The Life and Times of ME or Yes, I Am a Narcissistic Bitch (3643 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.7 on 99 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Kristen (View user info) at 2005-03-29 23:07:41 EST
Deuteronomy 1:34-"If ye do not care about random Über user updates from random Über user members, then click ye back button."
Consider that fair warning.
Damn, y'all. What a difference a year makes! Just twelve months ago, I was a single bitch who was self-absorbed, watched too much Nick at Nite, and flossed MORE than 4 out of 5 dentists recommend. The winds of change blew me on my ass and I'm now a self-absorbed bitch who watches too much Nick at Nite and goes through fifty yards of mint floss every other day.
Wait.
A year ago, I was a working single gal. I was living in Louisiana with my best friend. I had just finished up a stint as a legal guardian to a 3-year-old boy and was adjusting to the news that I was to endure six more months of housing a fetus before being thrust into the never-ending gig of parenting. I spent approximately two hours bathing, primping, and showering every day; twice a day if I was going out that night! I wore silks and satins and linen. I wore towering stiletto heels and long, dangly jewelry. I went out to eat in real restaurants...okay, at least ones without a Drive Thru.
Times, they are a-changin'.
I am now the proud (synonymous with exhausted, unbathed, and deliriously happy) parent of a baby girl, who will be seven months old in April. I spend approximately ten minutes a day getting ready to face the general public, five minutes of which is spent flossing. Yeah, I've really got to get a new vice...that stringy, minty goodness will be the end of me. I've got about two inches of root growth belying my "natural" hair color. I smelled onions all day on Easter Sunday and realized I spent so much time gathering Emily's silky blond hair into a ponytail that I forgot to put some Ban on. I stay in most Friday and Saturday nights. A five minute trip to the grocery store takes an hour to prepare for.
Gone is my hot-to trot roommate and subsequently my nightly pillow fights. Instead, I'm hosting my seventy-year-old grandmother in a room down the hall. You haven't lived until you've stumbled into the kitchen after an endless night of soothing a teething baby, reached into your fridge for a bottle of orange juice, only to suck down some sickeningly syrupy prune juice instead. Or try flopping down a Jumbo package of large adult diapers right next to a Mega pack of size three Pampers.
I'm getting a house built in a small suburb of Orlando at the moment, as well. I never thought I'd be as interested in the building process as I am. In fact, I go to the lot every damn day to survey the progress. They got the roof up and they've got the drywall up, and I had to slap a nail out of my girl's hands before she ate it..."No-no, Grandma!"
I started dating a particular guy about three/four months ago. He kind of gave me the brush-off a month back and has since returned. I got stumbling, slurringly, nauseously drunk and ran into him. I guess the allure of a woman you've been intimate with regurgitating ground beef into your beer is too much for some men to pass up. He left me a little ditty along the lines of an almost too effeminate "I <3 U J xoxoxo" on my computer this morning. I turned on the screen and there it was, my first declaration of love from the guy. Who knew retching up dead cow was so appealing?
Finally, I had a little brawl with cancer recently. I had a little Frankenstein-esque lump on my throat. After some painful diagnostic testing, I was told that I had thyroid cancer. In particular, I was informed that I had Papillary thyroid cancer. I got to get my throat slit and was informed prior to the surgery that just one small slip of the scalpel could make me the perfect woman. I asked if one small slip of the scalpel would increase my bust size to a D cup, and was thusly told I could lose the ability to speak. Damn sexist doctors and their lame jokes. Needless to say, I was quite confident going under.
Thankfully, everything went perfectly. I'm still here, I still talk too much, and my boobs are still small.
Some things never change.
User Reviews
Submitted by ThatOneGirl (user info) at 2005-10-04 23:40:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
She's beautiful. Hope you come back!
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2005-05-06 15:19:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You changed your MVA name to Mrs. TheCaes. I think I just melted.
I have such a huge crush on you right now.
Submitted by Stin (user info) at 2005-04-26 21:50:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Keep on keepin' on, honey.
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2005-04-20 12:20:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Good Luck Kirsten. I was wondering who you were- when I first used to read there was a big Kirsten's Pregnant bandwaggon going on, and then you disappeared into real life. I'm glad things are working out for you.
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2005-04-13 23:42:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2005-04-12 23:12:45 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2005-04-12 21:37:58 (#)
Ranking: 2
Phoenix/volklcess is the Queen of the cliffhanger. I think you may be the King.
**************************
ALL HAIL KING ME!
Wait, I mean, King Caes!
