UPI: Munkey Gets Raped (1361 hits)
Category: RomanceRating: 0.96 on 42 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Kazzerax (View user info) at 2005-01-26 22:12:04 EST
<begin rape>
Last night, as I was playing Halo 2, I decided that I needed to get some. I paged through my little black book of hookups, and found nothing. Depressed, I decided to go to my childhood hangout: The Mall.
I had hoped to find a 13 year old to put the moves on, but I was unsuccessful. Desperate, I turned to the Emo/Goth chicks, who were always depressed. Which always meant they were ready for a good lay. I went outside where most of them cry, and to my surprise, there was only one Emo guy out there, and a woman with long, curly hair.
I instantly recognized her as Munkeypants from Ubersite.
I had to figure a way to let her know that I was from Ubersite too. I calmly walked up to her and said "Hey. Get any more brownies from Rico?"
She looked at me quizzically and said: "-2 DIE ASSHOLE!" As she ran away. I took off after her, knowing that I was about to commit Uber rape. Finally, I was about to get some from the legendary Munkeypants.
She jumped in her Jeep Wrangler and I jumped into my school bus, and in no less than five minutes, we were in a high-speed car chase. She had Hells bells blaring from her stereo, and I was singing "The Wheels On The Bus Go Round And Round." She was driving erratically, her "-2 Die" bumper sticker taunting me. I want some naked Munkey ass god damn it!
I sped up to her and forced her into the breakdown lane, where I pinned her Jeep against the guardrail and the side of my school bus. I got out of the bus and walked over to the driver's side. Sure enough, she was passed out in the bucket seat, her mouth gaping open, and "Hells Bells" still blaring from the radio.
I picked her up out of the Jeep and took her into the bus, where I dressed her like a catholic schoolgirl.
She opened her eyes and saw where she was, how she was dressed, and the bottle of hot fudge I was pouring onto her pooper. She knew what was happening.
"AH! I'll recite some poetry if you go through with it!"
With that, I put duct tape over her mouth, and then hot fudged her pooper. Upon completion, I brushed her hair for a while, answered questions about why the sky is blue, and then placed her back in her Jeep where she drove home.
In my pocket I found her number that she secretly placed while I wasn't looking.
<end rape>
There you have it, Uberknights. Who raped Munkey?
catholic_schoolgirl.psd (734 kB) [application/octet-stream]
User Reviews
Submitted by Vomit (user info) at 2005-02-03 19:22:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by strider (user info) at 2005-01-31 21:57:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2005-01-27 11:27:37 (#)
Ranking: 0
I opened that PSD in Photoshop (Jpeg next time) and turned off the layer for Munkeys face.
I gotta say that broad whos body you used was FUGLY!
==============
VERY true dat!
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2005-01-31 21:26:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
you are one weird little fucker
Submitted by maiorano84 (user info) at 2005-01-30 16:10:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Rate.
Submitted by Lechuga (user info) at 2005-01-29 20:03:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I do not have anal warts, those were given to you by Maiorano.
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-01-29 04:19:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
great. that means along with all of my problems i can now add
anal warts to my list.
Submitted by Kazzerax (user info) at 2005-01-29 03:47:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Alright guys, it was...
Dun dun dun....
no really, next time....
got you again
LECHUGA
Submitted by Kazzerax (user info) at 2005-01-28 18:34:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
A photoshop edited file.
Submitted by drfeggphd (user info) at 2005-01-28 16:41:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
it has to be someone smart, to explain why the sky is blue.
it has to be someone nice, to brush her hair and remember to use some hot fudge.
i'm nice and smart, but the perpetrator would have her number in his pocket, and since due to some kind of blackout i don't remember the other night very well and can't find my pants at all, this is unverifiable.
so i will guess: WhatTheHell.
Submitted by Electro (user info) at 2005-01-28 16:19:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
question...
What the fuck is a PSD file?
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2005-01-27 17:17:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
If this is a post about 'rape', than the subject better be 'lojope', got it dumbass?
Submitted by Kazzerax (user info) at 2005-01-27 17:06:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Guys, vote, when someone gets it right, I'll say who it is.
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-01-27 16:57:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
well can you clue *me* in? because i have no idea!!!
