Ashlee's run-in with the law: Because I got high (1424 hits)
Category: GeneralRating: 1 on 47 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Ashlee (View user info) at 2005-05-31 15:44:30 EDT
My whole life, I've always been a "good girl." Even when I began to venture into less wholesome territory, I did so very discreetly. My dirty little secrets are well-kept from any type of authority. I've never been in any serious trouble, and certainly have never even come CLOSE to getting arrested.
I could truthfully say all that early last month.
It began in the early evening of Friday the 13th. The date alone sparked a bit of superstitious paranoia in myself and my best friend (we'll call her Michelle), but the promise of a kickass party and the aroma of some of the best weed I've seen since that month in Key West quickly chased all reluctance from our minds. And so, without dismal scenarios plaguing our thoughts, we headed out into the night.
The first stop was downtown, to a longtime friend's house. Turns out, we weren't the only ones who shared that idea, and there was quite a little get-together happening. We chatted for a bit before one of the people we knew best asked if we'd like to ride to the store with him, his brother, and his best friend. This is, among our inner circle, code for "We're about to spark up, but there's too many heads here. You in?"
Five of us piled into the car, and we started the ride around the neighborhood. A total of three blunts were passed around. When we neared the store, Michelle asked the driver to stop so she could pick up a drink for the two of us. She ran inside the store, exiting minutes later with a quart of Raspberry Smirnoff Twisted IX in hand, which the two of us would share throughout the night.
When we returned, the party was winding down, so Michelle and I decided to move on to the next. There had been talk all day of a bonfire held out in the back roads near my home, and in our little po-dunk shithole town, when there's a bonfire, EVERYBODY shows up and good times are had. We climbed back into my car and headed that way.
Now, at this point, I was a little tipsy and a lot stoned, so I took back streets the entire way, not wanting to get on a road where I might put someone in danger. It may be time-consuming to drive across town at 25 MPH on dirt roads, but that's just the price I had to pay for getting fucked up before I reached my final destination.
So there we are, creeping along, nearing the spot where the bonfire is meant to be held, when, in the distance, I see a set of headlights. One set. Problem. I suddenly feel my heart in my throat as I turn to Michelle. "There's only one set of lights up there. That's a cop." She rolls her eyes at my worry, replying "No, it's not! We're just early. Keep driving." Michelle's been at this a while longer than me, and I trust her judgment, so on we went. We cut the distance between us and the other car in half before we could clearly see that it was, in fact, a police car.
We were well aware of the fact that it was too late to turn around, and there was no way we could toss anything without the cop seeing. So, simultaneously, the blue lights came on, my foot hit the break, and my life flashed before my eyes.
I rolled down my window as the officer was walking up. He asked for our driver's licenses. I handed mine over, and Michelle, whose license was lost a few days prior, recited her driver's license number for him to write down. He radioed in the numbers, then asked me why my eyes were red. I told him that I had been wearing my contacts all day and they were beginning to dry out and bother my eyes. I thanked God that I actually DO wear contacts as he leaned in to look for the telltale circle around my iris.
He asked if there was any alcohol in the car. Michelle quickly answered "No," as I imperceptibly shook my head, knowing full well that he had already seen the near-empty bottle sitting between her feet.
My heart was pounding, and only sped up when he asked me to step out of the car. A quick mental rundown of all the things that were about to be on my rap sheet did unsurprisingly little to calm me; expired temp tag, DUI, open bottle, underage drinking, possession, paraphernalia... Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck I'm going to jail tonight.
I turned all my focus towards putting forth an appearance of sobriety when we reached the back of my car. The policeman looked me in the eye and began with "Now, be honest with me. How much have you had to drink?" I told him the truth, that I had had a few drinks from the quart he'd seen in the car. He asked me if I was aware that the legal blood alcohol level that someone my age could have while driving was .02. I told him I was. He then ran through a few of the tests. First, I had to follow a red light with only my eyes. Next up, counting from 1001 to 1030 with one foot six inches from the ground and my hands at my sides. Finally, the good ol' walking the line.
