Who told you that was a good idea? (990 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1 on 47 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Lojope <lojope.at.juno.com> (View user info) at 2005-02-23 08:58:09 EST
Seriously. Do you look at yourself and think "Damn. I look GOOD."?
Listen, there is nothing wrong with your body. If you love it, I love it. That's great. Good self-esteem is awesome.
But for FUCK sake, know your limit. There are some things you just can't wear. There are some things I can't wear. There are some things Catherine Zeta Jones can't wear. We all have certain styles that we just can't pull off. And we all have a style or colour that looks great on us.
Please, find yours.
I'm thinking, maybe black... and ankle length.
And please, have the balls to be honest with your friends. This is not a "safety in numbers" situation.
User Reviews
Submitted by Mario (user info) at 2005-03-05 13:30:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Buffalo Bill would have a field day with these manatees...I bet you could make a sweet archangel suit and glide like a flying squirrel. But don't fly too close to the sun or the world below is showered with sweat that smells like cheese.
Fat people use a lot of soap...I'd give Tyler Durden a call to make soap out of my rolls and give it back to me, so I wouldn't be taking more than my fair share of the world's soap.
Yep, life is pretty bad when you start looking like a giant bloated foreskin.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2005-02-23 14:54:39 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
damn you, i'm blind now ed cant tipe asdas wek!@*@#!
Submitted by Dannie (user info) at 2005-02-23 12:53:20 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
No Comment
Submitted by the_lone_stranger (user info) at 2005-02-23 12:15:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Where can I get a subscription?
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2005-02-23 12:06:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
JESUS!
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2005-02-23 12:05:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2005-02-23 10:59:31 (#)
Ranking: 0
Lojope,
What are some things that YOU won't wear?
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Well... fake leather bikinis for one. Also I can't wear white or light beige. My skin is just too pale, and I end up looking sickly and washed out. I also can't pull off those hot knee-high boots. I wish I could, but they just don't work on me.
Submitted by ess-arr (user info) at 2005-02-23 11:36:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
so that's what happened to my exs
Submitted by Drone_of_Industry (user info) at 2005-02-23 11:24:41 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
ha ha... fat people!
Submitted by InkyFingers (user info) at 2005-02-23 11:18:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Are they having some sort of contest? Interesting...
Submitted by wanderingsharps (user info) at 2005-02-23 11:18:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I hate you...
do you know how much liquer I will need to drink to
get that picture out of my mind?
You deserve bonus evil points for this one...
Submitted by stardamage (user info) at 2005-02-23 11:14:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You know it's bad when you can't see the bikini bottom because your fat rolls cover it.
Man. I almost spilled tea on myself for the second time in twenty minutes when I saw that. Ew.
Submitted by satchel (user info) at 2005-02-23 11:12:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
How do people GET to that point?
Submitted by Faithless_Whisper (user info) at 2005-02-23 11:12:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I will never complain about those 5 extra pounds ever again.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2005-02-23 11:09:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
DAMNIT LOJO...
I don't need that fried into my retenas this early!
And then that kelly post you linked to...
Sonofabeezer...
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2005-02-23 11:08:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
yiiiii
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2005-02-23 11:00:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'd do the one on the cleft.
Submitted by 1Point21Gigawatts (user info) at 2005-02-23 11:00:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Fuck you!
I was eating when I clicked on this post!
Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2005-02-23 10:59:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Lojope,
What are some things that YOU won't wear?
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2005-02-23 10:38:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
She looks funny in a certain shade of green.
Submitted by jumpinjellyfish (user info) at 2005-02-23 10:27:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
That's a "whole lotta love"
What is it that Catherine Zeta Jones can't wear?
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2005-02-23 10:23:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Come to my office and clean the vomit off my keyboard
Submitted by Kre8rix (user info) at 2005-02-23 10:18:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
<vomit>
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2005-02-23 10:16:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I declare ALL women of Uber more beautiful than the girl on the left!!!
Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2005-02-23 10:15:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Shlongy be nice.
I'm going to Garden City this weekend to play some golf.
Email me. (nitty34.at.yahoo.com)
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-02-23 10:13:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Lojope and her sisters at the last family reunion.
Submitted by TheSunGod (user info) at 2005-02-23 10:05:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ho. Lee. COWS!
Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2005-02-23 10:05:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Mom???
Submitted by j0andre1 (user info) at 2005-02-23 09:56:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
That's a whole lotta mamma jamma right there
I wonder which one is the "bull"?
Submitted by girlintheworld (user info) at 2005-02-23 09:52:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-02-23 09:16:01 (#)
Ranking: 2
I WANT THIS POSTER SIZED AND ON MY WALL BY THE END OF THE DAY.
MAKE IT HAPPEN.
(I feel pretty,
Oh, so pretty,
I feel pretty and witty and bright!
