An UberInterview: Matt Maiorano (795 hits)
Category: GeneralRating: 0.28 on 29 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Kazzerax (View user info) at 2005-05-23 20:50:59 EDT
ZakTheFlame: Alright, How does it feel to be 11 on the MVA, but people know more about Schlongy than you?
maiorano84: Doesn't bother me too much. I kind of admire Shlongy for all of the work he puts into getting people riled up. A lot of people have tried to create alters doing exactly that, myself included, and not many of them were very successful. I like the fact that I'm recognized in my own way, even if I'm not as noticeable as Shlongy.
ZakTheFlame: I see. On another note, what the fuck were you thinking when you came to Ubersite?
maiorano84: That's a damn good question. Looking back at all of those really crappy posts, I'm not sure what I was thinking either. When I first saw Jonukah's famous "If I Cum Now....." post, I figured it'd be fun to write here. Then I started trying to be like Maddox, and then people hated me...... I have no idea how I managed to survive.
ZakTheFlame: Me either. Where do you get the ideas for your posts?
maiorano84: Really, a lot of my humor posts are completely fabricated. A lot of them usually involve the question, "Wouldn't it be funny if....." and then I just make up a story about a true situation. Then, there are the various contests, series, and serious short stories...... I'm not entirely sure where they come from. Most of them usually stem from questions I ask myself as a human being. I've always liked making people reflect on themselves, by exposing my own shortcomings as a human being.
ZakTheFlame: So, when did you come into your smartass gene?
maiorano84: about last week
maiorano84: total rush
ZakTheFlame: thought so.
ZakTheFlame: Now, on a serious note, are you into the peener?
maiorano84: hells no
maiorano84: I'm totally into breasts
ZakTheFlame: Suuuuuuuuure.
ZakTheFlame: What is your favorite post of all time?
maiorano84: oh wow
maiorano84: my favorite post of all time?
ZakTheFlame: Yes.
maiorano84: that's pretty tough to say, really.....
ZakTheFlame: Not any of yours either.
maiorano84: I gathered
maiorano84: hmmmmm.......
ZakTheFlame: Let me make it easier.
ZakTheFlame: Your favorite humorous post.
maiorano84: there are a lot that I've laughed out loud at
ZakTheFlame: With content.
ZakTheFlame: No stupid photoshops of a fat kid naked, etc.
maiorano84: but I think the most memorable for me is Jonukah's "If I Cum Now....." post. That was the one that got me to join in the first place. It can't get any more memorable than that.
ZakTheFlame: But your favorite.
maiorano84: yeah
maiorano84: read above
ZakTheFlame: Besides that,
maiorano84: .......
maiorano84: ooookay, probably Donkey's post that had the quote, "At least I don't look like a bucket of smashed assholes." That had me laughing for about a week.
ZakTheFlame: Alright, fair enough,
ZakTheFlame: Who is your favorite overall author?
maiorano84: In all honesty, I don't read enough on Uber to have a 'favorite' per say. There are a bunch that I like, but it's kinda like music: I don't go for the bands, I go for the songs. I don't go for the author, I got for the post. WhatTheHell had a good one recently, Jonukah is the guy who got me started, Donkey is hilarious, GLALL is a complete nutjob..... there's just too many for me to say. I'll have to go with Donkey and Jonukah, and there's no changing my mind.
ZakTheFlame: What, no Kazzerax? Fucking douche! (That's me by the way.)
maiorano84: Eh, you've had a few good ones..... just none that I remember
ZakTheFlame: Oh, nice.
ZakTheFlame: Not even the one where you raped Jared?
ZakTheFlame: How the fuck do you not remember that?
maiorano84: wasn't that the one that I wrote?
ZakTheFlame: Yes.
maiorano84: heh......
ZakTheFlame: You know what I mean.
maiorano84: Yeah, that was the best one you had
ZakTheFlame: I gave the inspiration.
ZakTheFlame: Oh, except for my Live and Let Die post.
ZakTheFlame: Donkey posted that on some random website Degreeless showed me, I copied it, changed the title, and it seemed like a relationship post, but I photoshopped a picture of Bush's ugly mug then an = sign, and a broken heart.
maiorano84: yeah, that one is pretty good
ZakTheFlame: hahahah
ZakTheFlame: The irony, is that donkey plus 2ed it I beleive.
