Red on the Head like a Dick on a Dog- 59 (2362 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.23 on 37 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Mickginny (View user info) at 2005-01-03 01:01:37 EST
My stepmother and I were discussing how I should celebrate New Year's eve, and I suggested lighting my hair on fire and running down the street screaming.
It was a good plan, but alas, was doomed to failure by my fondness for said hair.
Curses, foiled again.
So we took the next best step, and... well... See for yourself.
User Reviews
Submitted by boneface (user info) at 2005-03-21 02:14:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2005-03-12 22:35:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This one will be interesting to draw.
I like it.
Submitted by WillZone (user info) at 2005-02-14 15:47:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
red
Submitted by AshK (user info) at 2005-02-11 10:29:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
How can I rate your posts, if you insist on using a fake name? Huh? I think I shall cry.
Submitted by Electro (user info) at 2005-01-17 17:01:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
free +2!
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2005-01-17 15:19:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow, a camwhore!
You're young!
I feel dirty now.
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-01-03 21:40:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
You crafty bastard- that number is not working. REVENGE SHALL BE MINE!!
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-01-03 21:38:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Hahahaha, I've never actually called GLALL. That said, call you I shall. It will hsve to be a short call, but...
Submitted by Slypher (user info) at 2005-01-03 21:25:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I love you, LadyPlural.
CALL ME TOO!
707 255 4924
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-01-03 18:58:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh alright. I declare this war to be a draw, and I will call you at 2:07 am instead.
Submitted by GodLovesALittleLovin (user info) at 2005-01-03 18:04:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
And no more calls at 2:00 in the morning! Some people WORK you know.
Submitted by GodLovesALittleLovin (user info) at 2005-01-03 18:03:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Timeout.
How in the fuck did you know about my penis leprosy?
???
Jesus H. Christ on a deep-fried twinkie. Ok, ok, you win, just, just don't say ANYTHING about this again. Please. I could lose my job modeling condoms if someone found out!
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-01-03 18:00:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Or so you would like to believe, muncher of all that is bloated, pale, blonde, and named Helga. Your breath is like the stench of a thousand dead bodies left to marinate in an outhouse for a week during the summer. I know that because your giraffe told me so. Your inadequacies as a member of the human race are too much to even begin to contemplate, but I shall bravely continue to catalogue them anyway. Your peener fell off last week from the leprosy, but you will never admit it to anyone, because of the bigger, better, and generally plastic one that you had installed immediately. What you do not know is that even the plastic is quickly corroding away. You will not know this until it breaks while you are sodomizing your giraffe, gives her flesh-eating bacteria, and she dies. YOU ARE NO MATCH FOR MY PSYCHIC ABILITIES!!!
Submitted by GodLovesALittleLovin (user info) at 2005-01-03 17:47:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You are afraid of me.
Submitted by GodLovesALittleLovin (user info) at 2005-01-03 17:32:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
We can move this little shindig to wherever you like LP. It won't save you. I am the master of broken dreams and shattered lives. You point out the obvious woman, everyone knows that I like to chew on phlegm and the like, you have no ammunition. Thank god you don't know about the time I had sex with three guys in the bathroom of Wendy's, or, OR, the time I licked jello pudding from the nipples of the ladies man Wilt Chamberlain. Shit, you half-worm, half-mutated donkey of the ass of a three-headed Jimi Hendrix.
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-01-03 12:30:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
It just seemed appropriate. Sorry to have offended your delicate sensibilities.
Submitted by WhatTheHell (user info) at 2005-01-03 08:46:19 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
This "people pretending to be other people" thing is fucking lame.
Much like this post.
Submitted by knucklesnelson (user info) at 2005-01-03 07:42:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2005-01-03 02:50:28 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
I don't get it.
Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2005-01-03 02:36:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I don't think your trailer trashy mind could fathom anything other than the simplest of diagrams. You look like a big, fat, poor piece of shit. How's that working out for you?
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-01-03 02:31:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Really scraping the bottom of the insults barrel today, aren't you?
Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2005-01-03 02:27:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
- average IQ
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- A camel
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- You
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-01-03 02:20:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Yes, that would be correct, given that I'm not yet out of high school and I work in a theater.
Any other brilliant deductions?
Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2005-01-03 02:13:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
_____________________________ poverty line __________________________________
You
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-01-03 02:11:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
...which of course why it survived a tree falling on it.
Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2005-01-03 02:07:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I didn't know they made houses out of plastic. That is one frail, cheap imitation of a house you have there.
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-01-03 02:04:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Nurrr, that was a tool storage trailer that was crushed in the hurricane. If you look here http://www.ubersite.com/m/46779 you can see my actual house. So sorry to ruin that little idea of yours.
Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2005-01-03 01:59:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
http://stuff.ubersite.com/1096562362292527080/1/outsidemytrailer.JPG
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-01-03 01:41:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh, come on, was that the best you could come up with? That I live in a trailer park? At least come up with a believable insult.
Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2005-01-03 01:40:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Come on bitch, don't get too cocky, you live in a trailer park and the only reason why your hair is so long is because you can't afford the trip to a hairdresser or even to a WalMart for a pair of scissors.
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-01-03 01:34:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
What, hair that long, or hair that orange/on fire?
Submitted by FuckTheArmy (user info) at 2005-01-03 01:26:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I wish I had hair like that.
For real an' all.
Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2005-01-03 01:25:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I sense treachery
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-01-03 01:22:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm actually not obese or even fat, but if you mean 'I would pay to see a man who was somewhat malnourished running on fire', then yes, I agree.
Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2005-01-03 01:17:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Go ahead, just another fan post to add to the pile.
Submitted by Chinaski (user info) at 2005-01-03 01:16:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Exceedingly funny comment, Professor. I would pay homage to a forehead as broad as yours any day.
Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2005-01-03 01:13:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I would pay to see a man as obese as yourself running period, much less on fire.