Battle for Uber - Tales from the forge (408 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 0.56 on 11 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by FuckTheArmy (View user info) at 2005-02-11 20:30:50 EST
This is an adjunct to the universe described by PMJ, where monsters, demons, ancient mages, and sword weilding maniacs battle each other to the death.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Repairs? Why of course.
I suspect that gap in your armour, yes, the one between your second and third pair of shoulders, would be best filled by hard leather. Why not chain mail, you ask? Well for one, it's lighter - and there's always the problem of chafing.
You think you know better? Say, see that armourer's mark? I EARNED that. In battle.
Yes, in battle. Nigh on seventeen years ago, when the Maelstrom last came here. Two to one, we outnumbered them, yet CATAL, Circe and Spedmonkey stood strong on that mountain of fire yonder. They cut a fine swathe through every charge. At the end of the third hour of battle, half our forces lay on the ground, bodies of our fallen comrades laid up as a rampart by them, and their dead numbering but few.
This, my friend, while strengthening their position, was their downfall. For as you know, the mighty blades of bedlam are at their weakest in the melee, though they held a defensive position ahead of Tigerlily's archers, while the first division was still a day's march west, across the swamp.
I was but an apprentice armourer, but as a hulking brute with some respect for my age, I gave word to Bigmike, my chief and liege, to send a runner to AJ. If they would construct a fort, we would construct a siege engine.
Perhaps, you would think, this would make me a mechanic, rather than an armourer. But indeed, with no materials available except our fighting kit, young beast, there was no recourse. We commenced to strip our armour one by one, attaching piece by piece to make the largest and strongest shield the land of Uber has ever known.
Our brothers, who lay on the ground away from the stockade, we collected, for many hides are tough, and a corpse left to rot is a corpse wasted, I say. Leather armour does not match metal, but when it is two inches thick on top of your own hide, and you are twice the size of the opponents, albeit only the same number, few blades pierce the flesh.
Beast climbing on beast, forty yards high it was! The largest and strongest took the weight at the bottom, in a pyramid, of sorts, carrying the shield up the hill, raising it high, until we reached the ramparts, arrows bouncing away in all directions, crossbow bolts thudding and dropping under our feet, we swarmed in and trapped them in their own fortress against the walls of the fiery volcano.
It has never been said in the Horde, that a fallen brother cannot help you, if only you can imagine how. That, my friend, was how I earned my armourer's mark.
User Reviews
Submitted by Can_Always_Trust_A_Liar (user info) at 2005-02-12 16:10:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Cool. Is anything happening with this?
Should the characters involved add their own personal stories for Battle for Uber? It was my understanding that PMJ wanted to do it himself.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-02-12 07:51:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I like this idea
Submitted by Stin (user info) at 2005-02-12 04:57:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I really like the asides to this series, they've all been worth the read and well-written.
Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2005-02-12 01:53:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Seems like a good idea
Submitted by Joemama (user info) at 2005-02-12 01:48:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
For anything with a
siege engine in it
Submitted by Bizdorph (user info) at 2005-02-12 01:36:19 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Auto plaigiarism -2.
Submitted by Feijuada (user info) at 2005-02-12 01:21:21 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Id (user info) at 2005-02-11 22:46:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Thank you for contributing to this.
Hope this offsets the rough start this post got....
Submitted by FuckTheArmy (user info) at 2005-02-11 21:14:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Tigre, it's not about armour. Certainly, you know nothing about armour if you don't know that good plate mail can easily be riveted together into a good solid giant shield, if you have a good armourer.
When you have something worth reading, in ANY of your posts or reviews, perhaps then your opinion will be valid to me. Until then, you are dead to my mind.
Submitted by Tigre (user info) at 2005-02-11 20:53:26 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
You know nothing of armour, repair, creation or comfort do you? Fuckin idjiet.
Submitted by FuckTheArmy (user info) at 2005-02-11 20:50:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh yeah... and here's where it all started.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/53914