Ducky Explores Vancouver's West End and Sees U2 (1127 hits)
Category: GeneralRating: 1.21 on 31 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Ducky (View user info) at 2005-05-04 12:53:01 EDT
Well good people of Uber, I've been to see U2, and let me just say that it was a fucking excellent show! I'm not a huge U2 fan myself, but in terms of performance, nothing was lacking...except for the part where Bono decided to lie down and writhe on the stage. That part I could have missed.
So my best friend and I get into Van. and once we've somehow managed to make it to the hotel without killing or maiming anyone (ourselves included), we decide to go for a walk and do some shopping. Let me tell you about the West End of Vancouver. Everyone is gay, lesbian, tranny, or otherwise. Well, okay so not everyone, but close. Partway down the street we smell incense, and are eventually lured by the powers of Nag Champa into the worlds smallest hippie hut. After the most flamboyant (and cute) gay man I've ever seen in my life shows me every stick of incense in the joint, tells me the latin name of every ingredient in said sticks, and praises the value of said sticks, I feel like I'd be cheating myself by not buying some. I mean, some guy rode for days on a stinky mule in the rain and hail, travelled to the most obscure part of France imaginable, climbed a mountain, risked life and limb in a rockslide, and then lovingly picked the ingredients JUST FOR ME. I smile and grab a pack of vanilla hazelnut and head for the till.
"That incense is veeeeery good sweetie. It's made in France you know."
"Neato...you know, you really seem to love your job. It's very refreshing to see."
"Darling, sometimes I love it, and sometimes I absolutely hate it. Will you use these?" He holds out some rolling papers with a very foppish wrist.
"They're verrrrry good you know. They're made in France. (whispers) I'll give them to you if you like."
I wanted to take this guy home and be his fag hag. No, seriously. we had room in the car, and if not we had a ski rack and some rope.
He places my purchase onto a sheet of fuschia tissue paper. Then another piece. Then another. You get the jist. I walk out of there with the brightest and most elaborately decorated box of incense in the world. It was so goddam bright that people were blinded by it as the sun glinted off the fiery pinkness. I feel I am directly responsible for causing no less than 3 car accidents because people were blinded by glowing fuschia. Anyways...
80 fucking blocks later, we're back at the hotel. Just enough time to get dressed and head out for the concert. I'll leave my camera at home. I don't want it confiscated. Every concert I've been to lately has come hand in hand with purse searching and the female security guard feel-up. No camera for me. EVERYONE had a fucking camera in there. There was no searching or anything. FUCK. Anyways, I don't have any pictures from the show, but they did play a lot of their older stuff, and when Sunday Bloody Sunday came on, my best friend was ecstatic. I don't doubt for a moment that if they'd meglected to play that song, the song I had the pleasure of listening to on FUCKING REPEAT for the 4 FUCKING HOUR DRIVE DOWN....
"This one is acoustic."
"This one is live."
"This one is extended."
"This is the Kurdish football chant version."
"AAAAARRRRGHHHHHHHH."
..., she'd have had no qualms about kicking the ass of every security guard at the venue, jumping onto the stage, donkey-punching Bono, Edge, and what's his face in the nuts, and jamming her Vertigo keychain into Bono's eyesocket in front of all his adoring fans.
But they played it, so she's happy.
User Reviews
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-11-19 18:17:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm the reason this post has as many hits as it does.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-11-19 18:09:36 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Bono has weird eyes
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-11-19 17:55:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You are very beautiful.
And your camera bag is astutely shading your pubis.
Submitted by tuesdaydelay (user info) at 2005-07-16 08:02:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You look like Bono. But he's got bigger tits.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2005-07-16 07:47:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Nah, she's married thorpe.
But is it wrong that i keep scrolling to her crotch?
.. stupid camera bag....
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2005-07-16 07:44:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Uh-oh - Danger's on the prowl. Again.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2005-07-16 07:42:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
yes you did...
