clerk, it could undermine all of my good work.
I'll let you know as soon as the website's up and running.
For the time being, be strong and just remember that you DO NOT HAVE TO MEEKLY ACCEPT YOUR LARGE-PENISED SON CUTTING YOUR THROAT AND FUCKING HIS MOTHER.
User Reviews
Submitted by EchoBoxing (user info) at 2006-04-12 18:15:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
this post is the tits.
Submitted by a_reader (user info) at 2005-12-05 23:02:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2005-08-17 08:51:31 (#)
Ranking: 2
Best post ever.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2005-08-17 08:51:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Best post ever.
Submitted by Jo_of_the_golden_P (user info) at 2005-04-11 22:31:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That's the most beautifully contrived method of telling all of Über, "My son has a bigger dick than your son" that I have ever seen. Good show.
Submitted by EchoBoxing (user info) at 2005-01-10 12:57:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
awesome
Submitted by Tigre (user info) at 2004-12-18 03:40:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
LOLOCAUSTUSENDUOUS!
Submitted by killerchimp (user info) at 2004-12-18 03:16:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Pretty damn funny
Submitted by shandythedog (user info) at 2004-12-17 19:50:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
i'v just read your latest couple of posts t.chow.
very very interesting, must read them again when i'm not so intoxciated
Submitted by T.chow (user info) at 2004-12-17 19:33:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i went to brazil for the summer (i go to school and live in madison, wi) and when i got back i never got back into the uber-swing. i've been in and out, mostly lurking. lately though i've felt the urge to post again.
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2004-12-17 18:03:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by shandythedog (user info) at 2004-12-17 16:49:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
thanks T.Chow, that's very nice of you to say.
and i can reply in all sincerity that from time to time, as i keep bumbling endlessly around uber, i've wondered what has happened to T.Chow.
i really liked your writing, and now i think about it, looking back, it elevated this place.
i remember the santa clause series in particular, but the great thing about your posts was that they were never formulaic and you always seemed to by tryign different things.
what have you been up to? still writing online anywhere?
Submitted by T.chow (user info) at 2004-12-17 16:27:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 based on the title alone and the freudian reference
shandy you are one person that reminds me why i learned to love uber in the first place, and why i regret not coming more often.
Submitted by shandythedog (user info) at 2004-12-17 16:19:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by bluesmaster (user info) at 2004-12-17 09:36:41 (#)
Ranking: 2
Very creative. I just hope to my diarrhea that you aren't doing this in real life.
---
so do i! it's my subconscious that i'm worried about...
Submitted by lucid (user info) at 2004-12-17 12:30:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"- Isaac has never been a bedwetter, but he thinks he is and that's all that matters."
Don't worry about #1 and #2 on your agenda. Children never grow up the way you want them too so he'll prolly kill his mother and fuck you instead. You'll of done all you could by then and he'll just close with a "Nice try mate" before the bars slam shut on his cell.
Cest la vie.
Submitted by bluesmaster (user info) at 2004-12-17 09:36:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Very creative. I just hope to my diarrhea that you aren't doing this in real life.
Submitted by Awko (user info) at 2004-12-17 07:09:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Stabkill (user info) at 2004-12-17 04:31:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
AJ is frying his brain with too much intake. This gives you INTERFERENCE, AJ!! LAY OFF UBER for a day for better test scores!
This post was hilarious, even though AJ is right. It is an odd place this late.
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2004-12-17 04:31:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Funny, I just asked Bart the same thing.
I'd normally be to sleep by now, but I've got a history final in... 8 and a half hours.
I'm rereading almost half the material.
Goddamn Spanish Inquisition.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-12-17 04:27:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2004-12-17 04:13:10 (#)
Ranking: 2
Uber is too weird for me at 3 AM.
All the Brits are out acting like they own the place. """
You don't sleep much do you AJ ?
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2004-12-17 04:13:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Uber is too weird for me at 3 AM.
All the Brits are out acting like they own the place.
Submitted by wasabi (user info) at 2004-12-17 03:59:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
From the title, to the opening lines, to the end, this was great.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-12-17 03:45:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Wiggles (user info) at 2004-12-16 14:41:39 (#)
Ranking: 2
No, I'm not actually Shandy.
