Random thoughts, beer and a sunburn (632 hits)
Category: GeneralRating: 1.44 on 14 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by yermom (View user info) at 2005-04-11 14:05:52 EDT
It's funny the way things work out. It always amazes me that whenever I'm feeling really down or confused, life always seems to throw me a wicked curveball that I just wasn't expecting. It never fails to surprise me just how much the world is a complete mystery to me. Whenever I think that I've had just the most kick ass week, and I couldn't be happier, I wake up next to a beautiful girl who smiles at me, and somehow, the rest of the week pales in comparison.
Maybe I'm just happy because I've finally been able to shake the winter blues. The weather has been absolutely beautiful for the past couple of days. Nothing says spring like a bunch of half naked girls running around, but I digress. Beer is my official drink of the warm weather months, and well, it's also my official drink of the rest of the months too, but whatever, beer is awesome.
Speaking of beer, my roommate and I were thinking about buying a canoe, we figured that it had a 800lb capacity, so we could probably take about 3 people and about 200 lbs of beer. Can you get a DUI in a canoe? If so how do they catch you, are there park rangers paddling around in canoes, with some kind of new fangled, canoe light bar? Maybe they just walk down the bank of the river until you stop, but if they did that, what if you drank all the beer, and sank all the empties, then they could probably only get you on littering.
Sometimes I wish I was a lawyer, because it's hard to scheme up good ideas, when they might still get you put away for a long time. Have you ever seen the show Cheaters? Private investigators catch people cheating on their significant others, it's pretty cool, because I despise cheaters more than anyone on the planet. Anyway, I was thinking that you could always offer the people that were cheated on, the opportunity to sell you any naked pictures of the cheatees and then sell them to porn sites on the internet. All interests are served, the cheater gets screwed for screwing around, the cheatee knows the truth, and gets revenge, and the PI gets paid twice, it's a fool proof plan.
I told my mom I got married this weekend, I put a band on my ring finger, and went over just to say hello, when she noticed the ring, she flipped out, not necessarily in a bad way, but still it's pretty funny. I should really remember that mom has heart problems; I'm not allowed to play jokes on her any time in the near future, at least that's what the doctor in the ER said. Oh well, it's been an awesome weekend, and my ranting is finished. If the weather is nice, do yourselves a favor; spend the evening outside drinking ice cold beer outside in the warm sun. Also, I highly recommend waking up next to someone you really love, especially if they've been away for a while, it'll put a perspective on things.
Now for your enjoyment, picture of my bad ass truckers tan.
User Reviews
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-04-12 10:20:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Not bad...not great.
Submitted by Flying_buttmonkey (user info) at 2005-04-12 07:28:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I'm extremely fair skinned - red hair, freckles. Mum's irish, damn genes - and I thought it'd be a really fucking good idea to fall asleep in the mid-August sun slathered in baby oil. My friend did it, but it didn't really occur to me that she was darker skinned than me.
Anyway, I have a scar on my shoulder from the burns even now.
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-04-11 19:56:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Lisa (user info) at 2005-04-11 15:10:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
This morning I woke up craving scrambled eggs and bananas. I wonder how that would taste.
Submitted by yermom (user info) at 2005-04-11 14:46:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
crap didn't mean to +2 myself
Submitted by yermom (user info) at 2005-04-11 14:46:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I've just gotten used to getting burned at least once a year, when I was maybe 12, I went to a water park, stayed in the water all day, had huge blisters on my back for weeks, when my skin finally peeled, it looked like I shed my whole back and grew a new one.
Submitted by canadia (user info) at 2005-04-11 14:41:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I love beer! I love summer! I love the sun!
What sucks is waking up green and sticky all over because you got a bad sunburn and you tried to make it better by putting aloe vera gel all over before you went to bed.
Submitted by BedOfHog (user info) at 2005-04-11 14:37:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
My friend went to Steinmetz, which was the school in Cheaters. He didn't know the kids, but he was around for all that stuff.
Submitted by MyNameIsTim (user info) at 2005-04-11 14:31:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
evenly?
if by evenly you mean NOT evenly.
Submitted by yermom (user info) at 2005-04-11 14:28:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Damn Tim that sucks, but at least yours is evenly burned.
Submitted by MyNameIsTim (user info) at 2005-04-11 14:24:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i gotta say, my thoughts/life are surprisingly similar these days
and my sunburn puts yours to shame. check this sunburn out: http://www.ubersite.com/m/64021
Submitted by mbstateside (user info) at 2005-04-11 14:21:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Summer months where made for lounging in the sun drinking Beer.
Submitted by yermom (user info) at 2005-04-11 14:20:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Any time. It's either write stuff for you people to read, or plan the revolution.
Vive la rivoluzione!
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2005-04-11 14:13:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Great afternooon read.
Thanks.