Jeremy (891 hits)
Category: NoneLabels: Untruth
Rating: 1.72 on 42 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Snark << snarkk.at.gmail.com (View user info) at 2005-02-02 20:32:44 EST
Jeremy
The first punch catches him unprepared and he falls to his knees on the soft brown autumn-killed grass of the school yard, hands clasped to his stomach, lungs straining to reclaim the crisp fall air.
"Fuckin Goof!"
He wants to retaliate but he can't breath and he knows it wouldn't do any good anyways. There are too many of them. They're standing around him in a ring and waiting for an excuse to beat him en masse.
He can feel how much they want to hurt him, but he knows they can't, at least not yet. There are rules to a school yard beating, traditions to adhere to. They have enough to keep him down but he has to give them an excuse before they can really unleash on him.
He may only be 12 years old but he's not stupid. He understands the shared hatred on their faces. He knows his history with them has been erased by what he's done. Past friendships mean nothing now and standing up for himself will mean even less, so he remains silent and wonders how bad things will get before they leave him.
The next punch glances off the side of his head and the world slips sideways for a moment. Tears born from dead friendships spring to his eyes and he keeps his head bowed towards the ground. He knows that if his classmates see them it will be something akin to dumping blood into a pool of sharks. He knows that weakness is as disastrous as defiance when you're the only Beta in a gang of Alpha's.
"It was you wasn't it!"
He doesn't answer. He doesn't move. They're going to do what they're going to do and he knows his only option is to remain silent. Anything else would invite disaster. Anything else would only fuel their rage. The rage he created. The rage he deserves and yet does not.
"Hit him again! Kick him!"
He winces despite himself then glances sideways and up to confirm his suspicions.
The short red haired boy he knows as Brent returns his gaze fiercely. No hint of sympathy or apology for his words shows itself on his freckled face. No trace of the fact they were best friends less than an hour earlier sneaks past the malice in his eyes.
He pulls his view from the unbearable heat of the freckled sneer, back to the matted brown grass, and silently wishes for the blows to start coming. Physical abuse he thinks he can handle. He guesses that kicks and punches and the taste of his own blood are nothing compared to the heat of their loathing. The pain from a fist to the head must be tiny in comparison to the hateful wordless accusation on the face of every friend he has in the world.
He knows they hate him like no other. They hate him almost as much as he hates himself.
"Why'd you do it man? Why'd you rat him out? I thought you were cool"
He doesn't answer because he doesn't know how.
His thoughts are mature but his vocabulary is not. He has wisdom beyond his years but lacks the life experience necessary to guide it, to see beyond the rules of the school yard.
He wants to tell them that he did it for them. He wants them to see that he was trying to save their innocence, to save them from themselves and the intruder in their midst.
He can't understand how or why they saw Davie as a hero when all he saw was a messed up kid making all the wrong choices. He can't comprehend why no one else felt the same increasing dismay as the runaway appeared amongst them during their breaks, and plied them with lies about the freedom of his rule free life, and grand adventures while stealing to survive.
He can remember clearly the raw hard feeling of the knot in his gut as he watched the faces of his brothers and sisters, eerily expressionless, eyes wide and mouths slack in rapt attention. He can hear how they giggled occasionally as the boy told them of the houses he'd broken into and the supposed riches he'd plundered. He recalls how the giggling turned to laughter as Davie pranced around like a drunk and mimicked the messages he'd left the absent families with spray paint and urine.
Tokens of appreciation for an unlocked door or window left ajar.
He had done his duty well at the beginning. He'd held his tongue and kept his dislike of the boy to himself. He'd been content to let Davies fetid influence wash over them in the hope it would pass like a foul wind.
It wasn't until the day that Davie convinced some of the older boys to join him in his next break and enter that he considered doing the unthinkable. It wasn't until he found out that Davies foster parents were frantically combing the city looking for him that he could see himself going to the principal's office.
Later that same day he'd been sitting on a bench in the school yard and contemplating his choices when he'd heard one of the boys tell Davie that he "Wouldn't Narc" but that he knew his foster parents and they were good people.
It was the knowledge that the boy didn't have to be doing what he was that steeled his resolve. It was the undeniable reality that the darkness that had settled over his friends was the result of a sick kid's whim that sent him to the principal.
He'd gone knowing the consequences yet completely unprepared for them. Just as he is completely unprepared for the foot that now smashes into his face, breaking his nose and splitting his lips.
