Cleanse Yourself From Your Sins For This Holiday Season (947 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.67 on 24 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Avals (View user info) at 2004-12-28 13:28:43 EST
Hark, ye sinners! It is time to cast aside your evil ways! Confess to your sins and your soul shall be cleansed!
http://www.comeclean.com/
But seriously; I'm not usually in the habit of posting posts consisting only of a link. However, this site is too perfect for Uber to pass up the chance.
In a nutshell, you get a flash doo-hickey that allows you to submit a short confession and thus cleanse yourself of your sins. (I'm no good with all that technology mumbo-jumbo. You see, back in my days we di'nt have any of em' fancy schmancy "computahs" and "anti-rape legislation." Oh, but I'm getting off track here. Back to the point...)
You also have the option of viewing other people's confessions; which is where YOU come in.
Now I know all of you (yes, I'm looking at YOU. Don't think I don't know about that thing you do with the remote and these banana peels when you think no one's around) have plenty of nasty, disgusting, vile, gross, inhuman... Where was I? Oh yes, bad confessions. So go on: Confess and cleanse your soul. It'll be fun to see what all the confessions look like after a day of Uber-abuse.
A few observations:
- Mentioning rape or murder in your confession will make the website threaten to call the law on your raping murdering ass. Curiously enough, kiddy porn doesn't seem to be considered all that harmful, and the program will gladly cleanse you of that kind of sin. Whew... I was starting to feel kind of guilty about all these 10 year-olds I seduced with candy and then forced to insert the candy into their butts while I took photos. I'm so glad I'm finally free from THAT one.
- The narrator seems to be a bit sensitive about bestiality. Perhaps she was a sexually-abused kangaroo in another life. I any event, I think it's best to be gentle on that topic.
- My requests to receive a handjob (you know, since her hands were already at my service anyway) seemed to fall on deaf ears. Maybe it's that ugly zit I have on my face, I don't know.
Prudish whore...
User Reviews
Submitted by Avals (user info) at 2005-01-06 06:53:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
No duh! I got it the first time.
<ejaculates>
I really should stop doing that.
Submitted by mystiamoon (user info) at 2005-01-05 16:20:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
DORK!
I MEANT, that she will have alot of handwashing to engage in, allowing the site to stay active forever.
Submitted by Avals (user info) at 2005-01-05 15:53:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by mystiamoon (user info) at 2005-01-05 04:46:33 (#)
Ranking: 2
i'm going to keep that site in buisness, thanks to you Avals!
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<ejaculates>
But seriously; as far as I can tell, that site's business is selling hand-soap, so unless you're planning to stock up on the stuff...
Submitted by mystiamoon (user info) at 2005-01-05 04:46:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i'm going to keep that site in buisness, thanks to you Avals!
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-01-03 05:51:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Your hands are now clean.
You have permission to enter the gift shop.
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Submitted by Tigre (user info) at 2005-01-03 05:48:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Avals (user info) at 2005-01-03 05:33:27 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-01-02 10:35:42 (#)
Ranking: -1
WHAT sins?
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Being a dirty cock-loving fag, for starters.
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Pwned.
Submitted by Avals (user info) at 2005-01-03 05:33:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-01-02 10:35:42 (#)
Ranking: -1
WHAT sins?
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Being a dirty cock-loving fag, for starters.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-01-02 10:35:42 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
WHAT sins?
Submitted by mystiamoon (user info) at 2005-01-02 10:12:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ok , I confessed, and I think YOU know what for.
Submitted by Avals (user info) at 2005-01-01 08:02:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
"I didn't read this, just dropped by to +2 you for this:"
Well that's nice of you.
What exactly is so special about that comment?
Submitted by Schwarzes_Glas (user info) at 2004-12-31 10:33:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I didn't read this, just dropped by to +2 you for this:
Submitted by Avals (user info) at 2004-12-31 09:36:06 (#)
Ranking: -2
What the fuck is the use of a working water delivery system when all it delivers is goddamn human shit?
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Submitted by Avals (user info) at 2004-12-29 15:18:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
<Ejaculates>
What?
Submitted by Avals (user info) at 2004-12-29 10:10:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2004-12-29 04:30:42 (#)
Ranking: 2
I confessed.
I cannot believe handsoap girl forgave all that.
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I am so turned on right now...
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2004-12-29 04:30:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I confessed.
I cannot believe handsoap girl forgave all that.
Submitted by Avals (user info) at 2004-12-29 03:43:29 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Shit. Ignore the +2; force of habit.
Submitted by Ed_0150 (user info) at 2004-12-29 03:43:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by Avals (user info) at 2004-12-29 03:42:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You've got to be fucking kidding me... 14 hours and only 6 reviews?! Where is the Uber-onslaught? The tidal wave of unrelenting ridicule that is supposed to wash over that website and drown it in a tumulous sea of the kind of sick one-liners only Uber can create? WHERE THE FUCK IS EVERYONE?!
Submitted by Avals (user info) at 2004-12-28 15:41:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
hidden101, I sure do hope they don't filter these. I don't think many Uberers would submit something clean enough to get through the filter, if you know what I mean.
On the other hand, I hope they don't filter all that by hand; for their sake...
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2004-12-28 14:15:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.geocities.com/hidden1012600/come_clean.JPG
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2004-12-28 14:11:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"I ate out the ass of a goat using Turkish gravy made from boiling the skins of my Turkish friend, Hameil."
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2004-12-28 14:07:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"i saw my sister naked" and "i found new uses for the vaccum cleaner" are the only risque ones i've seen so far. looks like they filter some of the really bad ones out.
i confessed about the time i masturbated in church.
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2004-12-28 14:05:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I put:
I'm fucking your wife and I have the Ghey Aids
I wrote the bible as a joke
I killed all the jews
I accidentally brought satan a virgin
I sold my soul for pop rocks
I framed MIchael Jackson
ect.
Funny stuff
Submitted by MaximusPadus (user info) at 2004-12-28 13:54:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"I am obsessed with monkeys."
I put "I masturbate furiously on the weekends. That's ALL I do!"
Submitted by bob (user info) at 2004-12-28 13:45:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
haha i put "Ive killed 23 people and ate their hearts after making cute hats with their skin for my family." and the thing went "we've recieved a few murder requests, we hope you are kidding."
hhahahahah..