Giant Snooze Buttons of Dreams (1241 hits)
Category: HumorLabels: ETS_Comedy_Photoshops
Rating: 1.76 on 45 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (View user info) at 2005-04-26 14:53:20 EDT
User Reviews
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2005-09-02 01:31:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
recalc
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2005-08-28 18:38:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
hmmmmm
Submitted by JHoersten2 (user info) at 2005-08-28 17:56:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
gay
Submitted by DyingBreed (user info) at 2005-04-28 16:42:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
equalized
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2005-04-26 21:55:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Rad: I'm not sure as to the accuracy of that recipe. It was gotten from the Anarchist Cookbook by Jolly Roger. Here is a site that seems to know what it's talking about though: http://www.hallucinogens.com/lsd/
Looks pretty authoritative and thorough. It would be interesting to see what the recipe I posted here created. If anyone tries it, let me know.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-04-26 21:41:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Here's something we should all try...
How to Make LSD:
1) Grind up 150 grams of Morning Glory seeds or baby Hawaiian wood rose seeds.
2) In 130 cc. of petroleum ether, soak the seeds for two days.
3) Filter the solution through a tight screen.
4) Throw away the liquid, and allow the seed mush to dry.
5) For two days allow the mush to soak in 110 cc. of wood alcohol.
6) Filter the solution again, saving the liquid and labeling it "1."
7) Resoak the mush in 110 cc. of wood alcohol for two days.
8) Filter and throw away the mush.
9) Add the liquid from the second soak to the solution labeled "1."
10) Pour the liquid into a cookie tray and allow it to evaporate.
11) When all of the liquid has evaporated, a yellow gum remains. This should be scraped up and put into capsules.
30 grams of Morning Glory seeds = 1 trip
15 Hawaiian wood rose seeds = 1 trip
===================================================
Where does Lysergic Acid fit in here?
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2005-04-26 21:38:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Let me guess... How to is brought to you by professorfuckface/squattail, and he's pissed that I told people 'how to' make LSD?
Awwwwww, I'm sorry to steal your niche. Don't worry, you still have jacking off with feces all to yourself.
Submitted by howto (user info) at 2005-04-26 21:28:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by MoneyG (user info) at 2005-04-26 20:45:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Work thoughts....
provacative
Submitted by The_Fan (user info) at 2005-04-26 20:12:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I remember my dreams by the semen in my pajamas.
Submitted by InkyFingers (user info) at 2005-04-26 20:08:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Thanks.
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2005-04-26 19:50:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Here's something we should all try...
How to Make LSD:
1) Grind up 150 grams of Morning Glory seeds or baby Hawaiian wood rose seeds.
2) In 130 cc. of petroleum ether, soak the seeds for two days.
3) Filter the solution through a tight screen.
4) Throw away the liquid, and allow the seed mush to dry.
5) For two days allow the mush to soak in 110 cc. of wood alcohol.
6) Filter the solution again, saving the liquid and labeling it "1."
7) Resoak the mush in 110 cc. of wood alcohol for two days.
8) Filter and throw away the mush.
9) Add the liquid from the second soak to the solution labeled "1."
10) Pour the liquid into a cookie tray and allow it to evaporate.
11) When all of the liquid has evaporated, a yellow gum remains. This should be scraped up and put into capsules.
30 grams of Morning Glory seeds = 1 trip
15 Hawaiian wood rose seeds = 1 trip
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2005-04-26 19:30:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh, wait! I take that back. There is another book I could recommend, that might have subconsciously had something to do with this called 'An Underground Education'. It's got all the seedy interesting historical facts that a typical American education will not encompass.
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0385483767/104-4343999-0341542?v=glance
Also, check out the show 'Connections' on TLC if it ever comes on anymore. It's a great source of interesting random historical and scientific fact.
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2005-04-26 19:26:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I know this is going to sound pretty stupid, but no specific books I can think of contributed to this. Most of it is just random knowledge I've obtained from various reading, THe Discovery Channel, and personal observation. If you like the subject of dreams and their origins, you'd most likely be a fan of this series of Time-Life books called 'Mysteries of the Unknown'. I know that sounds cheesy, but there is some fucking awesome stuff in there. You should check it out! You might be able to find someone selling the whole series on ebay or something. The books about Psychic Phenomena and ESP are especially good if I remember correctly.
http://www.volumelists.com/detail.php?ser=Mysteries%20of%20the%20Unknown
Submitted by InkyFingers (user info) at 2005-04-26 19:05:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
two plus 2 to help even out my stupidity.
