Fight, Live or Die (836 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -0.23 on 39 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by sword (View user info) at 2005-04-26 20:18:24 EDT
"Shut the fuck up you queer cum drunk fairy. If I so much as hear you talk again I guarantee you'll die screaming."
Welcome to high school and welcome to my life. The speaker you just heard was your's truly, the date? Well I am exactly one month from my black belt test where my body would be legally registered as a lethal weapon and more importantly one week from dropping out of my karate school where I work as an instructor for younger students. I have spent hours every night for 6 nights a week training for the past several years, I have been training myself to hurt other people and the result is that I have become exceptionally violent and aggressive in all aspects of life. But more then this I have become confident in myself and I like the feeling.
I am on the school bus sitting on the second to last row where I have sat every day that I have ridden this bus. I sit here as a memorial to a friend of mine, Bill Durgin who taught me how to fight with knives and who one day stopped coming to school and stopped answering his phone. In his place sits a new kid whose name I don't remember but he is important because he is a shoplifter, he steals things and sells them on the bus at great discounts. From him I will later buy a video game "Splinter Cell", a flash light and 10 packs of batteries and on the day that he decided to run away from his parents I will give him the final 20 bucks he needs to purchase a plane ticket in exchange for a copy of "Dungeon Siege" another game. The day after that I will see his girlfriend crying in the cafeteria, but I won't speak to her because I will be too busy but I presume she was upset because her boyfriend had run away on the wings of air planes, but whatever the case and wherever that guy is I hope he is doing ok. Granted he was little more then a common criminal, but he was someone I knew and spoke with and in my opinion he shouldn't have to pay for his crimes.
I am talking to the kids who sit in the row immediately behind me, the last row of the bus. These are the kids who smoke marijuana on the school bus and who brag of more dangerous drug abuse. These are the cool kids who are unused to being stood up to or intimidated. I though am not trying to do either; I am bored and merely trying to pick a fight. The two kids behind me are making fun of the girl in front of me, she is a younger girl probably a freshman and she is the only other person to sit in the back half of the bus. She comes back here to flirt with the shoplifter who is throughly uninterested; he has a girlfriend who is better looking, many problems at home, and a business to run on the bus. The kids behind me call her a slut and whore loud enough for everyone on the bus to over hear she is embarassed but can't do anything about it. I pretend that it is intolerable, that I am some kind of vigilante out to protect the honor of this young girl but nothing could be farther from the truth. The truth is that in other circumstances or on other days I would be the one making fun of her, when I grow bored I become offensive, today it is toward the guys behind me but tomorrow it could just as easily be the girl in front of me.
The boys behind me are unimpressed with my cursing and one of them gets to his feet. I rise to meet him and our bus driver who is quite familiar with this process puts on the brakes.
"The fuck did you just say to me?"
The word "What" was cleverly omitted, I think it sounds angrier this way. I grin for a moment and then hit him hard in the stomach with my balled fist. The next few seconds are chaos, his friend attacks me from behind and the three of us collapse onto a bus seat. I am hit several times but totally unaffected by it, I even enjoy the struggle. I lash out with my own fists as often as possible and soon my hands find themselves wrapped around the neck of one of the two boys. I choke him with all my strength as his friend tries to pull me off and no one tries to stop the friend. The next thing I know our bus driver who is a portly wad of a man with unusual strength has pulled me up and away. He curses and yells vehemently at me and says I am never to ride this bus again and tells me to walk home, which I do relishing the fight the entire way of the hour long walk.
The following day I will ride the bus to school despite my banishment and I will continue to do so even though others will not. Soon I will make my final transaction from the shoplifter and he will run away from home to never be seen again. The kids on the back of the bus will find other ways to get to school and the girl will move back up to the front of the bus to sit amongst her peers and friends where I imagine she was comfortable. I myself though remained the sole denizen of the darkest depths of the bus. I sat alone with only 11 empty seats for company.