"Fucking Rat!"
Something about the force of the words against his ears tells him that the crowd has somehow found its excuse to let loose. He cries out despite himself and moves to curl into a ball but a well placed blow, from a girls pointed shoe, hits him perfectly between the legs and his world explodes into a white hot pain that he never knew existed.
The beating lasts for a short eternity. He can't tell how long for sure. All he knows is the coppery taste of his own blood and the throbbing hellfire in his balls and belly.
For a moment he hates them all but he's too young to truly understand the word and it's simply not a part of his nature so he tries to focus on something that is.
Forgiveness.
Long after the teacher's break up the mob he will sit in front of the principle again.
He'll remain steadfast and refuse to name anyone as a conspirator. He'll protect his friends just as he felt he was doing with his first visit.
He'll genuinely forgive them and ask for none for himself.
He'll remain among them as a Pariah, content to lean against the knowledge that he did what he did because he believed it was righteous.
Months later, when he runs into Brent in the washroom and his once best friend smiles and offer's him a piece of gum from a shaking hand, he'll know one of the happiest days of his young life.
He'll turn to leave the bathroom, hopeful and joyful and completely unaware of the gun his old friend stole from his father.
He'll never see it pointed at his back as he walks towards the bathroom door, eyes bright and smile wide.
He won't feel the bullet smash through the heart his mother always told him was too big for his chest.
He'll pass from here to the hereafter as so many unsung heroes do and the world will go on.
The world will go on but the schoolyard will never be the same.
User Reviews
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2005-03-24 05:50:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2005-02-02 22:23:52 (#)
Ranking: 0
Dammit Williamson
-------------------
I didn't actually read this when I said that, I was just looking for the PJ lyrics.
This also was bloody awesome. I am fast becoming a Snark fan.
Queries - the guy is talking about American History X I think
And yes, the kid shot himself in the Jeremy video
Jeremy spoke in class today
try to erase THIS from the blackboard etc.
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-02-05 21:07:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2005-02-02 22:25:04 (#)
Ranking: 2
Snark = Auto Respect.
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-02-05 21:06:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2005-02-02 20:59:20 (#)
Ranking: 0
Hahaha I was just thinking of a title and couldn't think of one so I picked the first one that came to mind.
Now I know where it came from.
I shoulda had this Jeremy kill the class like in the video.
-------------
i thought he shot himself?
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2005-02-05 20:33:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
What Movie?
Give me a call.
Submitted by mo (user info) at 2005-02-04 20:28:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hey Snark, that was a great story, I also recognised that ending, that was a really good movie. I will converse with you later. We may go to Woody's if your interested.
Mo
Submitted by Tickle (user info) at 2005-02-04 15:43:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This is good. I know the part that it is "loosely" based on, I recognised it right away. I like the dramatization with the killing in the end.
Submitted by Timmah (user info) at 2005-02-03 19:38:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
grr wish I could write like this.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/58512 new piece. Not really been read, would appreciate feedback.
Submitted by Jo_of_the_golden_P (user info) at 2005-02-03 19:05:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You make it easy to love you.
Let's do it. like, now.
Submitted by mles76 (user info) at 2005-02-03 18:04:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by AshK (user info) at 2005-02-03 17:39:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2005-02-02 21:28:18 (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh Oh,
I pissed of Ashk somehow.
--------------------------------------------------------------
I just didn't have the mental capacity to make a comment right then.
Orrrrrrrrrrr....
I am on strike until you post another Necro.
You decide.
*insert evil laugh here*
Submitted by Xena (user info) at 2005-02-03 17:35:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I thought this post was great...it made me ache a little
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2005-02-03 11:40:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Schlongy,
I liked it much better when we didn't exist to each other. What say we go back to that?
Apollo,
Pick up a Newspaper sometime.
Submitted by wookie (user info) at 2005-02-03 09:27:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-02-03 09:20:29 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Why didn't they just shoot him outside?
Submitted by Jay_Bassman (user info) at 2005-02-03 08:16:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
This was fantastic up until the gun. Then it all went horribly pear-shaped.
Oh, and from one Australian to another Impassive... "grouse" should be used more often.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2005-02-03 08:01:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
So they went from calling his a 'goof' to shooting him.
Can't buy into that I am sorry.