Thanks, internet trophy wife! Now put on that dress I like so I can show you off to all my friends. ;)
Submitted by mrwolf (user info) at 2005-04-09 06:08:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Damned scrolling screen... I went through all the reviews to find the asshole that made your post difficult to read, to find it was you the author. Never mind. Cute kid, nice post, good teeth.
Submitted by Ivy (user info) at 2005-04-09 05:30:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow, your daughter's gorgeous! And you look great, I totally can't even see a scar.
Submitted by Soley_Trinity (user info) at 2005-04-09 04:58:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Your daughter is absolutely adorable.
I hope everything turns out rosey for you.
Submitted by hairycoo (user info) at 2005-04-09 04:42:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
mmm strong genes
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2005-04-06 16:08:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
americans defined in their beauty: http://www.ubersite.com/cgi-bin/message_get.cgi?message=1112732119125029229#1252100
Submitted by WiKi (user info) at 2005-04-05 18:54:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Jesus, she's cute as hell.
I found out a month ago that I'm pregnant. So.. around November, I'll be disappearing for a while, I'm sure.
Poo on nausea. Poo on it, I say!
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2005-04-04 01:35:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Just in case you don't go back to my post...
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2005-04-03 22:31:16 (#)
Ranking: 2
What the fuck, dude? You are soooooo getting married sex-you know, where I feign a headache and then relent long enough to let you do your two-pump jig before promptly rolling over to fall asleep.
*******************************
Score! That's WAY better than all the sex I'm not having now.
It would seem I suck at this. I think I need to do some research on how to juggle two girls at once. It's not like bowling pins or chainsaws.
Actually, it's a little like chainsaws.
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2005-04-02 11:20:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This was a nice little post, tracking your life as it changes. You seem to have a sense of humour and I like that.
Jesus Christ, you are gorgeous.
Submitted by Natophelia (user info) at 2005-04-02 01:14:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Well I'll be damned....
You can always tell when the hubby's away playing Army cuz I show up here for a post or two. Nice to "see" you, Kristen. HOLY SHIT I can't believe it's been long enough already for your baby to look like...you know...a baby! Instead of that little ball of sleeping stuff that they seem to be for the first...I dunno. However long. I still don't have kids!
I'm shocked at how grown up the baby is, and at the cancer. But I wouldn't worry one damned bit about that scar, if you can even call it that! I wouldn't have noticed it in the picture.
I rarely get online myself anymore. Every once in a while I talk to the chicken man, so I guess if you wanna say hi you can pass a message along through him (if that's okay, chicken?). I'll do the same (if I can ever remember to get on Yahoo IM!) and maybe we'll end up with each other's screen names or something :p I bet I won't see this post again or even come to Ubersite again for weeks/months!
Submitted by BongZilla (user info) at 2005-04-01 19:49:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I mean, I see a little bit of discoloration and maybe its due to being a photo, but it doesnt look that bad.
Submitted by BongZilla (user info) at 2005-04-01 19:48:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
damn, i can't lie, having a kid made you even hotter. on a side note, i cant even really see the scar youre talking about.
Submitted by MickGinny (user info) at 2005-04-01 19:14:47 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
oh yea, you look crrrrrazy.
Submitted by Phinch (user info) at 2005-04-01 17:48:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm glad things are going well Kristen.
Submitted by BillsSBChamps (user info) at 2005-03-31 23:27:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
More pics of lil Emily for me to play with.
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2005-03-31 19:59:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Lisa (user info) at 2005-03-31 14:14:25 (#)
Ranking: 2
"Don't worry, Kristen, it's a relatively safe procedure. The treatment is selective for your cancer, so there's virtually no way it could harm your body. Now, step inside this room, where no one without a space suit will approach you for the next three days."
----------------------------------------------------------------
AHAHAHAHAHAHA.
Yeah, I've definitely got to be more suspicious of the medical community.
Submitted by mystiamoon (user info) at 2005-03-31 17:50:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
nope, not boring, very informative actually. thank you.
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-03-31 15:51:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Your optimism is inspiring.
Submitted by Lisa (user info) at 2005-03-31 14:14:25 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"Don't worry, Kristen, it's a relatively safe procedure. The treatment is selective for your cancer, so there's virtually no way it could harm your body. Now, step inside this room, where no one without a space suit will approach you for the next three days."