A fact that I find humorous is that on the bus there are two rows of 12 seats, the first half, the first 6 seats on either row are heavily occupied, 3 girls sit to a bench or 2 guys. The back half of the bus is totally devoid of all life except for me. While the others remain crowded I am free to use two different seats to lie down on in peace and solitude. The front of the bus is filled with conversation, laughter and happiness while the back is dominated by silence. I will continue to sit alone in the back of the bus faithfully depositing myself next to Bill's empty seat every day until one young boy finds the courage to venture back to talk with me, and to make fun of me for sitting alone, and for all manner of things, on that day I will be completely expelled from the bus forever for breaking the boy's nose with my foot. If the boy or if anyone else on the bus had known my name, or even anything about me then I might have found myself in more serious trouble, but luckily all the time I spent in isolation was well worth it, nobody knew me.
A month after I dropped out of karate and a week after my black belt test was not I found myself sitting in the middle of my British Literature class. I no longer find myself to be so aggressive, I no longer fantasize about fighting with other people and I am generally more pleasant to be around. At the beginning of class our teacher walks into the room, she is a charming young lady who nobody really likes except me; her hand has had the misfortune of being deformed into an oft mocked claw by a crippling bout of arthritis. She sits down in her usual chair and addresses the class very slowly and carefully "I don't know quite how to say this" She begins but her voice falters. She struggles for a moment before continuing "Angie, from our class has passed away" The class gasps in unison, our teacher sheds a tear "She hung herself sometime last night" and surrenders any further notion of speech while she cries for a moment. "I want to take this class period and just have everybody talk about how they feel."
The boy sitting next to me is named Michael, he leans over to me and in a conspiratorial whisper says "Honestly, I don't really care." And I am struck by the sentiment, I cannot respond but merely stare blankly at him, Angie was a red headed girl who sat one seat in front of me and three to the left. I had never spoken to her, I did not know her, I was not her friend and as far as I knew Michael was in the same boat I was. At first I was angered by the flippancy, the sheer obscenity of his comment but then a dark and terrible enlightenment came to me, why should I care? I had never even spoken to her afterall, millions of strangers die around the world and I don't even notice why should this one person, this one stranger be any more important. Why should I care about her?
The question constantly plagues me and haunts me, I want to care about her, I heard her voice in class, I saw her and recognized her, I witnessed the world with her alive and I witnessed it without her and it was mostly the same. The world didn't care, Michael didn't care so why should I? Perhaps what distinguishes this death from the multitude of others that occur annually is that in this instance I could have done something about it. Had I known what Angie was planning I could have stopped her, had I befriended her or helped her with the problems she was apparently struggling with then in a terribly real sense I could have saved her life. I regret very few things about my life, I do not regret fighting with the kids on the bus, they deserved to be hit and so did I, I hit them and they hit me, the books balanced and everything was fine. One of the things I do regret though is never speaking with her, never smiling or saying something nice to her but just ignoring her while I lived and she died.
That entire day of class people cried and talked about their feelings, Michael drew things on his notebook cover and I tried to reason out whether the death of a teenage girl in my class should matter to me. The next day there was hardly a somber note still remaining in the air and after that everything returned to normal, soon somebody moved into her old desk and the last remanent of Angie was purged from our class, nobody really noticed that day, even I can't remember exactly when it was.
These two events are separated by a month in time, but they are related, they are alike because they are so different. If the question is, "How do you view the world" then I have no answer because there is none. I cannot name the lenses that let me see the world around me because they are so complex as to defy words but I can describe what they let me see and how and what I feel about it. I have presented these two situations from my life, not because they are great in significance but rather because they reveal something significant.
For the most part battling with other children on the bus is irrelevant to my life, but the motivations behind it are how I view the world. I can't see anything really as innocent, everyone I know, people all around me and especially myself are guilty of committing immoral actions. I have suffered no regrets over kicking another student in the face, he made fun of me in front of others, he initiated a conversation with me designed to hurt my feelings and I believe it is appropriate that I made a response designed to hurt his body. If everyone who said something mean was kicked in the face the world would be a much nicer place. The girl who sat in front of me on the bus was not especially innocent either, she knew the shoplifter had a girlfriend and yet she came back to flirt with him still. She said things that would hurt other people, namely the shoplifter's girlfriend, and other people, or some times myself, said things that hurt her. The kids on the back of the bus were always vulgar and rude in addition to their drug habits some of which I clearly witnessed from my seat on the school bus. If you look hard enough then no one alive is perfect, everyone has done something wrong and it is my karmic belief that everybody deserves what happens to them and that essentially every action is justified.
