Asian Sex Dwarf - BBQ! (3343 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.63 on 25 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by The Lone Stranger (View user info) at 2005-01-27 15:07:25 EST
Part 1: http://www.ubersite.com/m/51166
Part 2: http://www.ubersite.com/m/51366
Part 3: http://www.ubersite.com/m/51911
Part 4: http://www.ubersite.com/m/53896
Part 5: Right heeya!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
It was a typical Saturday afternoon.
I was on the patio, butt-ass nekked, grilling up some wieners, while listening to the Village People's greatest hits.
What? I love the feel of hot juicy wieners in my mouth. Doesn't everyone? And there is something primal about grilling up some man meat in the buff.
I had just slid another wiener out of my inny, placed it on the grill, and hung the tongs back on my outy, when I heard it.
"OOOHIIOOOO!"
"Aaaw fuck me! I said in exasperation. I really don't mind being molested. It's just - I was really looking forward to some hot juicy wiener action.
Out of my kitchen she strutted, wearing nothing but pink panties with little red firetrucks all over them.
"Firetruck Panties! WooOOOOoooOOoooOOOoo!! DING DING DING!!" She exclaimed, emulating a siren in her tiny tenor tone.
Still sounding off as a siren (an oh-so-sexy siren!), she began marching circles around the grill. With each pass, she plucked a wiener off the grill and flung it at me, hitting my squarely in the chest, all the while staring me in the eyes, as if daring me to challenge her dominance.
It went something like this: WooOOOOOoooOOooOOOoo - grab - fling - splat - repeat.
By the time she had finished flinging my wieners at me, my chest hair was coated in thick greasy wiener sauce.
It was bliss!
She then pounced on me, knocking me to my back, lying on the pavement. Sitting atop me, she started to run her fingers through my sparse chest hair.
"oooOOOOooo! Black Forest!"
Her eyes got real big, and with a crazed mischievous look, she whispered "Let's start a fire!"
She got up and grabbed the lighter fluid off the grill. Standing above me, wiggling her ass to the tune of "Disco Inferno", she doused my chest with lighter fluid, struck a match, and dropped it.
My chest erupted into a raging inferno that smelt of charred hair and wiener grease.
I was so turned on!
"It's a five-alarmer!" she exclaimed, "Put it out! Put it out!"
She turned around and squatting down, unleashed a stream of Asian Sex Dwarf urine on my chest. It smelled like Honey Smacks. Dig'Em!
The fire doused, she wiped the sweat from her brow. She leaned down and lifted my ass. There was a angry red burn scar reading ASD.
Seeing that everything was in order, she looked at me and said, "Don't forget - I OWN you."
And with that, my Super-Sexy Sadistic Siamese Pseudo-Siren Succubus leapt back into my house and disappeared.
How's that for alliteration, bitches?
User Reviews
Submitted by the_lone_stranger (user info) at 2006-06-22 22:53:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
<hands Fungah a kleenex> There, there
Submitted by Fungah (user info) at 2006-06-22 22:32:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This was beautiful. It brought tears to my eyes.
Submitted by the_lone_stranger (user info) at 2006-06-22 22:25:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Don't buy one unless you are sure you can handle one. Mine is quite a handful.
Submitted by Spacegrass (user info) at 2006-06-21 16:51:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
<incredibly blasphemous expletive deleted>
So what I was TRYING to say, is that when I first read this, the ad at the bottom was a link advertising ASD something or other. I didn't click the link, but I can only assume it was selling Asian Sex Dwarves!
Submitted by Spacegrass (user info) at 2006-06-21 16:49:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
AHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Submitted by the_lone_stranger (user info) at 2006-02-25 23:05:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
ASD rocks my world.
Submitted by the_lone_stranger (user info) at 2006-02-23 00:01:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Yeah, entertainment. Tool.
Submitted by the_lone_stranger (user info) at 2006-02-13 13:42:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
OHIO!
Submitted by morontian (user info) at 2005-08-28 10:00:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
AAAAHAHAHAHA
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2005-08-28 09:49:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I still love these fucking things....
Submitted by the_lone_stranger (user info) at 2005-08-28 09:33:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Stabkill is a prick.
Submitted by Stabkill (user info) at 2005-05-18 11:54:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Awww. It is just a website, right? This is entertainment.
Submitted by HZRD (user info) at 2005-03-02 23:07:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
awww... just one more?
Submitted by the_lone_stranger (user info) at 2005-02-03 18:56:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I dunno how much longer I can keep up this nonsense.
Submitted by HZRD (user info) at 2005-02-03 15:03:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"She turned around and squatting down, unleashed a stream of Asian Sex Dwarf urine on my chest. It smelled like Honey Smacks. Dig'Em!"
This shit keeps getting better! mormormormormormor
Submitted by the_lone_stranger (user info) at 2005-01-27 22:42:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I guess Asian Sex Dwarves just aren't "cool" anymore.
Submitted by the_lone_stranger (user info) at 2005-01-27 22:12:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
A "What the?" +2 works for me.
Submitted by Impassive-Digressive (user info) at 2005-01-27 19:09:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
What the?
Submitted by MandaPanda (user info) at 2005-01-27 18:22:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by the_lone_stranger (user info) at 2005-01-27 17:52:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Hmmmm. LSD, eh? A Latina Sex Dwarf sounds good.
Submitted by Girlwithaclue (user info) at 2005-01-27 17:41:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This series cracks me up
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2005-01-27 17:12:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
OHIIIIIIIIO!
Submitted by the_lone_stranger (user info) at 2005-01-27 16:58:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
There was no LSD involved in the writing of this post.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2005-01-27 15:26:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
wow.
you sure it said "ASD" and not "LSD"??
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2005-01-27 15:10:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
I need an ASD.