People Who Shop at Hot Topic Should be Smited (1184 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -0.27 on 44 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Confuzitron (View user info) at 2005-04-14 17:14:06 EDT
I was given the responsibility of watching over my niece for a night, while her parents hit one of St. Louis' fine riverboat casinos. A little background: My niece is a spoiled brat. She has parents who are part of the upper-middle class, so she gets what she wants when she wants. And despite living such a privileged life, she feels all the angst that comes with being an outcast teenager. So, of course, she begs me to take her to the mall. Because, as we all know, no anti-establishment/anti-conformist teenager can express their rebellious spirit better than hanging out at a capitalism hotbed like the mall. The only reason I take her is because I don't want to have to put up with her crap all night. As we cruised through the mall, I got really pissed off because I had just remembered that this mall has a Hot Topic, and this devil child would definitely want to make a stop in there. She wears nothing but black, even at family events. So when the inevitable stop comes, I tell myself "There's no way I'm stepping foot in that God forsaken store." However, that just wasn't my day. As I'm waiting outside, the girl comes out and says "They have this HILARIOUS shirt, but I'm about $6 short. Could you come in (gasp!) and help buy it for me?" I didn't have any cash on me, and all I had with me was my Debit Card. Since I doubt they'd let a 13-14 year old girl use a debit card, and since there was no way in hell I was giving anyone my PIN number, I committed one of the 7 deadly sins and stepped inside a Hot Topic. Why? Because it's still not as bad as her bitching at me until midnight. The shirt she wanted me to buy had a bunny saying something like "You suck, and that is sad." My head started pounding. I thought she said that shirt was "hilarious." I did not put my mental well being on the line by going into a Hot Topic to buy that stupid shirt. It was fucking stupid, and I said that to her, in those exact words. I had enough. I stopped caring about her bitching. She was treading a thin line as it was, and making me go into a Hot Topic to buy a retarded shirt was the final straw. As I left the store, teenager throwing a hissy fit behind me, these two teenage boys left me with a quote, the stupidity of which I simply cannot comprehend. It went as follows:
1st Guy: Awesome. A Green Day 'American Idiot' shirt. Wait, Jim, don't you already have this shirt?
2nd Guy: Yeah.
1st Guy, again: Damn! I don't want it anymore. I wanted to be original.
AAGH! NOO!!!! DIE, STUPID PEOPLE, DIE!!!
User Reviews
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2006-01-11 18:31:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by minimumdino (user info) at 2006-01-11 17:26:41 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Everything you ever wanted to know about Confuzitron
User id: 18057
Registered on or around: 2005-04-12 12:45:21
# Messages posted: 6
# Reviews written: 1202
# Times these posts have been reviewed : 147
# Hits: 2947
Average rating of all messages: 0.99
Submitted by minimumdino (user info) at 2006-01-11 17:24:45 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
oh my goodness i dont feel as if i am man enough unless i post back on every one!
Submitted by HighVoltage900 (user info) at 2006-01-11 16:52:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
HO HO HO!!! SANTA VOLTAGE IS HERE TO GIVE YOU A +2 TREAT!
Submitted by minimumdino (user info) at 2006-01-11 15:21:14 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
you should try it some time its quite refreshing
Submitted by minimumdino (user info) at 2006-01-10 19:45:09 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
someone's jealous
Submitted by kissmyarse (user info) at 2005-10-27 16:03:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
get an identity
Submitted by kissmyarse (user info) at 2005-10-27 16:03:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2005-06-09 13:44:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I'll be anticonformist enough to say this was worth it.
But don't be calling me a capitalist tool.
Submitted by DCWoody (user info) at 2005-06-09 13:43:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
smiten...its smiten
Submitted by Sassmasterr (user info) at 2005-06-09 13:24:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
is your name a Space Ghost reference?
Submitted by Sassmasterr (user info) at 2005-06-09 13:24:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for that asshat fucking up the word "grammer"
Submitted by Socialist_Joe (user info) at 2005-05-01 15:14:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
this post makes me wish i still had some colt
Submitted by B-Nizzo (user info) at 2005-05-01 15:04:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
True, but use some fucking paragraphs!
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2005-04-15 09:10:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Stop your impotent bitching and go make me a sandwich. Turkey and swiss, no mayo please thanks.
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2005-04-15 08:57:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Because this post sukked
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2005-04-15 08:55:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by MoonStone (user info) at 2005-04-14 23:05:15 (#)
Ranking: -2
-2 for grammer/no paragraphs/ect
-2 for hateing "happy bunny"
+2 for hateing lame ass wanabe teanagers
...still a -2
----------------
Grammar.
Etc.
Hating.
Hating.
Wannabe.
You're special.
Submitted by myredmirage95 (user info) at 2005-04-15 03:14:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I stayed up until 3am to read THIS? You sicken me.
...and shut up about your stupid cousin, neice or illegitimate love child..whatever she was. Cut the girl some slack, she's a TEENAGER. I'm sure you were never one of those and I'm sure you were never amused my something stupid.
