Battle cry of the fairer sex (2965 hits)
Category: NoneLabels: crap:humour
Rating: 1.38 on 115 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Circe <fickle.muse.at.gmail.com> (View user info) at 2005-06-27 12:42:23 EDT
Women:
It's time. We've been knuckled under by these rampant, penis laden barbarians for far too long. The time has come to take back our power, to take back the female strength that got humanity through the first few thousand years of existence. You think the lunkheads that went out and slaughtered the odd mammal were the driving force behind civilization? Hell, no. They would have been quite happy bathing in stagnant mud and living in the rotting corpses of their food.
We drove them onward. We demanded living space, curtains, warmth and shelter; somewhere to pop out the babies that mysteriously kept appearing because the brutish menfolk insisted on shoving themselves into our slippery bits and thrusting back and forth. We got humanity where it is today. Were it not for us, we'd still be roaming the plains, whimpering at the sight of large tusked animals.
We hold the key to humanity's continued existence. Somewhere along the way, the Penes decided that they, with their clublike phalluses, were somehow entitled to be the ones in charge - probably because they were afraid of us. And we LET them. And look at what's happened - death, war, famine, confusion. They screwed it up, and it falls to us, the "fairer" sex, to sort out their mess.
The time has come. The time is NOW. Take it off them. Take away their hormone fuelled lust for power and put them in cages where they belong. We'll oil them up and ride them like horses, because the only advantage they have over us is physical strength - much like any other pack animal. Treat them like the beasts they are, breed with them when we need to, and let's run this world the way it should be run.
Take up arms, Women. Stand up straight and proud and scream your defiance into the faces of those hairy brutes that would oppose us, oppress us, and keep us down.
Every day our numbers grow. We'll attack at night, when they will not expect it. The date will be announced - join us, the People for a Matriarchal Society (PMS) and we'll make this world a better place.
User Reviews
Submitted by mrwolf (user info) at 2005-07-04 09:41:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This started almost as much stupidity as my "I hate americans and stuff". Irony anyone?
Submitted by transhuman (user info) at 2005-06-30 23:03:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2005-06-27 12:56:02 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-06-27 12:53:10 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Yams (user info) at 2005-06-27 12:50:03 (#)
Ranking: 0
Again with the "females are superior?" I hope this is a joke. If so, I don't get the humor. Either way, I'll hit this shit with a zero.
____________
Of course it's a joke. Type "women" into the search bar and see the hysterical misogynistic crap that comes up.
This is what they call "balance."
-------------
yeah, what Circe just said!
Lighten the fuck up!
Submitted by tinactin (user info) at 2005-06-30 19:05:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Eh, Ive got nothing better to do
Submitted by queen_of_the_djel (user info) at 2005-06-30 12:44:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Yes, yes, that's right, men have all the power, we have no control over them.
<Quiet aside to Circe> I like your style, keep it up.
Submitted by kissmyarse (user info) at 2005-06-30 11:23:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hahahah! I kind of like the hairy brutes....but I'm ok with them being caged and only being used for pleasure.
Submitted by DanielH (user info) at 2005-06-30 06:57:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This post splices perfectly with What Men Can't Say: http://www.ubersite.com/m/59387
Well done. +++
Submitted by lucid (user info) at 2005-06-29 17:43:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Ha!
You'll never win the war!!
The planning phase will take centuries the way women like to talk, and by then we'll of created fleshy robots that do dishes and move their hips in the right direction.
Submitted by AlkalineSolo (user info) at 2005-06-29 14:05:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I would be so bold as to say 90% of history's greatest inventors were males. We got us where we are today. You just let us fuck you.
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2005-06-29 08:16:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I don't know whether to laugh at the joke, or consider that i'm reminded of the dual standards apparent in every day life in favour of women, just ripe for abuse.
I choose the latter.
Submitted by Ananda (user info) at 2005-06-28 19:32:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
im a girl and i still got annoyed at this
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-06-28 19:02:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I really hope d-prime was drunk just then. Otherwise, I might have to kill him once we've taken over.
Submitted by matnotharry (user info) at 2005-06-28 18:31:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
It's like Boudicca all over again. w00t
Submitted by Coyote (user info) at 2005-06-28 08:58:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-06-28 08:37:28 (#)
Submitted by Bellebrown (user info) at 2005-06-28 05:48:06 (#)
Ranking: 2
Nice idea Circe, but it turns out I can't be trusted with a power drill, so I'll be sitting this one out in the vain hope that some men will survive to do all the hard work for me.