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2005-03-31 13:53:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Mystia,
I've undergone one round of Radioactive Iodine Treatment (RIT) since my surgery in December. I have not required chemo or the sort of radiation you normally think of when you hear "cancer". Thyroid is the only cancer that can be treated by RIT. Even when it spreads, it remains "thyroid cancer", only it was "thyroid cancer in my lymph node". Thyroid cancer CAN spread to the lymph nodes and not make one iota of a difference in your survival rate, unlike every other form of cancer. RIT works because thyroid cells are the only cells that process iodine in your body. The radioactive iodine is sucked up by the malignant cells (which, since they originated from the thyroid, love idione) and kills them off. No other organs absorb the RI and so no other organs are affected. You just pee the excess out. People don't lose their hair from that treatment, they don't get sick from it (usually...I didn't), and it's not invasive whatsoever. Basically I went to the hospital for three days, was placed in isolation (which has been the absolute worst part of this experience thus far, aside from getting my pee and poo taken away in little red hazard bags-that part was pretty nifty.) and was released. I have to go back and get scans done, but I'm pretty confident that I'm fine. At my age, they think that my cancer was actually brought on by the hormonal changes during pregnancy and subsequent delivery. I guess my lil lobes couldn't hack it. :o) Was that boring?
Last year I had to have my gallbladder out. This had nothing to do with that. That sucked, though.
Phallic, I'm sorry. If you want these teeth, you're gonna have to come get them yourself.
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2005-03-31 06:19:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I want your teeth.
PO Box 617
Wollongong
Australia
I'll pay postage, but make the jar thin.
Submitted by mystiamoon (user info) at 2005-03-31 05:44:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hey, chicky!!
WOW!!! What a rollercoaster ride of a year you had, eh?
It's great that you are in good health again.
Do they have any idea what might cause thyroid cancer at such a young age?
If the cancer had spread how was it you managed to escape with your hair and beauty still in tact, I mean, you look totally vibrant in that photo. You didn't require chemo or radiation to treat a spreading cancer? That is AMAZING!
I'm just asking out of curiousity, science and medicine are my passions and I love hearing about peoples experiences. Didn't you also write a post awhile back about going to a drug store after a different operation? Were they related at all?
You don't have to answer if you aren't comfortable sharing so much info, or if you don't want to reply here feel free to shoot me an e-mail at mystiamoon.at.yahoo.com or catch me on AIM
P.s. Emily is gorgeous and I'm super jealous that you get to live within driving distance of Disney World.
P.s.s. Glad to hear that I seem to have been wrong about the type of guy your boyfriend is.(in reference to the post you wrote about him dumping you and my response to his behavior)
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2005-03-31 02:41:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2005-03-30 17:38:00 (#)
Ranking: 0
Apollo, you just want me to get drunk so I can't relay to the other women and Shandy the exact size of your peener. Your crystal sham is up. """
CURSES!!!
Another plan FOILED. FOILED I tells ya.
Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2005-03-31 00:01:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
You are yesterday's news. Welcome to old age.
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2005-03-30 22:28:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Mick,
Well, obviously the walls within the house are drywall and stuffed full of insulation.
Why do I feel like I just fell for something?
Submitted by MickGinny (user info) at 2005-03-30 19:17:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ever since you have been scarce the vibrator posts have been pretty damn lame.
Glad to hear you are well and Emily is cuter than a bugs ear.
A block house. Is it all block?
I spent some time in Orlando, my Sis lives there. I was surprised there were not more block houses as they are great for keeping cool efficiently.
Submitted by bob (user info) at 2005-03-30 19:05:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
milf hotness alert.
Submitted by BongZilla (user info) at 2005-03-30 18:52:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
if you get a bunch of nachos stuck together, thats one nacho.
Submitted by NotApologizing (user info) at 2005-03-30 17:56:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
whoa, i've been gone too long. all ya'll is growin up havin babehs and whatnot.
By the way, i'm disappointed not to see any photos of your gramma. old slots are soft...mmmm
congrats on the kid. gotta love 'em
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2005-03-30 17:38:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Apollo, you just want me to get drunk so I can't relay to the other women and Shandy the exact size of your peener. Your crystal sham is up.
Fartsmeller, you walking equivalent of a great big warm fuzzy, why all the hate? The purpose of that hat was to cover up a bird's nest 'do, more than to make a fashion statement...errrr, mumble, as the case may be.
Submitted by FartSmeller (user info) at 2005-03-30 17:21:50 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Nice trucker hat. Ashton would be so proud.
I just threw up.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2005-03-30 17:12:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
if i get you drunk enough can I have a go of you?
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2005-03-30 16:36:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Quack is such a hottie.
I'M BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORED. Who wants to fight?
