Just Another Day: Part 1 (Long) (426 hits)
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Submitted by Kurbs <poetkurbs.at.aol.com> (View user info) at 2005-01-16 13:43:12 EST
This is a story I am currently writing, and is sadly not formatted for ubersite, sorry, I just want some feedback on what I've got so far...
Just Another Day
1
The deep buzz of the alarm and she opened her eyes and slammed the button so as not to wake up Sean. She squinted at those red number burning in her head. She steps down from bed, and feels a wet carpet squish between her toes.
"Sean, the dog did it AGAIN, get up you've got to clean this. That dumb dog needs to get trained".
"Ugh, honey this carpet was white before, I'll call the carpet cleaners later alright?"
"Okay Sean, but at least do something while the kids are at school, you lost your job a week ago and nothing has been done while I'm at work"
"Alright baby, I'm going to start the fence today, I hate walking this dog every day at the crack-ass of dawn."
2
Sarah got up, and put on her business suit, dark blue today, and went down to turn on the coffee. Opened the door to get the New York Times as usual. She sat down at her kitchen table and opened it up, glancing at the date, September 11, 2001. Turning to her next daily section, the weather, she discovered it was to be clear, and a balmy 73 degree high.
"Great, another beautiful day wasted on working in an office pushing papers. Lunch outside today I guess." She turned to check the business section, she always did this, wanting to be prepared for her usual day of her Business Consultant job with Primarch Decision Economics. She was really into a story and didn't notice her coffee bubbling over and burning.
"GOD DAMNIT! I don't even have time to make another pot! Jesus!" So she stormed out to her garage, tripping over their new Golden Retriever puppy, Buddy on the way. She went out to the garage slamming the door behind her, scaring Buddy again, making him leave another puddle on the kitchen floor. She got in her black Mercedes CLK320. She made it fine all the way along I-278 all the way into New York from her Bayonne, New Jersey home. Then she hit Route 27 and some idiot managed to block off two lanes with his crash, and only one was left for Sarah to get to work. She finally made it into New York City an hour later, and parked her car about a half mile from the World Trade Center, grabbed her dress shoes and put them in her purse, and put on her walking shoes to get there comfortably.
"Maybe I can grab a quick coffee at Starbucks, Dan won't mind."
3
Sean woke up to Buddy jumping up on him waggling his tail wildly and twisting around like a little worm. He finally got up, grabbed the leash and threw it onto the dog's collar. He went out to the kitchen and saw that Buddy didn't need to go to the bathroom anymore.
"Jesus Buddy, I should make you lick that clean." He took off the leash and pulled out the Lysol. All this time Buddy grabbed his rope toy and was swinging it around his head.
"You're gonna give yourself a concussion" he said laughing at the dog. "I guess you're not too bad after all, let's go for a walk." He put on the red leash again, and went out for a nice, long walk with his new puppy. He ran into his neighbor Courtney, who was watering her plants. Buddy was so excited to see a person he pulled away from Sean and splashed in the mud and jumped all over Courtney.
"Buddy! What's shakin' my main dog, besides your muddy-ass tail, I mean!"
"Hey Courtney, I'm really sorry about the dog he's a little hyper today"
"You mean every day? Yes, I know" She laughs
"Buddy can do the worst things and then make you laugh at him, he knows just how to get his butt out of trouble" He bent over and picked up the muddy dog.
"Well, I've got to go clean this dog up, then run out and get some wood, Sarah wants that new fence as soon as possible, downtime is unacceptable to business people."
"Well, Sean, you could just leave him in my yard, I've got the pool set up for the kids, and they're at school right now, so I could watch him for you, and give him a bath, I love this little dog." She proceeded to rub his ears and head wildly, which he loved, until he saw the pool, and bounced away.
"Alright, if you really want to, but if he gets to be too much, you've got my key"
"Yup, I do, so good luck with your fence... if you need any help give me a call, I'll call my boyfriend Matt, he's a pretty handy guy."
"Will do, but I better get crackin'! Bye!"
"Have fun!" As Courtney returned to her playing with the dog, rolling in the mud, and throwing some sticks from around her yard for him to chase, and destroy, he didn't get the concept of fetch.
Sean left and went to the Home Depot down the street with his blue Chevrolet Silverado to pick up some 4x4s, 2x4s, paneling, and lattice for his fencing. When he got there he went to the right and found about twelve different kinds of wood, so he chose to get oak because he knew it was a hard wood, and he got pressure treated so it wouldn't rot very quickly. He bought a few cans of brown paint so he could paint it later, he got a 3 inch paint brush, and a new table saw because Sarah wouldn't be able to tell the difference. As it turns out all this wouldn't fit in his truck so he called Courtney and had her call Matt. He showed up at Home Depot about twenty minutes later with his Ford F-350, with his rock music blaring, and after Sean gave him a "Friends don't let friends drive Fords,"Matt loaded the extra materials into his truck, and it was off to Sean's house.
