The first page (586 hits)
Category: NoneLabels: fiction
Rating: 1.5 on 7 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Corn Nugget (View user info) at 2004-12-30 20:13:52 EST
(this is a continuation of my first UM post "for your eyes only"... even if you didn't read that post, this little story will be complete without any prior knowledge on the subject)
I savored the book. I ran my fingertips along the spine, across the cover and along the edges of the pages, leaving trails through the dust that had collected on the book over the years. I held it up to my nose and smelled it. Honestly, I was hoping for an exotic spicy smell, although I have no idea where I got that particular notion in my head. Instead of smelling like cloves or rosemary, it smelled like a pool of stagnant water.
As if I were a contemplative child on christmas day, appreciating every aspect of my gift before removing the wrappings. Before the wrappings were removed every gift is wonderful- but upon undressing any gift, there is always the chance that disappointment will lurk into the moment.
My biggest fear in the past 4 days was the fear of this disappointment. I had so many hopes for this book.
To give you a quick summary of the circumstances: I had been having some "spells" lately. I'd black out without warning, my awareness quickly returning- only I was seeing everything from someone elses perspective. I've spent nearly one year believing I was going crazy. I had come close to resigning myself to my mental disease- I was ready to commit myself to an institution.
Then my grandmother gave me this book. She told me I wasn't crazy, and that this book would prove it. Perhaps she didn't even SAY that... she may have implied it... or I may have imagined it. I'm not sure. I'm never sure anymore.
And now, after four days of procrastination and wishful thinking, it was time to open the book. It was time to either find relief from my insanity, or accept my fate as a lunatic. I would either be confronted with a new and exciting life, or I would beg my parents to find a good hospital in which to contain me. Then I'd have to convince them that perhaps my grandmother could use some help as well... seeing as how she had given me a book, implied it was magic, and sent me on my way.
I was relatively sure we were both crazy, but I had to hope.
Now I'm sitting on my bed, a sari wrapped around my body, and my hair twisted up and wrapped with a chignon. I chose this particular outfit because I wanted to represent who I was, and who I hoped to become. (yet another thing that points to my tendencies towards eccentricity. I don't know if I really wore it for effect, or in hopes that someone would peer into my room and be struck with the beauty and exoticism that I surely represented).
The book laid heavy in my lap and my heart laid heavy in my chest. I had decided yesterday that I would open the book to the first page, and go from there. I had considered opening it at random, or even near the end, but I was afraid that the power which lay dormant within the yellowed pages may be dependant on reading the book in the proper manner, from beginning to end.
I slid my finger under the cover of the book, and let it rest between the leather bound cover and the first lightly textured page. I found myself stuck. I hadn't decided weather I should quickly open the book, or take my time gently separating the cover from the contents.
I decided to do it fast.
I flipped the book open, dust spilled around me, and I anxiously glanced down at the first page.
Tod hat nicht mehr Kraft über ihm
French? No. That would be the expected language (of course, other than english, which was TRULY the language I assumed I'd be reading in) in a book given to me by my Creole grandmother. Hungarian? German? Latin?
This was going to be even more difficult than I expected.
(to be continued)
User Reviews
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2004-12-31 11:26:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Kai- I'm doing good. Just getting ready to head off to work.
Munkey- You're really good at giving compliments...! Thank you.
Shitfuck- YAY HAPPY HAPPY!!! (and, on a side note, the other day I dropped my cig. on the floor, and I said "shit-fuck", and promptly thought of you)
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2004-12-31 04:53:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
HAPPY NEW YEAR !!!!!!!!!!
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2004-12-31 00:38:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I love your writing style. You had my full attention from the first sentence.
Submitted by Wiggles (user info) at 2004-12-30 22:53:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2004-12-30 20:45:04 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
I'm already lost.
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2004-12-30 20:34:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
interesting
Submitted by kai070169 (user info) at 2004-12-30 20:15:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
How ya doin'Corny?