The second example I gave is my reaction to the death of a class mate of mine. One I barely knew and never spoke with. Her death has had a considerable impact on the way that I view the world, earlier in my life I viewed life and death as polar opposites, one, life, to be maintained and the other, death, to struggle to avoid. Now though I am not so sure. Angie consciously chose death over life, the question of whether her choice should matter to me is irrelevant, it does, but what is relevant is that she made the decision herself. Upon reflection on the incident for many months after it occurred I began to think, what does She know that I don't? Why do I think life is the ultimate value but she apparently found one higher? I don't profess to have any deep answers or insight here but what I do know is this, that when someone physically close to me and relatively intimate compared to the rest of the world decided to give up their own life because they didn't want it anymore I began to see the world differently. To realize that somethings may be more valuable then life while others are worse then death. These things are, in my own view the very definition of love, to prefer something over one's own life and so the second tale I told is not about the death of Angie but how I discovered meaning through her suicide.
"A single death is a tragedy, a million is only a statistic" -Joseph Stalin
User Reviews
Submitted by sword (user info) at 2005-04-29 14:47:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I hardly insult everyone rad, I respond in the manner I am addressed
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-04-29 05:00:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Why do you feel the need to insult everyone who critiques this and gives it a negative rating.
This was no masterpiece.
Submitted by sword (user info) at 2005-04-29 03:30:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
dumb fuck read the post before making your innane comments, this has already been addressed and explained
Submitted by Auron (user info) at 2005-04-29 03:19:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Sort yourself out with some personal discipline before telling me what to do.
Submitted by sword (user info) at 2005-04-28 15:42:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Williams_2004 & Auron
Dumb fucks, read the post and some of the responces before making your innane comments
Submitted by Williams_2004 (user info) at 2005-04-28 09:38:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
the fan
I did when I was in high school. Whats the matter? Is that somehow not cool enough for you?
Santa_Claus_
Legally when you reach a black belt within a recognized system of Martial Arts your body qualifies as a lethal weapon, I wasn't saying that to brag it is simply a fact.
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"Legally when you reach a black belt within a recognized system of Martial Arts your body qualifies as a lethal weapon, I wasn't saying that to brag it is simply a fact." - This is wrong. I have studied Martial Arts and Im afraid to tell you that if you was sent to court over a fight you started and they found out you did Martial Arts, no matter what belt you was on, you would find out that you was fucked. Also Karate is for pussys, its a 'Attacking' Art, In my view Martial Arts should either be for self defence, or for sport. You on the other hand are a dick head and by the sounds of things you enjoy attacking. Dick Head, Grow Up.
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2005-04-28 09:26:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Sword. When i first took up Hapkido (The Korean martial art), my instructor told me this:
"If i wanted, i could teach you how to kill a person in 2 weeks. I could teach you every move in two years. I could NOT teach you how to understand the principles, the spirit of Hapkido in 1000 years, for that is something that you must teach yourself."
The philosophical and spiritual aspects of training are 90% of Martial Arts, the physical side is merely an obvious reflection of this.
It sounds like you had a terrible dojo, where people were turned into pain-inflicting machines, with no concept of the discipline and self-improvement most martial arts are about. Perhaps if you had a fresh start in a new environment you could find full satisfaction, and i encourage you to pursue you self-improving desires to your full capacity, and become the best that you can become, both spiritually and physically, in a different Martial Arts center.
Submitted by Jungle_Jimanee (user info) at 2005-04-28 09:09:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
A good post, made me laugh and was informative in that it provided an accurate snapshot into your thinking at the time.
I need to make a few points but will have to be brief, the three hour, three way, wooden sword battle from last night has left me a bit battered.
What is lacking in this post and your life is compassion, this sounds like a criticism and sort of it is, but please hear me out.
It is often said that the greatest virtue a Samurai can have is compassion, compassion for others AND for yourself.
I find it both liberating and empowering. Before I used to get angry with assholes, now I feel pity. Most people are assholes because they are in pain and they are lashing out. My first feeling with dealing with these is sympathy, their lives must be horrible, how can I help without surrendering myself.
