The Ocean Bleeds (487 hits)
Category: Quotes & StoriesRating: 0.43 on 7 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Enter The Midnight (View user info) at 2005-01-24 21:44:12 EST
The tropical early morning breathed life, a warm life that escaped the frigid grip of the Arctic air that the States couldn't seem to shake. The sun was like gold that had been set afire, causing the colors of the island to become that much more vibrant and alive. Gentle waves lapped at the white sandy beaches that stretched for miles in any direction, and children, both native and tourist, played in the inviting waters, where the sunlight danced merrily on its surface. I moved away from the wooden deck that circled the pool where I had been standing, shielding my eyes from the low sun. Deciding to take a walk on the beach, I strolled down the steps to the sand, pausing to survey the landscape and the sea, but I halted complelely, noticing something odd.
The ocean seemed to be receding. Fish were flopping on the sand, and more and more sand was being exposed. Curious people around me on the crowded beach started fumbling for their video cameras, while some watched the ocean with worried expressions, trying to call their children back towards the buildings. Mostly unsuccessful, the frustrated parents ventured out onto the suddenly exposed sand where their children were. I glanced back towards the horizon, and a sick feeling hit me in the gut, like something awful was about to happen. It made me practically double over, and I sank to a slight crouch, still eyeing the sea. A few minutes passed, though to me, they seemed like hours.
The sick feeling wouldn't go away, and yet nothing appeared amiss--the children still played, the gulls were still pecking at the sand, and the sun was still shining. And yet, as I glanced back to the horizon another time, it had seemed to swell. The sick feeling hit me stronger this time, and I could only think of running. But why? Why did I feel so strange?
Several gentle waves had broken upon the distanced shoreline, and a slightly larger one seemed to be coming in from the horizon. It was moving fast--faster than a wave should move. Suddenly it hit me. This was no ordinary wave--it was something far worse. The natives and other tourists saw it too--the expressions of horror are something I will never forget as the entire beach turned and ran.
I tore back towards the deck as hard as I could go, the rushing, swirling roar behind me becoming louder and louder, and a black shadow loomed above, then crashed down. Like a shockwave from an explosion, a tremendous force erupted past me, seeming to suspend me in midair before it thrust me forward at unbelieveable speed, instantly reducing the deck to shreds. I saw other people go tumbling past in the water, some trying to cling to trees, posts, anything. Sailboats and surfboards were tossed like bath toys up and over the roofs of submerged buildings. The last thing I saw before the water took me under was the blazing, blinding light of the sun, glaring at me with sordid gaze, and then the world went brown and murky. My lungs began to burn as I was pushed into the crumbling hotel I was staying in. My fingers grasped at nothing but more water, and I searched desperately for some salvation. I was pushed through a busted window and out of the hotel, towards the street. Cars were being dragged down the street with the sheer power of the water--suddenly I was thrust headlong into a tree, almost knocked unconscious. I clung to it with my arms and legs, trying to shimmy up the narrow, slender trunk. I got my head above water for an instant, and breathed hard, before the rushing waters began to slow down. The forces on my body reversed direction, and the garbage dump created by the sudden wave began to drag towards the sea.
It is evening now. My paradise has become hell. I have seen the faces of those who survived--the anguish, the hurt, the loss that no one could comprehend. I still had my home in America. These people had lost everything, most things I could not fathom. Standing on the edge of the sea that took everything on the island, I watch the horizon again. The sun is setting, its light somber on the inky water. The water glows red, like blood. Today, the ocean bleeds with us.
User Reviews
Submitted by Sherman (user info) at 2005-02-24 01:25:45 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-01-27 23:45:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by Impassive-Digressive (user info) at 2005-01-24 21:54:02 (#)
Ranking: 0
I think you overdid the descriptive language in this piece. I can appreciate what you were trying to say, but I think the piece got a little bogged down. There was potential, but you need to declare a War on Adjectives and take some of those suckers out.
Submitted by MandaPanda (user info) at 2005-01-27 23:19:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I read this the other day. I'm not sure why I didn't rate it then.
But, I loved it!
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-01-25 12:44:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Not bad!
Submitted by DanielH (user info) at 2005-01-24 23:48:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Having not evacuated durig several hurricanes on the Gulf (and surviving three of them on the beach during hurricane parties) I can relate to this more than Yankees. Nicely written. Nature is a bitch, and she breathes through a bloody mouth.
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-01-24 23:28:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
This just wasn't that great.
(Couldn't help it.)
Submitted by Impassive-Digressive (user info) at 2005-01-24 21:54:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I think you overdid the descriptive language in this piece. I can appreciate what you were trying to say, but I think the piece got a little bogged down. There was potential, but you need to declare a War on Adjectives and take some of those suckers out.