Battle for Uber – Casting & Descriptions (part 1) (1508 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.71 on 85 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by PMJ <potatomanjack79.at.yahoo.com> (View user info) at 2004-12-16 14:35:54 EST
http://www.ubersite.com/m/53914 - Introduction
http://www.ubersite.com/m/54009 - Factions and Background
Now, here's the all important big first step that everyone's been waiting for. This is where you all find out exactly what your initial position will be at the start of the story.
Seeing as I've got over 100 (104 at time of counting) people who asked to be part, please understand that I've only put bigger descriptions for the main characters of each faction, whereas more minor players have one line summaries. I worked my fucking ass off to organize this shit and write the descriptions, so don't fucking complain if you don't like where you end up.
I separated users in one of 4 levels. Level one was for posters who I felt merited being leaders of factions. Level two was for good posters who I felt deserved an important role. Level three were for other strong posters who I felt deserved titled roles. Finally, level four was for the rest of the users who I don't know that well, and they only have one line descriptions.
In total, there are forty (yes, that's 4-0) titled roles. I have separated the casting posts into two, because trying to get it all done on one post would have made for far too long a post.
Remember, casting isn't over, so you can still sign up if you'd like. I just ask that you do so on the initial post to keep things more simple for me.
Under each section there will be a list of all those who are assigned to that team, and following the list there will be a description of each according to above. Here we go:
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THE MAELSTROM EMPIRE
Level 1
JMG114 - King
Although JMG114 inherited the throne through birth, he has proven his value as king on many an occasion through both wise decision and physical prowess. One tale tells of the time that an assassin snuck into his tent before a battle, and in although the assassin went down to the unarmed King, he was able to poison the JMG in the scuffle. The next day on the field, although puking his guts out from the poison, JMG still was able to fell 4 enemy troops, lead his troops to victory, and was heard to remark "This poison ain't got shit on the feeling of waking up after a fortnight bender!" He wields a two handed five foot battle axe that he has aptly named "Brew Storm", and few warriors of his empire can wield this giant weapon with the nimbleness that he can.
Level 2
C_A_T_A_L - 1st Blade of the "Blades of Bedlam Order"
C_A_T_A_L is the right hand man of the king, and the best warrior in the empire. He wields twin blades, and on the field of battle, his violent dual sword fury is practically unstoppable. As the leader of the highest knight order in The Maelstrom Empire the "Blades of Bedlam Order", he is governed the respect of the kingdom almost equal to that of the King himself. He is reputed to have slain over 100 enemies, and also to have polished off a bottle of Everclear in one standing.
Lojope - Head Spell Mistress of the Chaotic Arts
Although magic takes a second to physical strength in this empire, there are few who command both the respect and desire of so many as does Lojope, the head of Maelstrom's mage order. Her sudden temper along with her ability to wield the power of lightning as a child would play with a bauble has earned her the nickname "Lady Tempest." The two trademarks, for which she is best known, are pension for wearing extremely low cut robes of the deepest blue, and always carrying along with her, her iron ringed oaken staff.
1.21Giggawatts - Commander of the 1st Division & General of the Maelstrom Army
No one within the realm of Maelstrom has seen as much combat as had 1.21Giggawatts. He began his military career at the tender age of 15 as a frontline soldier on the field, and through cunning and strategy was able to not only survive over 40 years worth of battles of various scope, but also to rise through the ranks and eventually take the helm of the Maelstrom army. Many a time, this general has taken on what would seem to be impossible odds, and has transformed the day into one of victory.
Level 3
BillsSBChamps - 2nd Blade of the "Blades of Bedlam Order"
Through much practice, BillsSBChamps has created a unique fashion in which he wields his custom designed great sword. The blade of the weapon itself is at least 3 times as wide as the average sword, and his art involves an almost continuous whirlwind motion with the weapon so that its added weight and thus momentum are never reduced.