The first and last of the tests I managed pretty well on, but during the second I was shaking and wobbling and I knew it. I almost cried with relief when he led me back to the driver's seat of my car and handed me my license. It was over. I made it through and I was outta there.
Only not. He made his way around the car, over to Michelle's side. He asked her how old she was (although he already knew; I heard the dispatcher tell him over the radio.), she told him she'd be twenty-one in July. He told her that he could take us both to jail right then. She said she knew that. I was busy using every spare ounce of self-control to stop myself from banging my head against the steering wheel when he began to let on that he wasn't going to take us in. "Tell you what," he said. "I'm just gonna let you pour the rest of that drink out right now, ok?" Michelle complied, and my heart finally began to slow to a healthy pace.
And then. Oh, Lord, and then. With the police officer standing right outside her car door, Michelle proceeds to toss the bottle out the window and into the grass. "I know you didn't just throw that out in front of me," from the man with the cuffs. Being a nice guy, he allowed her to pick up the bottle and put it in the trunk.
As we stood outside the car, he told us that he wasn't going to keep us out there all night. I listened in half-disbelief as he told us that he'd been our age not too long ago and he knew what it was like. The best thing you can do, he joked, is not get caught.
At this point, I'm ready to hug this guy and cry all at once. Michelle, on the other hand, had different ideas. The cop was nearing the end of his lecture, I was listening intently and nodding in agreement, when Michelle's voice broke through. "But what are you supposed to do if you're at one party and you want to go to a different one?" I was too shocked to hear what he said next, but her retort rang in my ears. "There's nothing else to DO around here!"
I'm looking at her, just praying to God she'll shut up. I mean, this guy is telling us he's about to let us go, and she's standing there fucking ARGUING with him. Finally, when she just keeps on, I inch closer to her and kick her, hoping that it's dark enough that he doesn't notice. Almost miraculously, it works, and she shuts up. "You're right, sir. I'm sorry. Michelle, I think it's time we just went home," from me. Hey, I may have done a bit of ass-kissing, but he WAS right, and I sure as hell didn't want to spend the night in jail. "That sounds like a good idea. You ladies have a safe night, ok?" was his reply as he climbed back into his own vehicle.
Only after he pulled away did I move back towards the driver's seat of my car. I sank in, visibly shaking. Michelle's door closed and I started the engine. When I pulled out onto the main road, she stunned me once again with "so where do you want to go now? I hear there's a party out at the Estates..."
"Fuck your party. I'm going home."
User Reviews
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2005-08-07 01:06:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2005-05-31 15:52:28 (#)
Ranking: 2
That cop was wrong.
Michelle will end up learning her lesson the hard way, since that cop was too easy on her.
I had to bail her out of jail last night. You should start your own psychic hotline.
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2005-06-18 03:44:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You're a dirty little cockwhore, aren't you?
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2005-06-01 14:42:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Shit wrong link below, THIS is my similar experience: http://www.ubersite.com/m/39762
Submitted by Kaelic (user info) at 2005-06-01 10:14:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
The closest I ever came to a DUI was a very astute officer who said I was driving to closer to the curb, and he made me get out, shined his light in my eyes, and made me balance. Not bragging, I had probably drank about 15 beers by myself, and the next day turned out to be one of the worst hangovers ever, so how I managed to not get a DUI I don't know. When he asked me what I was up doing so late, I said I had just come back from pulling an all night study session.
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2005-06-01 09:54:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Shoot a brotha an email....I can't stay awake....
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2005-06-01 09:46:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I STILL can't get AIM working, if it makes you feel anybetter....
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2005-06-01 09:45:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Hahahah sorry about that. My AIM fucked up, and while I was trying to fix it, the love of my life called and I JUST got off the phone.
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2005-06-01 09:37:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The horrible thing was disappearing so I fell asleep in my chair last night.....
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2005-06-01 09:20:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
How is it unbeleivable?
