Koreans make the best cars (505 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 2 on 5 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by <rurumon> (View user info) at 2005-05-24 11:33:02 EDT
Inspired by http://www.ubersite.com/m/66971 I thought I would let Haggard know how good he's got it.
I am not going to pretend to be tolerant, because we all have our prejudices..however small they are. have an awful prejudice against women drivers because they have tried to kill me. I could get cliche here and say that its due to the fact that they are powerless in their loveless WASP marriages and thus they drive their 'burbans at buck twenty on the beltway, but I think its really a problem with road signs. Of my three accidents with the finer sex in the last 18 months, all three have resulted in ignoring such simple four and five letter commands like yield or stop. And women say men have a problem when they tell them to stop, I submit that they need to further examine the particulars of that very definition!
The final installation was even more enraging.
Im driving on Duke st. east about to turn onto the service road to go up to my house. As you are not aware, the inlet onto the service road has no yield or stop for my direction of conveyance, I can go as I please. On the service road, there is a stop sign going both ways. Now, I've lived here for 23 years, and I know people never obey those stop signs. They run them and force me to come to screeching halt daily because they are mouth-breathers who think stop signs dont apply to them. Just like the two red lights at the bottom of that hill 50 feet apart. They think the first one is a suggestion for the real thing, the second one.
Regardless, traffic was really snarled, and there was a line on the service road going west towards the intersection at the bottom. No matter, since the traffic had provided me with a gap in order to enter the service road. What I was not expecting as I traveled through that gap at 25 miles to the hour, was some dumb shit oxygen wasting bitch on the WRONG side of the road RUNNING the stop sign because she was too impatient and fucking STUPID to wait in line. I smashed her shit good sasquatch style. After I ruined her rav4 with the neon fury, she just fucking sits in the car. Doesnt get out to see if I am ok, doesnt fucking examine my car or her car for that matter. She just sits there with this stupid fucking look on her face that doesnt even hint of chagrin. Now, call me crazy...but when you almost injure someone because of your own lack of fucking synapses, you at least check to see if they are ok...because now would be when I would start faking a neck injury if you were an asshole about it.
But I didnt, because Im not a fraud. Anyway, I was lucky enough to have not only a traffic cop, but a sheriff fucking get eyewitness front row seats to her shit driving. She got a wreckless ticket, and I got a Kia Optima for a couple weeks.
Seriously, a fucking Kia? Quit whining about a the ford taurus! My srt-4, l33t3st haxx0r in the world and teh fastest car evar = kia optima? the optima only has 3 speeds! both transmission and intermittent wiper blades...seriously, this car made me uncomfortable before I even opened the door, not to mention it has 75 horsepower, and this little light on the dash continually informs me that the passenger side airbag has been disabled.
dont drive in alexandria.
User Reviews
Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2005-05-24 21:40:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 because I thought you were serious and I was ready to bash the matchbox Kia.
If I wanted a $9000 piece of shit I'd start eating gold coins.
Submitted by Hadooken (user info) at 2005-05-24 12:10:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
my sled still pwns all...
http://www.ubersite.com/m/57943
Submitted by AwesomeJohnson (user info) at 2005-05-24 11:44:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i like my japano-car assembled somewhere in middle america.
go AWD wooooooooo!
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2005-05-24 11:39:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I pity you for having to drive around DC
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2005-05-24 11:38:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
See!
Even he knows!
Kias suck more ass than, well... anything, really!