Spedmonkey - 2nd Blade of the "Blades of Bedlam Order"
The Maelstrom Empire may be renowned for its offensive nature, yet there are still those that pride themselves on defense within. Spedmonkey is the prime example of just that, and his tank-like bladed armor, and nightstick style swords allow his defensive maneuvers to be just as deadly as a well aimed attack.
Circe - 2nd Blade of the "Blades of Bedlam Order"
The top ranked female of this highest warrior clan is Circe. Her ability to throw back ale, and drink many of the stoutest men of the empire under the table is only matched by her ability to find the chink in almost any piece of armor with her long slender sword.
TigerLilly - Commander of the Archery Division of the Maelstrom Army
Having spent much of the early years of her life hunting and tracking animals in the wilderness as she grew up far isolated from the main of the empire, TigerLilly has learned both the necessary tactics of the hunt and the expert use of the bow that allow her to be a superior commander of the Archers of the Maelstrom Empire.
Totally_useless - Commander of the 2nd Division of the Maelstrom Army
Being born to wealth, Totally_useless was put into the highest ranked school in the empire. There, he found himself extremely bored, except for when in military studies class. This boredom (and thus mischief) led him to being kicked out of the school, upon whence he immediately joined the Maelstrom army as an officer where his natural affinity for war and tactics caused him to rise quickly to his current position.
Beer_bong - Grand Arcanum of the Chaotic Arts
Second only to Lojope in the use of magic within The Maelstrom Empire, Beer_bong's mastery of the chaotic forces is legendary. Mainly, he has focused his study on powers of earth, and he enjoys the feeling he gets when he has enemy troops swallowed by the ground upon which they stand.
Level 4
Kazzerax - 3rd Blade
A top ranking warrior who specializes in the use of spears
Snark - 3rd Blade
A high ranking fighter whose concentration is in dual wielded hatchets.
Stevie_says - 3rd Blade
An extremely powerful warrior who fights only with his spiked gauntlets.
Spooner - 3rd Blade
A tall and slender warrior who evades more than he attacks in order to wear down foes.
Funkchomper - 3rd Blade
A classic knight who believes in honor on the battle field.
Sg11588 - Lieutenant in the 1st Division
A young and skilled middle ranking officer under 1.21 Giggawatts
Ferretnose - Lieutenant in the 1st Division
A gruff older fighter who makes up for lack of smarts with experience.
BoogieFevuh - Expert Archer in the Archers Division
The top ranking archer of this unit of the Maelstrom Army.
Demolocke - Lieutenant in the 2nd Division
A quick witted officer who loves being in the thick of things with his troops.
Slovin - Lieutenant in the 2nd Division
A crossbow wielding officer that lays down suppressive bolts to protect his men.
RyuFu - Bodyguard to the King
A burly and skilled warrior that has sworn his life to protect JMG114
The_Walrus - Skilled Freelance Warrior
An expert swordsman that is loyal to the empire but not a member of its ranks.
Bizdorph - Mage of the Chaotic Arts
A spell user who make up for lack of control of his magic with sheer power of it.
Awko - Mage of the Chaotic Arts
This mage has a solid command over the powers of wind.
Slypher - Mage of the Chaotic Arts
A stylish mage who sometimes concentrates more on bagging lasses then on his spells.
Stabkill - Top Assassin of the Maelstrom Empire
A darkly clad figure who deals only in death.
___________
THE OOZING HORDE
Level 1
Polyamorousaj - High Chief
Within the Horde, respect is earned through size, intimidation, and extra body parts. The high chief and ruler of the Horde, Polyamorousaj excels in these three areas. When standing fully erect upon his solid base of 6 legs, he easily surpasses the 9 foot mark. Each of his 4 arms, which stem from both front and back, and left and right sides of his body, are strong enough to carry weapons which a normal warrior would need two arms just to lift, and also allow him to protect all of his mammoth person due to their strategic location. However, size and strength alone have not kept him in this head position. He is uncommonly wise for a member of the horde, and his ability to plan deviously has led him to not only be physically feared, but also mentally.
