Evolution of a Family (859 hits)
Category: NoneLabels: fiction
Rating: 1.74 on 23 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Corn Nugget (View user info) at 2005-05-10 23:25:27 EDT
Hello, I'm Alice. I was born in Michigan, raised by my German father and my Polish mother. As far as siblings go, originally, there were ten of us.
The first real death in the family was Tommy. Tommy, the youngest child, the one who we all adored and coddled. Tommy with the shining mahogany hair and brilliant smile. Tommy with the black coffin that reflected the sun, so we all had to shade our eyes against his death.
The first death also happens to be the most sensational. When he was 18 he got stabbed, twice, in the back. As I realize every family wants to preserve their loved ones in the best light, I can assure you that this is a true story, un-edited, un-revised, and truly... um, true.
Tommy went to the bar with some friends. In the 1970's Livonia was still a quiet town. Of course we encountered the riff-raff from downriver and Detroit on occasion, but for the most part, we felt safe.
So, Tommy went, safely, to the bar with some friends. They sat inside for a few hours, drinking Strohs and toking on their Lucky Strikes. Once in a while a girl would stroll by, flipping her hair and tossing about flirty smiles. As the night rolled into morning, they decided to leave.
Tommy and his friends headed for the door, but Tommy was distracted by the woman with the eyes. The woman who called to him, with her eyes. His friends went ahead, and he stopped, just for a moment, to flirt.
After spending just enough time with this flaxen haired beauty, Tommy trotted along, trying to catch up with his friends. They were only a block away, and he quickly caught up.
His friends jovially greeted him, jostled him, teased him about his roving ways. One friend, in the midst of a friendly push, fell against a parked car. The side mirror, as luck would have it, was damaged, and hung loose, torn from the car.
In this instant- the instant when the friends realized they broke someones car, the instant when time freezes and you wonder what should be done- the flaxen beauty emerged from the bar, on the arm of a scrawny punk.
The friends knew, with only one look her way, that the car must be hers. They weren't left to guess for long, for she immediately dropped her shawl and purse, and stood screaming and pointing.
Scrawny Punk didn't even know what was happening, but as boys often do- he sprang into action, at his girls behalf.
Tommy, being the least drunk of all of them, stepped between the Scrawny Punk and the Clumsy Friend. He offered forgiveness, explained the accident away and in the end, even offered his own watch as payment.
Drunks are insatiable, this does not change. A drunk with a knife is worse yet- he is indestructible.
Yes, as Tommy turned away from the scrawny punk, hoping to hold back his friend (who had inadvertently been riled by the commotion, and was egging the fight on a bit), he was stabbed. Twice, in the back.
I was not there for this scene. I was only present for the scene at my house.
The house, being only three bedrooms, housing 12 people, was never quiet. The night Tommy died, silence rang through, shaking the doors, rattling the windows.
User Reviews
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2005-05-11 15:25:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by jumpinjellyfish (user info) at 2005-05-11 15:17:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Good post.
Submitted by thaumaturge (user info) at 2005-05-11 11:53:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Love the flow. You are a damn fine writer.
Submitted by Santa_Claus_ (user info) at 2005-05-11 11:49:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I've killed so many that thier faces all blur together.
Submitted by vodka7tall (user info) at 2005-05-11 11:31:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I have no comment.
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2005-05-11 11:01:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
There is something missing... you see, at the begining I eluded to unvieling all the family deaths, and then I only gave you one. I'd say I'm going to make this into a series, but nobody reads series, so... I'll be posting on each and every death, soon.
And Phuzzy, why can't you come camping? And my answer to your proposal is no. I am never going to marry anyone. Ever. But, if I were to marry someone, I would keep you in mind.
Submitted by Darshiscool (user info) at 2005-05-11 10:06:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
thats terrible.
Submitted by MANICMOTHER (user info) at 2005-05-11 09:54:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Bring on the pain, Corny, we can handle it.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2005-05-11 08:56:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by phuzzygish (user info) at 2005-05-11 06:01:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by phuzzygish (user info) at 2005-05-03 04:09:17 (#)
Ranking: 2
MARRY ME CORINNE!!!
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And I wanna come camping! :(
Submitted by Saxon (user info) at 2005-05-11 02:33:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I too felt something missing miss nugget but good work anyways.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-05-11 02:00:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I cannot watch Bush give a speech now without imagining him with 3 arms and 2 heads.
Submitted by Stabkill (user info) at 2005-05-11 01:13:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I hate sparkle city...I'm there at least four times a year.
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2005-05-11 01:11:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
HAHA who wants to hear the grossest thing ever?
I've had TERRIBLE allergies the past few days... snot dripping from my nose, throat hurting, etc etc etc... and it would get so bad at night that I would end up on the verge of tears.
I've never had allergies this bad!!
Then, just now, I was cleaning off my little nightstand thing that sits at the end of my bed.
Yeaaaaah... Someone (ahem) drank half a cup of coffee... oh... looks like... two weeks ago? And left it.
Just a bit of mold in that cup.
No wonder.
Yes, so, who wants to get married?
Submitted by Banga3386 (user info) at 2005-05-11 00:55:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2005-05-10 23:36:45 (#)
Ranking: 2
I'll give you a +2 because I have a feeling that there should be more to this...
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-05-11 00:31:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
aw man.
that's awful.
Submitted by hungovermondays (user info) at 2005-05-11 00:17:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
ouch.
the good ones always die, they are too pure to live here.
sorry
Submitted by shandythedog (user info) at 2005-05-10 23:47:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i quite like the tone of this
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2005-05-10 23:45:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Degreeless_Capibara (user info) at 2005-05-10 23:27:12 (#)
Ranking: 0
My hair stylist is Polish and married to a German named Kaiser.
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You go to Phil's too??
Submitted by Targa (user info) at 2005-05-10 23:41:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
You don't answer my call
With even a nod or a twitch
But you gaze at your own reflection!
You don't seem to see me
But I think you can see yourself.
How can the mirror affect you?
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2005-05-10 23:37:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Michigan? Isn't there some camping thingy in Michigan sometime?
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2005-05-10 23:36:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'll give you a +2 because I have a feeling that there should be more to this...
Submitted by Degreeless_Capibara (user info) at 2005-05-10 23:27:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
My hair stylist is Polish and married to a German named Kaiser.