All Women Are Whores (12857 hits)
Category: GraphicsRating: 0.32 on 90 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Hot Carl (View user info) at 2005-05-12 12:15:52 EDT
Bitches--
These facts we consider self-evident:
1.) Women have cunts therefore they are cunts.
2.) Lying to a women doesn't really count because they don't count as people.
3.) At some point every women has dreamed about being a hooker.
4.) Women are objects.
5.) Every girl over the age of 16 deserves a good anal pounding. Even if it's rape.
How To Train Your Whore
1.) Housekeeping
Women have inferior brains when compared to men, this is why their main job in life is to do the laundry, dishes and other chores. When you're first breaking your new whore in, always use the threat of rape and violence to enforce your authority over her. Make sure she has plenty of cover up make up and large sunglasses for those days you forget to take your rings off. Because most women are illiterate, I suggest you take a picture of your home and how you like to see it--tape it to the kitchen floor right next to the dog bowl so that every time she's thirsty, she'll be reminded of her duties in life.
2.) Sex
This one should be self-explanitory.
It's important to start training your whore early in life--tie her up, punch her in the tits a little, use large rough objects as anal probes. This is all pretty normal stuff. Remember to instill in her at an early age that she is nothing more than a sperm dump. Ass poundings should be given at least twice a week, forced sex--or 'rape' as the christians like to call it, should occur even more often. Don't forget the value of random beatings, they work great.
Notes:
1-When in public, keep your whore on a tight leash, and remind her frequently to shut the fuck up. Their mouths aren't communication devices--they're sperm vacuums.
2-If your whore starts to put on weight lock her up in the basement with a bowl of water and a bucket to piss in. If the need arises, only give her one bucket.
3-Trailer trash whores with young daughters are great--start beating the younger whore around the age of ten, when the mother whore gets raped out, kill her and dump the body. Continue onwards with your new whore--and repeat as required.
User Reviews
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-06-01 12:24:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Nominated for best ever
http://www.ubersite.com/m/88541
Submitted by Yams (user info) at 2005-07-05 16:23:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Interesting point, shitfuck.
Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2005-05-27 06:46:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Lets_B_Friends (user info) at 2005-05-12 17:45:13 (#)
Ranking: 2
SHITFUCK IS NOT AN ALTER
HE IS GOD
Submitted by Twiddle (user info) at 2005-05-27 06:39:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I am a manwhore and yes you too can have some of this sweet ass for only: $49.99
if you respond in the next 10 minutes I'll make it: $27.50
thats a savings of .....uh ......uh ....fuck i went to public school ...uh $22.49
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-05-27 06:35:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Been to Saudi Arabia lately? You'd love it there.
Submitted by funk_boy (user info) at 2005-05-27 06:28:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Still funny. The 'notes' are priceless.
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2005-05-27 06:13:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I didn't read this but I was saying the title a few nights ago.
Submitted by Chillax (user info) at 2005-05-27 06:02:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
How has this a positive rating?
Submitted by Socialist_Joe (user info) at 2005-05-13 16:16:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
art
Submitted by Lynne (user info) at 2005-05-13 15:44:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I've missed you during my hiatus, shitfuck.
Submitted by Eggy1988 (user info) at 2005-05-13 15:23:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Haha, you're a comedic genius!
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2005-05-13 02:05:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
All my whores are belong to shitfuck1!!!!!!!
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2005-05-13 02:02:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
ALL MY SPERM IS IN RAD'S DOG PIPER!!!@
Submitted by Siren (user info) at 2005-05-13 02:01:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Boooooooooooooooooooorrrrrrrriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnngggggggg!!!!!!!
Not very offensive for an obvious hitwhoring post. You suck at this.
Submitted by BillsSBChamps (user info) at 2005-05-13 01:56:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
ALL MY SPERM IS IN RADS WIFE!!!!!!!!1
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2005-05-13 01:54:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
ALL WIVES ARE RAD'S WHORES!!!!!11$
Submitted by BillsSBChamps (user info) at 2005-05-13 01:49:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
ALL WHORES ARE RADS WIFE!!!!!!!!!1
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2005-05-13 01:48:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
ALL WHORES ARE RAD!!
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2005-05-13 01:45:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I didn't not fuck her.
Submitted by BillsSBChamps (user info) at 2005-05-13 01:44:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
my grammies is a whore?
explains why she is always sucking my cock.
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2005-05-13 01:35:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You bore me.
Get inspired or get raped, I don't care which.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2005-05-13 01:28:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Get to the clinic, Buttfuck, quick.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-05-13 01:28:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
ALL RADS ARE WHORES!!