Level 2
MickGinny - Head Gladiator
Among the Oozing Horde, there are those who even the freakish members of this tribe consider a mutant. MickGinny is one of these members; however it is his incredible deformity that bestows upon him amazing combat prowess and the title of the most potent physical force in the faction. Should one look at him from the bottom up, at first he would appear normal, however, upon reaching his mid section, this idea would completely change, as his midsection resemble an inverted stump of a tree, with thick roots spring upwards in various shapes and sizes, all of which either wield a weapon of some kind or have eyes and a fang laden mouth at their end.
Maiorano84 - Master Shaman
Maiorano84 could almost pass for a regular man with somewhat yellowish skin, as his only visible deformities are his somewhat larger than normal head, and third eye which is usually hidden beneath his shirt (it is located in the center of his chest). It is not in the physical realm where he exceeds, but in that of the mental arts, where he is both a powerhouse when it comes to creating gigantic mind weapons, but also has the ability hazily see the future, and therefore be a pivotal character in the chief's consort.
Bigmike - Overseer of the Lowlands
The brother of polyamorousaj, Bigmike has also been blessed with great physical size and ability, and his 3 arm wielded Maul is legendary for its crushing ability within his hands. He has been instated as the head of the lower lands of the Horde's territory which is known for hosting the even more mutated creatures of this faction. As always, among brothers, although there is a family bond, there also exists jealousy, and it is for these reasons that the chief has cast Bigmike away from the center of the kingdom.
Level 3
Teephphah - Armourer Major
Not much is known about this head armor maker of the Horde, except that the pieces of protection that he produces are almost indestructible. What he is known for every so often killing the messenger who is sent to him when he is commissioned to produce a new piece of equipment for the chief. He is rumored to never leave his cave/forge.
Bargled - Troop Alpha
The army of this faction is separated in packs, and an 'Alpha' is assigned as the leader of each. Bargled has earned this title by striking down the previous leader in a one on one challenge. He was able to take outmatch the former Alpha by creating an unstoppable through his one gigantic arm spinning his massive spiked flail.
Godlovesalittlelovin - Troop Alpha
This high ranking member of the Horde military is also the oldest at his position, which says a lot as the troop Alpha's lives are constantly in danger from challenge. He is a tall and slender male without extra limb and is graced with a dark brown complexion which allows him to camouflage himself will in the swampy and murky Horde lands. He specializes in unarmed combat which makes his survival all the more impressive.
Kracka - Troop Alpha
When it comes to initiative, Kracka is at the head of the list when it comes to pack Alphas, as rather than allow anyone to gain the knowledge and skill required to challenge him, he will usually send a future potential challenger off on a mission with near impossible odds of completion, and should they return, he then will finish them off in their weakened state with a strike of his war axe while they lay in sleep.
Adamdidit2u - Troop Alpha
The final of the four Alphas, Adamdidit2u leads the army slinging and blowgun unit of ranged attackers. Challenges in this division are different than the rest, as the challenger will have to use stealth to beat his opponent as opposed to strength. His small frame and strangely worked malleable bone structure allow him to hide in places that a challenger would never suspect, and therefore get the drop on any who dare come against him.
BLITZKREIG_BOB - Great Shaman
One of the highest ranking people of the Horde to have been raised in the lowlands is Blitzkreig_Bob. His physical makeup is of what would appear to be a giant head covered with eyes, ears, and mouths set upon a tripod of legs, and this weaker physical status would have surely lead him to be a nobody, however his ability to create impenetrable fields of various size with his mind has allowed him to prosper instead.
Level 4
Jeanneee - Expert Shaman
A flirtatious mind magic user who commands a strong ability in general mind magic.
Fr057m0urn3 - Expert Shaman
A one eyed, one armed, one legged master of telekinesis.
Ingsoc - Expert Shaman
A body that rides upon a millipede like base, and fires potent waves of force.
