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For Teephphah, to show that inspiration strikes in the strangest places... (879 hits)

Category: None
Labels: Inspired Perversion

Rating: 1.98 on 31 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Labels:

Submitted by Jack McCallum (View user info) at 2005-03-01 15:48:48 EST


In regard to this post http://www.ubersite.com/m/60932 by Teephphah and the following comment—

"Here is a picture I found on Google that I've never figured out where to use."

Here you go.

----------------------------------------
MY SORDID TALE, OR, HOW I WON IN THE END
----------------------------------------

I like the Japanese. I admire their men— restrained, dignified, with a fetish I share, a lust I can understand. I love their women and what they wear in cartoons, dirty pictures, and everyday life.

I only listen to Elvis. There is no other music for me.

Why do I like the Japanese and Elvis?

Because we all have an obsession in common.

Panties.

Pristine, simple white cotton panties.

I must have them. I must.

It started with my mother.

My earliest memories are from my infancy. Lying on the floor, on a deep shag rug. The rung was orange. I would lie on the floor on the sunken living room completely safe, playing with my plush toys. Some days my mother wore pants. Jeans or shorts. On those days a cloud obscured my sun. On the best days my mother wore skirts, and as she walked by or went upstairs I could roll on my back and see heaven in her plain white cotton panties.

Sometimes she would step over me, skirt flowing, and I would see all.

I can still ejaculate without any physical manipulation when remembering those days.

When I first attended school I cried. I hated leaving my mother. I have vague memories of my mother crying and my father snarling as they left me in the classroom. I was terribly sad... until I looked around the classroom and saw all the little girls in their little dresses showing white cotton panties. If I had known what a jackpot was at that age, I would have known I had just hit it.

That moment was the beginning and the end. It was then, before I could truly convey my feelings in words that I dedicated my life to one goal.

Making those panties mine.

Make no mistake. I'm not a fag. I have intercourse with women from time to time. I don't want to wear the panties. I just want to own them. Smell them. Bury my face in them. Dive into a vast pile of them.

The first pair of panties I ever acquired, that long-ago first day of school, I got in a trade. I went all around the classroom stealing every blue crayon out of every Crayola box. I offered them to one of the girls. The trade was done. I then realized that it would be easier to just take the panties.

I was sent home early that first day, accused of attacking the girls.

In Grade school, things escalated. The girls were bigger, their panties were nicer, and they fought harder to keep them.

I spent years going in and out of special classes and therapy, collecting more panties. I would beg, borrow, and steal. I even crept into the teacher's restroom and reached under a stall, grabbing at a pair of panties draped around a teacher's ankles. I pulled and ran, the screams echoing in my head. I had my first emission, and it was wonderful.

My father regularly beat the tar out of me. Once, when we were in the backyard tidying up the lawn on a Saturday in the fall, I froze in the act of raking up leaves as my dad stumbled on a clump of sod. He lifted up the patch of living grass and discovered a wooden box. Inside were one hundred and seventy three pairs of panties.

I left home at sixteen and drifted from job to job. I ended up in San Diego. I lived in a small apartment. I rented a storage space outside the city as a repository for my always growing collection. High school girls. Waitresses. Working mothers. Maids. Nurses. I took panties from all of them. I was insatiable.

I did jail time. Fathers and husbands beat the tar out of me. I was registered as a sex offender. But I never hurt anyone. I just wanted those panties.

My life may have continued like that indefinitely, had I not been downtown one spring day, walking along L Street, when I saw a crowd coming out of the Omni Hotel. A half-obscured sign informed me there was some sort of symposium on security taking place. One of the guests was a big woman, and when a gust of wind lifted her black skirt, I caught a glimpse of the biggest, plainest panties of all.

I shrieked. I lunged. I got those panties down to her knees before Janet Reno dislocated my jaw with one massive fist.

Now my home is Corcoran State Prison. The charges against me were trumped up. I will be here a long time.

I am not violent. I am a model prisoner. I work hard and respect others. My efforts have paid off.

I am now a supervisor in the prison laundry. My crew works hard and reaps the rewards. We recently got a new contract, a whole new load of wash, from two other state institutions which are slowly renovating their own laundry facilities.

I am in charge of laundry coming from Valley State Prison for Women, and Central California Women's Facility. I distribute the work in a fair manner. Jimmy Ray does uniform pants. His brother Buddy Joe does uniform blouses. Frank, Ed and Max do inmate smocks, jeans and t shirts. Old Ollie, who is a little slow, does all the socks. And I don not shirk from helping my fellow inmates. I do the panties.