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2005-05-13 01:26:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
What the shit is with your preoccupation with gay dad sex?
My parents are both dead.
I'm not digging him up just to rim job a corpse.
You probably would.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2005-05-13 01:16:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2005-05-13 00:50:56 (#)
Ranking: 0
Seriously, SHUT THE FUCK UP DANGER MANGER - Daddy's trying to concentrate. That's it Dad - oh yeah, you're my Daddy. No, no, I won't wipe it off, I promise.
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2005-05-13 00:50:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Seriously, SHUT THE FUCK UP DANGER MANGER.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2005-05-12 22:57:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Meh - lesbians. This is a very profound social commentary, Carl, and you are a fucktard.
Plead your case, but it won't stop your Daddy pounding your arse. Nice work.
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2005-05-12 22:37:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You are a genius who happens to be misunderstood in his own time.
Submitted by The_Yellow_Dart (user info) at 2005-05-12 22:24:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2005-05-12 18:10:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
WHAT ABOUT ME FUCKING YOU IN YOUR SLEEP?\
OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH SNAP!
Submitted by CookieLass (user info) at 2005-05-12 17:53:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2005-05-12 14:47:00 (#)
Ranking: 2
....
YOU HAVE GREEN NIPPLES
How did you know that! Stop spying on me!
I WOULDNT SUCK THEM FOR A MILLION DOLLARS
Good. If you suck them, they'll fall off.
YOU ARE AFRAID OF FLYING
Man! Stop betraying my weaknesses to my enemies! I have several Arch-Nemeses you know.
YOU THINK PEOPLE LIKE YOU FOR YOUR PERSONALITY
No I don't. I know they only like me for my tits and my car.
Submitted by Lets_B_Friends (user info) at 2005-05-12 17:45:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
SHITFUCK IS NOT AN ALTER
HE IS GOD
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-05-12 17:40:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
What's with all the yelling today?
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2005-05-12 17:32:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
IM NOT AN ALTAR YOU FUCK HEAD
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2005-05-12 17:16:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Bart, please kill this alter.
NOW.
Submitted by WiKi (user info) at 2005-05-12 16:38:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Eh.. this kinda thing doesn't really get me riled up.
But. I prefer this stuff: http://www.ubersite.com/m/33096
Haven't talked to you in a while. I could use some talking.
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2005-05-12 16:02:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
IF YOU CAME HERE FROM BOBS POST MAKE SURE TO GIVE THIS TO YOUR MOM FOR ME
....................../´¯/)
....................,/¯../
.................../..../
............./´¯/'...'/´¯¯`·¸
........../'/.../..../......./¨¯\
........('(...´...´.... ¯~/'...')
.........\.................'...../
..........''...\.......... _.·´
............\..............(
..............\.............\...
SUCK ME YOU SILLY LITTLE SLUT YOU
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2005-05-12 15:16:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
SHOULDN'T YOU BE BUSY GETTING BEATEN BY THUGS?
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2005-05-12 15:04:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Oh, more of this. Super.
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2005-05-12 14:47:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
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Submitted by Girlwithaclue (user info) at 2005-05-12 14:29:43 (#)
Ranking: -2
I think that you ass raped your mother and she beat you...
That would explain the shit your spewing out of your cum guzzling mouth!!
Submitted by BobLobla (user info) at 2005-05-12 13:32:22 (#)
Ranking: -2
I bet you get laid alot, what is with all of this neo-chauvanist bullshit on this site, fair enough I make the occasional "make me a sammich" joke, but what the fuck is wrong with you man, this is the kind of bullshit posts that makes good writers leave the site.
"5.) Every girl over the age of 16 deserves a good anal pounding. Even if it's rape"
What in the fuck is your problem, seriously, let me know how this attitue works with the ladies for you.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>.
What ladies, he keeps his sister tied to his bed so he can pretend to have ladies......
YOUR ASSHOLE IS CURIOUSLY LARGE
I AM MORE FAMOUS THAN DILLINGER
YOU FUCK STRAY CATS AND VEGETABLES
I SELL RETARDS ON EBAY
YOU DONT OWN A NICE CAR
I FUCKED YOUR ENTIRE FAMILY
YOU HAVE GREEN NIPPLES
I WOULDNT SUCK THEM FOR A MILLION DOLLARS
YOUR BARBIE DOLL COLLECTION IS LOST SOMEWHERE IN YOUR CUNT
IM NOT GOING TO CLIMB IN AND FIND IT FOR YOU
YOU PISSED YOURSELF AT YOUR GRAD
I GOT DRUNK WITH YOU DAD AND HE TOLD ME HE STILL LIKES TO WIPE YOUR ASS
YOU EAT BUGS
I CREATED THE UNIVERSE
YOU ARE AFRAID OF FLYING
I CAN LEAP LIKE NOBODIES BUSINESS
YOU LIKE TO WATCH INVALIDS DROOL
MY COCK IS SWEETER THAN SUGAR
YOU THINK PEOPLE LIKE YOU FOR YOUR PERSONALITY
I FUCKED YOU IN YOUR SLEEP AND YOU STILL DREAM ABOUT IT
Submitted by DerivableZero (user info) at 2005-05-12 14:33:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
this isn't on most heated yet?
hurry up.
damnit.