And I pity
Any girl who isn't me tonight.
I feel charming,
Oh, so charming
It's alarming how charming I feel!
And so pretty
That I hardly can believe I'm real.
See the pretty girl in that mirror there:
Who can that attractive girl be?
Such a pretty face,
Such a pretty dress,
Such a pretty smile,
Such a pretty me! )
Put it on the wall near the mirror.
________
Circe, I have a BETTER song!
I'm a girl, and by me that's only great!
I am proud that my silhouette is curvy,
That I walk with a sweet and girlish gait
With my hips kind of swivelly and swervy.
I adore being dressed in something frilly
When my date comes to get me at my place.
Out I go with my Joe or John or Billy,
Like a filly who is ready for the race!
When I have a brand new hairdo
With my eyelashes all in curl,
I float as the clouds on air do,
I enjoy being a girl!
When men say I'm cute and funny
And my teeth aren't teeth, but pearl,
I just lap it up like honey
I enjoy being a girl!
I flip when a fellow sends me flowers,
I drool over dresses made of lace,
I talk on the telephone for hours
With a pound and a half of cream upon my face!
I'm strictly a female female
And my future I hope will be
In the home of a brave and free male
Who'll enjoy being a guy having a girl... like... me.
When men say I'm sweet as candy
As around in a dance we whirl,
It goes to my head like brandy,
I enjoy being a girl!
When someone with eyes that smoulder
Says he loves ev'ry silken curl
That falls on my iv'ry shoulder,
I enjoy being a girl!
When I hear the compliment'ry whistle
That greets my bikini by the sea,
I turn and I glower and I bristle,
But I happy to know the whistle's meant for me!
I'm strictly a female female
And my future I hope will be
In the home of a brave and free male
Who'll enjoy being a guy having a girl... like... me.
Submitted by JohnGalt (user info) at 2005-02-23 09:41:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow...just wow.
Black and ankle length is certainly not a bad idea.
Submitted by Feijuada (user info) at 2005-02-23 09:41:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hahaha, fat fucks.
Submitted by WhatTheHell (user info) at 2005-02-23 09:40:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Uhm... yuck.
Submitted by Coyote (user info) at 2005-02-23 09:38:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Yes, it's the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man...
...crossed with the Brides of Frankenstein.
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2005-02-23 09:29:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Everything you ever wanted to know about Dustbrother
User id: 6750
Registered on or around: 2004-03-14 14:54:17
# Messages posted: 15
# Reviews written: 298
# Times these posts have been reviewed : 244
# Hits: 4819
Average rating of all messages: -0.51
~*~*~*~*~
Who told you posting was a good idea?
Submitted by MickGinny (user info) at 2005-02-23 09:26:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by Durae (user info) at 2005-02-23 09:06:00 (#)
Ranking: 2
by comparison, the redhead looks pretty good.
-------------------
I would usually agree with that statement as a general rule. However in this instance, it would be similar to saying: ehh, i cant think of anything witty...most likely because i have been assaulted by this picture before 10am.
Submitted by Hadooken (user info) at 2005-02-23 09:26:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
your right. thats what i get for being lazy.
Submitted by Dustbrother (user info) at 2005-02-23 09:22:56 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
http://stuff.ubersite.com/1086692267258215405/1/uberpost.JPG
Who told you that was a good idea?
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-02-23 09:16:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ick!
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-02-23 09:16:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I WANT THIS POSTER SIZED AND ON MY WALL BY THE END OF THE DAY.
MAKE IT HAPPEN.
(I feel pretty,
Oh, so pretty,
I feel pretty and witty and bright!
And I pity
Any girl who isn't me tonight.
I feel charming,
Oh, so charming
It's alarming how charming I feel!
And so pretty
That I hardly can believe I'm real.
See the pretty girl in that mirror there:
Who can that attractive girl be?
Such a pretty face,
Such a pretty dress,
Such a pretty smile,
Such a pretty me! )
Put it on the wall near the mirror.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2005-02-23 09:13:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
HA! Rock on, ladies.
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2005-02-23 09:10:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Haha. I was thinking that too, Durae.
Submitted by Durae (user info) at 2005-02-23 09:06:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
by comparison, the redhead looks pretty good.
Submitted by funk_boy (user info) at 2005-02-23 09:05:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
<ejaculates>
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2005-02-23 09:01:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
If you had been on time, http://www.ubersite.com/m/60367 would have been the first thing you saw, hadooken. It's not that much better.
Submitted by Hadooken (user info) at 2005-02-23 09:00:09 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
not the thing i want to see first thing in the morning when i roll into work 2 hours late.
Submitted by creep_firebombing (user info) at 2005-02-23 08:59:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I hurt.
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2005-02-23 08:58:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Is it thursday?