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What not to do when evading mentally deprived, armed spastics. (686 hits)

Category: Quotes & Stories

Rating: -0.4 on 8 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Labels:

Submitted by Lethal Bunny (View user info) at 2005-02-10 20:51:52 EST


It was a fine day at school. The usual schedule, just like last week. The same trouble making, the same social challenges.

I casually waited for lunch break to come, anxious to enjoy the mischief of bored teenagers forced to go to school. But this day was going to be my first encouter with a fork throwin spazz.

First of all, I had something to eat. Once finished, I made my way up to my form room. Every now and often, I would hear a dull thud, coming from the form room, followed by "again, again!" and constant noise.

My first mistake was when I opened that door.

Recently, my school recieved a new pupil. I had heard rumors that he was a little 'strange' but thought nothing of it. I then heard a few days after, that he had arrived at the school, and had already stabbed somebody with his trusty biro pen.

I opened the door, and saw the most deluded thing in my life. before me stood a 5' 2" underweight, dandruff lined spazz. He had taken up the pastime of throwing forks at the wall - for now. I watched as the fork rebounded off the tele and hit some kid in the chest, leaving him groaning on the floor.

Why did I then go in?

I stepped through the doorway, and carefully shut the door, but was met by the demonic glare of a possessed madman.

While I was preoccupied with this ghastly sight, I later became to know that several of my class mates had passed a bag of forks to the wierd freak.

Noticing that the idiot was beginning to move, I started moving away from him. I could hear him counting manically under his breath. He counted differently, more like "4, 7, 2, 6..." I was scared.

Suddenly, the person pounced on me, just missing me. He cried out in fury and madness, with a strange lust to kill and injure me. I kept on running, and saw a fork fly past my head.

I turned around. I gave the twat the finger, accompanied by my entire vocabulary of insults.

The now furious boy started walking towards me step by step. I moved back, almost syncchronised with him. Then I found my self, back to the wall. The madman stood around 7 feet away from me.

What happened next I am not sure about, but in the course of a few seconds, the following events occured, in any particular order:

I fell over
I got mugged
I got a flying fork embedded in my forehead
I fell unconscious

I woke up ten minutes later, helped by many of my 'mates' kicking me, punching me, etc...

What did I say to the madman?

Want a piece of me?????








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User Reviews


Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2005-02-11 15:42:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Tards are always good for a laugh or two.

Submitted by Gollman (user info) at 2005-02-11 15:27:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

No Comment

Submitted by Vomit (user info) at 2005-02-11 15:12:50 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

No Comment

Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2005-02-11 15:01:25 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

No Comment

Submitted by Gollman (user info) at 2005-02-11 11:15:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

i from england you faggot, and pupil also means student.

fucker

Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-02-11 07:57:17 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

Pupils belong in your eyes, students go to school.

Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-02-11 07:45:51 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

equalized!

Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2005-02-10 23:23:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

I liked this.


The reason I look unhappy is that tonight I have to see a slide show
starring my wife's sisters -- or as I call them, `the gruesome twosome.'

-- Homer Simpson
Krusty Gets Busted