Submitted by InkyFingers (user info) at 2005-04-26 19:05:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by InkyFingers (user info) at 2005-04-26 19:05:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2005-04-26 18:36:32 (#)
Ranking: 0
Everything in your dreams is a synthesis of the internal mindscape and external or bodily stimuli. Our minds incorporate all this information to form our dreams. It's like an abstract artist who is blindfolded, slinging paint (archetypal images, external stimuli, survival instincts, our deepest thoughts) at a moving canvas (the storyline of our dream) - the way our thoughts and emotions are formed have a great deal to do with our dreams.
Studies on lab rats have suggested there is a correlation between our minds in a dreams state, and our minds in survival mode. By measuring the brain waves of the rats during REM sleep, and also during the act of foraging for food, scientists noticed that the brain produced the same alpha waves during both activities. Their theory is that our dreams are actually a training mode to help us deal with potential problems in waking life.
This is why when you get a new job, or you are learning something new, or there is something stressful happening in your life, it will often be reflected in your dreams. It's an essential stage of our mind's natural problem-solving process.
---------------------------------
Plus Fucking two for that alone... would you mind recommending the book(s) that contributed to this idea. (Please post on one of my posts as I may not remember to check back.)
Submitted by MoonStone (user info) at 2005-04-26 18:43:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2005-04-26 18:36:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Everything in your dreams is a synthesis of the internal mindscape and external or bodily stimuli. Our minds incorporate all this information to form our dreams. It's like an abstract artist who is blindfolded, slinging paint (archetypal images, external stimuli, survival instincts, our deepest thoughts) at a moving canvas (the storyline of our dream) - the way our thoughts and emotions are formed have a great deal to do with our dreams.
Studies on lab rats have suggested there is a correlation between our minds in a dreams state, and our minds in survival mode. By measuring the brain waves of the rats during REM sleep, and also during the act of foraging for food, scientists noticed that the brain produced the same alpha waves during both activities. Their theory is that our dreams are actually a training mode to help us deal with potential problems in waking life.
This is why when you get a new job, or you are learning something new, or there is something stressful happening in your life, it will often be reflected in your dreams. It's an essential stage of our mind's natural problem-solving process.
Submitted by Professional_Peon (user info) at 2005-04-26 18:22:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I worship my snooze button.
Submitted by vettesrule88 (user info) at 2005-04-26 18:09:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
yes, that whole remembering dreams thing sucks-- i once had a dream that i went to school, asked out the girl i liked, she kissed me, and for some odd reason i got a raging boner, she jumped back in disgust and told the whoile school, i went home and went to sleep, then in real life i woke up, thinking it was a day later than it was and that i had really done what happened before... it was weird when i realized the date, and that the girl didnt hate me.
on that topic, how is it that sometimes in your dreams, your alarm will play some role, as if your mind knew it was going to happen. for instance, youre in a room, a fire starts, and your alarm directly coincides with the fire alarm?
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2005-04-26 17:23:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2005-04-26 17:04:41 (#)
Ranking: 2
Well, now that you mention it, the shampoo was green.
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Green shampoo??? Did it taste minty?
Submitted by Girlwithaclue (user info) at 2005-04-26 17:23:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for random thoughts....
I thought the part about the snooze button was interesting.
I will have to try that sometime..
Submitted by Chillax (user info) at 2005-04-26 17:16:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Didn't appeal to me at all - although a lot of effort obviously went in, and I'm really pissed off at the moment, so you avoid a neg.
Submitted by Avals (user info) at 2005-04-26 17:09:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This post was like a hit of clean, white powdery AWESOME snorted straight into my nose. B@W, motherfucker!
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2005-04-26 17:04:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Well, now that you mention it, the shampoo was green.
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2005-04-26 16:46:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Loki: you left out the part where you and the Asian got squirted on by a line of 50 masterbating aliens.
...oh wait, that was MY dream.
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2005-04-26 16:35:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Is it good or bad to remember your dreams?
Last night I dreamed that I was trying to catch a flight to some sort of conference. I couldn't find a single suitcase so I dumped everything out of my karate bag and started throwing random shit in it like shampoo even though I was supposed to only fly straight there and back in one day.
Then my mom and sister were getting in my way trying to tell me that I should just carry everything I was taking on the plane with me instead of checking it. I told them that it was a stupid idea because shampoo was on the list of items that would be confiscated from carry on luggage.
