God made the Tsunami so the little Yellow People could go to heaven too. (1339 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.17 on 30 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Rad (View user info) at 2005-01-08 04:12:57 EST
December 26, 2004
Samuel woke up to the sound of his upstairs neighbor's steps on the stairs outside his bedroom window. "Goddamn Bastard needs to fucking lose some weight", he thought to himself as he tried to go back to sleep, but it was useless. Samuel could never sleep when he woke with a hangover.
Christmas was spent in the normal fashion Samuel had grown accustomed.
Christmas Eve morning was spent on a bench in the mall near the lake, where he could watch the people hurriedly buy things for other people that they did not need so they could feel like they are important and loved. Husbands and boyfriends at Jared, purchasing useless rocks for the price of a vehicle; mothers and wives and girlfriends purchasing meaningless toys for the entertainment of the feebleminded. These were rituals that sickened Samuel, a traffic accident that you pass by slowly hoping to catch a glimpse of the horrifyingly terrific drama of the misery of human suffering.
That evening Samuel drank beer and wine until darkness evolved into light. He knew no more until Sunday.
Since the Layoff, there was not much to do from day to day. Money was not an issue. As a low level accountant with H&R Block, Samuel had the technical capability to budget and invest enough to where he only had to earn $12,000 per year to break even on his expenses. February, March, and April were set aside for work, and the Layoff occurred every year on May 1st. This was his ritual, the way he had grown accustomed.
"A killer Tsunami has wreaked havoc on countless beaches on the Indian Ocean, and new sources place the estimated dead at 12,000. Charitable organizations are now accepting money to assist in the rescue efforts." The news ticker seemed to have a calming effect on the headache Samuel was attempting to alleviate with an ample amount of Advil. "The number will probably rise in the next few weeks. Maybe I could volunteer to help out in the rescue efforts over there." For the first time in months, Samuel smiled.
December 28, 2004
Samuel had spent $2,600 on a ticket to Phuket. Sleep on the plane was sporadic, but the $5 cans of Tsingtao helped pass the time. The plane was mostly empty, save for about thirty young men and women, all sitting in the back of coach. One of the men actually had a backpacker guitar out strumming a familiar I-IV-V progression. "Fucking Kumbaiyah. These guys must be rescue volunteers." Samuel realized that he could not work with these people. He would have to do it alone. There would be mass confusion, no centralized organization yet to direct work efforts. The ability to slip in unnoticed would suit him just fine. It was the way, which he was accustomed.
January 2, 2005
It had been a week since Samuel had decided to contribute to the greater good of humanity, and even though his work was never ending, it was rewarding. He had discovered something within his character that he never knew existed; was afraid of what people would think if they knew what he was capable of. This was truly God's work he was doing, the thing he was doing for the poor people of Kamala Beach Village. He had, in the last five days, touched the lives of scores of people. Single-handedly, he had rescued them.
Most of the foreign rescue teams quit active search and rescue at dusk, and resumed in the morning. Samuel began his efforts two hours after dusk and finished up 2 hours before dawn. At dawn, he would go to the HQ tent, and stand in line for supplies necessary for this grim task all of these people faced. He got his machete the first day, along with the thirty or so hippies from the plane. Every other day the kit contained only the water pills, a first aid kit, a change of socks, and a recharged radio.
Tonight, Samuel noticed that there were more and more dead people, and less people in need of rescuing. In four hours he had only come across one person, a small child about seven years old about a mile inland from the beach. She was hiding under a corpse of a woman, who may have been her mother. Samuel reached out to her, and cooed. He found that with these small Asian children, guttural English did not work as well as gently making sounds that were childish and calming, thus gently cooing. The child reached out to him and took his hand, the tears of relief streaming from her eyes washing away the grime of the death she had witnessed in her short life. "The tragedy of what has happened has not set in with this one yet, as with all the others. The disjointedness from reality they will feel for the rest of their time on earth. The children who are now without parents or siblings, the elderly without children to take care of them. Husbands and wives without any family or friends, without each other. The real victims are those who survived, not those who died. Fuck the death toll, the tragedy is the survival toll."
Samuel led the girl to a washed out area, still three quarters of a mile inland, but the ocean licked at their feet nonetheless. Here began the cleansing ritual, a thing that he had done with all his victims he rescued. Metaphorical cleansing of the spirit, physical cleansing of the body. The girl waded out into the water, and when she knelt she could taste the salt of the ocean on her lips. Samuel took a rag out of his sack and washed her face until it was pure. "She will never have to know pain. She will never have to know suffering. She will be with her people now." Sam now turned the girl away from his body, and wrapped the rag around her neck. The girl was already drained from the trauma of the last week; she had no energy in which to fight her rescuer. Sam carefully tightened the cloth while lowering her head into the water. "She will know no disease. She will know no heartache." Sam counted to forty-five, then suddenly released the noose from his victim's neck. The girl gasped violently as the asphyxiation ended and her drowning began. "She will know no violence. She will be released."