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2005-02-03 07:25:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
That Dirty Frank was a baaaaad mother *SHUT YOUR MOUTH!*
Submitted by SilvrWolf (user info) at 2005-02-03 01:02:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
good post
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2005-02-03 00:37:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Benny,
Pretty loosely... as in no one ever got shot...
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2005-02-03 00:36:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Shitfuck,
I would definitely hook up with you for some self abuse.
I'll probably be embarrased the by answer to this but, what is Shambala?
I've been to Edgefest if you can call that an outdoor festival...
Is Shambala the thing in Alberta that's kind of like Burning Man?
Submitted by Jaineix (user info) at 2005-02-02 23:33:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Sassmasterr (user info) at 2005-02-02 23:27:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
some dude already beat me to the "jeremy" - pearl jam lyrics
Submitted by Benny (user info) at 2005-02-02 22:30:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
That Brent was certainly a nasty little turd. How loosely was this based on what happened at your school?
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2005-02-02 22:25:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Snark = Auto Respect.
I'm going to be at Shambala this year, if you're in to outdoor festivals--let's get stoned.
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2005-02-02 22:23:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Dammit Williamson
Submitted by NoahsArk (user info) at 2005-02-02 22:21:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
The ending didnt do it for me. Great up until there, but the ending was flat.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2005-02-02 21:28:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh Oh,
I pissed of Ashk somehow.
Submitted by AshK (user info) at 2005-02-02 21:26:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2005-02-02 21:12:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
It's a shame I picked that name. This is based loosely on something that happened at school when I was a kid.
Submitted by bush_for_god (user info) at 2005-02-02 21:10:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
very good
Submitted by spedmonkey (user info) at 2005-02-02 21:10:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Yeah, the whole time I was reading, I thought this might have been based on Pearl Jam. Whatever.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2005-02-02 21:00:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Ahhhhh,
Got it Impassive, I'll add it to my list of "Annoy the coworkers" words!!!
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2005-02-02 20:59:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Hahaha I was just thinking of a title and couldn't think of one so I picked the first one that came to mind.
Now I know where it came from.
I shoulda had this Jeremy kill the class like in the video.
Submitted by Impassive-Digressive (user info) at 2005-02-02 20:58:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
'Grouse' is late 80's/early 90's Aussie slang for 'cool/awesome/ace/rad/spiffy'. It doesn't get much use anymore, unfortunately.
Submitted by williamson (user info) at 2005-02-02 20:56:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
At home, drawing pictures of mountain tops
With him on top lemin yellow sun, arms raised in a v
And the dead lay in pools of maroon below
Daddy didn't give attention
Oh, to the fact that mommy didn't care
King jeremy the wicked...oh, ruled his world...
Jeremy spoke in class today... (2x)
Clearly I remember pickin' on the boy
Seemed a harmless little fuck
Ooh, but we unleashed a lion...
Gnashed his teeth and bit the recess lady's breast...
How can I forget?
And he hit me with a surprise left
My jaw left hurtin'...ooh, dropped wide open
Just like the day...oh, like the day I heard
Daddy didn't give affection, no...
And the boy was something that mommy wouldn't wear
King jeremy the wicked...oh, ruled his world
Jeremy spoke in class today... (3x)
Woo... (14x)
Try to forget this...try to forget this...
Try to erase this...try to erase this...
]from the blackboard...
Jeremy spoke in class today... (2x)
Jeremy spoke in, spoke in... (2x)
Jeremy spoke in class today...
Woo... (29x)
Woooooohhh...spoke in, spoke in...
Woooooohhh...uh huh, uh huh...
Submitted by GodLovesALittleLovin (user info) at 2005-02-02 20:52:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
What can I say Snark? What can I possibly say?
I want to beat up all these children for fun.
and this was good.
Submitted by Joemama (user info) at 2005-02-02 20:50:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Excellent Writing, but your
character was still a: snitch(=-1)
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2005-02-02 20:49:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Grouse... not sure that means.
I have hunted Grouse on several occasions.
I've run over a few hundred of them...
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2005-02-02 20:49:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for groundhog day!
Submitted by Impassive-Digressive (user info) at 2005-02-02 20:46:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Grouse.
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-02-02 20:39:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
THE feel good story of the year.
Damn, Snark. You made me wanna cry.
Submitted by Remission (user info) at 2005-02-02 20:39:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
wow