UberBadness - William Q. Pussy: Man's Man. (671 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.43 on 9 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by itchy (View user info) at 2005-05-31 16:17:36 EDT
I must confess that I was a little taken aback when I saw the UberBadness brackets. Some asshole had matched me up against the notorious William Q. Pussy. I'd never heard of the guy before, but after checking out the unofficial UberBadness sign-up page, I saw that the little crotch-goblin had actually requested the match-up.
I really intended to do some research on the guy in order to figure out who the hell he was and then find some way to mock and belittle him into submission. As it turns out, I didn't have to. He did it all for me.
See, "Q" as I guess he's called, went and posted this little gem:
8==m==D~~~~~ 0-;} <--- Itchy (UberBadness Round 1)
http://www.ubersite.com/m/67423
He CLAIMS that the post is supposed to be a take-off of the old "suck my dick, you fag" gag. But in reality, it is clearly an invitation to gag whilst sucking MY dick.
I mean, come on. Reading the post you can tell that A LOT of thought went into it. A LOT of thought. There are little details and nuances in there that don't just happen by accident.
The descriptions of "Q's" and my little rendezvous are clearly the result of some tried and true mental jerk-off material.
Let's look at the facts:
"Q" requested the match-up.
Then he posted THAT monstrosity of a "hate-post." Even the few people who thought the festering pile of homo-erotic crap was worth rating noted that it was less of a hate-post and more of a "itchy, please fuck me up the ass without lube - I like it rough" letter.
OMG! He's a fag! Not that there's anything wrong with that.
Well, that's not necessarily the case. There IS something wrong with it if you are going to BE a complete fag, and then attempt to deny it. But that seems to be this guy's M.O..
I went ahead and DID do some research on the guy, and let's look at what we have:
A Simple Request for Miss J.K. Rowling - http://www.ubersite.com/m/63102.
Here, "Q" makes the request that Miss Rowling, the creator of the "Harry Potter" book series "marry" him. He pretends that he's in it for the money, but once the doors of perception are cleansed you can see the real motivations here:
1) He needs a cover. Marrying an actual woman will throw off the dogs - keep people from noticing his FLAMING homosexuality at least a little bit longer. I think they call that a "beard" Will. I saw that on Will and Grace once.
2) The creator of the Harry Potter book series. Gay. Gay. Gay. Seriously.
Then we've got this one, "Making Fluid Dynamics Useful: Cumshot 101 for Hidden101 (NSFW)" - http://www.ubersite.com/m/54326.
A user's guide to make your ejaculation more impressive? What straight guy would even THINK of this? Why not go the next step and write a little something about the "anal G-spot" there Will? What's holding you back? Hmmmm?
Or how about, "BikerFox - Yet Another Man Forcing Me to Question My Sexuality" http://www.ubersite.com/m/51178.
"Q" if that title is accurate, the ONLY person left questioning your sexuality is YOU my friend. Embrace it. Buy yourself a nice rainbow flag. Let yourself go and get some decorative pillows for the couch.
So yeah, this isn't so much a hate-post as it is a pity-post, and probably a "moment of clarity"-post for poor little repressed Willy, but there you go.
I'm sorry you had to learn about it like this, Will, you cock-gobbling little mo.
User Reviews
Submitted by BobLobla (user info) at 2005-05-31 21:11:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Not ONLY that, you cheap fuck, but my doctor says I probably caught something from you too . . . I'd never heard of it before, but it sounds bad. "Canadian" I think he called it.
--------------------------
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2005-05-31 18:43:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
YES!
Submitted by itchy (user info) at 2005-05-31 18:35:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No William, what I'm pissed about, as I alluded on your post, is that you didn't PAY ME LIKE YOU PROMISED. Gender reassignment surgery doesn't just pay for itself, you know.
Not ONLY that, you cheap fuck, but my doctor says I probably caught something from you too . . . I'd never heard of it before, but it sounds bad. "Canadian" I think he called it.
He's not sure if there is a cure.
Submitted by William_Q_Percy (user info) at 2005-05-31 18:11:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You're just mad that I didn't hold you after you sucked me off, fag.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-05-31 17:56:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Funnier than shit, bud.
Submitted by BobLobla (user info) at 2005-05-31 17:38:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
AHAHAHAHA +2 for the pic
Submitted by dodahdave (user info) at 2005-05-31 17:03:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"I likea to sucka teh Quock."
GOLD!
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2005-05-31 16:28:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
When an alter comes out of retirement to hand you your ass, it's time to throw in the towel.
Submitted by Deidra (user info) at 2005-05-31 16:23:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
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