Then somehow I was suddenly in my Jeep heading to the airport but there were all these people in the way dressed in Halloween costumes, yea at 7 in the morning. (shrug) I'm dodging kids trick-or-treating and teenagers rolling houses trying to get to the airport when my cell phone rang and it was this woman I have to deal with all the time who works in our Houston office.
I like her, she seems nice but she is ah how to say this very Asian and I can't understand a damn thing she says to me on the phone so I try to deal with her via e-mail. She is notorious for finding "small problem" that are either not problems or things that I have already figured out and fixed but it takes me a couple of hours to figure out that what she is talking about is something I've already done.
So anyway, she calls me and starts in with that Asian accent and saying, "you already miss plane, time on ticket wrong, you already miss plane."
Then I get to the airport and the escalator is long as hell like the one in Moscow and not moving so I'm trying to dodge people and run down the thing.
Then I woke up all pissed off at the entire planet and everything in it. I stayed pissed off for about 10 minutes before I realized that I'm not going to any conferences and that it was all a dream.
I only wish I were kidding about this whole thing.
Look what you dredged up just LOOK.
and I'm all pissed off again for no discernable reason.
(this is what happens when I decide to stop smoking weed during the work week)
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2005-04-26 16:33:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Another kind of early 'alarm clock' was a candle with either nails or coins embedded in its sides. When the wax melted away, the coins or nails would drop into a pan, making the alerting noise.
Submitted by Adjomak (user info) at 2005-04-26 16:29:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
B@W
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2005-04-26 16:19:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Quoted from http://www.charlotte.com/mld/charlotte/news/6573065.htm -
"Snooze alarms can do more than just make you late for work. They can train you to remember your dreams. See, early morning is heavy rapid-eye-movement time, when we dream heavily. The snooze alarm can be your guide in and out of that dreamscape, as you might have noticed on a morning when you hit the snooze button several times.
Charles McPhee, the nationally syndicated columnist and radio host known as "The Dream Doctor," says if you can't remember your dreams you can try this exercise.
On a morning when you can sleep in, set your alarm and when it sounds, hit the snooze alarm. Lie still and work back in your mind to what you were just dreaming about. Remember your emotions and whatever snippets of the dream you can. See if you can piece together the outline of a dream, and write it in a notebook by your bed. Then go back to sleep and repeat the process each time the snooze alarm buzzes.
This can train your mind to better remember your dreams, McPhee says."
Submitted by PissedOffRightWingerWithAGun (user info) at 2005-04-26 16:06:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
While thinking about if they have a dog remember bob's German Shepard Theory of Self-Protection
http://www.ubersite.com/m/56894
Submitted by UberGirl (user info) at 2005-04-26 15:59:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
how does a snooze button make you remember your dreams?
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-04-26 15:51:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by CJRipley (user info) at 2005-04-26 15:33:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2005-04-26 15:33:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Bob, speaking of aluminum fluoride... I don't think I ever want to drink tap water again. http://www.actionpa.org/fluoride/aluminum.html
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2005-04-26 15:23:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
More interesting fluoride facts: http://www.holisticmed.com/fluoride/
Submitted by sixxforty (user info) at 2005-04-26 15:18:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
now i can say i learned something today.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2005-04-26 15:18:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This is just a big bowl of right.
I laughed, I cried..it moved me, Bob.
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2005-04-26 15:15:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2005-04-26 15:12:14 (#)
Ranking: 2
don't you have lower dental costs because of flouridated water? I blieve the only place your water isn't flouridated in the states is well water.
===========================
Actually all flouridated water is being slowly replaced by other means. Flouride is toxic in high levels and is especailly dangerous to children. It's much chaeper that chloronating water, and eseentially does the same thing, it's just 20 times cheaper.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2005-04-26 15:14:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Yeah, I agree with Sphag.
B@W
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2005-04-26 15:12:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
don't you have lower dental costs because of flouridated water? I blieve the only place your water isn't flouridated in the states is well water.
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2005-04-26 15:10:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Isn't flouride a by-product of processing aluminum?
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2005-04-26 15:04:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
OMFG YOU PLAGERIZER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
YOU STOLE MY POSTING STYLE!!!!!!!!!!
-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2
-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2
-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2
-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-2-
You have the underwear thing backwards, boxers let your nuts breath easier.
DOWN WITH THE TIGHTY WHITEYS!
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2005-04-26 15:01:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This certainly wouldn't be out of place on B@W.
Pure awesome!