But Shandy's ego eventually grew so large that another human vessel (me) was required to carry what his pathetic Australian frame couldn't hold. This vessel was born about 19 years ago, right around the same time Shandy's messianic complex began to overload. """"
AAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!
Any room for some of mine?!!
Submitted by Zod (user info) at 2004-12-17 00:00:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Beautiful...just beautiful.
Submitted by only_slightly_bitter (user info) at 2004-12-16 22:16:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hehe.
Submitted by Wiggles (user info) at 2004-12-16 14:41:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No, I'm not actually Shandy.
But Shandy's ego eventually grew so large that another human vessel (me) was required to carry what his pathetic Australian frame couldn't hold. This vessel was born about 19 years ago, right around the same time Shandy's messianic complex began to overload.
Submitted by Heather (user info) at 2004-12-16 14:20:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
sick and funny... I think it may be a sign of some sort of mental problem when I laugh at this.
Submitted by wazzawazzayo (user info) at 2004-12-16 13:21:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I fucking love Charles Bukowski.
Submitted by Banga3386 (user info) at 2004-12-16 03:48:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
hah, well, right. at least kudos for your patience and morals
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-12-16 03:39:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
ITM! Woo!
I'm starting to think Wiggles is Shandy.
Could be the 'wacko' from last night though.
Submitted by klebe (user info) at 2004-12-16 00:55:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
hahahaha
....you are kidding of course.
Submitted by Seralena (user info) at 2004-12-15 23:42:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow. Just wow.
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2004-12-15 21:43:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Brilliant parenting there, Shandy. My hat is off to you.
My son lights fires.
Submitted by Wiggles (user info) at 2004-12-15 19:57:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
MRR
Submitted by JenBee (user info) at 2004-12-15 18:40:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment needed.
Submitted by Dead_0hi0_Sky (user info) at 2004-12-15 18:05:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2004-12-15 17:59:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by shandythedog (user info) at 2004-12-15 17:31:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by mystiamoon (user info) at 2004-12-15 14:28:27 (#)
Ranking: 2
My friend has four boys. One of them has had an abnormally large willy since birth. Most baby boys have that little button peener. One of her sons had a 2 incher at birth. His daddy is so proud that one day he will make a ton of money in porn and support the whole family
---
this boy's daddy is living in a fool's paradise. for the mum's sake at least, they must be warned!
Submitted by shandythedog (user info) at 2004-12-15 17:30:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
excellent point re winning over the masses, wiggles. heat is my only hope now the streak breakers have done their foul work
thanks so much for that poly. i don't suppose anyne has ever called you a t...?
shitfuck, i forget the name of the bukoswski book that description comes from. it's a conventional sort of autobiography i think - not particularly weird or sickening like his stories - and actually very good.
Submitted by Freight_Train (user info) at 2004-12-15 17:26:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by CanucksFan (user info) at 2004-12-15 17:22:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
- From an early age, Isaac showed signs of being a fast runner and a fearless climber. Now, as a four year old, he is too scared to break into a trot and is nervous climbing the front step. This was easily achieved via patches of oil on the pavement and tree branches sawed three quarters of the way through.
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2004-12-15 17:20:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Shandy I've decided to do you a favor.
I'm not going to post anything overtly humorous until this post gets on B@W.
Merry Christmas.
I'll just lower the competition level for you.
Submitted by Wiggles (user info) at 2004-12-15 17:14:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Check his penis for moles. It could be his downfall.
My tiny mole is a hideous distraction on what would be an otherwise PERFECT penis.
Submitted by Wiggles (user info) at 2004-12-15 17:12:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Actually, I just read this again, and even though it is definitely another B@W-type post, it is still marinated in a creamy sauce of good-ol'-fashioned-Shandy juice.
Submitted by Wiggles (user info) at 2004-12-15 17:07:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I just accidentally gave Shandy his first-ever rating of something other than +2.
AND IT FELT GREAT!!!
Submitted by Wiggles (user info) at 2004-12-15 17:06:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
HEAT!
Submitted by Wiggles (user info) at 2004-12-15 17:06:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
HEAT!