Samuel had a new ritual. He would stay here until the work was done. It would be the way he would grow accustomed.
Afterword
In the weeks after the Tsunami of 2004, the death toll rose to over 200,000 people. Billions of dollars of support came in from the world community, making this tragedy more globalizing than the terrorist attacks of September 11, 2001. The greatest rescue effort known to man was made, saving more people than died in all the wars of the 20th century. No murders were reported in southeast Asia in January 2005. Everyone who died was the victim of the Tsunami. Everyone who survived was the victim of the Tsunami.
User Reviews
Submitted by ozzy (user info) at 2005-11-01 07:08:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Can't believe I hadn't seen this before.
Submitted by Dreg (user info) at 2005-11-01 07:07:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
can't believe I didn't rate this before. Really makes you think of all the commotion they had in N.O.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-11-01 06:58:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I LOVED THIS FUCKING STORY
Submitted by enraged_baboon (user info) at 2005-08-23 13:23:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
a
Submitted by podium (user info) at 2005-03-23 17:18:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-03-11 03:46:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
You wanna see bad, Paul?
Fully a third of the reviews on this post are mine.
And I liked this one too.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-03-02 05:30:16 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
How'd I miss this one?
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-02-22 07:35:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I really like the way he killed her! I wonder if you have ever done that in real life, you stud! You musta been a Navy Seal or something!
Submitted by williamson (user info) at 2005-01-27 05:45:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
20 minutes... alright
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-01-27 05:33:02 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Come on, this took me 20 fucking minutes to write. The least you could do is rate it! Am I an attention whore? Smack my ass and call me Lojope!
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-01-09 15:07:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-01-09 08:09:34 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
So you didn't get to the part where the dude kills the 7 year old Tsunami survivor?
Submitted by MrRottenTreats (user info) at 2005-01-09 08:06:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Tigre (user info) at 2005-01-08 07:57:36 (#)
Ranking: 2
what the hell man if they are comin at you , means they want somthin ,more better you look after them and care for them ,than they get on the street uh?
************************
I read that review 5 minutes ago..I'm still giggling like a child.
I didn't read the post though... Well I did a bit.
Submitted by MrRottenTreats (user info) at 2005-01-09 08:04:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
They didnt save THAT many people. And certainly not more than as you say "all the wars in the 20th century combined" 30 million peopled died as a result of WWII. So fuck off.
**************************
Actually is was more of around 55 million.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-01-09 01:18:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by cheruboo (user info) at 2005-01-08 15:43:56 (#)
Ranking: -2
They didnt save THAT many people. And certainly not more than as you say "all the wars in the 20th century combined" 30 million peopled died as a result of WWII. So fuck off.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Take into account the millions who are homeless and displaced, and the many millions more affected by the deaths and destruction, and the many more millions affected by the economic disasters you could come up with a very large number(possibly hundreds of millions of people being helped). Also, this was fiction, for the most part.
Submitted by cheruboo (user info) at 2005-01-08 15:43:56 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
They didnt save THAT many people. And certainly not more than as you say "all the wars in the 20th century combined" 30 million peopled died as a result of WWII. So fuck off.
Submitted by ACIDTRIP (user info) at 2005-01-08 09:16:59 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Well the title was good...
Submitted by Ainkara (user info) at 2005-01-08 08:46:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh my god... What the fuck?
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-01-08 08:27:27 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
9/11 is merely used as a scale to measure the response of the World. It was not a political statement.
Submitted by Lotus (user info) at 2005-01-08 08:14:57 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
"this tragedy more globalizing than the terrorist attacks of September 11, 2001."
Uhhh.. is that line for real? One was a natural disaster, the other a planned attack. One was in one city, the other in 11 countries. OF course it was more globalizing, Jesus. Americans. When will you ever get over your fucking selves?
Submitted by Tigre (user info) at 2005-01-08 07:57:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
what the hell man if they are comin at you , means they want somthin ,more better you look after them and care for them ,than they get on the street uh?
Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2005-01-08 07:57:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Shock.
Submitted by Stin (user info) at 2005-01-08 07:42:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-01-08 07:13:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You get a +2 for the title regardless of the content.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-01-08 06:46:28 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
WTF I'm not reading all that you fag.
Submitted by Bizdorph (user info) at 2005-01-08 05:55:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Uh...commentary?
Cool no matter what.
Submitted by Stabkill (user info) at 2005-01-08 04:34:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I'm going to have a tsunami party like they had a 9/12 party.
Submitted by Tastycat (user info) at 2005-01-08 04:33:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Fuck, if I ever wanted to kill someone, and the Tsunami didn't kill them or me, you can bet your ass they'd be dead now (assuming I lived in Thailand/Sri Lanka).
Submitted by CaptainAmik (user info) at 2005-01-08 04:21:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I know I shouldn't but, FM's post made me giggle like a school girl.
Submitted by fm (user info) at 2005-01-08 04:19:00 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
yeah, I used to want to visit thailand, but then I realized that's it's not what it used to be. It's kind of washed up.