Hunk - Troop Beta
A sub-commander under Bargled who carries a big-ass club.
Herpes - Troop Beta
This sub-commander fights with a dagger in each of his 8 hands which branch off 4 arms.
FreshPrince - Troop Beta
He is known for mutilation of both self and others with serrated blades.
G-Prime - Troop Beta
A sub-commander who has skilled with an extremely long bladed chain.
Rad1101 - Troop Beta
Sub-commander under Kracka that prefers his claws over weapons.
Adereterial - Troop Beta
The oldest living member of the Horde uses both physical and minor mental skills.
PyroBeast - Troop Beta
A master of poisons who has moved his transmuted his love into the use of blowguns.
Davros - Troop Beta
A slinging expert who wields 3 slings at once and fires them in an underhand manner.
Someone - Armourer Key
A renowned armourer who is best known for his bladed codpieces.
FuckTheArmy - Armourer Key
This excellent armourer both produces great work and fights in the front lines.
DCWoody - Arena Champion
Arena games are a popular attraction in the Horde faction, and DCWoody is a top fighter.
Nator - Insane Alchemist
Nator is the greatest alchemist in the Horde. And creates potions of every nature.
Tech-Junkie - Beast Tamer
This man of the animals is in charge of training the wolves and bears used in the army.
________________
Well, that's it for now. I should be back next week with the other half, so the rest of you will just have to wait until then.
I'll also sate one more time, if you want to be part of this, please sign up on the original post.
User Reviews
Submitted by Fr057m0urn3 (user info) at 2005-01-01 01:17:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Fr057m0urn3 - Expert Shaman
A one eyed, one armed, one legged master of telekinesis.
Holy shit, I can lift skirts with my mind!
Eh... never mind.
Submitted by FuckTheArmy (user info) at 2005-01-01 01:09:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Okay, the oozing horde will do.
I like knives far too much anyway.
Submitted by spedmonkey (user info) at 2004-12-31 15:26:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I sound pretty badass.
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2004-12-29 00:35:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't know if I've stated enough how fucking cool this series is...
Submitted by StonedSilly (user info) at 2004-12-25 15:12:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
StonedSilly - Crush of Elder
After Sideburns and Phinch, the three highest ranking members of the Elder clan are also its three most potent physical forces. Standing at 15 feet and being comprised of granite boulders, StonedSilly has well earned the title of 'Crush'. He is the most awe-inspiring battler of Elder, and there is nay a wall that can stand up to him.
Submitted by Bizdorph (user info) at 2004-12-25 15:04:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Bizdorph - Mage of the Chaotic Arts
A spell user who make up for lack of control of his magic with sheer power of it.
__________________
Hmm...a trigger happy mage, eh?
This totally makes up for my level four position. This'll be sweet.
I therefore reiterate that PMJ is a great guy for going to all this trouble.
Submitted by RyuFu (user info) at 2004-12-23 12:14:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Whoa, I forgot about this...J-Dawg's personal bodyguard, eh? Burly? You mean my battle-axe, right?
Awesooooome...
Submitted by JMG114 (user info) at 2004-12-22 17:03:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Woo! Battle axe!
I'll assume that "five-foot battle axe" is a euphamism for "penis."
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2004-12-21 16:52:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Bah! I just churned out a pretty decent post which is rare for me.
Why didn't I save it?
I dont have it in me anymore! waaaaaaah!
Submitted by potatomanjack (user info) at 2004-12-21 16:49:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
First: When do you start looking at our posts to see how we're doing? Are there certain "post time periods" for each "round"? Is there any advantage or disadvantage to writing multiple posts or is it just in general how good it is?
Second: Someone's probably already asked this: Is it OK to write posts about your character in the game, or would you rather the stories all left up to you?
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1. I'll start looking at post and all that once I finish the casting, so basically in two post. What I'll be looking at is just a general overview of posts written recently. That is to say that if I see a couple of post by you during the week and I like them, or they have good ratings, then you'll do well. If you post something crappy, or something ghey (like the recent ToxicNarcotic post) that'll make you do poorly, or perhaps die.
