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Oh, Rage. How Thee Has Affected My Life Again..... (482 hits)

Category: Quotes & Stories

Rating: 0.75 on 10 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Labels:

Submitted by myredmirage95 (View user info) at 2005-03-07 13:11:06 EST


The power of rage is mighty and it befalls us at any given time. I for one have an extreme amount of rage built up inside me, which has been caused by the dumb shits of the world. It has come to the point where I hate going out in public because I get so frustrated and enraged that I can not see straight. Recently, as earlier uberposted, I took a trip the mall with my mother...ranging rant ensues. http://www.ubersite.com/m/60839 Since then, things have been worse. I've encountered countless redneck assholes, shit-loads of stupid whores and every other possible anger-inducing situation known to man, and now, I am reaping the consequences....

Thursday morning, well, afternoon, my stereo alarm blared out muffled pieces of "Numb" by Linkin Park, via 96 rock. (In retrospect, this song is kind of ironic as to what fate had in store for me.) I lifted up my head and swatted at the fly that was buzzing in my ear. I hate flies, disease encrusted little assholes. As much as I swatted, the fly would not go away and continued to buzz away into my ear...it even followed me into the bathroom and then into the kitchen and then into my computer room. What the hell? I didn't smell bad, I wasn't hallucinating, what was going on?

Then I realized, there was no fly, my ears were buzzing all on their own. At this point, I was kind of scared, but I shrugged it off and dialed up (I hate dial up) and checked my email and uber, of course.

Enter brother.
"I'm leaving" he says, putting on his jacket.

As he put on his jacket, no shit, I could hear the static from across the room. This is not normal; did I now have super power hearing action now? The only thing possible to do was to register my name in the Super Hero Data Base...oh yeah, and call in sick to work. I couldn't possibly work, you know, since I was now a super hero.

Skip to the next day....buzzing is now much fainter than the previous day, now it sounds like George Jetson's space car; most entertaining. I guess I wasn't a super hero after all. My guess was it was just an ear infection or something...must call in sick again. I did feel like shit today, honestly. Later that afternoon, as I sat here on my computer being miserable and angry for no particular reason, my leg begins to go numb, then my arm, then my shoulder, my neck and finally the side of my face. No, I wasn't having a stroke but something was definitely not right. I jumped in my car and sped to the doctor where I was told *gasp* I HAVE HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE!!!

How could I, the most calm and composed person in the world, have high blood pressure? But alas, it was true. My blood pressure read 170/110 and I was in "the danger zone" as the doctor liked to call it. The doctor, I can't remember her name, promptly told me that my lifestyle would have to change. No more salt, no more soft drinks, I must drown myself with water, exercise exercise exercise and no more rage! NO MORE RAGE??? But...but...but..... My question to her was, how can a person living in the world in the state it is, NOT become enraged? Her answer? I didn't hear because my ear was buzzing loudly again. I walked out of the doctor's office with a bag of free medications (no insurance), $105 poorer, and a $50 doctor rape-date for next week.

Because of this downfall, my weekend was shot to hell. I had made plans to have a "girls night out" with a friend, (go shopping, out to eat at a good Mexican restaurant and some midnight bowling). But because of my new friend "High Blood Pressure", I could not partake in such events and I became pissed. I couldn't go shopping because I was too fatigued from the meds, I could not eat Mexican because the food was too full of sodium (a no-no for my new lifestyle), and bowling was out of the question because I can't bowl for shit and I would probably get angry and throw a ball at someone's head and have a stroke or something. My plans changed to Chinese take-out and renting Napoleon Dynamite, Cellular and Pootie Tang. Don't judge me.

This new lifestyle is awful. I hate it and it makes me want to scream and rip my hair out...but I can't, as it would be classified as "anger" and I'm not allowed to do that anymore either. I'm probably going to just turn in my driver's license and sell my car tomorrow because there is no way I can get out on the road like this without endangering my life, or someone else's.

Hermitville, here I come.


myfuturehome2.jpg (33 kB)

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User Reviews


Submitted by Feijuada (user info) at 2005-03-07 20:46:12 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

I see I didn't -2 this. Here you go.

Submitted by MrWillard (user info) at 2005-03-07 14:46:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

No Comment

Submitted by WhatTheHell (user info) at 2005-03-07 13:29:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

Good luck with that whole "exploding heart" thing.

Submitted by myredmirage95 (user info) at 2005-03-07 13:24:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

Submitted by Jimmy (user info) at 2005-03-07 13:12:49 (#)
Ranking: -2

It's 'how THOU' you yutz

------

A thousand pardons, master of old English grammar. Fuck off.

Submitted by aceyloulou (user info) at 2005-03-07 13:23:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

I'm sorry ur such an angry person, lol. Try this, it'll help, trust me. http://www.ubersite.com/m/61241

Submitted by SiskelandFatboy (user info) at 2005-03-07 13:20:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 1

Buy a punching bag!

Helps with the venting of anger and the excercise excercise excercise

Submitted by Feijuada (user info) at 2005-03-07 13:20:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 0

-2 for:

"Thursday morning, well, afternoon, my stereo alarm blared out muffled pieces of "Numb" by Linkin Park, via 96 rock."

As well as the rest of this post. I might have given you a better rating if you told that doctor to go eat shit. Mabye you did, I don't know. I could barely read it at the end.

Submitted by TheSpook (user info) at 2005-03-07 13:16:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

I hear masturbation lowers your blood pressure.

Submitted by Jimmy (user info) at 2005-03-07 13:12:49 EST (#)
Ranking: -2

It's 'how THOU' you yutz

Submitted by Chinaski (user info) at 2005-03-07 13:12:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Shit, you're really fucked up... I'm sorry.


Asleep at the switch! I wasn't asleep! I was drunk!

-- Homer Simpson
Homer the Vigilante