A quick linkwhore; here is what happens when it goes wrong: http://www.ubersite.com/m/64658
"I am bored and merely trying to pick a fight. "
I can appreciate that you have grown through the experiences in the post, however, this attitude will land you in prison or worse. But I think you know that, am I right in thinking that voluntarily leaving "The Way" as practiced by a " violent aggressive man with little self control and a drinking problem. " and are now more relaxed and chilled out.
Ugh, please forgive my ramblings, I'm in quite a bit of pain.
Submitted by Auron (user info) at 2005-04-28 07:56:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You are the kind of person who should never be allowed to learn any kind of Martial Art.
'Picking Fights' just so you can hurt someone and make yourself look 'Hard' in front of onlookers is not clever or skillfull in any way. Karate is not about 'Kicking someones head in' its about the Art, Discipline, Sportsmanship, Control and Commitment.
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-04-28 06:46:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Sorry, I just got a message, and the world is, in fact, required to conform to my personal standards for entertainment and clarity. Perhaps you simply have yet to get the memo.
I am perfectly aware of what you were/are trying to say; the deliberate misinterpretation of it was primarily to make my point about how you do need to be clearer and (dare I say it? Yes, I think I do.) more concise when you write. Or, rather, you do if you expect and/or want people to understand the point you're trying to convey. If not, feel free to carry on and continue as is.
I still don't quite understand how everyone, or even only everyone who you've met, deserves to get punched in the face. Or whatever. People make mistakes, and yes, they do bad things, but up to a certain point, you just accept it as human error and move on. I mean, if everyone was smacked around for everything that they did that was wrong or immoral, we'd all be too busy smacking each other to do anything else. It also just leads to silly, pointless escalations of violence that are utterly unnecessary. "Well, he called me a name, so I hit him, so he kicked me in my spleen, so I shot him, so he launched a small nuclear warhead at my face." Seemingly, according to your philosophy, he deserved to be hit for calling you a name, but you deserved to be kicked for hitting him, and so on, ad infinitum, for ever and ever, amen. Waste of time and energy, if you ask me.
Whatever. I'm off to take finals while in my 43d consecutive hour of awakeness. I'm so fucked...
Submitted by sword (user info) at 2005-04-28 06:16:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Well rad as it turns out past 3 in the morning you need some kind of key that I do not have to get into the law library. Seeing as how it is 3 in the morning I can't get in. I took your google finding to mean that things like this are not necessarily fixed. While I was training for my black belt test someone told me that earning a black belt meant your body would become a registered lethal weapon and I accepted that without looking any further. Anyway I made another google search and found this website http://www.jenningscc.com/TaeKwonDo/SelfDefenseLaw.htm which seems to be saying the same thing as your article, in some instances trained fighters are counted as deadly weapons. Anyway, I am going to sleep now. Goodnight
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-04-28 05:55:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
In any case, my 2 second google search found me this
http://www.tafkac.org/faq2k/legal_2007.html
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-04-28 05:53:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Sounds good.
Let me give you a tip.
If a law exists concerning this, it would exist in a state's criminal statutes, under the weapons provisions.
I really doubt that any state would legislate specifically to this, but there also may be case law.
Submitted by sword (user info) at 2005-04-28 05:45:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
rad1101
Well, I live nearby my universities law library so I will give it a try, I tried to google for it but all the results are about the movie "lethal weapon" or martial arts programs about how to make your body "a lethal weapon".
Submitted by sword (user info) at 2005-04-28 05:39:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
LadyPlural
Thanks, that was actually a more mature responce then I expected of you. Granted, you still totally missed the point but thats ok, now you are learning. I won't argue with you over whose kung fu is better then whose because quite frankly I don't give a shit. My intention was not to make myself sound like a badass and if you paid attention to my post I think you would have understood that. I won't try to defend my character back then because I honestly liked it about as much as you do.
" There are hundreds of websites for you to get your introspection on"
Thanks, there is also a little place called ubersite, where, if I understand correctly, I can post whatever the fuck I want (so long as its not illegal). Until the "whatever the fuck I want" rule changes I am going to keep putting up whatever pleases me.
"please at least try and make it interesting"
Some people found it interesting. I found it interesting to write (though likely because it is about me). In case you hadn't realized interest is subjective, it is a matter of opinion, don't presume to impose your opinions on everyone else.