Submitted by quack (user info) at 2005-03-30 16:17:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
good to hear from you, quack quack
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2005-03-30 15:36:50 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Thanks for the offer, Dannie. I'll try and use some Vitamin E first, since I can get it locally...but if that doesn't help, I'll come crawling to you.
Submitted by Herpes (user info) at 2005-03-30 15:05:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I am glad to hear that everything is going well for you. Bad things happen to good people, but it looks like it will all work out in the end.
Submitted by Dead_0hi0_Sky (user info) at 2005-03-30 14:51:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
only for being hot.
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-03-30 14:50:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-03-30 14:45:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I wouldn't even notice it until AFTER I stared a hole in her ass.
Submitted by Dannie (user info) at 2005-03-30 14:39:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You are just a beautiful girl with a beautiful smile.
Your daughter is a doll, too.
Good for you! It is good to hear about things looking up around here!
Beauticontrol has a great product called Demarkable that is for stretch marks and scarring. It's $35.00 for a tube, but it is an AWESOME product.
If you need to find some, drop me a line:
unwindwithme at gmail.com
I don't think your scar will be the first thing people see by any means.
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2005-03-30 14:09:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Bob,
I think that's a dad thing. Whenever Emily visits her father, I get her back decidedly ungroomed and usually with dried cookie around her mouth. I, on the other hand, follow her around with baby wipes, trying to clean up messes as soon as they occur.
Tim,
Don't tell me things like that! GAH!
Spook,
Orlando is pretty bustling. I, however, am living outside Orlando and the area I picked is in a small town. It's ideal, I can drive twenty minutes and be in the center of Orlando and in the thick of everything-and at the end of the night, I can drive home to my little house on the prairie...or something. Check out Steven's Plantation whenever your move gets closer.
And Mario:
Submitted by Mario (user info) at 2005-03-30 10:55:16 (#)
Ranking: 0
Scar isn't bad either...doesn't really so much look like a scar, more like your throat is smiling.
------------------------------------------
AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW! :)
Submitted by Mario (user info) at 2005-03-30 10:55:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Scar isn't bad either...doesn't really so much look like a scar, more like your throat is smiling.
Submitted by Mario (user info) at 2005-03-30 10:53:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Good to see things are looking up.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2005-03-30 10:14:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Go ahead girl!
My name is Emily too, and I also floss too much. Small world.
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2005-03-30 10:05:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Come visit me, apollo and the gang in the UK... We'll turn those pearly whites into a thick yellow streak in no time.
Submitted by Josephine (user info) at 2005-03-30 09:58:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Adorable baby. I wish everyone was as optimistic as you are!
Submitted by TheSpook (user info) at 2005-03-30 09:49:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
How's Orlando?
I'm trying to move to Florida in September?
Is there a shitload of people there?
Submitted by congo (user info) at 2005-03-30 09:25:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-03-30 09:24:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Maybe you are but I'd still eat your box.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-03-30 09:17:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
What a beautiful girl.
The baby too! ;)
Submitted by thaumaturge (user info) at 2005-03-30 08:52:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Periodical, please.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-03-30 08:42:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO KRISSY
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2005-03-30 08:33:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Looking at picture #3 reminds of whne my boy was littler. When he would be a mess like that, I would rub my hands all over my head to try to get him to the same thing. Only difference is my face wasn't messed with baby food.
I'm a bastard sometimes.
Submitted by EbolaMay (user info) at 2005-03-30 07:53:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You's all that and a bag of chips too. You can puke dead cow in my beer any time, lady.
Submitted by MyNameIsTim (user info) at 2005-03-30 07:30:54 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
your daughter is beautiful!
finally, someone with as obsessive of a compulsion disorder as I!
I brush my teeth approximately 7 times a day...floss at least twice a day. about 3 packs of sugar free trident whitening a week.
back in the day they used to say, "brush at least three times a day, and after every meal." i added in 'before every mean' also. now they're telling me i need gum graft surgery because i brush too much. thanks for telling me that when i was 6, assholes.
i was thinking about moving down to florida. its gotta beat the hell out of jersey...
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2005-03-30 07:23:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
you're more positive than the usual depressed Uber crowd.
+2 for you
Submitted by funk_boy (user info) at 2005-03-30 05:21:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
that kid looks happy
Submitted by whiskey_jack (user info) at 2005-03-30 04:53:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Atleast you're still hot. ANd I know the pains and pleasures on raising a kid. I live with two of my cousins who are 3 and 6. And I've consequently helped take care of them since their birth. Though I can't help you with the teething thing; though I've heard of lots of people(especially Scandinavians) dipping pacifiers into some vodka or some sort of liqiour. It's not enough to hurt them just soothes the pain. I can assure you though once they get older they just become little bundles of energy. Whenever I need a god laugh I just go play with my 3 yr old cousin and giggle for a good hour.
