"I want to play with you." (2075 hits)
Category: GeneralLabels: uberbook
Rating: 1.96 on 43 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Bigmike (View user info) at 2005-03-10 09:14:16 EST
He stood there in his nice little boys suit, a monument to solemnity and pain. There is something about seeing a five year old boy in a suit that does not sit quite right in the public conciousness. Five year olds should be dressed in T-shirts and jeans. Five year olds should be wearing sneakers and a day long smile. Five year olds should be carefree and worry free.
He was as still as a hot summer morning as he gazed out over the grass. There were stones here, but not the kind that skipped six or seven times over the top of a still country pond. He felt out of place; out of touch with the world around him and he didn't quite know how to react to all the people, all the hugs, all the tears, so he kept his mouth shut and his eyes dry. He kept them as dry as he could.
He was holding his mommy's hand, their sweat the glue of generations, their grip could, seemingly, last forever. She looked down at him occasionally to inspect his tousled hair, the deep brown of a young boys youth gone wild. She never could get that cowlick to stay down. Now it seemed insignificant.
His brother and sister stood by his side as well, swooning with regret and sadness. His older brothers eyes hadn't been dry in three days, his sister was a mountain of strength, her ten year old face covered with little girl makeup and the look of innocent pain. They stood there in a group, their aura of grief surrounding and protecting them from unwanted joy, needless frivolity.
They needed the time alone but hadn't quite got the chance to have it. There was a constant flow of people around them ever since he had gone. The mother had wished for a force field to envelope them, a time machine to take them to a better place, a place previous. The events of the past week had shattered both her sanity and her image of what the future might bring, a future which included a happy, loving family always on the brink of greatness, but never really achieving the potential that was their destiny. It was a happy world once and it seemed so very long ago.
The five year old boy stared straight into the wood as the priest started to talk. He could hear the words but could not understand their meaning. There were words of life and words of death. There were phrases pointing towards a better place, a place of serenity and peace. In the background were periodic sobs and snuffles; an occasional sigh; a brief glance at a wristwatch; a cynical smile. They were all here, friends and enemies alike. Some because they cared, some because of the obligation that death always brings.
Each family member held a long stem rose. The flowers looked to be in full bloom, the essence of life with the stems cut quick. When the priest was done, each took their turn in the long walk to the box, to the hole in the ground that foreshadowed everlasting peace.
The oldest son was first,
"I will never forget you father. You taught me well. The baseball field was our shrine, the ghosts of October our God's. You will be with me on the field now and forever. I will always love you." The rose placed horizontally across the fine wood finish, he could see the dew reflecting sunlight off of the petals. He walked away head down, feet dragging, tears adding to the moisture of the mid-morning grass.
The daughter next,
"I promise to wear less makeup daddy, I know how much you didn't like it. I will keep your picture in my book, the one you always read to me at night. I will always remember your words to me in the evening before bed, I will always hold my head up high and look forward to the next day. Just like you always told me. I love you and will miss you terribly." Her rose was laid crosswise across the first. She didn't realize it, but the symbol of the cross was unmistakable to those that followed. She, the one of proud and unerring confidence, strode away from the box knowing that she could always talk to her daddy and that he would always answer. Always. She held her tears in check in front of all these people.
Mommy and little brother were the last to walk up. Mommy was shattered completely and could hardly hold her emotions. Little brother was confused and looked as if reality hadn't quite set in. In her left hand, a rose. In his right hand, the same.
"You have always been a great father and husband, for this I am thankful and will love you forever. I will take care of our family as you did, with a smile for life and incredible optimism towards the future. I will miss you terribly." She dropped her rose on the ground and had to bend over to pick it up. Before she could, her youngest boy bent over and grabbed it for her, releasing her grip with his left hand and clutching both flowers tightly in closed fists. he slowly walked up to the box as if realizing for the first time the gravity of the situation. He gently placed both flowers on top of the box and place both hands palm down in it's top. He stood there silently for a moment and then spoke.
"I want to play with you. I only want to play with you."
The tears came then, slowly, but with mounting urgency. The mommy swept him up in her arms and he buried his face into her shoulder. They stood there while the others passed. They stood ther until everybody had gone. They stood there until he was lowered into the ground, thoughts of him fresh in their memories.
User Reviews
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2007-09-12 16:36:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Fey (user info) at 2007-09-11 16:57:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2007-09-11 16:48:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
**weeps**
Submitted by iradney (user info) at 2005-07-10 14:19:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i've read this 5 times, and each time makes my eyes all watery
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2005-04-23 04:06:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
...Wow.