2. You can write about your character as much as you'd like, but anything that effects the actual plot of "Battle for Uber" will be done by me.
___
I just finished Hell's Swarm, and will start on Solemn & Elder tomorrow, so you could have the rest of the casting by then end of day tomorrow if all goes well.
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2004-12-21 08:35:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I can bend spoons and keys with my mind! WOO!
Submitted by GodLovesALittleLovin (user info) at 2004-12-20 20:49:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Oozing Horde is the RoXorS!
Submitted by The_Walrus (user info) at 2004-12-20 15:16:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You kickass PMJ.
Don't mess with my freelancin. But a couple questions.
First: When do you start looking at our posts to see how we're doing? Are there certain "post time periods" for each "round"? Is there any advantage or disadvantage to writing multiple posts or is it just in general how good it is?
Second: Someone's probably already asked this: Is it OK to write posts about your character in the game, or would you rather the stories all left up to you?
Submitted by DCWoody (user info) at 2004-12-19 18:47:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Damn I'm bored
Submitted by DCWoody (user info) at 2004-12-19 18:47:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
That was a joke, if you say no that is.
Submitted by DCWoody (user info) at 2004-12-19 18:46:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Okay my post isn't going so well...how about a bribe?
Submitted by DCWoody (user info) at 2004-12-19 18:21:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
www.ubersite.com/m/54716
I hope this gets good reviews, I ahven't had a successful post in ages.
Submitted by DCWoody (user info) at 2004-12-19 17:44:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This is cool and geeky at the same time, which makes it er...
Cooky.
I'm not sure if thats good or bad, but I like it.
Submitted by DarthAwesome (user info) at 2004-12-17 20:00:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
cool
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2004-12-17 18:15:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I... I... I...
I need a Pop-Tart...
Submitted by Slypher (user info) at 2004-12-17 18:07:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
See, I'm the guy who's always around when important things are happening making a fool of myself.
WHOO!
Submitted by Slypher (user info) at 2004-12-17 18:05:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
YEAH.
"Concentrates more on bagging ladies than on his spells."
YEAH.
Submitted by catscradle (user info) at 2004-12-17 17:46:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by NerfHerder (user info) at 2004-12-16 14:39:15 (#)
Ranking: 2
NEXT WEEK??
You're killin' me, Smalls.
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHAHAHAHA
Submitted by Awko (user info) at 2004-12-17 07:02:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
By wind do you mean the sort that nature uses to mess up my hair and blow chicks skirts up or the sort that I can use with the assisstance of a lighter to amuse myself and others?
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2004-12-16 22:22:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I will kill C_A_T_A_L.
Mark my words.
Submitted by Degreeless_Capibara (user info) at 2004-12-16 22:02:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I think AJ made it because he is 9 feet tall in real life.
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2004-12-16 21:59:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm glad I got put into the Oozing Horde (fitting for my real life deformities(I have two penii)), but I had no idea I'd be made high chief.
You're the man, PMJ.
GO HORDE!!!
Submitted by StonedSilly (user info) at 2004-12-16 21:25:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Can_Always_Trust_A_Liar (user info) at 2004-12-16 20:56:15 (#)
Ranking: 0
Well Stoned, I don't think the order casting has anything to do with it, in a website like this, order in which one signs up is usually the order in which a user sees the post,m which is totally random.
I'm assuming he had you fitting more into a role in one of the other two factions and simply decided to post these two faction
---
Then I'll reserve my +2 until I see something with my name in it, or until I see the first +2 worthy post.
I don't consider this to be +2 worthy, considering it's a list of people not including me.
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2004-12-16 21:02:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Gaunlets? Yesss...all my Wonder Woman cross-dressing will finally come in handy...
Submitted by Beer_bong (user info) at 2004-12-16 21:01:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Cool, I'm Legendary.