"you have a very naive and foolish world-view"
In the words of jumpinjellyfish I am "still fairly young" and I plan on doing a lot more maturing in the future. I can see how, if you made a literal interpretation of my karmic belief, you might think my world view was foolish. Instead of literally EVERY human being getting what they deserve I think a more clear expression of what I meant was everyone in my tale. Like I explained I didn't feel bad about hitting people or making fun of them because everyone who I have ever gotten to know has turned out to be fully deserving of whatever comes to them. This is a hard idea for me to express so please forgive me if it comes out poorly.
The Overlord are not plural
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-04-28 05:30:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by sword (user info) at 2005-04-26 20:58:46 (#)
Ranking: 0
Legally when you reach a black belt within a recognized system of Martial Arts your body qualifies as a lethal weapon, I wasn't saying that to brag it is simply a fact.
==============================================================
I was wondering if you could dig up the exact law that states this.
kthxby
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-04-28 05:16:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I know this may be a strange little exercise for you to do, but I want you to try reeeeeeeeeeaaaly hard and think reeeeeeeaaaaaly carefully about this.
Consider, for example, the possibility that I know more about martial arts than what Hollywood 'teaches' me. Consider that I might even have taken several different forms of martial arts. And *then* I want you to consider that, to quote 'Fight Club', "sticking feathers up your butt does not make you a chicken." Just because you learned how to fight does not mean that you learned a form of martial arts. You learned how to inflict pain on others, but apparently without the self-discipline or restraint that accompanies such knowledge in a real dojo. I'm not saying that you're a bad person for that lack; what I *am* saying is that you did not learn Karate. If you think about it, martial arts are known as disciplines for a reason other than the physical discipline involved. And I'm sure that you're an utterly tough badass who eats little old ladies for breakfast.
Enough with arguing semantics. If I may quote you, "The reason I wrote this was simply self reflection, of course its rambling as *it is simply my thoughts about some things that happened in my life.*" There are hundreds of websites for you to get your introspection on- have you considered just keeping a LiveJournal instead? I do not claim that there is no place on Ubersite for reflection, but if you're going to inflict it on us, please at least try and make it interesting. Or failing interesting, could you at least shoot for 'not so verbose that any point you had is lost in the droning "blah blah blah" of your narrative'?
I was wrong in calling you spoiled- your post does not reflect that, and I apologize. Essentially,
what I intended to say was that you have a very naive and foolish world-view. To wit; "If you look hard enough then no one alive is perfect, everyone has done something wrong and it is my karmic belief that everybody deserves what happens to them and that essentially every action is justified."
That attitude is, if I may be so bold as to say so, fucking insane, dangerous, and stupid. "Everybody deserves what happens to them"? I mean, I can accept that to some degree, one's actions determine how those nearby will interact with one, but how in the name of anything can you say that any person deserves to starve to death in Africa just because of where they were born? For that matter, speaking of Africa, try reading about the genocide that occurred in Rwanda a bit over ten years ago. Do you actually believe that *anyone*, no matter what they may or may not have done in their life, deserves to be raped to death with, say, a knife? I'm not going to get started listing all of the things that nobody will EVER deserve, but I'm sure that you can think of a few on your own.
The universe is supremely indifferent to everything, "karma" included.
The Overlord are not impressed.
Submitted by sword (user info) at 2005-04-28 03:26:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Phallic_Cymbals
I don't know where you got this impression of martial arts but it certainly doesn't conform to my own experiance. I am not an expert on martial arts in general by any means but I do know how we practiced and trained at the school I went to and what we trained for. What we trained for was to fight and hurt people.
Classes were composed of working out, surface toughening (kicking your shin into your partners for long periods of time, punching the floor, forearming your opponents forearm and etcetera), practicing the basics (learning where to hit someone and how) and then sparring. We didn't learn anything at all about "Martial Arts philosophy" and my own personal philosophy reflects just what I was taught.
LadyPlural
"to have to tell you this, but the post really honestly was just rambling"
" A spoiled, cocky, annoying wad of cunt-snot who rambles and won't admit it. "
Those were your quotes, here is one of mine.
"I wrote this was simply self reflection, of course its rambling as it is simply my thoughts about some things that happened in my life"
Thanks for the brilliant insight that this was rambling though Sherlock. You have really put your deductive skills to good use here.