Submitted by Dannie (user info) at 2005-03-14 15:50:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I wasn't expecting this. It hit me square in the gut.
Amazing writing.
Submitted by Electro (user info) at 2005-03-12 20:40:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
BRILLIANT! +2
Submitted by sparkle_pink (user info) at 2005-03-12 20:06:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Tiltedhalo (user info) at 2005-03-11 10:04:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I cried......
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2005-03-10 23:24:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2005-03-10 14:34:34 (#)
Ranking: 2
WOOOOOOOOO!
The second to last sentence, you spelled there "ther".
Yeah, it was a typo. Yeah, you spelled it right in the very next sentence. I do not care, I got to correct the very standard of good writing! Life is sweet.
Yes, you may kick me and/or tell me to shut up. :p
I am the "very standard" of good writing?
I think not.
I think my cordless keyboard needs new batteries, it keeps dropping letters. Or I just don't proofread as well as I thought.
To be honest, I saw that and seriously thought of reposting just to get rid of it. Shit like that bothers me to no end. There's another in there as well.
Submitted by Yes (user info) at 2005-03-10 19:09:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Rocktsrgn (user info) at 2005-03-10 10:25:30 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by JohnGalt (user info) at 2005-03-10 10:00:54 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by InsoManiac (user info) at 2005-03-10 09:36:49 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by beancat (user info) at 2005-03-10 09:30:07 (#)
Ranking: 2
You made me cry at work.
I didn't go to my father's funeral, I was 5. The family was worried that I would freak out like my cousin had at his dad's service the year before, he was 7 and had started screaming that he wanted his dad back and had to be dragged out of the building by someone.
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2005-03-10 14:34:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
WOOOOOOOOO!
The second to last sentence, you spelled there "ther".
Yeah, it was a typo. Yeah, you spelled it right in the very next sentence. I do not care, I got to correct the very standard of good writing! Life is sweet.
Yes, you may kick me and/or tell me to shut up. :p
Submitted by EAZEDZT (user info) at 2005-03-10 14:04:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Damn You .. I almost cried at work
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2005-03-10 14:02:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Reading your explanation below, I'm reminded of how my boy used to run up to me and yell "Play with me!". If I was busy, he would just stand there yelling "Play with me! Play with me!..." until I dropped what I was doing.
Submitted by yourawhore (user info) at 2005-03-10 13:33:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
moving
Submitted by Darshiscool (user info) at 2005-03-10 12:45:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
amazing. you brought a tear to my eye. i guess i'm not as apathetic as i thought, thank you.
Submitted by jumpinjellyfish (user info) at 2005-03-10 12:18:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Here is a +2 for you.
I couldn't read all of it because it hits too close to home.
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2005-03-10 11:47:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This is great writing.
Thank you.
Submitted by Satansgotsyphillis (user info) at 2005-03-10 11:41:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
now THIS was good
Submitted by Soley_Trinity (user info) at 2005-03-10 11:23:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
It's amazing when the love and concern for your child inspires you to do something great.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2005-03-10 11:08:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Thanks a lot, now I'm crying like a pussy.
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2005-03-10 10:47:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Teephphah (user info) at 2005-03-10 10:43:21 (#)
Ranking: 2
Talk about "continuing the psychic week here on Uber" . . .
This is eerily similar to a post that I have been working on for TWO WHOLE DAYS (without land in sight) in preparation for my upcoming C.U.N.T. submission. Of course, mine is much longer a whole lot wordier and probably the worse for all that, but still . . . the whole "play" thing in regards to such subjects . . . creepy.
Keep your voodoo off of me Mike.
Funny, I've been thinking about this post for at least two days. It was just a matter of how to put it into words.
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2005-03-10 10:44:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2005-03-10 10:26:05 (#)
Ranking: 1
Sorry Mike I wasn't clear, although he is the eldest the young boy is 5 the girl 10 and he is talking like a 40 year old.
Just my take on it.
(Must still be in C.U.N.T mode.)
Good post though.
Don't be sorry. Your point is well made. Thanks for the feedback.
Submitted by Teephphah (user info) at 2005-03-10 10:43:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Talk about "continuing the psychic week here on Uber" . . .
