Projectile Vegas (880 hits)
Category: NoneLabels: uber
Rating: 1.81 on 22 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Corn Nugget (View user info) at 2005-03-15 09:18:38 EST
(I'm such a hypocrite- I SWORE I would not post an ubervegas post, but look- I just got home and I'm posting one. I have no will power)
But lets get to the vomit story, shall we? After a crazy weekend of drinking and sleeping, I decided Sunday would be a "rest" day. No drinks all day.
This was a good idea. My hangover wasn't too bad, I didn't have a headache or a stomach ache, I just had the "boring". The boring (for those of you who don't know) is when you have absolutely NOTHING to say, and all you can do is focus on the lack of entertainment you are providing. Josie got to witness this first hand at dinner that night.
I didn't eat much all weekend (which was probably a bad idea, but hey... oh well), but I couldn't resist a slice of pizza. After sopping up all the grease with my napkin and yelling at my errant pepperonis for falling off, I ate it.
Okay, I only ate HALF of it, and Shiloh finished it... but, that's totally not relevant. After expending all of my energy eating those three bites of pizza, it was time to rest.
So we're up in the room, watching tv, and chilling. I still felt fine... I would go as far as to say that I felt GOOD.
Then I felt it. When your mouth starts to water and your lips purse up, and you know it's going to happen. I tried talking myself out of it. I sipped some water. I paced around the room.
But my puke had no mercy.
I quickly ran for the bathroom and started hugging the toilet. I was trying to be quiet in order to avoid any of that, "Oh my god, Corinne, are you okay? Should I hold your hair while you barf? Ohhh you poor thing, etc etc etc " stuff.
Have you ever tried to puke quietly? I considered turning the water on, to mask the sound, but just as I started to get up to do that, it came.
Ohhhh did it come.
It was like those geysers at Yellowstone. I almost missed the toilet.
"Hey, are you okay? Corinne, are you all right?"
"Ughhhhhhhhhhyeaaaahhhhh"
"Are you sure? Are you okay?"
"Yeah." oh please please don't open the door and see me here with my legs wrapped around the toilet, tears streaming down my face, and puke in my nose.
He didn't. Thank God for that, because it wasn't a pretty sight.
I swear- there was a whole pepperoni floating around in the toilet when I was done.
Now here's some random shit about everyone that was there:
Val (Urbane)- While everyone else went to get Chinese food, she, Shiloh and I sat at the Garden Bar and talked. She told me the story of how she cracked her head open on the table the night before while trying to demonstrate how strap ons worked. Then she said she wasn't going to drink that night, because she wanted us to see the "real" her, and not the "boobs in your face sex sex sex crazy loud" her. That lasted, what, an hour? Ah well, "real" is over-rated!
Doug (1.21)- Even after I spent the entire night hating on him, he STILL bought me a drink. I guess that's a true testament to how nice he really is. Sorry Doug- I'm an asshole sometimes. Thanks for the drink.
Terry (EatMeCompletely)- The biggest surprise of the weekend. He "Tries to be a nice guy", and he IS a nice guy, and HILARIOUS. I totally loved this dude, plus he can SING. He can even sing LOUD while walking down the street in the middle of the day. Plus, how can I not love a guy who told me that I was his Brown Eyed Girl?
Sean (Sean Fogy)- The first person I met in Vegas, he greeted me with a big hug and "COOOORN NUGGET!!!!!!!!!!!" and I said, "Who the hell are you?". We proceeded to get lost in the labyrinth hallways of the Flamin Go. At one point we just gave up and sat down to smoke. Shiloh had to rescue us.
Aj- I love you dude. Thanks for fronting me that plane ticket... I couldn't have gone without your help and encouragement. Sorry I talked about Leagues with you (tee hee).
Bart- The only guy who has ever told me to STOP talking, then turned around and started playing grab-boob games with me. Dirty Whore. Now shhhhh...
Josie (AlwaysAnEagle)- She's got a genuine great personality. The type of person you'd tell your life story to and you'd feel like she UNDERSTOOD you, even if she didn't.
Monty (godchicken)- He's bad and naughty, with a little sweet thrown in.
Nicole- This girl seems very innocent and sweet, but she's not. She's VERY bad. One of the funniest things of the whole weekend was our stroll through the casino. Nicole would randomly hit on men that were sitting next to their wives/girlfriends, "John? No... No... Paul? Paul?! Oh my god!! I had a great time last weekend... wow, I didn't expect to see you here!". Holy Fucking Funny. She really surprised me at how great and awesome she was.
Loren- What a classic beauty. She's confident, smart, sweet, and gorgeous.
Jared (JMG)- I hardly talked to him all weekend! I already knew he was hella-funny and great, I just didn't get to hang out with him enough in Vegas.
Rizzo- What a sweet guy. Plus he has rock hard abs. And he has style. Did I mention how sweet he is?
