Bejesus! Begarrah! A Leprechaun! (995 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.41 on 19 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Driving Miss Draqus (View user info) at 2005-01-31 16:09:17 EST
I'm always fascinated by people from America and elsewhere who go out of their way to link their ancestral identities with Ireland.
"Yes, my great-grandmother's dog's mother was an irish wolfhound (the father was a terrier). That makes me practically a native!"
Being from Ireland, I find it fascinating that people want to come from this hole at all. Don't get me wrong, it is a beautiful country with many stunning places to see, and plenty of quaint "oirish" things like thatched roof pubs an' all, don'tcherknow, but I just can't get the obsession with being Irish.
If I had a punt (Irish pound) for every time I saw a tourist over trying to find their great-great-great uncle's ancestors, who stayed while great-great-grandmother Nora moved away during the Potato Famine, I would be as poor as fuck (everyone uses euros these days...) For fuck's sake, my brother was accosted once by Japanese tourists eager to take his picture because his ginger hair, and the fact that he was fishing at the time, convinced them that he was a leprechaun.
I'm allowed to hate this place because I live here; so I do. I hate it for the often shitty weather, and the fact that it struggles desperately to retain its own cultural identity as everyone else mistakenly erodes it, and the terrorists and crappy politicians and divisions and hatred. But I also love with equal measure, because I happen to think that people from Ireland are some of the nicest and most genial people around.
As far as I'm concerned, being Irish means more than having a distant ancestor who once shat on imported Irish soil. It means actually living there, for one, and appreciating proper Guiness, in the Temple Bar in Dublin, where it's best (the further from Dublin you go, the worse Guiness gets; this is a fact: it loses flavour during the transport and never comes out as well on the other side; I, however, personally like to believe that the magic leaks away, or some shit), and seeing the Ring of Kerry on a good day, and chasing the end of a rainbow when you're young to see if that wee bastard leprechaun will actually be there, this time. Amongst others.
I really want to know from people: why does being Irish hold such an attraction to an outsider? What is the attraction of the lucky clover and the Emerald Isle?
User Reviews
Submitted by Chillax (user info) at 2005-05-27 13:02:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I already do - you are the person I hate most in this world.
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2005-05-26 13:04:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I've sobered up since lastnight.
But you still suck.
AHAHHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHAHAHAHHAHHAH
HATE ME BITCH!
Submitted by shileaux (user info) at 2005-03-13 17:35:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
old post, new comment -- you link whore'res suck ...
Guiness is so nasty, it really shud be poured back in the horse -- I think it is quite magical that you can bottle and sell so much horse piss world 'round!
one of my friends is an Irish lad, straight from the mommy-land 'erself ... and he drinks the shit and bitches at the bartender for not pouring a pint right -- who cares how much head the bastid pint has.. it all tastes like the same amount of ass!
Now it was _funny_ the other day, when I drank the last half of his Guiness in one shot, cuz I really wanted to leave the pub and he was taking too long "enjoying" his cup o' horse piss ... you shudda seen his eyes -- not only do I _hate_ the shit, but I had just dranken _HIS GUINESS_ ... oh well .. sorry ol' sod!
I guess its all cuz I'm half Scottish and you Irish blokes oughta be shot where ya stand .. (if I really believed that, I'd care more that I'm 101% Canadian .. pass the local horse piss, its all about Molson .. or some shit!)
Have a nice day!
Submitted by Girlwithaclue (user info) at 2005-03-10 16:53:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Dont make me break out me shalalee...
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2005-03-10 16:42:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
As a person of mostly Scottish anscestry, I'm obligated to hate your dirty Irish ass.
Good post though, well done.
Submitted by EbolaMay (user info) at 2005-03-10 16:36:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I'm half Irish, though I've never been there. My middle name is my mother's maiden name: McInerney. Know any McInerney's over there? Apparantly they're from someplace called County Clare.
Like I said, I've never been there, and the fact that my mother is pure 100% Irish by blood was never an issue. We were just Americans first, then Texans.
The only thing; her being Irish and all, she went to Catholic schools, and of course became a non-believer. I've never been religious as a result.
Does this mean I'm going to hell?
Submitted by Envenom (user info) at 2005-03-10 16:26:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ok, you're right, so what's your point?
Submitted by Adereterial (user info) at 2005-02-01 05:03:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Mmmmmmmm Guinness...
Christ I want a Guinness... Unfortunately the closest thing I can get to a pint right now is either that picture or the inflatable pint Guinness sent me a couple of years back for St. Paddys day.
My grandfather is Irish, from Dublin... unusually he's protestant.
My mother-in-law to be is also Irish...
What exactly does this make me?
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2005-02-01 04:37:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Well speaking as a lad who is from Liverpool (where do you think the scouse accent comes from??) and whose grandad is from county cork and whose surname is Keogh I can quite happily say I am quite happily english.
now go and dig me a road or summit.
;-)
Submitted by Merlina (user info) at 2005-02-01 04:25:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ah-fucking-men
Am Irish too and it drives me INSANE. I'm living in London now and every time I meet people they ALWAYS say "oh you're from Dublin? I'm part Irish y'know"
AAAAGHHHHHHHH eejits...
and mikethescottish. we're going to WIN darlin'..
Submitted by stardamage (user info) at 2005-01-31 16:55:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
The below comment made me laugh in much the same way.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2005-01-31 16:53:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2005-01-31 16:49:52 (#)
Ranking: 2
This made me giggle like a japanese schoolgirl seconds before she takes a load in the face from a badly-dressed businessman.
--
Outrageous! Scandalous! Utterly hilarious!
You really are filthy, after all.
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2005-01-31 16:49:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This made me giggle like a japanese schoolgirl seconds before she takes a load in the face from a badly-dressed businessman.
Submitted by screamfeeder (user info) at 2005-01-31 16:24:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
My dad is from Dublin, does that count?
Ahh probably not.
Submitted by mikethescottish (user info) at 2005-01-31 16:24:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Fair play, but you lot are still gonna get whupped in the 6 Nations.
Submitted by Davros (user info) at 2005-01-31 16:18:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I quite liked this.
I have some Irish heritage, but don't play on it.
Unless it is as an excuse to go out and get drunk.
-Dave
Submitted by Vomit (user info) at 2005-01-31 16:15:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I think my left nut is Irish.
Submitted by TheSpook (user info) at 2005-01-31 16:13:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
mmmm...Guinness
Submitted by Sassmasterr (user info) at 2005-01-31 16:13:56 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
i've never known anyone that was claimed to be irish (the partial way that you described). ever. i'm 5% irish. woo!