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-07-16 07:31:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I told you.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2005-07-16 07:30:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
dimples..
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2005-07-16 07:29:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
w-w-wow...........
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2005-06-18 07:14:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
thanks Rad. Braces sucked.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-06-18 06:44:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You have nice teeth.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-05-24 07:32:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You look nice.
Submitted by The_Fan (user info) at 2005-05-23 00:38:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You're smoking hot in a lululemon Kitsilano kind of way. Where in BC do you live?
Submitted by Neener (user info) at 2005-05-23 00:10:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
-2 for being too big
-2 for not having a pic of me
-2 for meglected
-2 for making fun of me and my love for Sunday Bloody Sunday
+2 for being my bestfriend
+2 for me being there to experience it all
Bono, Edge, Larry, Adam, love you guy!!!!
Submitted by Siren (user info) at 2005-05-21 01:55:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It occurred to me that I don't read your posts very often. So, here you go.
Submitted by BillsSBChamps (user info) at 2005-05-16 02:07:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
hey here's a =2 and a fuck you.
Submitted by Technoboy (user info) at 2005-05-06 13:37:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2005-05-04 14:05:27 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Technoboy (user info) at 2005-05-04 13:40:24 (#)
Ranking: 1
Whats with all the tankers in the background?
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Fuck you! Those are Canadian aircraft carriers!
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What the fuck can you carry with those? Bi-planes armed with bags of flour?
Submitted by G-prime (user info) at 2005-05-04 17:15:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Do you go to Richmond IHS?
Submitted by G-prime (user info) at 2005-05-04 17:14:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I love you. Except for Bono. He's an ok guy, though, I guess... Did you hear him on CBC radio last weekend when he said everybody should call Paul Martin and tell him how outraged they are about him messing up the Kyoto? He then proceeded to say the prime minister's home phone number. On air, over CBC. "I want to give Canada his phone number.... If anyone's listening, I would call Paul. It's 613 992-4211."
A bit of a mean thing to do... But whatever, he IS the prime minister, and the citizens are his employers. The employer should be able to contact the employee any time. The employer should also be able to fire the employee.
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2005-05-04 16:59:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Scroll...tsk, tsk.
Submitted by strider (user info) at 2005-05-04 14:36:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
...and +2 for this:
"Fuck you! Those are Canadian aircraft carriers!" - C
Submitted by strider (user info) at 2005-05-04 14:35:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for "fag hag"
You're a cutie. BC is a very cool place except for the ginormous amount of rain.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2005-05-04 14:18:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
everything's huger in Canada, eh?
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2005-05-04 14:05:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Technoboy (user info) at 2005-05-04 13:40:24 (#)
Ranking: 1
Whats with all the tankers in the background?
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Fuck you! Those are Canadian aircraft carriers!
Submitted by Technoboy (user info) at 2005-05-04 13:40:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Whats with all the tankers in the background?
Submitted by MichaelJackson (user info) at 2005-05-04 13:14:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Bono and I got into a fight once. He kicked my ass. (He had brass knuckles on, the cheat) I don't like to talk about it :(
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2005-05-04 13:11:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Uh...yeah, that's why the picture was so big. It's because I wanted everyone to see it and think Canada and all it's inhabitants are big. Yup. That's why. Not because I fucked it up. I was making a statement. On. Purpose. It is impossible to be as big as Bono's ego. Who writhes on the stage? Really?
Submitted by MichaelJackson (user info) at 2005-05-04 13:03:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Is your image trying to compete with Bono's ego?
Otherwise I have a strong urge to +2 this post, maybe it's because Canada is looking like a good place to hide right now... how big is the space under your bed?
Shamone!
Submitted by knucklesnelson (user info) at 2005-05-04 12:54:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
mommy my eyes hurt
Submitted by Ducky (user info) at 2005-05-04 12:54:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Holy fuck I'm enormous...Sorry bout that.