__________
No, see, that's what people seem to be forgetting. There'll still BE men, lots of them. They'll just be caged unless they're killing spiders or chopping wood or servicing our carnal needs.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
So... let me get this straight. You'll be handing out power drills to men
for the purposes of servicing your carnal needs?
I changed my mind, I want in on this deal!
Submitted by d_prime (user info) at 2005-06-28 08:55:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Male schovenists sucked.
Then feminazis sucks.
Then all this prideful anti-femi-nazi shit sucked.
LETS STOP IT WITH THIS.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2005-06-28 08:41:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Thorpe is teh RoXoR!!!!!!!!!!!
and the score so far...
Thorpe Eleventy - Bitches - nil.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2005-06-28 08:38:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2005-06-28 07:21:46 (#)
Ranking: 2
I'd be cool with this idea if it weren't for the fact that nuclear war would break out every 28 days.
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AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
HHAAHHAHAHAHAAHAHAHHAHAHAAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAHHAHAAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAHAHAHAAHAHHAHHHAAHAHAHHAHAAHAHHAAHHA
AHHAAHHAHAHAAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAAHHAAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAHAHHA
HAR-HARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2005-06-28 08:37:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2005-06-28 07:21:46 (#)
Ranking: 2
I'd be cool with this idea if it weren't for the fact that nuclear war would break out every 28 days.
----------------------------------------------
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
HHAAHHAHAHAHAAHAHAHHAHAHAAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAHHAHAAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAHAHAHAAHAHHAHHHAAHAHAHHAHAAHAHHAAHHA
AHHAAHHAHAHAAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAAHHAAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAHAHHA
HAR-HARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Plus twenty-four gazillion!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111111
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-06-28 08:37:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Bellebrown (user info) at 2005-06-28 05:48:06 (#)
Ranking: 2
Nice idea Circe, but it turns out I can't be trusted with a power drill, so I'll be sitting this one out in the vain hope that some men will survive to do all the hard work for me.
__________
No, see, that's what people seem to be forgetting. There'll still BE men, lots of them. They'll just be caged unless they're killing spiders or chopping wood or servicing our carnal needs.
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2005-06-28 07:21:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'd be cool with this idea if it weren't for the fact that nuclear war would break out every 28 days.
Submitted by Chillax (user info) at 2005-06-28 06:48:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I think the problem is the fact that women can be made to carry on the human race without wanting to. Men generally can't, unless you invest in some drugs.
Submitted by Soley_Trinity (user info) at 2005-06-28 05:55:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Bellebrown (user info) at 2005-06-28 05:48:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Nice idea Circe, but it turns out I can't be trusted with a power drill, so I'll be sitting this one out in the vain hope that some men will survive to do all the hard work for me.
Submitted by Danger_Ranger (user info) at 2005-06-28 05:02:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Okay. I give up. I'm turning myself in. Now - oil me up and ride me like a horse, and breed with me when you want to with your slippery bits.
.... Although I do kind of long for the days when we could just belt you over the head with a club and drag you off to our caves of iniquity..
...good times, good times.......
Submitted by Coyote (user info) at 2005-06-28 04:40:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Nice pic! I have to say, that's a mighty big pussy you've got there.
Linkwhore to my cogent response: http://www.ubersite.com/m/69475
Submitted by A-Daamage (user info) at 2005-06-28 03:57:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Uh huh. And every disagreement would result in every nation on Earth pretending like it likes the other nation in dispute only to give out classified secrets to every other nation about that nation behind its back, all the while keeping a straight face. The planet would dissolve into madness in days. Nothing would ever get solved because a spider would eventually make its way into the UN and there would be no one to get rid of it, so the building would simply be evacuated and quarantined.
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-06-28 03:21:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2005-06-28 02:58:35 (#)
Ranking: -2
Shut the fuck up
_________
Are we having a "me" day, dear?
Rad - I like the quotes. I'm going to brand them onto my husband's ass.
Can we please not ever tell him I said that?
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-06-28 03:06:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I thought these Dworkin quotes were appropriate here.
"Only when manhood is dead - and it will perish when ravaged femininity no longer sustains it - only then will we know what it is to be free."
"A commitment to sexual equality with males is a commitment to becoming the rich instead of the poor, the rapist instead of the raped, the murderer instead of the murdered."
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2005-06-28 02:58:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Shut the fuck up
Submitted by MrWillard (user info) at 2005-06-28 01:35:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
To bad we men own everything.
Submitted by williamson (user info) at 2005-06-27 22:28:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Huzzah!