As I explained to Phallic_Cymbols not all martial arts conform to what you saw on the karate kid. The variety I took taught one thing and that was violence and that is all I learned from it. As far as my instructor's capability goes he had no way of way knowing how I acted out of class and I suspect he wouldn't care. He was a lot like I would be if I dedicated my life to karate. He was a violent aggressive man with little self control and a drinking problem. He may have been "incompetent and foolish" but he knew how to hurt people and at the time it was all I wanted.
This said I don't particularly like talking about my experiance with Martial arts, it was not a good time for me looking back on it. This post is not about Karate. That section was included to describe how I felt about humanity and morality in general and I included it to provide contrast to my experiance with Angie.
" is very little more than a spoiled, cocky, annoying wad of cunt-snot"
Spoiled? I don't really see how and I'd enjoy seeing you explain that. Cocky? No doubt about that at all as I clearly explained in my post.
Summation
A) Yes this post rambled a bit but everything I wrote was tightly connected.
B) Meh
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2005-04-28 01:19:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
"I have been training myself to hurt other people and the result is that I have become exceptionally violent and aggressive in all aspects of life"
You have the worst Martial Arts philosophy I have ever seen. If you want to be a thug, why didn't you do kickboxing?
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-04-28 00:48:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
O'm so sorry to have to tell you this, but the post really honestly was just rambling. About half of it should have been edited out. It did ramble, and what's more, it didn't ramble in an entertaining fashion.
Call me crazy, but I was always under the impression that Karate and other martial arts promoted peace, inner calm, and self-control. Furthermore, even if Karate *was* having such an effect on you, any instructor with half a brain would realize that maybe you should be doing something else. If this is a true story (and it's so filled with inconsequential minutae that I can't think it is anything other than true), your instructor(s) were incompetent and foolish to continue teaching someone who, based on what you said in your post alone (and I'm sure that in reality you're a lovely human being who shits daffodils and who writes nothing but True, Everlasting Arte), is very little more than a spoiled, cocky, annoying wad of cunt-snot. A spoiled, cocky, annoying wad of cunt-snot who rambles and won't admit it.
You seem to have at least a modicum of talent; between the pointless sections of drivel there were several good phrases and ideas. I've seen other things that you've written, and although none of them were great, they didn't suck. You just need to work on how you tell your story.
Summation:
A) This post rambled more than a blind man with Alzheimer's.
B) Your prose needs more tightening than, say, my grandmother's twat. And she had 6 kids and is dead besides.
Submitted by the_mysterious_stranger (user info) at 2005-04-27 11:31:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Very insightful.
Obviously, the post was not "incoherent rambling", as some reviews have stated, since the two events described here are connected with each other. Plus, I think I somehow recognized myself in your outlook on the world. Why did you quit karate, anyway?
Submitted by Dead_0hi0_Sky (user info) at 2005-04-27 11:07:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
"The word "What" was cleverly omitted, I think it sounds angrier this way"
Submitted by jumpinjellyfish (user info) at 2005-04-27 10:58:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This was much better than most of the crap I've read on Uber. I like the insightful style and the honest self assessment.
I get the feeling that your are still fairly young and I hope you continue to grow and mature by learning from the things that happen around you.
A bit of advice...there is no weakness in being kind. You should reserve your violent reactions for when they are truly needed. It took me a long time to learn that.
Submitted by knucklesnelson (user info) at 2005-04-27 08:00:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Haha you ride the school bus.
Submitted by sword (user info) at 2005-04-27 04:06:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i agree ducky, i don't particularly like who I was back then. The thing is I had been taking karate 2 hours a day 6 days a week for about 4 years. Being exposed to that much violence made me a violent person or it brought out the violent qualities I already possesed. Either way when I finally did quit my karate program I became a lot calmer and I haven't gotten in a single fight since. This might not be entertaining to read but it was a lot of fun to write.
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2005-04-27 03:50:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Some of that was really cold. Not bad, but I've liked some of your other stuff better.
Submitted by sword (user info) at 2005-04-27 01:32:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
dodahdave
The reason I wrote this was simply self reflection, of course its rambling as it is simply my thoughts about some things that happened in my life. If you don't posses the motive to read it all then it is too long for you personally. So fucking what? Give me a minus 2 then or whatever but please stop trying to give me your totally irrelevant advice. I don't even know you but I don't like you and even if what you had to say was brilliant and insightful (it's not) I would ignore it.