Submitted by Wiggles (user info) at 2004-12-15 17:06:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
HEAT!
Submitted by Wiggles (user info) at 2004-12-15 17:05:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This needs to get on Most Heated if Shandy is ever going to win over his new commercial audience.
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2004-12-15 15:55:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I've read alot of Bukowski, he's really the only Beat poet that can make 'beer shits' sound poetic. Which he does in about a hundred or so of his poems.
Submitted by shandythedog (user info) at 2004-12-15 15:32:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
itm my man!
a prophetic review indeed.
i'd like to hear of your latest adventures, and how many brazilain schoolgirls you have lined up for our sporting/literary project. i'll try and hop onto messenger in the next 5 mins or so if you're still around
Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2004-12-15 15:31:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Pile on the HEAT!!!
Submitted by Insanethemind (user info) at 2004-12-15 15:23:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Insanethemind (user info) at 2003-10-05 00:17:02 (#)
Ranking: -2
You literally cannot write for shit.
I cannot believe that you actually sat there and wasted your time writing this; it was fucking terrible.
Really, I hope you do not actually believe that was entertaining, because it wasn't . In fact, I am angry at you for posting it, it was so god awful.
--------
This review haS stood the test of time and bears repeating here.
I haven't had a chance to chat with you in a while std, are you back to the drudgery of employment or worse, wait, nothing's worse than that.
Question #2: Got any new Sc_t Videos that you could forward on?
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2004-12-15 15:20:39 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I really thought this would be funny - but it's not.
Here's something that IS funny - your kid will to pick which nursing home you go to!
BAHA. HA.
Submitted by Insanethemind (user info) at 2004-12-15 14:41:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You're a bad bad man std
Submitted by mystiamoon (user info) at 2004-12-15 14:28:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
My friend has four boys. One of them has had an abnormally large willy since birth. Most baby boys have that little button peener. One of her sons had a 2 incher at birth. His daddy is so proud that one day he will make a ton of money in porn and support the whole family.
Submitted by alu (user info) at 2004-12-15 14:22:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This post is awesomeness personified.
Submitted by lessthanfour (user info) at 2004-12-15 14:17:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for the title alone.. Then the opening bit about Freud.. This is genius.
Good show.
Submitted by Teephphah (user info) at 2004-12-15 14:00:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Feijuada (user info) at 2004-12-15 13:35:21 (#)
Ranking: 2
Kill him before he kills you.
______________________________________________
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Submitted by sebcharrot (user info) at 2004-12-15 13:40:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hahahahahahaha, brilliant.
Submitted by Feijuada (user info) at 2004-12-15 13:35:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Kill him before he kills you.
Submitted by comicbookguy (user info) at 2004-12-15 13:30:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
words fail me
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-12-15 13:23:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Wiggles (user info) at 2004-12-15 13:10:46 (#)
Ranking: 2
Shandy is leaving the underground to go commercial!
Rubbish!
But funny as fuck. """"
well said wiggs
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2004-12-15 13:17:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
How long was the streak she killed?
HOW LONG?
That... That's just not right...
Submitted by Wiggles (user info) at 2004-12-15 13:10:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Shandy is leaving the underground to go commercial!
Rubbish!
But funny as fuck.
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2004-12-15 13:05:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
the kid is going to write a book about you one day
Submitted by RoosterCogburn (user info) at 2004-12-15 12:42:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
good times
Submitted by William_Q_Percy (user info) at 2004-12-15 12:21:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Your son's penis has already passed through his mum's vag once in his life, any future offenses are merely semantics. If your son realizes this, he will fuck his mother with unbirdled freedom and joy, knowing full well that he has already committed this sin, and any future acts of the same deed make no diffference. Kind of like how a serial killer can't stop at just one, either.
I suggest making him overly sensitive and liberal. But the risk with this method is that he may end up slitting his mum's throat and fucking YOU in the ass instead.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-12-15 12:17:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Nicole!
Ruined the perfect streak!
Submitted by Yes (user info) at 2004-12-15 12:13:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
this is fucking terrible....
love it.
Submitted by Nicole3 (user info) at 2004-12-15 12:02:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
aahahaha. You should also set up a sight for women with big breasted daughters.
Submitted by mikethescottish (user info) at 2004-12-15 11:38:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You are a God amongst men.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-12-15 11:25:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
can't wait to read this stoned when i get home.
Submitted by DavyJones (user info) at 2004-12-15 11:11:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
B@W
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2004-12-15 11:06:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Try to say the following phrase without laughing: "There's nothing funny about child abuse."
Submitted by Walrus_King (user info) at 2004-12-15 10:45:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
heh
Submitted by G-prime (user info) at 2004-12-15 10:35:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
WOOOOO +2 STREAK
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-12-15 10:34:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
actually this is rather crap.
b@w?
pah!
piffle!
that is reserved for the likes of me.
not this upstart!
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2004-12-15 10:28:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
SCOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORE!
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2004-12-15 10:25:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm submitting it right now.
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2004-12-15 10:25:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You are a dick. :oP
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2004-12-15 10:24:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
If this doesn't get B@W then... then... I don't know.
But this is the hardest I've laughed in a long, long time.
I was afraid that reading Captain Apollo's post first would make this one seem less grandeurish. I was wrong. And grandeurish probably isn't a word.
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2004-12-15 10:21:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Most excellent
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2004-12-15 10:20:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow. I'm glad my weiner comes in "regular" size.
Submitted by Zoidberg (user info) at 2004-12-15 10:20:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Avals (user info) at 2004-12-15 10:17:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Har Har! You have a small peener!
Submitted by MichaelJackson (user info) at 2004-12-15 10:14:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for using the words "4 yr old son" and "bigger penis" in the same sentance!
Submitted by Loren1 (user info) at 2004-12-15 10:07:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Brilliant.
Submitted by MyNameIsTim (user info) at 2004-12-15 10:06:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
ha
Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2004-12-15 09:59:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2004-12-15 09:57:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
GO OEDAPUS WOOOOO!
Submitted by Mario (user info) at 2004-12-15 09:57:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You should also tell your son that you're not really his father, the real one left when he saw what a disappointment he was. Maybe now he'll go slit some random tramps throat and not his real father's.
Submitted by Ainkara (user info) at 2004-12-15 09:39:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hahahahha.... I think I love you
Submitted by FATMANTPK (user info) at 2004-12-15 09:36:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I am printing this and sealing it in a safe in case I ever have children.
Submitted by Merlina (user info) at 2004-12-15 09:35:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
WAAAAAAAAAAAH HA HA HA HA...
*picks self up from floor*
Submitted by hairycoo (user info) at 2004-12-15 09:31:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by CookieLass (user info) at 2004-12-15 09:26:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
teehee
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2004-12-15 09:25:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Fucking hysterical.
Submitted by shandythedog (user info) at 2004-12-15 09:22:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
funny you should mention post stealing, teephapah, as the reason i was recently calling apullo a cunt was he stole my idea for a greatest ever sporting moment post.
i'm not sure how he stole it, as i'd never mentioned it to anyone, but he did.
something fishy is going on.
Submitted by funk_boy (user info) at 2004-12-15 09:21:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-12-15 09:19:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by shandythedog (user info) at 2004-12-14 18:00:32 (#)
Ranking: 0
cunt! """"""
Submitted by Teephphah (user info) at 2004-12-15 09:19:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Dad? Is that you?
Actually, curse you Shandy for stealing (well, not "stealing" really, more like "coming up with first") an idea that I had been kicking around for a post vis a vis the Freudian Oedipal Complex.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-12-15 09:17:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I hesitate to say this but I think this is cleverest, wittiest thing I have read for free.
Of course you have written more philosophical posts but the sheer audacity of the scope and executing of the wit is just making me wax lyrical.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-12-15 09:14:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
That is one of the funniest things I have ever read.
Oh man.
I guffawed in several parts.
Submitted by Hadooken (user info) at 2004-12-15 09:13:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
disturbingly funny
Submitted by Ferretnose (user info) at 2004-12-15 09:11:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2004-12-15 09:11:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I love your "writing voice"
This post is awesome assuming this all isn't true.
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2004-12-15 09:10:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Submitted by Kent_Weirdo (user info) at 2004-12-15 09:07:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
HAW HAWHAW HAW HAWWW HAAAW!