Submitted by Can_Always_Trust_A_Liar (user info) at 2004-12-16 20:56:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Well Stoned, I don't think the order casting has anything to do with it, in a website like this, order in which one signs up is usually the order in which a user sees the post,m which is totally random.
I'm assuming he had you fitting more into a role in one of the other two factions and simply decided to post these two factions first.
Submitted by StonedSilly (user info) at 2004-12-16 20:47:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Degreeless_Capibara (user info) at 2004-12-16 20:01:08 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by StonedSilly (user info) at 2004-12-16 17:27:30 (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm giving you this zero and this "Fuck you" for ignoring my request to be cast*.
---
Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2004-12-16 15:24:28 (#)
Ranking: -2
hey i signed up
---
Stop being a couple of sandy little buttholes. First off, he only did half of the casting. Second, even if he didn't put you in a role, consider the amount of work he had to do for this. Inevitably, there will be people who won't be cast (although since you two are pretty well-known, I'd say your chances are up), and some who will. If its the latter, you can always wait until the next uberfolk fiction to get your asses wiped.
------
Did you see a fucking -2 there?
I meant to imply that when I was cast, I'd give a +2.
If you're going to complain about the work he's doing on this, then why does he even do it? Work isn't fun, and you're always going to have a bunch of assholes (me) complain when people who signed up AFTER ME were cast before me.
I'll give this post and the next casting post a +2 if I see my name there, but for now it's a zero.
I don't care about the notoriety it seems you're implying that this will bring to me. I was and still am genuinely interested in seeing how it turned out, but I'm bound to be somewhat indignant when people who SIGNED UP AFTER ME are cast BEFORE ME.
Submitted by Can_Always_Trust_A_Liar (user info) at 2004-12-16 20:29:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Yeah people, what degreeless said. This is only have the "titled" characters, and this must have taken a lot of work. He has like, what 20 more? Plus, even if you aren't in it now, I'm sure oppritunities will arise within the story for new people to get involved.
Man, the Blades of Bedlam are gonna kick so much ass.
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2004-12-16 20:28:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm a hard drinking, ball breaking, bloodthirsty amazon-type warrior bitch?
With a sword?
Thank you!
Submitted by Can_Always_Trust_A_Liar (user info) at 2004-12-16 20:22:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Awesome man, this is gonna be great. You put a hell of a lot of effort into this, and I for one appreciate it. I can't wait to see how this turns out.
MAELSTROM!! WHOO!
Submitted by Degreeless_Capibara (user info) at 2004-12-16 20:01:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by StonedSilly (user info) at 2004-12-16 17:27:30 (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm giving you this zero and this "Fuck you" for ignoring my request to be cast*.
---
Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2004-12-16 15:24:28 (#)
Ranking: -2
hey i signed up
---
Stop being a couple of sandy little buttholes. First off, he only did half of the casting. Second, even if he didn't put you in a role, consider the amount of work he had to do for this. Inevitably, there will be people who won't be cast (although since you two are pretty well-known, I'd say your chances are up), and some who will. If its the latter, you can always wait until the next uberfolk fiction to get your asses wiped.
Submitted by Degreeless_Capibara (user info) at 2004-12-16 19:58:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Thanks for bringing out the LOTR in me. I can finally stop letting it fester in fear of sounding like a nerd.
Submitted by Zoidberg (user info) at 2004-12-16 19:45:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
and I shall be Matt, the varsity football player who gives you all wedgies and throws your dungeons and dragons board into the toilet
/me rolls +10 social life
Submitted by G-prime (user info) at 2004-12-16 19:14:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
What's a troop alpha for that matter?
Oooh, is a troop Alpha like first commander, and Beta is like second?
Submitted by G-prime (user info) at 2004-12-16 19:11:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
What's a Troop Beta?
Blade-like chain? That's pretty bad-ass... I once saw a guy get hit in the face with a chain. It was pretty messy.