I have found my niche, at last.

I am Pantyman.


iampantyman.jpg (25 kB)

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User Reviews


Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-10-19 04:16:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1

There are a solid four pages of +2 streaks with 30 or more reviews. That is stupid. I am weeding it all out by giving every one of them a +1; that way posts that have 1.99 with 200+ reviews gets best ever.

Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2005-08-03 12:15:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0


Supreme Overlord damage control...


Submitted by Supreme_Overlord (user info) at 2005-07-21 22:27:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2

shite

Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2005-03-03 13:56:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

No Comment

Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-03-02 15:41:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

I have a fetish for guys who have a panty fetish

Submitted by ihurtFeellings (user info) at 2005-03-02 14:58:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Hey Jack, did you know we are the same person? Did you know that HadToBeDone kicks are ass?
If you didn't check this out

http://www.ubersite.com/m/60951#1182068

+2 for being my doppelganger

Submitted by horse87 (user info) at 2005-03-02 10:28:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Didn't we go to school with this guy?



Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-03-02 02:58:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2005-03-02 02:47:01 (#)
Ranking: 0


Mitchapalooza, ladies and gentlemen!
============

Snap!!

Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2005-03-02 02:47:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 0


Mitchapalooza, ladies and gentlemen!


Submitted by algermetiphist (user info) at 2005-03-01 23:56:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Panties.... uhhh... panties.... I love panties...

Submitted by grandturismo (user info) at 2005-03-01 23:55:59 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

No Comment

Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2005-03-01 19:06:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-03-01 18:08:52 (#)
Ranking: 2

..."Do what the Romans do???"

Or did I fuck that up?

--

Yep.

San Francisco, remember? That means do as the Greeks do.


Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-03-01 18:08:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

..."Do what the Romans do???"

Or did I fuck that up?

Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2005-03-01 17:42:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-03-01 16:24:54 (#)
Ranking: 2

This is a prime example of why Jack is the fucking King.

Or maybe, in this case, the Queen.

--

When in San Francisco...


Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2005-03-01 17:19:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

bastard, don't reveal my identity

Submitted by Dannie (user info) at 2005-03-01 17:11:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

No Comment

Submitted by RamJetMax (user info) at 2005-03-01 17:10:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

"I can still ejaculate without any physical manipulation when remembering those days."

I heard that can really be done.

Submitted by MyNameIsTim (user info) at 2005-03-01 16:40:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

prove it!

Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2005-03-01 16:36:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

very funny stuff


Submitted by kaos-king (user info) at 2005-03-01 16:31:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

You are one strange bastard

Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-03-01 16:24:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

This is a prime example of why Jack is the fucking King.

Or maybe, in this case, the Queen.

Submitted by alwaysoutnumbered (user info) at 2005-03-01 16:21:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

"Inside were one hundred and seventy three pairs of panties." This line made me laugh. Actually it was more of a snort-laugh that sounded like my soul was trying to escape from my mouth. I know this, becuase my roommate said so. Good job.

Submitted by screamfeeder (user info) at 2005-03-01 16:21:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Dad?

Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2005-03-01 16:09:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

The right tool for the right job, I always say...

Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2005-03-01 16:06:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

HAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA AHA AHA *cough*

*wipes eyes*

Whew!

Submitted by Teephphah (user info) at 2005-03-01 16:00:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Wow. I'm happy to help in any way I can.

Your psyche may be just a touch cracked though.

But now that you mention it, I CAN see the panty-lust in that man's eyes.

Submitted by Badlands (user info) at 2005-03-01 15:58:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Good show.

Submitted by Soul-Fly (user info) at 2005-03-01 15:54:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

Make that "PANTY MAN"

Panty Ma sounds like incest.

Submitted by Soul-Fly (user info) at 2005-03-01 15:53:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

I soooooooooooooooooooooooo want to be "Panty Ma" God Dammit!

Submitted by ess-arr (user info) at 2005-03-01 15:53:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Pantyman, I can see that...

Submitted by Soul-Fly (user info) at 2005-03-01 15:51:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

YOU SIR, ARE A FOOKING GEEEEEEEEEEEEEENIUS!


Where is Bart, anyway? His dinner's getting all cold and eaten.

-- Homer Simpson
Bart After Dark