Tim- I wish I coulda hung out with Tim more. He was constantly telling jokes and entertaining everyone.
Paula (Munkey) and Katie (TigerLilly)- They must have been on exact opposite sleeping schedules than I was- I barely saw either one of them the whole weekend. I heard lots of stories involving boobs at the bar, though.
Scott (Flack)- He wore his ribbon-things-from-the-army-or-whatever pinned to his t-shirt. That cracked me up for no reason at all. He was walking down the strip just being randomly loud and funny.
Jay- I think we only talked for 1.5 seconds, so...? I dunno.
Shiloh (ScreemFeeder)- Ummm... he rocks more than he should. Way more. I shoulda known he'd be great since when we met he was laying on the floor in the hotel hallway whining about how heavy his bag was while denying the possible influence of tequila in his inablity to function properly. Then he made drunk ass Sean carry the bag. It was all uphill from there.
Alright, that's all I've got.
User Reviews
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-03-16 10:50:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by 1Point21Gigawatts (user info) at 2005-03-16 10:36:00 (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm not such a bad guy...
--
Not at all *wink* *wink*
Submitted by 1Point21Gigawatts (user info) at 2005-03-16 10:36:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm not such a bad guy...
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2005-03-16 09:41:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Bart- it went like this:
Corinne- "blah blah blah blah drunken ramblings blah blah blah blah"
Bart- "All I want to know is when you're going to stop talking"
Corinne- "... What?" <walks away>
Bart- <sly smile> PINCH NIPPLES PINCH NIPPLES
Corinne- "I can't believe you said that to me!" <pinch back>
Etc
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-03-16 08:20:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Paula (Munkey) and Katie (TigerLilly)- They must have been on exact opposite sleeping schedules than I was- I barely saw either one of them the whole weekend. I heard lots of stories involving boobs at the bar, though.
------------------
wait. hold up. just read this again...
... did I???? Did I at least get any beads?
Submitted by bart (user info) at 2005-03-16 02:48:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I did not tell you to stop talking!
I had fun harassing you, but try not to pinch so hard next time.
Submitted by screamfeeder (user info) at 2005-03-16 00:23:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
What is that bird doing way out there?
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2005-03-15 21:09:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Monty- don't act like you dont know what I'm talking about.
Looking forward to it, Terry.
AJ- HA HA HA I MISS YOU TOO!
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2005-03-15 19:05:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
God, I miss you fuckers.
Submitted by EatMeCompletely (user info) at 2005-03-15 18:53:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You sure know how to make a guy feel good. I will be calling Detroit in the near future for you to give me more insight into the deepest recesses of my soul. When my pics are developed, I'll be emailing them to everyone. Talk to you soon. First to puke my ass. Yeah, I didn't forget that. *hugs*
T
Submitted by AlwaysAnEagle (user info) at 2005-03-15 18:04:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Yay for Corinne!
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-03-15 11:32:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You are a complete sweetie pie and I am glad that I had the chance to meet you!
Submitted by GodChicken (user info) at 2005-03-15 11:14:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I'm what?
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-03-15 11:09:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"Thank God for human nature. And thank god for those humans who exhibit it."
this sums up my sentiments towards all of you.
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-03-15 11:08:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by MyNameIsTim (user info) at 2005-03-15 10:00:39 (#)
Ranking: 2
i enjoyed your company very much in the (unfortunately) limited time we hung out. I'm glad you enjoyed my late night antics, for which i am not proud to be known for.
---------------------------------------
tim, i think my funniest memories came from you. you are priceless.
Submitted by Nicole3 (user info) at 2005-03-15 10:43:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You know what your problem was? You tried to eat something other than $2.95 breakfast specials at 6 am before crashing for the night. I swear when I got out of the restaurant at 7 am on Sunday so see nothing but sunlight realizing that I had to check out in 4 hours I almost passed out. Of course it may have been the alcohol.
Submitted by fudgepacker (user info) at 2005-03-15 10:27:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i love all these shout-outs and stories and everything...they're all marvelous and peachy.
but dammit, when are the pictures coming?
Submitted by MyNameIsTim (user info) at 2005-03-15 10:00:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i enjoyed your company very much in the (unfortunately) limited time we hung out. I'm glad you enjoyed my late night antics, for which i am not proud to be known for.
rock and roll c-rin.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2005-03-15 09:54:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
no sex stories?
Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2005-03-15 09:48:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by UrbaneMischief (user info) at 2005-03-15 09:37:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i love you Corn.
whenever you're ready, I have a couple of rabbits over here for Shiloh. You bring the ice cream scoop.
Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2005-03-15 09:31:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
poor jay.
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-03-15 09:23:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
YES! I WASN'T THE FIRST TO PUKE AT AN UBERCON! WOOOOO!