Gratification (467 hits)
Category: Quotes & StoriesRating: 1.29 on 7 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Sarah Prejean <derivablezero.at.gmail.com> (View user info) at 2005-05-01 12:57:43 EDT
The man at the counter wearing a three piece suit, wing tips, and a shiny wedding band has a nervous smile and twitch in his eye as I bag for him the latest issue of "Hustler". He's wearing church clothes and on the cover there's a buxom blonde with letters promising hot, wet fun.
The guy behind him, he's old with spots on his hands and face (and soul); wrinkles, too. He's wearing an old John Deere cap faded to a light yellow and his toothless, quivering jaw asks me "How's business today?" as he puts a copy of "Barely Legal" on the counter and I feel the vomit rise in my throat.
Beyond him is a housewife, mid-40s with two point five children and a copy of "Marie Claire" grasped in her french manicured hands--now she'll know how to look and dress and her son behind her holds a new pack of Yu-Gi-Oh and shining eyes with dreams of Japanese culture hiding within them. He'll buy manga here sooner or later.
Even further in the line with huge, mothball-scented blue hair is a grandmother with a thing for "Inches". She and John Deere man deserve each other.
The middle aged asshole who just walked in with a huge frown is telling me I'm a sinner for working on the Sabbath then he winks and asks me for "Busty".
I do what I'm paid for: ring up customers; bite my cheeks to hold back grins. It's all observation anyway. Like them, this is my indulgence.
This is my pornography.
User Reviews
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2005-05-02 13:55:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by DerivableZero (user info) at 2005-05-01 13:05:01 (#)
Ranking: 2
It's very funny. I love me some dry humor. :D
____
thanks Sarah, 'dry humor' rarely works here, since most people are too stupid to get it.
Submitted by choc_bongo (user info) at 2005-05-02 10:13:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by DJMattB241 (user info) at 2005-05-01 17:20:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i'm the same way...
Submitted by Or_ (user info) at 2005-05-01 15:36:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Interesting read. I've read that "vomit rising in my throat" phrase a lot on here. That's just a phrase, right, or do girls actually come close to vomitting that easily?
Submitted by joedaddy (user info) at 2005-05-01 14:44:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
OK
Submitted by Quasiplasmohedron (user info) at 2005-05-01 14:13:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Not bad at all.
Submitted by rick_the_stud (user info) at 2005-05-01 13:17:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
slightly cliched, but nice style.
bravo.