ZakTheFlame: Now, this is the one that every Uber user ever who has read one of your posts wants to know
ZakTheFlame: How long is your peener?
maiorano84: Anywhere between 1 and 36 inches
ZakTheFlame: I see.
ZakTheFlame: Between 1 and 15?
maiorano84: I am not at liberty to speak about my peener.
ZakTheFlame: Anyway.
ZakTheFlame: Anything you want the rest of Uber to know?
maiorano84: I don't really have any mindblowing words to say that haven't been said before. All I'll say right now is this: Never deny yourself. I see it all too often, and I've been one to do it too. No good ever comes from lying to yourself about yourself. That, and don't eat the brown M&M's that look as if they're missing their shell. Those aren't M&M's.
ZakTheFlame: hahah
ZakTheFlame: say Hi mom or something
maiorano84: no
maiorano84 signed off at 7:14:40 PM.
User Reviews
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2005-05-23 23:33:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/66932
Submitted by Dripping_Abscess (user info) at 2005-05-23 23:01:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
who teh fuck is that fagggot???????????????>
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-05-23 22:46:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
He looks stoned in the picture
Submitted by DJMattB241 (user info) at 2005-05-23 22:45:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
link whore!
http://www.ubersite.com/m/66883
Submitted by Kazzerax (user info) at 2005-05-23 22:43:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
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Submitted by Lunch_Pail (user info) at 2005-05-23 22:41:02 (#)
Ranking: 0
hmmm. zacktheflame, questions about peeners, you do the math.
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ZAK ZAK MOTHERFUCKER, IT'S ALL THROUGH THE POST GOD DAMN IT'S ZAK
Submitted by DJMattB241 (user info) at 2005-05-23 22:41:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i hope to be famous enough for an uber-interview some day...
Submitted by Lunch_Pail (user info) at 2005-05-23 22:41:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
hmmm. zacktheflame, questions about peeners, you do the math.
Submitted by knucklesnelson (user info) at 2005-05-23 22:37:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
No Comment
Submitted by Wallstreet (user info) at 2005-05-23 22:27:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Interviews are the suxxor
Submitted by Lechuga (user info) at 2005-05-23 22:22:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Dude, that was pretty boring, although Matt's responses were good.
Submitted by BillsSBChamps (user info) at 2005-05-23 22:13:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
this was some hard hitting reporting.
Submitted by JMG114 (user info) at 2005-05-23 22:12:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Seriously. I had no idea. I had a sneaking suspicion, but I never knew for sure. Makes sense, I suppose.
Submitted by JMG114 (user info) at 2005-05-23 22:10:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ZakTheFlame: Not even the one where you raped Jared?
ZakTheFlame: How the fuck do you not remember that?
Matt, that was you??? I never KNEW that! OMGWTFBBQROFLLOLSAURUSCOPTER!!!!!!!!!
Submitted by maiorano84 (user info) at 2005-05-23 22:05:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It's meeeeee!
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-05-23 22:01:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Let me clarify.
The interview itself isn't funny as hell...the idea OF the interview is the funny part.
I like the idea. I wish I had thought of it.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-05-23 21:57:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This is funny as hell.
It didn't hurt that you smartly started the interview with a real attention grabber and sizzling hot topic - me.
Now that's smart writing. Have a +2.
Submitted by mikethescottish (user info) at 2005-05-23 21:30:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I, uh... well, hmm...
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2005-05-23 21:29:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Corn Nugget is a bitch!
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2005-05-23 21:23:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
stupid, on many levels.
Oh, boring, too.
Submitted by brokenlizard534 (user info) at 2005-05-23 21:13:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i dont know.
too long.
Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2005-05-23 21:08:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
aim chats rock so much
Submitted by MickGinny (user info) at 2005-05-23 21:05:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
yep, just as i thought, matt is gay.
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2005-05-23 21:04:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
hahaha
You're fired.
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2005-05-23 21:02:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Seriously, the least you could have done is formatted this so it looked like there was some effort put into it instead of just copying and pasting.
Submitted by MyNameIsTim (user info) at 2005-05-23 21:01:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2005-05-23 21:00:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You could sell this to a magazine.
Submitted by Kazzerax (user info) at 2005-05-23 20:59:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Shut the fuck up. Thank you.
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2005-05-23 20:56:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Don't ever go into journalism.
Submitted by bush_for_god (user info) at 2005-05-23 20:51:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment