Guess who wins an Internet shirt? (1032 hits)
Category: GraphicsRating: 1.3 on 27 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Otters (View user info) at 2005-02-24 21:47:58 EST
Finally, I made a decision.
I got a lot more entries on this one than on the last one, so my job was a lot harder. MandaPanda, Bart, Hadooken, Darko, Phuzzygish, Lojope, L-Gizzle, and someone named Kevin entered, and I thank them deeply for their wonderful entries. Unfortunately not everyone can win a shirt, but at least you made an effort. Still, you have nothing to show for all that work save a sinking feeling of failure. That's what you get for not being good enough, though.
I had a lot of factors to consider, namely:
1)I'm pretty sure Bart can ban me from the Internet if I make him angry.
2)Panda has big boobies and bribed me with four boxes of thin mints.
3)Hadooken owns a gun.
4)Darko won already and looks like Christian Bale in American Psycho a little.
5)Phuzzygish lives in Africa and it would cost the most to ship something to him, but he really deserves something for his last entry.
But when it all came down to it I really tried to think about which entry really captured the artist's love for this ephemeral alive-yet-artificial being that is Internet.
Riiiight. When it all came down to it I picked the most retarded one. The Internet, above all, is incredibly retarded, and I think Hadooken's captured that the best. It is a picture of him making a video of him fucking me in the ass. I really tried to be fair and I really want to send everyone shirts, so if the rest of you want to send me a few bucks to cover the shipping to your house I will make you a free shirt and send it to you on Monday. Keep in mind you will still need to take a picture of yourself in the shirt and then I can photoshop the pictures all together so it looks like we're having a party and everyone else will be sooo jealous.
Oh, also, I am going into the city (of Los Angeles) tomorrow and have a few hours to kill. Does anyone have any suggestions where I should go to breakfast and/or want to eat it with me? I hate eating alone. Unless you are completely insane. Please let me know beforehand if you are insane.
GRAND PRIZE ENTRY INTERNET CONTEST!
User Reviews
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2005-06-10 03:24:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
why'd you stop posting?
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-03-08 04:41:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Just don't wear clothes.
Submitted by phuzzygish (user info) at 2005-03-08 04:37:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No, not yet. Otters told me today that she's just finished Hadooken's one, will be sending mine sometime next week. So now I may be forced to actually do some laundry, come the weekend.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-03-08 04:30:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Did you get your shirt, dude?
Submitted by phuzzygish (user info) at 2005-03-08 04:17:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
*fried*, not friend. doh.
Submitted by phuzzygish (user info) at 2005-03-08 04:09:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Or friend kittens and cheese beer...
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-03-08 03:48:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
When is your next post?
We could talk about kittens, or beer, or flowers, or fried cheese curds.
Submitted by bart (user info) at 2005-02-28 03:10:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I demand a recount!
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2005-02-28 03:08:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
retaliatory -2...wait what thefuclk?
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-02-26 08:41:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by phuzzygish (user info) at 2005-02-25 04:14:42 (#)
Ranking: 2
Yay! I'm getting foreign clothes. cool beans. I'll post it, and me in it, when i get it. it it.
==================
What are you talking about?
The clothes aren't foreign, you are!
Submitted by phuzzygish (user info) at 2005-02-25 04:14:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Yay! I'm getting foreign clothes. cool beans. I'll post it, and me in it, when i get it. it it.
Submitted by Otters (user info) at 2005-02-25 02:08:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Yes, phuzzy I will make you a shirt. I'm not sure how much it costs to send something to Africa. Maybe I'll look it up somewhere.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-02-25 01:52:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Go eat at the NORMS on La Cieniga north of Beverly. Its on the right.
I will not be able to attend, however, since I live in the box under your desk.
Submitted by phuzzygish (user info) at 2005-02-25 01:46:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I think I want a t-shirt anyway. Want some money?
Submitted by phuzzygish (user info) at 2005-02-25 01:45:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
NOOOOOOO!!!! Noofukkingwayys!!! I tried soooo hard!!! I need new clothes!!! I'm African!!! So I'm poor!!! And i'm running out of exclamation marks!!! NOOOO!!!!
Swak.
Oh well. I'm not bitter. I'm like a medium astringent, slightly tart, but not bitter. It's all about competing, not winning. Right?
Right??
Submitted by Hadooken (user info) at 2005-02-24 23:27:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i also wrote a haiku about the internet in the email that accompanied that drawing. anybody who has been around a while knows i am a haiku god..... that sealed it i think.
Submitted by Hadooken (user info) at 2005-02-24 23:25:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!
first i want to thank otters for putting on this contest, i'd also like to thank my mom for raising me right and jeebus christ. he gave me the power and the talent to do what i had to do. i'd also like to thank my publicist, my agent, bart, my mail carrier, and the wonderful people at microsoft for making paint available to me.
<sheds single tear>
Submitted by vettesrule88 (user info) at 2005-02-24 22:47:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
i am the someone named kevin!
as for my entry-- it was terriddlyiffic
That Girl
That one beautiful girl,
with necklace of pure white pearls,
trips and falls over.
IM me at vettesrule88 with comments about this wonderful poem
Submitted by Joemama (user info) at 2005-02-24 22:11:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Good choice
On multiple levels
Submitted by Otters (user info) at 2005-02-24 22:04:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
And anyway, I think this is funny, even if there is a million ms paint drawings around here. Maybe I should have posted everyone else's work, too.
Submitted by Otters (user info) at 2005-02-24 22:02:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Otters (user info) at 2005-02-24 21:55:58 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Genko (user info) at 2005-02-24 21:54:12 (#)
Ranking: -2
This is a fucking letdown.
You had an idea with real potential and you completely squandered it.
-------
Oh shut up.
--------
Maybe I should elaborate. I got a lot of poetry that was under ten lines, a story by Manda that could clearly stand on its own as a post, some ms paint stuff, and a really good entry by Phuzzygish. I would have made phuzzy the winner, but while his work is great always I don't think he really captured "Internet" like Hadooken did. I'm serious. His entry for my other contest deserved to win, but that's a different contest and it wouldn't be fair to give him first prize for this contest to make up for it.
So, shut up.
Submitted by Genko (user info) at 2005-02-24 21:58:55 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Oh, how about you shut up?
Do you honestly believe the Internet doesn't have enough stupid MS Paint drawings of stick figures having sex?
Submitted by Otters (user info) at 2005-02-24 21:55:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Genko (user info) at 2005-02-24 21:54:12 (#)
Ranking: -2
This is a fucking letdown.
You had an idea with real potential and you completely squandered it.
-------
Oh shut up.
Submitted by Genko (user info) at 2005-02-24 21:54:12 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
This is a fucking letdown.
You had an idea with real potential and you completely squandered it.
Submitted by TheSpook (user info) at 2005-02-24 21:53:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Going to LA?
I suggest your bring a raft.
Submitted by MandaPanda (user info) at 2005-02-24 21:50:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
*gasp!*
-2 for you. For life.
Now, when everyone starts getting mad at me for my next internet contest because I need to get rid of those cookies, I can blame it on you.
Submitted by Rawrg (user info) at 2005-02-24 21:50:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Lay waste! Burn her crops and then Salt the fields!