Submitted by Davros (user info) at 2004-12-16 17:43:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"Davros - Troop Beta
A slinging expert who wields 3 slings at once and fires them in an underhand manner."
An underhand manner, hmmmm, are you suggesting something.
I don't care. I am saving up good posts for when this begins, so hurry up you MOFO.
-Dave
Submitted by StonedSilly (user info) at 2004-12-16 17:27:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Or is it 'cast?'
Submitted by StonedSilly (user info) at 2004-12-16 17:27:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm giving you this zero and this "Fuck you" for ignoring my request to be casted.
Submitted by Stabkill (user info) at 2004-12-16 16:35:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I didn't expect this to be as good as it already looks. Wow. Very cool.
Submitted by funkchomper (user info) at 2004-12-16 16:28:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Damn, this is going to be awesome. I always figured myself for a knight...
Submitted by Herpes (user info) at 2004-12-16 16:24:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
When I'm bored, I'm going to photoshop my entire Horde based on the descriptions you have given.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2004-12-16 16:14:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh,
Is it too late to ask that I be able to shoot the hatchets out of my ass... and blind my foes with my mirror'd disco ball peener?
Nevermind.
Submitted by maiorano84 (user info) at 2004-12-16 16:09:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Saaaay.... I'm not THAT bad.
Submitted by sg11588 (user info) at 2004-12-16 16:04:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Good job man.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2004-12-16 15:55:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
cool.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2004-12-16 15:53:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hatchets? Hatchets?
I get two of them?
Sweeeeeeeet.
Submitted by 1Point21Gigawatts (user info) at 2004-12-16 15:53:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Fuckin' A. I'm going to enjoy this a lot, being the goddamned commander of the Army of the most sought-after group in the battle.
Plus, I have chicks in command of some of my factions, and lojo by my side. On top of all this, my supervisor, the King, is Jared? Shit this rocks. I don't even mind being 55 years old - that's no where NEAR Hef's age and he still bangs chicks by the half-bakers dozen.
Submitted by William_Q_Percy (user info) at 2004-12-16 15:46:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
PIMPTASTIC!
Submitted by BoogieFevuh (user info) at 2004-12-16 15:46:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
BoogieFevuh - Expert Archer in the Archers Division
The top ranking archer of this unit of the Maelstrom Army.
Eat my arrowy fury!
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2004-12-16 15:37:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2004-12-16 15:24:28 (#)
Ranking: -2
hey i signed up
---------------------
hey hon! don't fret. he has more of the list coming. this is only some of the people.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2004-12-16 15:35:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
This is an awful lot of work.
I don't even put THIS much time into handicapping football games.
Submitted by Phinch (user info) at 2004-12-16 15:34:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
wowza.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2004-12-16 15:28:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Should I be in charge of something? I have 15 years experience bossing people around and kicking asses when needed.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2004-12-16 15:26:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Wait...I'm in?
That changes everything.
It's still dorky but with me in there, it helps increase the chances that there's a coolness quotient involved.
Sorry, PMJ.
Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2004-12-16 15:24:28 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
hey i signed up
Submitted by Smurfs (user info) at 2004-12-16 15:24:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
yay
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2004-12-16 15:20:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I had *better* be a level one Hellthingy. OR ELSE!!!
Yes, I realize that you barely know who I am. That just makes my threats all the more... threatening. Really.
Submitted by Demolocke (user info) at 2004-12-16 15:16:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I am proud to serve as Lieutenant of the 2nd Division. May my posts warrant victories for my empire!
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2004-12-16 15:14:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow. This is incredible. You really put a lot of work into this.
I can't wait to see how this pans out.
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2004-12-16 15:14:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Sweetness.
*claps in excitement*
*accidently shoots lightning at C_A_T_A_L*
Oops... sorry.
Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2004-12-16 15:06:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I look forward to JMG being dethroned.