What is the point of posting it on ubersite? Because I feel like it. Do I want feedback on my writing? Sure, why not? Go nuts. But please, if you, the great omnipotent word master, deign to give me advice in the future try and give some advice that isn't so cosmically moronic.
"This WAS too long, and somewhat rambling"
Whoa I must have missed the section of the universe's rule book where it said writing had to be concsice, thanks for bringing up the absolute truth that this was in fact WAY too long. I owe you one buddy.
"It needs serious editing"
Yeah, I suppose in the future I should make a few drafts, run it by my english teacher and spend a few weeks revising it. You know, like you obviously do with all your posts.
"Seriously, wake up and realize that you are not your writing, and that criticism is not a personal attack. "
I thought this entire review was a joke until I read that word "Seriously" then I realized, oh shit he is serious. This guy really wants me to stop insulting people or something like that. Seriously though, fuck off. In the earlier reviews I made I just described why I thought those people were wrong. I am not personally offended by their reviews and I don't expect them to be offended by mine.
Submitted by DonovanMD (user info) at 2005-04-27 00:23:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Don't let Krusty's death get you down, boy. People die all the time.
Just like that. Why, you could wake up dead tomorrow. Well, good night.
-- Homer Simpson
Bart the Fink
Submitted by DavyJones (user info) at 2005-04-26 23:28:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
At least this post has words.
Submitted by dodahdave (user info) at 2005-04-26 23:02:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by sword (user info) at 2005-04-26 21:35:25 (#)
Ranking: 0
LadyPlural
I'm sorry your opinion is wrong, this post is quite coherent and if you don't understand it the problem is obviously on your end.
right_wing_extremist
Thanks for advertising your deficiencies. In the future feel free to keep facts pertaining to the longevity of your attention span to yourself. Thanks.
------------------------------------------------------
Let me ask you a question: what is the point of posting on Uber?
To get some feedback on your writing? Or to massage your ego through the confirmation of your own high opinion of yourself?
This WAS too long, and somewhat rambling. It needs serious editing.
Seriously, wake up and realize that you are not your writing, and that criticism is not a personal attack.
Submitted by AlwaysAnEagle (user info) at 2005-04-26 22:42:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
This wasn't...bad? The story was decent, I thought, but a little forced...I think that's just a sign of your effort though. If you edited, go back and undo about half of it; if you didn't, give it a read and change the things that you remember being clunky when you finish each paragraph.
If you want actual line by line appraisal, let me know, but I don't want to go too far into it if you're not going to care.
Submitted by sword (user info) at 2005-04-26 21:35:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
LadyPlural
I'm sorry your opinion is wrong, this post is quite coherent and if you don't understand it the problem is obviously on your end.
right_wing_extremist
Thanks for advertising your deficiencies. In the future feel free to keep facts pertaining to the longevity of your attention span to yourself. Thanks.
Submitted by right_wing_extremist (user info) at 2005-04-26 21:08:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Too long. I lost interest half way through.
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-04-26 21:07:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
I know that you don't have to possess, say, the ability to write a coherent post in order to earn a black belt, but I think that it should be a consideration.
Submitted by sword (user info) at 2005-04-26 20:58:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
the fan
I did when I was in high school. Whats the matter? Is that somehow not cool enough for you?
Santa_Claus_
Legally when you reach a black belt within a recognized system of Martial Arts your body qualifies as a lethal weapon, I wasn't saying that to brag it is simply a fact.
Submitted by shadowofthedivine (user info) at 2005-04-26 20:49:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
We share similar outlooks,
it was a worthy story
but goddamn man, you were an asshole
Submitted by Santa_Claus_ (user info) at 2005-04-26 20:43:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
"hey man when i get my black bely i'm gonna be super dangerous you better watch out these hands are gonna be lethal weapons man!!"
Get a life.
Submitted by Mr.Brightside (user info) at 2005-04-26 20:36:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
its not anyones obligation to care, but nobody should broadcast their indifference to everyone around who might
Submitted by The_Fan (user info) at 2005-04-26 20:28:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You ride a school bus?