Workplace Idiots. (671 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -0.56 on 10 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Thored (View user info) at 2005-01-26 20:56:14 EST
For all you kiddies out there, you don't want to be a cable guy. Jim Carey was the only cool cable guy ever. Anyways, I get to work, only to meet the stupidest pieces of shit I've ever met. His name is Tomas, and had an IQ rivaled by a brick. I think he's German, or Russian, or Chinese, or Arab, or a Heinz 57. Speaking of Heinz, what the fuck happened to the Steelers? Anyways, Lets be honest, this Tomas fuck, he was no Eric Rice, but he came close.
So we head out, hit a couple calls, get our day done with and whatnot until we get a call. Tomas needs some help down on James street, he says theres an outage. So we drive, halfway across the city to help this dumb fuck. When we get there, he realizes that it was a false alarm and that he read the meter wrong. Fine, it's his first day, he can have twenty minutes of my time. Just before I have time to pull out...
*SMASH* *CAR ALARM NOISES*
Tomas: "Oh! FUCK!" ( But because of his English it sounded like someone drowning )
Dad: You stupid... fucking... idiot!
Me: .....Wow.....
Several bystanders just look on with awe.
An Arab runs away screaming "PRAISE ALLAH!""
Apparently, Tomas, who will now be referred Dumb ass, tried to pull the Magnum P.I. move. You know, reverse at 50M.P.H and put the car into a spin. That works great in California, on a closed set, with no parked cars, and no ice in the road. It just so happens that when you try to pull a "180" on Ice, you may fuck up a couple parked cars. Try three, and a company van, and the ladder that came off the top and trough a windshield. Jim Carey couldn't dream of that kind of stupidity.
Thankfully, Tomas is now crippled for life and will never speak again. I convinced his girlfriend that his last wish while he was still able to speak was to allow him to watch me fuck her in front of him. Justice is served.
The cast of Magnum P.I. would cry.
User Reviews
Submitted by TheMidnight12AM (user info) at 2005-01-26 23:21:55 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Meh.
Submitted by Joemama (user info) at 2005-01-26 22:55:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Sassmasterr (user info) at 2005-01-26 22:28:29 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
"The Best of Magnum P.I." ???
isn't that an oxymoron?
Submitted by aphiz (user info) at 2005-01-26 22:17:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Hairsphincter (user info) at 2005-01-26 22:11:43 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
12689
Submitted by Impassive-Digressive (user info) at 2005-01-26 21:52:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
More people should listen to me and adopt my ideas: http://www.ubersite.com/m/43832
Submitted by Feijuada (user info) at 2005-01-26 21:41:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
"An Arab runs away screaming "PRAISE ALLAH!""
This got you a +1. You're lucky.
Submitted by Chronicles_of_College_Guy (user info) at 2005-01-26 21:06:00 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Gay.
Submitted by Thored (user info) at 2005-01-26 21:04:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Fuck, come on, hes got a moustache! A MOUSTACHE!
Submitted by BuckeyesTHEGAME (user info) at 2005-01-26 20:58:16 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
no
A -1 describes this perfectly: I've seen better.