This is eerily similar to a post that I have been working on for TWO WHOLE DAYS (without land in sight) in preparation for my upcoming C.U.N.T. submission. Of course, mine is much longer a whole lot wordier and probably the worse for all that, but still . . . the whole "play" thing in regards to such subjects . . . creepy.
Keep your voodoo off of me Mike.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2005-03-10 10:29:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2005-03-10 10:26:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Sorry Mike I wasn't clear, although he is the eldest the young boy is 5 the girl 10 and he is talking like a 40 year old.
Just my take on it.
(Must still be in C.U.N.T mode.)
Good post though.
Submitted by Rocktsrgn (user info) at 2005-03-10 10:25:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by JohnGalt (user info) at 2005-03-10 10:00:54 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by InsoManiac (user info) at 2005-03-10 09:36:49 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by beancat (user info) at 2005-03-10 09:30:07 (#)
Ranking: 2
You made me cry at work.
Submitted by lizzard (user info) at 2005-03-10 10:24:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
the title threw me off, but wow.
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2005-03-10 10:15:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I will now give you all some background as to why I wrote this.
I was sleeping the other night and my five year old was sleeping next to me. He woke up crying and screaming from a nightmare. I tried to wake him up, but it was difficult to get him to come out of it. He opened his eyes and I could see the terror that he was going through. He reached both hands up to his head and held them there as if trying to hold his head together.
I asked him what was wrong and he looked at me and said,
"I only want to play with you."
His pupils were huge.
I continued to try and calm him down and was getting very worried about him. He went back to sleep after a few minutes and an hour later the same exact thing happened. This time I finally got him to wake up and he told me that he had a dream that his mom and I died. He was upset because he didn't get to play with us before it happened.
Man, kids will make you age in the blink of an eye.
He only wanted to play with us.
Submitted by Sassmasterr (user info) at 2005-03-10 10:07:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i expected this to be a post by Michael "BigMike" Jackson to some children
my mind is so warped
Submitted by JohnGalt (user info) at 2005-03-10 10:00:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by InsoManiac (user info) at 2005-03-10 09:36:49 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by beancat (user info) at 2005-03-10 09:30:07 (#)
Ranking: 2
You made me cry at work.
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2005-03-10 10:00:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2005-03-10 09:53:37 (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm still afraid of you.
I can't imagine why.
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2005-03-10 09:58:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2005-03-10 09:51:31 (#)
Ranking: 1
"I will never forget you father. You taught me well. The baseball field was our shrine, the ghosts of October our God's. You will be with me on the field now and forever. I will always love you." The rose placed horizontally across the fine wood finish, he could see the dew reflecting sunlight off of the petals. He walked away head down, feet dragging, tears adding to the moisture of the mid-morning grass. """
Children don't talk like that.
This was the oldest son, mind you. Kids do say things sometimes that are quite eye opening. I know mine do. Each child here says something that reflects the level of their maturity. After all, we are all somebody's child are we not?
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2005-03-10 09:53:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm still afraid of you.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2005-03-10 09:51:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
"I will never forget you father. You taught me well. The baseball field was our shrine, the ghosts of October our God's. You will be with me on the field now and forever. I will always love you." The rose placed horizontally across the fine wood finish, he could see the dew reflecting sunlight off of the petals. He walked away head down, feet dragging, tears adding to the moisture of the mid-morning grass. """
Children don't talk like that.
Submitted by InsoManiac (user info) at 2005-03-10 09:36:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by beancat (user info) at 2005-03-10 09:30:07 (#)
Ranking: 2
You made me cry at work.
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2005-03-10 09:36:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Also, I was wondering if you'd read my last post. I think it's still on the front page. "About an old friend". I don't want to linkwhore here, but I'd really like to know what you think about it, the writing and the concepts explored.
Submitted by Jay_Bassman (user info) at 2005-03-10 09:32:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Fuck you... you made me cry.
Honestly, this was, as DeathJester said, phenomenal. I wish I could write like that... to have the ability to envoke emotions purely in writing like the emotions you pulled out of me just then. I wish, I wish...
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2005-03-10 09:32:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This hit too close to home for me to make a comment worth reading.
I miss my grandmother.
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2005-03-10 09:31:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by beancat (user info) at 2005-03-10 09:30:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You made me cry at work.
Submitted by wookie (user info) at 2005-03-10 09:27:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I only want two things out of life: 1) my son to out-live me, and 2) for him to be well into adulthood, middle-aged even, before I die.
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2005-03-10 09:22:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I am in awe of your writing ability.
Phenomenal.