You ass.
Submitted by Spuds002 (user info) at 2005-04-15 02:54:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
When I go to sleep, tiny llamas speak to me in Yiddish, and we fantasize together and brainstorm about how to take out small businesses by using an anti-awesome vacuum SO powerful, and SO FDA not approved, that we simultaneously wipe out the US ecosystem and Wall Street pimps in exactly 25 minutes. After that, we drink Jaegermeister right out of the bathtub, and fondle each other naughtily with spoons and French dressing.
This review saved you. This was the hottest thing I have ever heard. My balls just emptied in my undies thinking about it.
Submitted by FartSmeller (user info) at 2005-04-15 02:47:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Everything you ever wanted to know about MoonStone
User id: 12200
Registered on or around: 2004-09-15 16:52:17
# Messages posted: 0
# Reviews written: 246
# Times these posts have been reviewed : 0
# Hits: 0
Average rating of all messages: 0.00
Submitted by ze_poodle (user info) at 2005-04-15 02:37:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Burn Hot Topic! Burn it! Burn it all!
Burn! Burn! Burn!
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2005-04-14 23:18:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
People Who Complain About People Who Shop at Hot Topic Should be Smited. The actual shopers, not this post.
Submitted by MoonStone (user info) at 2005-04-14 23:05:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
-2 for grammer/no paragraphs/ect
-2 for hateing "happy bunny"
+2 for hateing lame ass wanabe teanagers
...still a -2
Submitted by stevetherugbyman (user info) at 2005-04-14 22:49:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Good post. I've had no respect for hot topic since it was bought out by the Gap. Now I refer to it as "Gap Topic" (original eh?). No +2 since there were grammar/paragraph problems.
Submitted by Val (user info) at 2005-04-14 21:05:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
When I go to sleep, tiny llamas speak to me in Yiddish, and we fantasize together and brainstorm about how to take out small businesses by using an anti-awesome vacuum SO powerful, and SO FDA not approved, that we simultaneously wipe out the US ecosystem and Wall Street pimps in exactly 25 minutes. After that, we drink Jaegermeister right out of the bathtub, and fondle each other naughtily with spoons and French dressing.
This post hurt that tiny space behind my eyes.
Submitted by pastacheese (user info) at 2005-04-14 20:55:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I was gonna give it a -1 do to the lack of paragraphs, but the topic was funny enough that I had to give it a +2.
Submitted by ruthless (user info) at 2005-04-14 19:42:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Oh who gives a shit where people shop, or why they shop there.
Submitted by Kale (user info) at 2005-04-14 19:24:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Feijuada (user info) at 2005-04-14 19:10:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I hate fucking bricks of text; they make me feel like I have been hit with a real one. SHUT THE FUCK UP.
Submitted by Jo_of_the_golden_P (user info) at 2005-04-14 18:58:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
I've been using debit cards since I was nine. Also, this has been done to death.
Submitted by Confuzitron (user info) at 2005-04-14 18:52:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
OMG DUDE!!! LEIK, HOT TOPIC HAS EVERYTING!!! THEY TRULY UNDERSTAND ME AND MY PLIGHT!1!! HOW COULD YOU SAY SOMETHIN LIKE TAHT BOUT THEM?/??
Submitted by Confuzitron (user info) at 2005-04-14 18:06:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I blame Al Quaeda
Submitted by mikethescottish (user info) at 2005-04-14 18:01:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I blame asylum seekers
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2005-04-14 17:49:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i blame the media
Submitted by Auf-Der-Maur (user info) at 2005-04-14 17:48:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You, sir, raise a valid point
Submitted by mxc_jwebber (user info) at 2005-04-14 17:45:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hot Topic is for whiny emo pussies... I say we plant a bomb underneath one and announce 20% off those faggoty bracelets they wear, then when we get them in there, KABOOM! But that's just me...
Submitted by sixxforty (user info) at 2005-04-14 17:43:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
+1 for drawing the line with the bitch
Submitted by subliminalshock (user info) at 2005-04-14 17:34:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
well if you work on gramer and spelling it could be good, i agree that the hot topic shopers should die.
Submitted by canadia (user info) at 2005-04-14 17:33:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
sorry dude...
Submitted by Girlwithaclue (user info) at 2005-04-14 17:29:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Paragraphs, paragraphs, paragraphs....
Enough said.
Welcome
Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2005-04-14 17:29:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Holy shit! an 18000 user!
have a -2 for that. i figure i can start treating noobs with haughty disdain now.
Submitted by Confuzitron (user info) at 2005-04-14 17:24:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
-2 Fuckin Noob! Go take an english class, you dumbass!
Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2005-04-14 17:20:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"People who shop at Hot Topic should be smitten"
That doesn't seem right. With what? Mild affection?
Submitted by DonovanMD (user info) at 2005-04-14 17:19:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
People who dont use paragraphs should be killed.
Its smiten not smited.