A chapter of my life remembered and revealed Pt. II (1131 hits)
Category: RomanceRating: 1.93 on 36 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (View user info) at 2005-02-10 11:05:29 EST
The First Part : http://www.ubersite.com/m/59126
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After visiting whom I believed to be the only person I have ever truly "loved" in the Shock Trauma Ward on Christmas Eve, my birthday nonetheless, I headed home. At this point my mind is in conflict between what I know and what I feel.
I spent most of that day with a few of my friends smoking and watching TV. I had decided not to tell anybody about what had happened partially because I didn't want to ruin their holidays but mostly because I hadn't taken stock of the situation and didn't want to be bothered about how I felt about everything.
Later that night I told a few of my closer friends and was greeted with the expected reaction. I trudged on through the night letting the alcohol wash over my thoughts in a vain hope all my apprehension about the situation would be gone the next morning.
But they were waiting for me when I woke up.
Clever little things, clinging in the back of my mind; waiting for the right time to come out. Fuckers
Christmas time was pretty joyless for me that year.
Yea I got to see my family, and I got to see some old friends. But sometimes all things are overshadowed so deeply that there is no conciliation.
I went back to the hospital on Christmas, and I brought a bunch of our mutual friends.
Everyone brought flowers and balloons, and everyone cared.
She stayed in the hospital for 7 days, and I visited her every day. Besides me bringing everybody there on Christmas nobody else but family visited her for her entire stay.
I was there when she went home.
I spent the rest of the day with her.
Because of the amount of orthopedic surgery done to her legs, she was now in a wheelchair. It was going to be 2 months before she could stand and a few more before she'd get to walk again.
I went over every day to visit her while I was on break from school.
I helped her father build a wheelchair ramp into their house in the freezing cold.
I constantly called people begging them to go visit her if even for a couple of minutes. Most were to busy or claimed that seeing her in such a condition was too emotional for them to handle.
Every day I came over we never talked about "us". We never talked about what we had done to each other. We never talked about our regrets, and we never talked about our future.
We just talked about nothing, and at the time we were both fine with that.
But school started back up inevitably.
I still came to visit as often as I could.
An hour and a half drive each way, and I still managed to see her a few times a week. The fact she told me how much it meant to her that I came over only made me redouble my efforts. It felt good knowing I was helping someone in such a time. Wouldn't we all want the same?
Soon weeks turned into months and by early March she could go out to other places.
I always have empathy for people in wheelchairs now, and even the people who help them around. It's no small feat loading and unloading everywhere you go. Searching for a handicap ramp and dodging all the self important people of this world.
What began as my attempts to just get her out of the house slowly became more.
I used to take her to the mall. The mall became the movies. I used to take her over to friends houses. Soon we were eating dinner together on Friday night. Suddenly we were dating again. We talked about the situation and were both happy with the arrangement. It was like picking up where we had left off over a year earlier. No hard feelings about what had happened in the past, just happiness that we had each other again.
Always be cautious when staring into the light, you'll only see the things change that you want to see.
I finished my semester at school and got an internship nearby. I was an assistant site foreman for the largest Golf Course builder in the US, building a 36 hole course with two attached housing developments. Working a job like that is strenuous, but it's good experience. I used to work ten to twelve hours a day, 6 days a week. Work like that in the hot summer sun can take a toll on you; and since I am a person who takes great pride in my work quitting or otherwise was out of the question.
I've always been the kind of person who needs time for themselves. Without it I slowly lose my mind. I need time to just sit and do nothing, just sit back and unwind. That's probably why I've always like fishing. No obligations to talk, no where to go, and nobody rushing you. Just you and nature. Its funny how simple things in life are often the most enjoyed. Unfortunately though, in between my personal needs and my work obligation I was having less and less time for her.
This became a problem.
Change is inevitable, fighting it is foolish.
By the end of the summer the situation had become more dynamic. No longer was the equation as simple as me visiting her every free moment I had; as simple as me spending all my time with her and her with me. By now she could get around on crutches and was able to drive her car again. The guy whom she had been in a car accident was calling from New York. Now that he was able to walk he planned on coming down and seeing her. I of course was not crazy about this and bluntly stated so.
I thought my blunt opinion was suffice to express my opinion
I was wrong, again
One Friday night after work I called and received no answer. I went out figuring I'd talk to her later and we'd meet up. I tried calling several more times throughout the night but never reached her. The next morning she called me and asked me to come over.
I sensed impending doom
My suspicions were right. He had come down
We of course argued about it and it remained a point of tension for weeks.
Then Halloween
Most people wear masks on Halloween. She took hers off. She decided in her drunken state that a party full of people would be a fitting place to tell me she had slept with him when he came down to visit.
Twice no less.
Well Jack Daniels and I would have no besmirching of our honor that night.
Was it right for me to yell in the midst of throngs of happy people what a good for nothing slut my girlfriend was? No. Did it feel good? You bet your sweet ass it did.
The argument carried into the front yard, and there we stood. Myself dressed as the Mad Hatter and her as Rainbow Brite. The yelling escalated into her taking a swing at me and assaulting my very manhood.
Never before and never since have I felt like I did at that moment.
I grabbed her by her shirt and swung her off her feet in a raging fury.
But I abruptly stopped and dropped her on the ground and left.
In that one single second I realized that I didn't love her. I realized that all the reasons I was there were the wrong ones. It's amazing how one single moment your whole life can turn around, all of the sudden you find your self staring straight down at the ground feeling the world cave in around you.
I think that's the only time I've ever had an epiphany
I walked out of that party and right out of her life.
I saw her once more after that, about three weeks later. I had shunned her calls since that night and opted just to come by unannounced to collect a few of my things.
