On Pseudopoetry (655 hits)
Category: GeneralRating: 1.19 on 16 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Sarah Prejean <derivablezero.at.gmail.com> (View user info) at 2005-04-10 15:14:30 EDT
The other day, I had one of the most invigorating (though altogether irreconcilable) arguments in the Honors Lounge at my University. For starters, let me tell you what the Honors Lounge is. The Honors Lounge is a building in which I am not really a frequent, but I know all of the frequents. Or most of them. It is a building designed to house and accommodate students in the Honors program here at the University of Louisiana at Lafayette. We are supposed to go there in order to expand our minds with each other, make friends, and potentially create "honors babies" for our matriarch, Dr. Patricia Rickels. (The woman is older than dirt. God bless her.) In reality, we go there to shoot the shit, skip class, drink coffee, and catch up with friends. Today, I spent a good bit of time there after my 1:00 p.m. American Literature class.
In my class, there is an individual who shall remain unnamed (simply for the fact that I do not want to get sued for calling him an ignorant pseudopoet). This individual firmly believes that poetry is "one's soul poured out on paper" which I believe is ALMOST (but not quite all the way) complete bullshit. This individual claims that his poetry "makes people think for about 10 to 15 minutes after they have finished reading". He proudly states that "some of my poems are complete questions with lines broken up". I am thinking "Like decoration on an ugly Christmas tree?"
Perhaps I should explain why I think that this person's belief is completely ignorant. I have been a member of <a href="http://deviantart.com">DeviantART</a> for a while. Whenever I first joined, I only posted some poetry that I had written about things going on in my life. Most of it was kind of angsty, but I met a guy who told me that I had great potential. (Whether it was hot air or not, I don't know.) So, he helped to coax me out of writing angsty poetry, and eventually we got so comfortable with each other that if I wrote something crappy he would scald me with an icy tongue of criticism. I loved every minute of it. For this reason, I have developed skill in avoiding cliche, learned how to use meter effectively, learned how to give and accept criticism, and began to see poetry as a craft and not merely a hobby.
So, whenever someone shows me something that does not make me ask any questions which have not been previously asked (i/e: unoriginal pseudothought)my first reaction is to throw up the contents of my stomach into the back of my mouth and them swallow them down again. I wish I were kidding. The aforementioned individual writes the sort of poetry that causes me to commit such a heinous act of self-violence. (I mean, have you ever swallowed your own vomit? It's disgusting.) However, I am a really nice person (only in person, on DeviantART I have been known to be quite the tongue-lasher whenever it comes to people who claim to "rite poetry u cant undrstnd mang lol!!1212")whenever it comes to criticism of strangers. So, I mention a couple of things I don't like, and tell him to keep going. Just for the sake of niceties.
HOWEVER...
The individual (read: now an asshole) believes that any poetry which is NOT "pouring the author's soul out onto the page for others to see, or making them ask questions of themselves for 15 minutes after they read it" (The only question I would ask for 15 minutes after I read it is "WHERE THE FUCK WAS THE BIRTH CONTROL IN THE RELATIONSHIP?!") is, in fact, not art at all.
Anyone who knows me, knows that I am not a huge gigantic mega fan of Charles Bukowski. But I respect the man. Mainly for the poem <a href="http://plagiarist.com/poetry/190/">The History of One Tough Motherfucker</a> in which Bukowski shows us what it is like to succeed amidst a cruel world... simply by talking about his cat... and then slaps us in the face with the reality that sometimes it is impossible... but the fight makes it worth it. (This is my own interpretation.) I mentioned this, and the individual (read: fucking fucktard supremo grande) says "that's not art." So, I countered with the age old argument: "Art is subjective." And he counters with the age old EMO statement: "Art is about the soul of the artist. That is why poetry is the most sacred form of art." My only question left (because I was really having trouble swallowing back my vomit at this point) was "So you don't think that if someone can make up a scenario, create a metaphor, sock you in the face with imagery, and TELL you something about life instead of asking rhetorical questions filtered through a sieve of cliches... that it is art? You don't consider that art?"
He looks dead at me, and says "No."
For the first time in my life, I wonder if premeditated murder will get me into Hell if I am really justified.
Fin.
User Reviews
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2005-05-24 19:04:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
yeah, I still think so
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2005-04-11 17:40:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
poetry sucks dick
pretentious losers abound
where is my silence
Submitted by Flying_buttmonkey (user info) at 2005-04-11 07:39:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Set him on fire. Call it art.
I hope these are going to lighten up a bit, your posts are good but a bit dry.
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2005-04-11 07:12:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
People who finish things with "Fin" really don't need to exist.
Watch the Family Guy with "The King and I" that incorporates the short film "Lint".
"Lint" ends with 'Fin'. Enough said.
Oh, and you write poetry.
Submitted by ATILLAtheGREAT (user info) at 2005-04-11 06:49:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
fuckin hate poetry and all of its story tellin bullshit.
Submitted by Kre8rix (user info) at 2005-04-11 06:31:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You are my favorite new user by far.
Thank you for that.
Submitted by DanielH (user info) at 2005-04-11 05:51:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by MrWillard (user info) at 2005-04-10 19:13:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Law school is perfectly acceptable. Good stuff.
Submitted by MrWillard (user info) at 2005-04-10 19:08:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Good writing...thats what the rating is for.
You seem to think you're better than others because your feelings and beliefs differ. Please disconfirm this for me, because thats the impression I'm getting from your writings and your reviews.
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-04-10 18:36:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
muy bien!
Submitted by mikethescottish (user info) at 2005-04-10 18:15:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Good post- I feel exactly the same about poetry, though I tihnk self-examination can have it's place. Ever read any of Philip Larkin's stuff?
Submitted by Zoidberg (user info) at 2005-04-10 17:09:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That guy is a tool.
Poetry referential to the author is a 20th century convention. It wasn't always about the pain and suffering of the tortured artist.
Submitted by Bickerstaff (user info) at 2005-04-10 15:50:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
After the bleeding part, you know what I mean, the part after his
stitches have healed from the spot where you knocked his goth ass out,
after that part; then you tell him:
art is a symbiotic relationship between content, artist, and interpreter.
Thomas Aquinas said that "pulcra sunt que visa placent" and while he's talking
about beauty more than art, I think the use of the word "visa" is paramount.
The apprehension of art is equal to how its conveyed, right?
Or not, whatever. Fuck. Just smack him in the mouth.
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2005-04-10 15:47:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I like you.
Submitted by G-prime (user info) at 2005-04-10 15:22:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/2265
Submitted by DerivableZero (user info) at 2005-04-10 15:17:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Stupid html didn't work.
http://deviantart.com
and
http://plagiarist.com/poetry/190/