Ubercon Las Vegas: The Lurkers (2202 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.76 on 71 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Crystle (View user info) at 2005-03-16 17:35:41 EST
Sigh. Well, I was forced into it. Ubercon Las Vegas: The Lurkers. Which means I have officially blown my cover as a professional lurker. Taking one for the team here!
While the Uber cool people stayed at the Flaming and the alters stayed at the El Cortez Hotel, there was no centralized location for the Uber lurkers. We stayed at any hotel that happened to have a room vacant when we arrived. We didn't coordinate meal times, many of us opting to eat anonymously in our rooms. When room service is as good as than McDonalds, what more do you need? The UberLurker Con was actually larger than the "Official" UberCon, but being by nature lurkers, we didn't feel the need to make ourselves known - even to our fellow lurkers. Subsequently, most of our Vegas stories will never be told. Risking my ability to associate with my fellow lurkers, I have to admit that we were pretty much every where.
To maximize our skulking capabilities, we'd disguise ourselves. The Japanese tourists? At least two of them were Uberlurkers. The cocktail waitress that just seemed to take too long at the table next to yours? An Uberlurker - silently observing everything in order to chuckle to herself when she was back in her room. The old drunk guy at the craps table that couldn't take his eyes off your chest? Yup, ...one of the porn addict lurkers. He particularly enjoyed Urbane Mischief's explanation of a strap-on, and through the lurkers network has requested that you post pictures? If pictures of the actual incident are not available, please recreate them - preferably naked?
You may ask who some the other Uberlurkers were, and although this goes against the grain, I'm going to disclose some identities: The chatty basketball player in the bathroom that provoked the now infamous fadeaway by MyNameIsTim. The Iowa girls. The Southern Belle on the plane with the drink tickets. The middle aged women with the slightly horrified face as Bart was yelling "WHAT?!?!?! SHE WAS COLD!!!!" The balloon artist - and he requests that you stop with the disparagement of his career. He has studied long and hard to be able to make balloon penises so realistic. (Seriously, cut the guy a break!)
I'm getting tossed out of the lurkers association now. I already miss my warm quiet fuzzy anonymity...
User Reviews
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2009-04-26 19:04:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
WTF Below??!?!
Submitted by YourNameHere (user info) at 2009-04-26 18:45:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-09-25 15:06:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2007-09-25 14:22:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
nice work out of the gate crystle. good first post noob.
Submitted by MudWhistle (user info) at 2007-09-25 14:47:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
lets make rape
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2007-09-25 14:22:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
nice work out of the gate crystle. good first post noob.
Submitted by ShapeShifter (user info) at 2007-08-30 17:27:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Stagger_Lee (user info) at 2006-10-05 04:07:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This was your first post, eh? I like it.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-10-05 03:42:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
this was brilliant
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2006-07-05 20:00:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
bollocks.
Submitted by Viciousriffs (user info) at 2005-07-07 21:50:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Guess I read this in Orlando, and never came back to rate.
Here! I worship your feet, but not massage them....
I'm a prick.
Submitted by creep_firebombing (user info) at 2005-05-16 14:03:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Fucking funny and creative.
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2005-05-09 02:43:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2005-03-16 19:10:33 (#)
Ranking: 2
So who was the black hooker in the red shorts?
That was an undercover cop...
And he wants your number.
Submitted by Rawrg (user info) at 2005-05-09 02:28:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
God I was drunk that night...
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2005-05-04 23:23:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Aw.. thanks Don!
Submitted by DonovanMD (user info) at 2005-05-04 08:50:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I thought I'd rated this already. I remember reading it.
Oh well, +2.
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2005-05-04 08:47:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HAHA clever
Submitted by funk_boy (user info) at 2005-05-04 08:33:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
this f'ing stinks of originality
bravo.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-04-28 03:46:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2005-03-16 19:10:33 (#)
Ranking: 2
So who was the black hooker in the red shorts?
==============================================
My mom.
She says "Hi", and "Get checked for crabs."
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2005-04-28 03:28:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Good idea
Submitted by BoogieFevuh (user info) at 2005-04-26 00:03:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I like!
Submitted by mrwolf (user info) at 2005-04-09 03:24:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Very nice. Very original.
Submitted by williamson (user info) at 2005-04-06 21:02:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Honestly the Best First Post ever.
Now you're kind of in the shadow-world. Somewhere between uber and lurkdom. Come out into the light Crystile.
Submitted by CanucksFan (user info) at 2005-04-05 20:11:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I think that may be it..good job, nobody at my work or school that I asked could figure it out, including a few teachers.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2005-03-17 20:16:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Merci Caulin
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2005-03-17 20:08:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
original first post
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2005-03-17 19:56:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Hmmm.. I'll have to ponder that for a while, Shlongy
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-03-17 14:06:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
So? How's that stopping you?
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2005-03-17 13:59:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
great!
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2005-03-17 13:47:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Shlongy - if only you didn't say that to all the girls.
Rawrg - huh? But thanks.. I guess..
And thanks to the rest of you too (They like me! they REALLY like me! {sob})
Saxon - I'll try to stay out of the closet
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-03-17 12:48:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
hahahaha!
Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2005-03-17 08:02:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
BEST FIRST POST EVAR!!!!!!!11
Submitted by Rawrg (user info) at 2005-03-17 02:31:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
JUQAINEAAS MOTHER FUCKER!!!
Submitted by Rawrg (user info) at 2005-03-17 02:30:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Gangsters are pussies. I wish I coulc've killed all teh vice lord... ok I'M OUT BIATCH!!! sorry if I harmed rating, I'll post another +42 ... ah hell, juqaineaas!!!
Submitted by Rawrg (user info) at 2005-03-17 02:29:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
How about them LA rioters too? I'd a shot em all. But I wouldn't have given them chocolate, cause then they'd a fucked some people up, uh?
Submitted by Rawrg (user info) at 2005-03-17 02:28:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Thar be dragons, and fuck RODNEY KING. Fucker deserved to get beat.
Submitted by Rawrg (user info) at 2005-03-17 02:27:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh whatever, I'm shooting from the hip right now.
Submitted by Rawrg (user info) at 2005-03-17 02:27:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Drunk Drunk Drunk is fun...
Submitted by Rawrg (user info) at 2005-03-17 02:25:20 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Why not change the name of the site to UBERCON.COM?!?!?!? I don't give a shit, nor does anyone else.
Submitted by Saxon (user info) at 2005-03-17 01:50:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hahaha this was clever. you can stay out of the closet now.
Submitted by Zoidberg (user info) at 2005-03-16 22:48:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Joemama (user info) at 2005-03-16 21:20:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Good One
Submitted by Kre8rix (user info) at 2005-03-16 21:19:35 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
not bad indeed.
Welcome, anyone that can use the term 'vocal inflection' in the correct context is cool by me.
Though being 'cool by me' is not as popular as one would hope.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-03-16 20:56:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Yeah, blow me.
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-03-16 20:48:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
There you go.
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-03-16 20:48:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This was actually clever. And it had paragraphs. And it made a substantial nod at accepted conventions of grammar. You get a +4.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2005-03-16 20:06:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
:hangs head: Yeah, ETS, I know they weren't technically questions - I was trying to convey vocal inflection.
As to the other.. Why not? YEAH!
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2005-03-16 19:57:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Not a bad first post. Although, for the record, neither of the following sentences are questions:
"Yup, ...one of the porn addict lurkers. He particularly enjoyed Urbane Mischief's explanation of a strap-on, and through the lurkers network has requested that you post pictures?"
"If pictures of the actual incident are not available, please recreate them - preferably naked?"
Nice to meet you though...
wanna be one of my ho's?
http://www.ubersite.com/m/62082
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2005-03-16 19:39:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Jonny - 10-4
boneface - ooops, I hadn't read that yet..Thought I was actually thinking on my own.
Submitted by MANICMOTHER (user info) at 2005-03-16 19:37:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
My god, you got a positive rate from the Shlongman? I am impressed.
+1 for ya honey, I gotta do at least as well as he did.
Bravo!
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2005-03-16 19:33:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2005-03-16 18:58:00 (#)
Ranking: 0
Johnny - I should have linked to you in the post!
____
I tell you what, you could RATE my post, I'd be cool with that.
Submitted by boneface (user info) at 2005-03-16 19:31:29 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
http://www.ubersite.com/m/62001#1207296
what the fuck? nice idea...
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2005-03-16 19:17:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
wait... I'm not black... or a hooker...
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2005-03-16 19:15:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Tim, nice to meet you.. I'm Deb.
Jay, uh, that was me?
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2005-03-16 19:10:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
So who was the black hooker in the red shorts?
Submitted by MyNameIsTim (user info) at 2005-03-16 19:09:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
well done.
i figure since you mentioned me in your post, we should make our acquantances.
hello, my name is tim.
whats yours?
Submitted by bart (user info) at 2005-03-16 19:08:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2005-03-16 18:58:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Johnny - I should have linked to you in the post!
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2005-03-16 18:51:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
well, if this isn't an opportunity to linkwhore, I dont know what is...
http://www.ubersite.com/m/62066
Submitted by L-Gizzle (user info) at 2005-03-16 18:39:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
one of the best first posts i've seen in a long time
Submitted by Mister_Fahrenheit (user info) at 2005-03-16 18:32:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Dannie (user info) at 2005-03-16 18:10:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Snort.
Submitted by kai070169 (user info) at 2005-03-16 17:56:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
here have one
Submitted by wookie (user info) at 2005-03-16 17:54:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Clever.
Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2005-03-16 17:53:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
cool
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2005-03-16 17:53:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
zakalwe - check, check - yup, I do.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-03-16 17:52:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2005-03-16 17:50:12 (#)
Ranking: 0
Thank you all :-) And WOW... a POSITIVE from Schlongy? Someday I'll be perfect, but it'll take good constructive editors to help get me there.
---
Blow him. you'll get your +2.
Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2005-03-16 17:50:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
so...you have tits?
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2005-03-16 17:50:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Thank you all :-) And WOW... a POSITIVE from Schlongy? Someday I'll be perfect, but it'll take good constructive editors to help get me there.
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2005-03-16 17:48:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Excellent for a first post
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-03-16 17:43:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Willkommen miene Fraulien.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-03-16 17:42:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Not bad...not perfect. But a fine idea.