I really want to know why people are getting mad at me over this. Shit, maybe he DID let me go because I was a pretty young girl in a sexy outfit. Well, that's not my goddamn fault, now is it? Yeah, I was going out, so I wanted to look nice. I didn't plan to get pulled over. It was the farthest thing from my mind. I didn't flirt with him - at all. Fuck, I was so scared I could barely remember my own name, let alone run game on a cop. Whatever the reason he decided to let me go, he did so of his own volition. I had no direct or intenional influence on it whatsoever. Christ Almighty. Yeah, I got lucky. I REALIZE that, and I'm more than grateful for it. I fucked up, I learned from my mistake, and I didn't have to go to jail to do so - why is that such a horrible fucking thing?
Submitted by TheSpook (user info) at 2005-06-01 09:13:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Wow. Way to get out of it because you have tits.
Unbelieveable.
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2005-06-01 08:58:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
My similar experience: http://www.ubersite.com/m/37171
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-06-01 08:41:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You apparently married a complete genius.
Submitted by missflibble (user info) at 2005-06-01 08:27:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
my other half got pulled over recently for speeding. aparently 103 in a 70 zone. dick. What makes him more of a dick is, knowing the officer would probably get me to corroborate his story, the tit head gave a false name. but the false name he used was John Cole, two of the most common names in the british isles.
obviously the officer came and asked me what my hubby's name is. not knowing the twat had said "john Cole " I gave his full real names. all four of them.
He's still not had the formal paperwork.
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2005-06-01 07:56:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2005-05-31 15:52:28 (#)
Ranking: 2
That cop was wrong.
Michelle will end up learning her lesson the hard way, since that cop was too easy on her.
*********************************************
Post was well written. Hope the experience made you grow up a little.
When teenagers complain that 'there's nothing else to DO' in a small town except get drunk or get high, I wonder, what is it they wish they COULD be doing in a bigger town? Go to a play? Hang out at a jazz club? Take midnight Spanish classes? I don't buy that excuse.
Submitted by Twiddle (user info) at 2005-06-01 04:41:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I was gonna read this post but then i got high
ps no shit i smoked weed with afroman in hattiesburg ms Ill post the story later of turmoil and tragedy of smoking with a one hit wonder
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-06-01 03:51:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I did coke with some cops once.
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2005-06-01 00:08:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by VoRn (user info) at 2005-05-31 23:56:12 (#)
Ranking: 0
"Now, at this point, I was a little tipsy and a lot stoned, so I took back streets the entire way, not wanting to get on a road where I might put someone in danger."
Translation: I took the back streets so I wouldn't get caught.
________
Actually, I am VERY careful when driving in populated areas. Two friends of mine were killed by a drunk driver a couple years ago, and I would NEVER be able to forgive myself if I caused something like that. I knew I was fucked up, so I took backroads because nobody ever takes them. The chances of getting caught are - obviously - a lot higher on the backroads than they are on the highway where I live.
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-06-01 00:00:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
a little tipsy and a lot stoned
woo hoo!
Submitted by VoRn (user info) at 2005-05-31 23:56:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"Now, at this point, I was a little tipsy and a lot stoned, so I took back streets the entire way, not wanting to get on a road where I might put someone in danger."
Translation: I took the back streets so I wouldn't get caught.
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2005-05-31 23:51:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2005-05-31 23:42:08 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Totally_useless (user info) at 2005-05-31 15:53:45 (#)
Ranking: -1
Fuck discrimination.
You got off the hook because you have tits, and you know it.
I wish I had tits so I could avoid getting.........oh wait.....I do.
Nevermind.
bahahahaha
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2005-05-31 23:42:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Totally_useless (user info) at 2005-05-31 15:53:45 (#)
Ranking: -1
Fuck discrimination.
You got off the hook because you have tits, and you know it.
I wish I had tits so I could avoid getting.........oh wait.....I do.
Nevermind.
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2005-05-31 23:26:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for linkwhoring me here.
Submitted by maiorano84 (user info) at 2005-05-31 23:13:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Yay.
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2005-05-31 23:04:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Strider- Who am I, really? No, I want to know. A teenage girl who fucked up? WOW, that's horrible. Jail me and throw away the key. And as for the kinds of people I hang around with... well, you know very little about them other than one of them gets stupid when she gets drunk. Just like everyone else in the world. Go on now, tell me, you never made a mistake, ever, right?
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-05-31 19:43:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
can you taste the self-rightousness?