Submitted by Lechuga (user info) at 2005-01-27 16:37:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by maiorano84 (user info) at 2005-01-27 13:49:45 (#)
Ranking: 2
I know, but I am not at liberty to say.....
Submitted by DarthFaded (user info) at 2005-01-27 14:45:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
For gods sake learn how to export to a fucking Jpg...
but +2 for sex +2 for Munkey, -2 for lack of PS skillzzzzzzz.......
Submitted by maiorano84 (user info) at 2005-01-27 13:49:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I know, but I am not at liberty to say.....
Submitted by MrRottenTreats (user info) at 2005-01-27 13:48:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Only idiots would attach a photoshop file.
Only idiots would +2 this.
That makes me an idiot.
Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2005-01-27 12:32:45 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-01-27 12:17:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
it better be somebody good. if i'm going to be anally violated at least
dont make it PFF or Koolmang.
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-01-27 12:16:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
you were going to get a -2 but this was a little funny.
Geez, i dont DARE open that pic!
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2005-01-27 11:27:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I opened that PSD in Photoshop (Jpeg next time) and turned off the layer for Munkeys face.
I gotta say that broad whos body you used was FUGLY!
Submitted by Totally_useless (user info) at 2005-01-27 09:07:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh, and, by the way, it was IHAKF that raped munkeypants. Eeeeeew.
Submitted by Totally_useless (user info) at 2005-01-27 09:00:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/57837
The true Method REVEALED!
+2 for anything with munkey and sex.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-01-27 08:15:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
You're all nincompoops.
Submitted by Wazza (user info) at 2005-01-27 05:05:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
what the hell man if they are comin at you ,means they want somthin,more better you look after them and care for them,than they get on the street uh?
I'm just sittin here getting my dick sucked by the most beautifull girl in the world!
Submitted by Siren (user info) at 2005-01-27 05:03:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Well, this was just funny now wasn't it?
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2005-01-27 05:00:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I'm gonna beat the fuck out of your mom.
Submitted by Mitchapalooza (user info) at 2005-01-27 04:48:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm not Method, but I play one on TV.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-01-27 03:49:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm a method alter as well.
Submitted by Kent_Weirdo (user info) at 2005-01-27 03:41:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Dude, I am totally one of Method's alters.
Submitted by mazman23 (user info) at 2005-01-26 23:33:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I got it....it is Vomit
Submitted by Val (user info) at 2005-01-26 23:05:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-01-26 22:25:20 (#)
Ranking: 0
WHY DOES EVERYONE THINK I'M BEHIND EVERY @$*&)(@#$)(*& ALTER ON THIS SITE??
=============================================================================
...because you are???
Call me, George. I'll pay you $100 to drive me to NH on the 2nd or 3rd. I'll also pay for gas. And I'll give you a foot massage. And a manicure. I know you like that shit.
Seriously though... drive me?
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2005-01-26 22:56:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
It WAS JMG114
Submitted by Lechuga (user info) at 2005-01-26 22:40:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Method, Method, so angry! Calm, jungle friend, and have some Tea by the fire with me!
*pat pat*
Submitted by Kazzerax (user info) at 2005-01-26 22:30:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'M NOT A FUCKING ALTER ASSCLOWN!
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-01-26 22:25:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
WHY DOES EVERYONE THINK I'M BEHIND EVERY @$*&)(@#$)(*& ALTER ON THIS SITE??
Submitted by Lechuga (user info) at 2005-01-26 22:24:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Come on, this has to be either Apollo or Method.
Submitted by DonkeyOnTheEdge (user info) at 2005-01-26 22:22:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
<begin masturbation>
<end masturbation>
Duration, 1.3 seconds.
Submitted by Feijuada (user info) at 2005-01-26 22:18:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
It sounds like a Japanese person's fantasy, except that the Japanese are already playing Halo 5.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-01-26 22:17:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Y HALO THAR BUTTSECKS?
Submitted by GodLovesALittleLovin (user info) at 2005-01-26 22:16:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Poop to face@
Submitted by Kazzerax (user info) at 2005-01-26 22:15:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
open picture in paint. Rapist screwed up in photoshop.