Submitted by Girlwithaclue (user info) at 2005-05-12 14:29:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I think that you ass raped your mother and she beat you...
That would explain the shit your spewing out of your cum guzzling mouth!!
Submitted by BobLobla (user info) at 2005-05-12 13:32:22 (#)
Ranking: -2
I bet you get laid alot, what is with all of this neo-chauvanist bullshit on this site, fair enough I make the occasional "make me a sammich" joke, but what the fuck is wrong with you man, this is the kind of bullshit posts that makes good writers leave the site.
"5.) Every girl over the age of 16 deserves a good anal pounding. Even if it's rape"
What in the fuck is your problem, seriously, let me know how this attitue works with the ladies for you.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>.
What ladies, he keeps his sister tied to his bed so he can pretend to have ladies......
Submitted by DerivableZero (user info) at 2005-05-12 14:29:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You're a chauvanistic asshole. I hope you choke on a cock and die.
Just kidding.
Submitted by MANICMOTHER (user info) at 2005-05-12 14:22:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I laughed my ass off. Once again the line on deciency has been lowered because of this place.
<sniff> I'm just so proud to be a part of it.
Submitted by wtf_is_going_on (user info) at 2005-05-12 14:22:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I love this, even though I'm being called a cunt and all.
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2005-05-12 14:12:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I AM THE HOT CARL
YOU ARE A FLATUENT PIG IN A GARDEN OF FLOWERS
I AM A WHORE SLAYER
YOU LICK YOUR MOMS TAMPON COLLECTION
I DRIVE A SLUT MOBILE FULL OF NAKED TEENAGE WHORES
YOU STICK YOUR THUMB IN YOUR ASS AND PRETEND ITS YOUR BEST FRIEND
GOD TOLD ME IM MORE FUN THAN JESUS
YOU STILL SHOWER WITH YOUR DAD
I HAVE 100% MORE RIP
YOU STILL EAT CHEESE STICKS
MY COCK IS AIDS PROOF
YOUR SISTER GAVE YOU THE CLAP
Submitted by kai070169 (user info) at 2005-05-12 14:06:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I remember teh original Hot Carl, king of teh Most heated.
I miss him.
Submitted by kai070169 (user info) at 2005-05-12 14:04:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hot Carl = Auto +2
How ya been, buddy?
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2005-05-12 13:36:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
HEY BOIb I AM THE WRITNG MASTER AND YOU ARE A RETARDED SPERM GUZZLER
RAPE IS A LAUGHING MATTER, BOB SMALL PENIS IS NOT.
Submitted by BobLobla (user info) at 2005-05-12 13:32:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I bet you get laid alot, what is with all of this neo-chauvanist bullshit on this site, fair enough I make the occasional "make me a sammich" joke, but what the fuck is wrong with you man, this is the kind of bullshit posts that makes good writers leave the site.
"5.) Every girl over the age of 16 deserves a good anal pounding. Even if it's rape"
What in the fuck is your problem, seriously, let me know how this attitue works with the ladies for you.
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2005-05-12 13:29:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
CHECK OUT THE USER INFO OLD MAN
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-05-12 13:25:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Who's this newest asshole an alter of?
Submitted by Flack (user info) at 2005-05-12 13:20:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
meh
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2005-05-12 13:14:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Submitted by Draqus (user info) at 2005-05-12 13:13:09 (#)
Ranking: -2
You dig teh ghey buttsecks, rite?
Cos surely that's about all you're getting, with that attitude.
Hot Carl: "Attn ghey menz. I like teh ghey buttsecks."
YEAH I FUCKED YOUR MOM IN THE ASS AND SHE CRIED
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-05-12 13:13:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2005-05-12 12:52:53 (#)
Ranking: 2
yeah sometimes we just need a reminder
-------------------------
call me.
Submitted by Draqus (user info) at 2005-05-12 13:13:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You dig teh ghey buttsecks, rite?
Cos surely that's about all you're getting, with that attitude.