4
As Sarah was walking to work, she gave a few bucks to each of the three homeless people, who knew her by name, before walking into Starbucks to get her coffee, with sugar and no cream. When she finally got to the door of the World Trade Center North Tower, she walked into the lobby and waved to Larry, the nice old security guard who had been there far longer then she, pr anyone she knew had. She got into the elevator with about eight other people, and pressed number eleven. She noticed that someone had pressed 97, and thanked god she wasn't that person. When she got to her office, her boss, Dan, joked around saying she was always late for work, but she knew he knew about traffic, and the necessity of coffee for this job. Plus, she was usually the first one in, and he was usually one of the last. She had some meetings with little companies in the area but found that her morning was mainly free. She went into her office, booted up her Sony Vaio computer, amazed at how much faster it was than her old Dell at home. She checked some e-mails, the usual junk, and a couple from her coworkers asking for prayers for family in surgery, etc. After about an hour of monotonous work she asked Dan if it was alright to leave, and he said as long as she was back in a half hour it would be cool. She glanced at the clock, it was only 8:15, so she figured she'd go out for breakfast. She called her friend Lauren on the thirtieth floor to see if she wanted to join her, and Lauren said she could. Sarah waited in the lobby and talked with Larry for a while, and also saw Frank, a consultant from one of the upper floor companies coming out of the elevators. She invited Frank to join in their little breakfast club, but he had to go back up in a minute he was just getting coffee from the Starbucks on the next block. Lauren finally came down but with about ten other women, so they had a bigger breakfast club than Sarah had thought. They went across the city to a small hole-in-the-wall breakfast diner with really good food.
5
Sean and Matt finally made it back to the house, and got to work on the fence. Sean started digging holes for the 4x4 posts, every five feet around his yard, which proved to be a lot harder then he expected. Matt was assigned to cutting the paneling into six foot heights, and 3 inch lengths, taking his time, and grateful for the new table-saw. Sean realized he'd need a cement mixer, so he went out to rent one, leaving Matt behind, and giving Matt an opportunity to go visit Courtney. Matt headed across the street, to Courtney's house, and heard laughing around back so he went to investigate, and found a very muddy Courtney playing with a very muddy little puppy.
He asked "Baby, whose dog did you steal?"
"OH! Matt you scared me" laughing, then "this is Sean and Sarah's dog, isn't he great?"
"Uh.. yeah, sure you could say that. If it's Sean's dog why is he over here?"
"Because he doesn't have a fence yet, that's why you're building one" Courtney said with that tone implying that Matt was, in fact, retarded.
"Oh, okay, well there's his truck he must have the mixer, I'll talk to you later babe"
"Bye baby, I love you!"
Matt walked back over to Sean's and helped him unload the mixer, and it was a lot heavier, and rustier, than he had thought it would be.
"Holy Crap Sean, what did you get? The solid steel one from the fifties?"
"This was the only one left, it's supposed to be a nice week, everyone's doing yard work, we can handle it, a little extra work never hurt anyone Matt, you should know that."
"Alright lets get back to work, I'm gonna go finish cutting those boards, you need to finish your holes"
"Okay, but cut the 4x4 posts to height first, I'll be needing those next."
Sean headed to the other side of his yard with the shovel, and Matt started cutting the four by fours. Sean was still digging when Matt had finished cutting all of the wood, so Sean told him to give them all three inch long points at the top, make the fence look a little better. Sean finally finished digging around 8:30 and started mixing his cement. He placed a 4x4 in a hole, then filled the hole with cement, with Matt's help holding it steady. After about twenty minutes of hole filling, maybe about ten holes, Matt noticed smoke coming from the New York direction.
"I wonder what's happening over there"
"Must be a huge fire or something" Sean muttered "Don't worry about it let's get back to work"
6
Sarah, Lauren and all their friends left their dress shoes with Larry, because he knew how hard it was to walk with them, and because they all trusted the old man who they had talked so much with. They all put on their walking shoes, and headed over to breakfast. By the time they got there it was 8:25 so they figured they had to eat quickly. They all ordered basically the same breakfast, eggs, bacon, toast, and a few got some ham, along with a few on the new 'Atkin's diet" who wouldn't get any toast. It was a nice day so they ate outside. Being women they naturally made small talk about husbands, kids, makeup, shoes, and every conceivable unimportant thing for about 20 minutes, overrunning Sarah's deadline to be back. It was a great day to be alive. Until Lauren jumped out of her chair, knocking it over.
"GOD! THAT PLANES GOING TO HIT OUR BUILDING!" Everyone outside of the restaurant jumped up, tables and chairs clattering and food dropping, glasses and plates breaking. They saw the plane go in and a giant orange flame come out the other side. A crash and the roar of the flames was all anyone could hear for a good, solid minute. People in shock started screaming, running either to the building or away from it. Suddenly the bright and blissful day became a black, bleak, and blurry nightmare. The women all ran towards their building, and as they went just about every fire engine, police car, and ambulance passed by them. People were shouting all kinds of ideas about what had happened, a mistake, an attack, electronic failure, depressed pilot, psychotic killer. It went on forever, but by the time they made it to the building only one was confirmed. A second plane hit the South Tower. People were covered in ash. The heat grew immensely. America was under attack and had no defense or obvious attacker.
--Kurbs
User Reviews
Submitted by MandaPanda (user info) at 2005-01-16 21:29:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You can't post two things in one day, honey.
I prefer this over the virgin one. :)
Submitted by vettesrule88 (user info) at 2005-01-16 21:05:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
why did i get pulled off the main page
Submitted by vettesrule88 (user info) at 2005-01-16 13:44:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
what the fuck, all my indentation disappeared
for the formatted version click here
http://www.xhaven.net/poetkurbs/Just%20Another%20Day.doc