Holy fuck I’m bored (638 hits)
Category: GeneralRating: 1.5 on 8 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by yermom (View user info) at 2005-05-03 19:49:47 EDT
Holy fuck I'm bored. Yeah I know you probably are too, otherwise you wouldn't be reading this crap. Right? Right. Anyway, So I'm sitting here at the office waiting for my phone to ring and counting down the minutes until I can go home and watch The Office, then The Shield twice in a row. It's kind of weird, but for some reason watching The Office on TV is so much better than actually being here.
Now for some totally random observations from today, I had lunch at subway today, and I noticed that underneath the cleverly concealed suggestion on how to "accidentally" let your kid suffocate, there's a message that says "United States Version Subway Bag".
This got me thinking, is the US the only country stupid enough to need warning labels on its' bag, or am I looking at it from the wrong angle? What kind of warning labels would they put on other country's bags? Would Poland's bag say remove sandwich from bag before eating Would China's bag actually give instructions on how to suffocate unwanted female children?
I live in Cleveland, it's now May, we had flurries last night and a balmy high of 45 today, needless to say I'm disgusted, and the cold weather hasn't stopped my summer road rage from rearing its ugly head again. I bitch and moan about the drivers here in Ohio, but I've been back and forth between here and the DC metro area a lot recently, and man those people drive worse than a bunch of old Asian women. Holy fucking Christ, nothing makes me want to slam head on into a concrete bridge support than someone doing 15 mph under the speed limit in the fast lane because god knows they really needed to cut you off.
I've also become aware of my seething hatred for vanity license plates, not necessarily all of them, but specifically the ones thanking someone for buying them the car. I saw one today that said "THXDADY". Eat my ass you stupid little bitch, I hope you get impaled by one of the loosely tied down pipes on that flat bed's ass you're riding. Anyway, I'm not really in a pissy mood, I just find it easier to write about things I find annoying, plus, lets be honest, those are the things that you really notice most often in the day anyway.
Oh yeah, as an added bonus I blew a blood vessel in my eye, so along with the numerous stares, and questions of my optometric health, I have that to look forward too, so I thought you'd all enjoy seeing that. Take care Uber, I'm out of here for today.
User Reviews
Submitted by Sassmasterr (user info) at 2005-07-01 13:00:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/58821
nasty eyes
Submitted by funk_boy (user info) at 2005-05-04 04:18:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for bloody eye.
When i smashed my head up in a motorcycle accident, my whole eye went that colour.
Submitted by MrCoffee (user info) at 2005-05-03 23:20:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
In Aus, our bags are bright green with racing stripes and cleverly concaled fireworks for when that footlong meatball sub gets the better of your bowels.
(actualy i think its pretty similar, but with some Australian nutrition info on it)
Submitted by Girlwithaclue (user info) at 2005-05-03 22:46:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
top poking yourself in the eye man....It hurts and leaves marks!!
Submitted by TheSpook (user info) at 2005-05-03 22:32:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
My nutsack can hit better than Aaron Boone.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2005-05-03 21:20:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Wooooo!! Go Browns!!! Fuck you Art Modell!!! I miss my dog..
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-05-03 20:55:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I STILL can't decide if The Office is funny or not.
I know I want to drill that Steve Karell in the face a couple of times, though.
Submitted by williamson (user info) at 2005-05-03 20:05:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for general whining.