Christ! A 18 yr old shouldn't know this crap. Hahaha, I'm gonna be flippin super dad later on.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2005-03-30 03:19:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
<ejaculates>
kristen ain't bad either.
Submitted by William_Q_Percy (user info) at 2005-03-30 03:07:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Jeez... from the loks of your last comment you have a SERIOUS oral fixation.
Hmmmm.
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2005-03-30 01:31:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Whoa, I brush them!
Three times a day.
Okay, five times a day.
And I floss a few times a day.
And use mouthwash every time I brush.
And I don't smoke.
And I chew sugar free gum.
That's all I can think of.
Submitted by jonukah (user info) at 2005-03-30 01:26:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Whoah, how did your teeth get so white?
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2005-03-30 01:22:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Pregnancy makes your boobs bigger. They just deflate afterward. :o(
I think she's cute. That first picture of her cracks me up. "DUUUUUUUH!"
Submitted by Lisa (user info) at 2005-03-30 01:08:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Awesome, Kristen. I guess I'll stop trying to get knocked up for the sole purpose of enlarging my not-so-much-funbags.
Emily is cute. For a kid.
Submitted by Val (user info) at 2005-03-30 01:08:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Damn. I'm SO GLAD everything went alright, and you and the baby are healthy and happy. Jesus christ, you had me worried for awhile.
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2005-03-30 01:05:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
That's pretty cool, The_Fan. Pretty cool indeed.
Submitted by The_Fan (user info) at 2005-03-30 00:35:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh it's not a fetish in that I (or other guys) like the scar itself, it's more that a scar gives you character. Plus it breaks up the physical perfection of some women, which can actually be a good thing.
But seriously, if you are looking for some inspiration on fighting cancer, this girl I know has not only beat it twice (or at least into remission twice), but has raised more than $40,000 for cancer research.
http://www.mypage.ilnet.ch/ppfranger/keeponswimming/mystory.html
http://www.keeponswimming.ch.vu/
Not bad for a 20 year old.
Submitted by MandaPanda (user info) at 2005-03-30 00:29:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm from Plymouth.
And I'm on AIM: Mandapanda1707. Just so we're not heating up Kristen's post even more so than it would naturally be.
That didn't make any sense, did it?
Submitted by Shay (user info) at 2005-03-30 00:27:13 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Hey MandaPanda, where are you from? South of Boston? Patriot Ledger? I am from Boston.
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2005-03-30 00:23:09 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2005-03-30 00:08:49 (#)
Ranking: 0
Once a camwhore, always a camwhore, Mike. :p Hey, if baby Tylenol and Orajel aren't easing her teething pain, what else can I LEGALLY use?
Orajel always worked for us. Hmmmmm....how about just a binky or something for her to chew on? Other than that, I don't know. Keep her occupied so she doesn't think about it.
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2005-03-30 00:21:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
WQP, we've got email issues, young man.
I didn't know there was such thing as a scar fetish, the_fan... :p
Submitted by antluvdog (user info) at 2005-03-30 00:19:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You're a MILF!
Submitted by MandaPanda (user info) at 2005-03-30 00:14:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
My little sister is named Emily. I *HATE* reading sad stories about girls named Emily.
Like this one: http://enterprise.southofboston.com/articles/2005/03/26/news/news/news01.txt
Moral of the story? Don't leave your baby with other people.
Submitted by redzone (user info) at 2005-03-30 00:14:06 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
shut the fuck up and get a life. you are boring your life is boring ans you are stupid
Submitted by William_Q_Percy (user info) at 2005-03-30 00:13:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Congratulations on every account, babe.
Submitted by The_Fan (user info) at 2005-03-30 00:11:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Cancer can be beaten Kristen. Check out this remarkable young woman's story:
http://www.keeponswimming.ch.vu/
As for the scar, I'm a rugby player and have lots of them. There's nothing more sexy to a rugby guy than a girls with a big scar. Ever scar has a story, usually an interesting one.
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2005-03-30 00:08:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Once a camwhore, always a camwhore, Mike. :p Hey, if baby Tylenol and Orajel aren't easing her teething pain, what else can I LEGALLY use?
jonukah, who says I ceased to lust after you???