Hot Carl: "Attn ghey menz. I like teh ghey buttsecks."
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2005-05-12 13:09:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
HEY WHORE KEEP YOUR SPERM VACUUM SHUT AND GET ME A BEER BITCH
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2005-05-12 13:08:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
YOU FUCKING AMATEUR! YOU DIDN'T MENTION TASERS OR CAR BATTERIES AND JUMPER CABLES! ELECTRIC SHOCK IS MORE EFFECTIVE THAN BEATINGS.
BTW, I'VE FORWARDED THIS TO ALL FEMINIST PROFESSORS ON MY CAMPUS.
YOU'RE IN DEEP SHIT NOW!
Submitted by clumeister (user info) at 2005-05-12 13:05:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
This reads like a manifesto of vile hate...
I like it :)
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2005-05-12 13:04:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
HEY FATBOY PULL YOUR MOMS TAMPON OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND -2 THIS BITCH YOU PUSSY ASS
Submitted by funk_boy (user info) at 2005-05-12 12:58:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
what no ligers?
Submitted by SiskelandFatboy (user info) at 2005-05-12 12:57:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
"If the need arises, only give her one bucket."
This was really headed for negative two-ville until I came across this line.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2005-05-12 12:52:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
yeah sometimes we just need a reminder
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2005-05-12 12:51:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
RAPE IS A LUGHING MATTER, BANNING IS NOT.
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2005-05-12 12:50:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
THE GOOD OLD DAYS OF UBER SHALL RETURN WITH A VENGENCE!!!!!
Submitted by Feijuada (user info) at 2005-05-12 12:47:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I WASTHE FIRST PERSON ON THIS POST TO COMMENT IN CAPS
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-05-12 12:46:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This is how I feel inside.
Submitted by vodka7tall (user info) at 2005-05-12 12:45:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This was great.
Submitted by dwr_budr (user info) at 2005-05-12 12:45:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I JUST WANTED TO POST SOMETHING IN CAPS, IT SEEMS LIKE THE THING TO DO.
I DIDN'T READ THE POST THOUGH, JUST LOOKED AT THE PICTURE. SORRY.
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2005-05-12 12:42:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm reading this post out loud with my lighter held high in the air, swaying back and forth.
PEOPLE ARE STARING
WOMEN ARE GYRATING
Submitted by Feijuada (user info) at 2005-05-12 12:42:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This post rocks hard.
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2005-05-12 12:37:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
AND WHAT THE FUCK IS WITH ALPHA TWENTY COCKGOBNLING INITIATIVE YOU FUCKING GOOF?
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-05-12 12:36:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
why are you being a dick?
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2005-05-12 12:36:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
HEY LOKI DONT BLAME ME FOR THE FACT YOUR ASS FLOPS ON THE FLOOR WHEN YOU SQUAT TO TAKE A PISS
Submitted by ICO (user info) at 2005-05-12 12:35:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Morlock (user info) at 2005-05-12 12:18:25 (#)
Ranking: -2
Hrmmm. Horrid attempt at most heated.
__________
Initiating concurring mode Alfa-Twenty.
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2005-05-12 12:35:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
attn ghey menz
Submitted by hairjr (user info) at 2005-05-12 12:32:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
meh.. needs more points..
Submitted by Feijuada (user info) at 2005-05-12 12:27:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/58097
"Backhanding usually works, but sometimes a belt is required, due to a will. Try to break it with the buckle."
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2005-05-12 12:25:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
HEY CORN KEEP THAT MOUTH SHUT UNLESS YOURE OPENING IT TO ENGULF SOME COCK
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2005-05-12 12:24:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I heard you had big tits.
Submitted by TheSpook (user info) at 2005-05-12 12:23:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This is good.
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2005-05-12 12:22:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
BOW DOWN TO MY MOTHERFUCKING AWESOMNESS BITCHES111111 ONE ONE ! 2@@ !!!
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2005-05-12 12:20:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
bwahahahahahaah
HOT CARL IS BACK, BITCHES!
Submitted by Lets_B_Friends (user info) at 2005-05-12 12:20:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I miss SausageKing.
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2005-05-12 12:19:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!
This is so bad that it's good.
Submitted by jumpinjellyfish (user info) at 2005-05-12 12:19:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Logically then, your mother is a whore?
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2005-05-12 12:18:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Morlock (user info) at 2005-05-12 12:18:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Hrmmm. Horrid attempt at most heated.
Submitted by Feijuada (user info) at 2005-05-12 12:18:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
THIS IS AMAZING
Submitted by MichaelJackson (user info) at 2005-05-12 12:18:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
That woman has a hairy back