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-05-31 19:24:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for this.
A glimmer of responsibility through that mess of a life.
Working in corrections, it absolutley gets me off to see someone actually learn from their mistakes.
Assuming you quit the weed and drinking and cleaned yourself up a bit.
Submitted by strider (user info) at 2005-05-31 18:13:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Sounds about right for you. Not sure that it was Worth reading (+0) other than reaffirming to everyone who you really are and the kinds of people you hang around with.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-05-31 17:56:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Grab onto my root and tug like crazy, woman.
Submitted by joedaddy (user info) at 2005-05-31 16:37:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
This post demands a response from me.
I will take the time to properly craft one, and return this evening.
<joedaddy>
Submitted by yermom (user info) at 2005-05-31 16:33:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
not horrible +1
Submitted by DanielH (user info) at 2005-05-31 16:31:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
My whole life, I've always been a "good girl."
- - -
I bet I could change that.
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2005-05-31 16:29:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Stick it to the man.
Submitted by dwr_budr (user info) at 2005-05-31 16:11:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Your friend is kind of a dumbass.
Not as big a dumbass as fuckwit down there, though.
Submitted by HadToBeDone (user info) at 2005-05-31 16:10:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2005-05-31 15:57:18 (#)
Ranking: 0
Honestly, I don't think it had anything to do with me being a girl. We were out in the middle of the woods, because I knew I couldn't drive on the main roads in my state, and I told him as much. I think that he was maybe just a nice guy.
----------------
That's a joke, right? You think 2 guys riding around in that condition and doing the same things would get off? Shit, that is naive, girl....
2 under-21 guys would have been spending the night in jail after the cop saw an open container in the vehicle.
But +1 for the story.
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2005-05-31 16:08:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Ashlee, yes of course. I've been in similar situations, just barely got out of trouble... and I felt the same relief. It seems that you are bright enough to have learned a lesson from this, even though you got off easy. Michelle does not seem equally bright.
Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-05-31 16:08:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
+1 for keeping my focus the entire time
-1 for getting out of a ticket that I FOR SURE would have gotten
+1 for the blow job you gave the cop that you omited from your story
Submitted by Deidra (user info) at 2005-05-31 16:01:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2005-05-31 15:58:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2005-05-31 15:52:28 (#)
Ranking: 2
That cop was wrong.
Michelle will end up learning her lesson the hard way, since that cop was too easy on her.
God damn kids. God damn it all.
Maybe so, maybe so, but -I- didn't get arrested, and that gives me a happy.
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2005-05-31 15:57:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Totally_useless (user info) at 2005-05-31 15:53:45 (#)
Ranking: -1
Fuck discrimination.
You got off the hook because you have tits, and you know it.
So is this -1 because it's a bad story, or because I got a break? Honestly, I don't think it had anything to do with me being a girl. We were out in the middle of the woods, because I knew I couldn't drive on the main roads in my state, and I told him as much. I think that he was maybe just a nice guy.
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2005-05-31 15:54:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
He's just mad because I told him he was worthless the other day. You know what happens when you say something someone doesn't like around here anymore.
Submitted by Totally_useless (user info) at 2005-05-31 15:53:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Fuck discrimination.
You got off the hook because you have tits, and you know it.
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2005-05-31 15:53:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
How is this post too long? Fucking christ, people. Get an attention span, why don't you?
Submitted by ICO (user info) at 2005-05-31 15:52:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't think it's too big. I would've given you a +1 for an OK story, but I had to counter that stupid remark.
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2005-05-31 15:52:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That cop was wrong.
Michelle will end up learning her lesson the hard way, since that cop was too easy on her.
God damn kids. God damn it all.
Submitted by PokeyPecker (user info) at 2005-05-31 15:52:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Between your yellow teeth, your white-trash episodes with your ex-husband, and THIS, I think I want you to have my babies.
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2005-05-31 15:48:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Sorry bout that. I'll be adding a "retard's edition - now with much smaller words" in the future, so your kind can comprehend the things I post.
Submitted by Feijuada (user info) at 2005-05-31 15:46:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Too big. Summarize it.