And I'm somewhat flattered that I drove you to self-loathing, Stabby.
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2005-03-30 00:04:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Still a camwhore, I see. :)
Nice kid.
Submitted by Shay (user info) at 2005-03-29 23:59:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I like the hat.
Submitted by Stabkill (user info) at 2005-03-29 23:58:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
As much as I hate the term and people who use it, I must break down and say it myself.
MILF.
Submitted by jonukah (user info) at 2005-03-29 23:57:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Having a baby and getting cancer is NO excuse for ceasing to lust after me on ubersite.
How dare you.
I. Am. Very. Put. Out.
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2005-03-29 23:56:28 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
And show my roots? Perish the thought!
You know I love you, BawkBawk. When I have unlimited use of both my hands for more than five minutes at a shot, I will get on AIM-that's a promise!
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2005-03-29 23:54:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh and you know I love you to bits but you must get rid of that awful hat NOW.
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2005-03-29 23:52:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Awww!!!!!!!!!
Submitted by GodChicken (user info) at 2005-03-29 23:50:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I just wish you'd remember my phone number, damn you.
Or my AIM name.
or anything.
Submitted by Shay (user info) at 2005-03-29 23:47:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Yes! Go out and buy that Vitamin E! You'll be fine :-)
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2005-03-29 23:43:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I had my surgery in December. Is there still hope?!
,
Submitted by Shay (user info) at 2005-03-29 23:41:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
How long ago did you have the surgery? Seriously Kristen, you are a very pretty girl, that is not the first thing that people are going to notice. You are of course, because it's your body, but in time it will fade. And I think it's awesome that you can talk about it and post a picture of it. And honestly, it's not that bad.
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2005-03-29 23:38:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Shay,
I hate the scar, but I'm slowly getting used to it. I mean, my eyes still automatically fall to that spot when I look in a mirror, I touch it self-consciously all the time, and I assume everyone else is staring at it when I go in public...wait, did I say I'm getting used to it? i'll try the aloe/Vitamin E. Thanks!
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2005-03-29 23:37:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Your daughter is absolutely gorgeous.
Sorry to hear that you went through some tough times. Hoping that everything turns out well for you.
Submitted by Shay (user info) at 2005-03-29 23:30:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Thanks, that's very sweet of you. It does suck for her, she is a beautiful girl, inside and out. I am hoping that everything goes well. As of right now, she just started chemo about a month ago and is still working. She is luck to have finally met a nice 'decent' guy that doesn't just want her for her looks. It's good that you caught it as quick as you did. I know the whole aloe thing on your scar sounds so minimal, and my scar was not that big, but very swolen and puffy, enough to have my doctor's consider surgery. The gel tabs helped, ALOT! Nature does work wonders sometimes!
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2005-03-29 23:25:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Shay,
Damn, that sucks. My cancer had gone to my lymph nodes as well, but thyroid cancer is the only cancer that can spread to the lymph nodes and have it NOT be a big deal. Your friend is so, so young for such slap of reality. I'm not trying to press my relious beliefs on you, but I will keep your mother's boyfriend and your friend in my prayers. It can't hurt, it may help...who knows. *hug*
And thank you Manda, I am partial to her name as well. :oP
Submitted by Shay (user info) at 2005-03-29 23:22:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
P.S., the scar doesn't look that bad, I'm sure it will heal over time. Buy some Vitamin E gel caps, pop them open and spread the insides all over that forever, all day long and it will minimize. Trust me, I split just above my eye, on what I think was the corner of my friend's bureau, she thinks i fell on her bed, the jury's still out. My doctor told me that I might need surgery to minimize the scar. My sociology teacher told me the above stated aloe trick.
Submitted by MandaPanda (user info) at 2005-03-29 23:21:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Gorgeous baby, awesome baby name.
I floss too much, too. I nearly had an emotional breakdown when I ran out the other night.
Best of luck to you with the whole cancer thing.
Submitted by Shay (user info) at 2005-03-29 23:19:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Your daughter is adorable! What happened to that baby you had custody of? I remember you asking Loki for tax advice? Also, I'm glad to hear everything went well with the cancer thing. I just found out that my mother's boyfriend has bone cancer. Two weeks later I found out that my friend, 29 has breast cancer. She's known about a lump in her breast for a year but was too scared to go to a doctor. Her best friend finally told her mother and she went. She found out that she has breast cancer and has to undergo chemo. She will lose her hair, but worse than that, the cancer has spread throughout her lymphnodes. Count your blessings, as I'm sure you do.