Jesus is Real, I Saw Him Last Night At the Bottom of A Bar Glass (892 hits)
Category: Quotes & StoriesRating: 1.85 on 16 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by someone (View user info) at 2005-03-23 19:08:57 EST
Part One-http://www.ubersite.com/m/61335
Notes: http://www.ubersite.com/m/61814 AND http://www.ubersite.com/m/62078 (ignore the format on this one, it's supposed to read like the others, despite the fact that the format is fucked)
Part Two:
I found Jesus at the bottom of a glass of beer, and he told me to have one more, so I reached into my wallet and grabbed a crumbled five dollar bill and practically threw it at the bartender. All I want is peace, but my mind is broken and my heart is colder then stone. There's this cute lesbian twenty-something beside me, whispering in my ear and kissing me on the cheek. Four years without cock, just fingers fingers fingers, and I can tell that this Saturday will change her outlook, or maybe not. I can, however, tell you this: my mind was and still is swimming in alcohol so I downed the beer and walked outside in the cold and lit up a cigarette. I watched the smoke form at my fingertips and waft up into the clear air and away from the dingy college bar. I followed the smoke and saw my ancestors looking down at me telling me to Take it Easy, but fuck them, they're dead and I'll soon be beside them saying the same thing to a twenty something prick smoking a cigarette, drunk outside a college bar. All Jack Kerouac left me with is the self-destruction and fractured mind, but no writing skills, that's obviously apparent in this rambling mess with no coherence, no rhyme and no pattern. A chaotic mess.
It's precisely 6:53 pm as I write this, and I have three hours or so to go before I hit another bar and feel the alcohol hit the nervous system and slowly dissipate all rational thought. It's better this way, I tell myself that every day now. Every day with a smaller bank account and diminishing health, every day with school papers half finished, every day with just a few more tears dripping unnoticed into an ever growing bar glass. Every day with Darwin whispering in my ear, telling me that it's survival of the fittest in this game of cell phones and palm pilots, and I'm not keeping up as well as I used to.
Press enter twice on the keyboard and create a new paragraph, a new start to a stale plate of ideas and ideals. Double space after a sentence to blow the readers mind, a comma to make them pause, think, and then finish the fractured sentence and start all over again. There's a pattern, a subconscious rhythmic structure, but as much as I tried to read into it and keep my eyes open, I realized that sometimes, and most often, a cigar is simply a cigar.
Take life at face value, and force a smile and keep all eyes on you at all times, have them try to anticipate your next move and then do preciously the opposite, for the sole purpose of spite if nothing else. I'm to young to be that predictable, so I just have to be one step ahead and one dollar short, I'll throw you an I.O.U. and tell you to meet me in San Diego, and from there we can fire up motorcycles, cars and joints, wrapped tight In God We Trust, oh, and don't forget the cocaine and gallons of booze, we need to hold tight and stay calm, or else we'll lose before even beginning. What madness do I speak of?
The madness is, of course, a realization caused by obsessive paranoid thought, the thought of my life counting down by the year, the month, the week, the hour, the second, and every punch of e-v-e-r-y key is a lost moment, bookmarked in history books that will never be published or read, and will burn in fires that are lit by wet matches and are never hot or bright. Fuck it, it's about time.
User Reviews
Submitted by Freight_Train (user info) at 2005-04-03 16:47:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
meh
Submitted by DavyJones (user info) at 2005-03-27 17:08:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by someone (user info) at 2005-03-27 16:55:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Conform (user info) at 2005-03-27 15:34:27 (#)
Ranking: 2
I love your writing style.
====
Quite possibly the best username ever.
Submitted by Conform (user info) at 2005-03-27 15:34:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I love your writing style.
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-03-25 16:21:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Smoothe (user info) at 2005-03-24 10:23:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I really like your writing, keep it up. Though I don't think I've read much or your stuff before.
Submitted by Saxon (user info) at 2005-03-24 01:51:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
There's this cute lesbian twenty-something beside me, whispering in my ear and kissing me on the cheek. Four years without cock, just fingers fingers fingers, and I can tell that this Saturday will change her outlook, or maybe not.
Great passage. good work.
Submitted by the_lone_stranger (user info) at 2005-03-24 01:07:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I just stumbled across this. Haven't read the others. I'm about to!
Submitted by someone (user info) at 2005-03-24 00:08:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Yes!! A man and a lesbian love me! Shitfuck--Me and you will be chatting sometime soon. I'm thinking it's about time to blow the world and it's collective mind(s).
Submitted by DanielH (user info) at 2005-03-23 23:52:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I kinda lov you, but gotta go. Will read t-morrow./. Freak, i like you. later.
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2005-03-23 22:19:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
'All Jack Kerouac left me with is the self-destruction and fractured mind, but no writing skills, that's obviously apparent in this rambling mess with no coherence, no rhyme and no pattern. A chaotic mess. '
There's truth in chaos. None in order.
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2005-03-23 22:18:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
My email.
JDLavender.at.hotmail.com
Submitted by kcthelush (user info) at 2005-03-23 21:51:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Deep & thought provoking.
Submitted by JML (user info) at 2005-03-23 19:52:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
well done.
Submitted by L-Gizzle (user info) at 2005-03-23 19:18:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"I realized that sometimes, and most often, a cigar is simply a cigar."
until you gut it and fill it with weed
Submitted by AnotherStupidUsername (user info) at 2005-03-23 19:12:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Finally!!