Submitted by potatomanjack (user info) at 2004-12-16 15:06:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Ferretnose (user info) at 2004-12-16 15:03:19 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2004-12-16 14:56:38 (#)
Ranking: 2
Jeanneee, you're right. It does sound like
that.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2004-12-16 14:55:31 (#)
Ranking: 2
It sounds kinda like I'm a cocktease.
Well at least he made ya'll female! He made me an grumpy old fart. That's okay, I'll be a good sport about it. I've played weirder characters. If I have to be an old man, everyone picture me looking like Walter Matthau but with a sword. "Eat My Shorts!" -Grumpy Old Men
F.
______________
Sorry, I didn't realize you were a woman. I'll fix up the character once I get into the story.
Submitted by potatomanjack (user info) at 2004-12-16 15:03:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Remember, these are jsut the initial roles for everyone. Throughout the story, people will be moving up and down the ranks all the time.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2004-12-16 15:03:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You put a lot of work into that. Aren't banker busy?
I'm not really one to criticize though...I've been doing fuck all for weeks.
Submitted by Ferretnose (user info) at 2004-12-16 15:03:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2004-12-16 14:56:38 (#)
Ranking: 2
Jeanneee, you're right. It does sound like
that.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2004-12-16 14:55:31 (#)
Ranking: 2
It sounds kinda like I'm a cocktease.
Well at least he made ya'll female! He made me an grumpy old fart. That's okay, I'll be a good sport about it. I've played weirder characters. If I have to be an old man, everyone picture me looking like Walter Matthau but with a sword. "Eat My Shorts!" -Grumpy Old Men
F.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2004-12-16 14:56:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Jeanneee, you're right. It does sound like
that.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2004-12-16 14:55:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
It sounds kinda like I'm a cocktease.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2004-12-16 14:51:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Yes, but I am superior commander of the Archers of the Maelstrom Empire!
Watch out for me, or i'll getcha between the eyes with my bow and arrow.
Submitted by TheSpook (user info) at 2004-12-16 14:49:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This sounds like a fucking full-time job. Damn.
Submitted by potatomanjack (user info) at 2004-12-16 14:49:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2004-12-16 14:41:34 (#)
Ranking: -2
At first, I was disappointed that I wasn't included.
Then, after perusing this, I realized that this is really gay, geeky and fucking stupid and I'm happy not to be involved.
Thanks, PMJ!
----
Well, actually, I did have you being involved in one of the other two groups. If you no longer want to be in the story, that's fine, I'll take you off the list.
Submitted by Stin (user info) at 2004-12-16 14:48:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ooooh, bring on Part II!
Submitted by Kracka (user info) at 2004-12-16 14:47:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
of the THE MAELSTROM EMPIRE. just to be clear. the HORDE is going to take out everyone.
-Black Ninja
Submitted by Ferretnose (user info) at 2004-12-16 14:45:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ferretnose - Lieutenant in the 1st Division
A gruff older fighter who makes up for lack of smarts with experience.
Good God- I'm gruff, old, and stupid. Jeeeeebus. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
F.
Submitted by Kracka (user info) at 2004-12-16 14:43:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
level 3 rules all you bitches.
-Black Ninja
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2004-12-16 14:43:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh man, this is going to kick so much
ass. Thanks for including me!!
Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2004-12-16 14:41:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hope I'm in that wizard faction.
This has SO much promise.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2004-12-16 14:41:34 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
At first, I was disappointed that I wasn't included.
Then, after perusing this, I realized that this is really gay, geeky and fucking stupid and I'm happy not to be involved.
Thanks, PMJ!
Submitted by Teephphah (user info) at 2004-12-16 14:40:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Sweeeeeet! I live in a cave. I've honestly wished that I could do that!
Does that fact that I'm a blacksmith also mean that I'm big and burly? If so, also sweeeeeet.
Submitted by NerfHerder (user info) at 2004-12-16 14:39:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
NEXT WEEK??
You're killin' me, Smalls.
Submitted by tinactin (user info) at 2004-12-16 14:39:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
HAHAHA..AJ is your leader.
Good luck with that.