Partying Hard or Waking Up in Someone Else's Bed Next to a Fat Chick (798 hits)
Category: GeneralRating: 1.79 on 20 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by The Foodman (View user info) at 2005-03-12 02:51:29 EST
Last night, I was sitting here at my computer chair chatting with some friends on the instant messenger. Suddenly, my door burst open and two girls came in to drag me away. It was Irena, the slim, attractive, and russian girlfriend of one of my squadmembers and her slightly fat german friend Silvia. Before I could resist, they had me in Wiles' room pounding the liquor and smoking the tobacco.
Drinking games went on for hours. I was like Ron White from the 'Blue Collar Comedy Tour'...Cigarettes and booze never left my hands. People fell out and we'd dry hump them and take pictures. A few guys even got some lip-gloss painted on their faces. I was feeling a bit frisky and started petting the girls. I like to give them names like 'Fluffy', 'Spot', and 'Moof'. They were so drunk no one seemed to care, and neither did I. It's a mystery to me how I held out for so long.
Eventually, the party wound down, and we all left Wiles and Irena to go at it. The party shifted to Bogard's room and didn't last long.I couldn't go back to my room because my roommate was entertaining his ladyfriend, so I insisted on laying at the hottie Jasmine's feet like a dog. I would bark and protect her like Lassie or Rin-tin-tin, thought I. It was not to be, though, and she made me sleep on the other bed.
Not long after I layed down there, Silvia, the fat girl came in and needed lodging. "Hier kommen sie", I called seductively. "You may find respite here, in my arms." She gave me a doubtful look, but conceded.
"I'll get my things." She returned a few moments later and dropped her personal effects off at the foot of the bed. Still feeling a might bit frisky, I grabbed her and pulled her onto the bed.
"I'm harmless, I promise you." She once again gave me a look like she didn't want to be there. I believe I called her 'Patches' in a petting session earlier in the evening. She still seemed affected by my weirdness. I can't imagine why. She took the blanket. I playfully whispered to her for several minutes. "Hi Silvia. What's going on, Silvia? I like you Silvia. You're fun and soft." I passed out.
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My eyes slowly came into half-focus in the dim light of the German dawn. I could see something round and pink. It was a big hooter clad in a pink sweater. Silvia's hooter, my mind recalled. The gears in my head were spinning slowly, as was every piece of my consciousness. I had wrapped my arms and legs around her body like she was one of those delightful body pillows. My head rested on her other hooter, equally clad in pink, and soft and warm. This girl was an amazing pillow.
Up until this morning, my experiences had been exlusively with females of the thinner variety. A comfort to have near, for sure, but not nearly as comfortable as a fat chick.
Bless you, Silvia, for being soft and warm and hootery.
User Reviews
Submitted by Hatch (user info) at 2005-03-15 01:58:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
My head rested on her other hooter, equally clad in pink, and soft and warm. This girl was an amazing pillow.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2005-03-14 15:01:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
soft and pink, just like your peener
Submitted by CookieLass (user info) at 2005-03-14 12:50:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Jungle_Jimanee (user info) at 2005-03-14 11:45:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hootery
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2005-03-14 11:40:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Love isn't hopeless. Look, maybe I'm no expert on the subject, but there
was one time I got it right.
-- Homer Simpson
Another Simpson's Clip Show
Submitted by tidalfae (user info) at 2005-03-14 11:23:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Haha hootery.
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2005-03-12 19:47:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hootery.
Submitted by Avals (user info) at 2005-03-12 14:13:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
DescriptionS. Descriptions! Fuck.
Here, have another +2 on the house. Like she was one of those delightful body pillows indeed.
Submitted by Avals (user info) at 2005-03-12 14:11:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Your description cracked me up. Seriously dude.
Submitted by hungovermondays (user info) at 2005-03-12 11:17:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"Hier kommen sie", I called seductively. "You may find respite here, in my arms."
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i really liked this line
Submitted by Socialist_Joe (user info) at 2005-03-12 11:02:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
drink
Submitted by Ivy (user info) at 2005-03-12 08:07:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Awww, that's cute. Warm and soft and hootery? That's sounds uber comf.
Submitted by williamson (user info) at 2005-03-12 07:15:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ah breasts. The reason i get up in the morning (pun!).
Submitted by mrwolf (user info) at 2005-03-12 06:57:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
So you didn't shag her then?
Submitted by mikethescottish (user info) at 2005-03-12 06:08:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for the unexpected, non-vicious ending.
Submitted by Wazza (user info) at 2005-03-12 05:49:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ha ha ha ha Well there you go man .
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2005-03-12 03:21:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
made me smile actually, but +2 anyway
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2005-03-12 03:04:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Awww, that's so sweet! I bet if you asked her nicely, she'd bake a yummy German Torte for you.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-03-12 03:02:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by SiskelandFatboy (user info) at 2005-03-12 03:00:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Lemme get this straight?
Nevermind.
Good read though