I remember seeing her in the doorway, and I wanted to show her how much the pain hurts, but I can't find the words; everything's just gone.
I remember her reaching her arms out to embrace me, trying to change what's happening.
I just turned away with without saying a word.
It's over things had changed too much now. The person I have fond memories is dead, as is the person who might have ever loved her.
I can still take consolation in one thing from this whole ordeal.
I was right about everything happening for a reason. I was right about waiting for what you want. I was right about it all.
On December 17th 2002 after my last final I went to a small get together at a person's house I had met through her.
I met a girl there that night.
I married that girl on May 23rd 2004
-fin-
User Reviews
Submitted by drgoatcabin (user info) at 2006-12-08 14:49:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
There aren't enough high fives in the world to cover the greatness of this story. I was having a shitty day, not anymore.
Submitted by YoMikeyA (user info) at 2006-12-08 14:12:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
wish i could have that same epiphany....
Submitted by transformer (user info) at 2005-06-24 00:53:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
yes
Submitted by spidy (user info) at 2005-06-23 13:47:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh man, this was so good. I cried and now all my coworkers think Im a baby. It was a small price to pay. Good Luck with life dude.
Submitted by MyNameIsTim (user info) at 2005-05-17 14:12:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That was nice.
i teared up...
Submitted by Soley_Trinity (user info) at 2005-02-11 04:58:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Soley_Trinity (user info) at 2005-02-11 04:48:33 (#)
Ranking: 2
Things happen for a reason.
______________________________
I loved the last sentence.
Submitted by mrwolf (user info) at 2005-02-11 03:50:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Could have swore I rated this. Ah well get back on the MRR then won't you.
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2005-02-10 16:47:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
rainbow brite costume! cool!
and i don't think i know what bismirched means.
+2 though
Submitted by Davros (user info) at 2005-02-10 16:29:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I relate to stuff in this part too.
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Submitted by WhatTheHell (user info) at 2005-02-10 11:40:31 (#)
Ranking: 2
Good stuff dude.. congrats!
But allow me to say this...........
STOP BEING SO SERIOUS...RETURN TO UNBRIDLED FRIVOLITY PLEASE
Thank you.
-------------------------------------
I don't mind if you do, but please throw in the occasional piece like this as it was superb.
-Dave
Submitted by ariseymour (user info) at 2005-02-10 16:29:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by knucklesnelson (user info) at 2005-02-10 14:34:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by BrittInToledo (user info) at 2005-02-10 14:25:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I savored Part II, reading slowly to understand each word. Beautiful!
Submitted by EatMeCompletely (user info) at 2005-02-10 13:58:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Very good story. I've been to shock trauma in Baltimore. I find it when I have been places that anonymous folks on the web have. Either way, great story and congratulations. I wish you the best.
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2005-02-10 13:33:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Whoah.
Submitted by Yes (user info) at 2005-02-10 13:09:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by QueenSkye (user info) at 2005-02-10 13:07:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i probably needed to read this...
Submitted by mikethescottish (user info) at 2005-02-10 13:06:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow. Good story, well written.
Submitted by L-Gizzle (user info) at 2005-02-10 12:49:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow, that was really good.
Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2005-02-10 12:33:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2005-02-10 12:31:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I skimmed through this the first time and thought you ended up with the girl who cheated on you, then I read the first part. I am glad I re-read the end of the second part because it would have ruined my day to know you ended up marrting a girl who would have cheated on you again.
Submitted by ess-arr (user info) at 2005-02-10 11:48:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2005-02-10 11:46:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by WhatTheHell (user info) at 2005-02-10 11:40:31 (#)
Ranking: 2
Good stuff dude.. congrats!
But allow me to say this...........
STOP BEING SO SERIOUS...RETURN TO UNBRIDLED FRIVOLITY PLEASE
Thank you.
===============================
Yea, I will
I was just feeling sentimental the other day
I proposed on Valentines Day, thats probably why
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-02-10 11:45:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You're made of awesomeness!
This was great and congrats to you.
Submitted by Stin (user info) at 2005-02-10 11:40:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by WhatTheHell (user info) at 2005-02-10 11:40:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Good stuff dude.. congrats!
But allow me to say this...........
STOP BEING SO SERIOUS...RETURN TO UNBRIDLED FRIVOLITY PLEASE
Thank you.
Submitted by pantsarestupid (user info) at 2005-02-10 11:37:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
One song
The Streets - Dry Your Eyes
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-02-10 11:29:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
very well written.
excellent.
Submitted by Faithless_Whisper (user info) at 2005-02-10 11:23:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Perfect. A great story with a good lesson.
Submitted by GodLovesALittleLovin (user info) at 2005-02-10 11:22:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Kre8rix (user info) at 2005-02-10 11:19:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
That was awesome.
Congratulations.
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2005-02-10 11:17:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2005-02-10 11:10:57 (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow...just wow.
What a great story. Nicely done.
===========================
Not a just a story
MY LIFE...
Submitted by Teephphah (user info) at 2005-02-10 11:17:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
FUCKING. AWESOME.
Gah. I want to elaborate on that. But, there is too much in there. God, talk about a "slice of life." Man.
This really packs a whallop.
Submitted by MandaPanda (user info) at 2005-02-10 11:15:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2005-02-10 11:10:57 (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow...just wow.
What a great story. Nicely done.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I can't stand girls like that.
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2005-02-10 11:12:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You should have kicked her crippled ass. Then post her information up on the internet.
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2005-02-10 11:12:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2005-02-10 11:10:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow...just wow.
What a great story. Nicely done.