Submitted by Slovin (user info) at 2005-06-27 19:56:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Actually, the majority of civilization likely arose because men need about 20 minutes between orgasms.
Women's inferior strength and high maintenance made them a necessary burden in the first few thousand years of the species.
Submitted by creep_firebombing (user info) at 2005-06-27 19:45:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Clever.
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2005-06-27 19:38:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Meh, we had our run. I grew up with older sisters and a number of small but protective female friends, so I'm accllimated to a matriarchal society. Have at it.
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-06-27 19:22:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Erm, I mean. Of course this is satire. Anyone who thought otherwise was obviously wrong. Look at how innocently we are all acting, lalalalalala!
NOTHING! You saw NOTHING!
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-06-27 19:21:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Satire? Speak for yourself, dude.
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2005-06-27 19:18:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2005-06-27 12:55:09 (#)
Ranking: 0
Geezus! This is supporting my theory that any females here can't make these satrical posts without getting slammed, but there can be all the 'women are stupid, insane, etc.' and those get rave reviews.
This was satire people, satire!
*************************
Mmmmmm, satire.
Submitted by TheEvilleprechaun (user info) at 2005-06-27 17:53:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
woohoo for matriarchy.
Submitted by AlwaysAnEagle (user info) at 2005-06-27 17:34:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You used the correct plural of penis.
Fuck me.
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-06-27 17:14:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Donkey, we aren't telling you what our *real* battle cry is. If we did, a few of the brighter males might flee when they heard it.
Realistically, though, we'll probably go with Peon's idea, and/or slip heavy sedatives into your dinner that we lovingly prepare one night.
Submitted by DonkeyOnTheEdge (user info) at 2005-06-27 16:23:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
While I don't understand this movement, I respect it, for it has taught me one thing. The battle cry of the opposite sex is not, "NO!" <toe stomp> "NO!" <crotch punch> "NO!" <rape whistle>
Submitted by SiskelandFatboy (user info) at 2005-06-27 16:17:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Professional_Peon (user info) at 2005-06-27 15:16:38 (#)
Ranking: 2
Nah we wouldn't need to come get ya' we can just hide all the remotes, place a cage in the center of town with a mega universal remote and you will come to us! <insert evil laughter here>
-----------------------------------
Umm, I will have to admit this statement would indicate an extremely high level of intelligence.
"Smart is doing nothing and allowing the dumb to make things easy for you."
<<This is where I would give up and volunteer to enter Peon or Circe's cage>>
Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-06-27 16:11:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Put tv/cable, a beer fridge, and a toliet in my cage and the keys to RUN THE WORLD are yours
Submitted by GodLovesALittleLovin (user info) at 2005-06-27 16:10:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Does this mean I don't have to lift boxes of toilets at my job anymore? Do I have to do anything other than make babies and live in a cage? I think we could work something out here...
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-06-27 16:04:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.spacefem.com/militantfeminist/
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-06-27 15:56:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I think the point is that it's in a cage.
Submitted by Draqus (user info) at 2005-06-27 15:48:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Is the irony in the fact that the lion is *male* intentional?
Submitted by jumpinjellyfish (user info) at 2005-06-27 15:40:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"People for a Matriarchal Society (PMS)"
So that's what that stands for!
Submitted by Yams (user info) at 2005-06-27 15:39:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-06-27 12:53:10 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Yams (user info) at 2005-06-27 12:50:03 (#)
Ranking: 0
Again with the "females are superior?" I hope this is a joke. If so, I don't get the humor. Either way, I'll hit this shit with a zero.
____________
Of course it's a joke. Type "women" into the search bar and see the hysterical misogynistic crap that comes up.
This is what they call "balance."
----------------------
OK, here ya go.
Submitted by badassmofo (user info) at 2005-06-27 15:34:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't care if you ladies take over as long as we don't have to listen to you talk more.
(don't hate me I'm just kidding...about the taking over and stuff)
Submitted by Creepy_guy (user info) at 2005-06-27 15:32:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by BuckeyesTHEGAME (user info) at 2005-06-27 12:51:59 (#)
Ranking: 1
OMG! The Lions are trying to overrun the humans!!! We must arm ourselves!
MEN! GRAB YOUR GUNS TO PROTECT THE WOMEN FROM THE THREAT OF THESE LIONS!!!
WOMEN! HIDE! WE WILL PROTECT YOU!!
______________________________________
HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!
Submitted by Avals (user info) at 2005-06-27 15:26:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
What are you talking about, woman? You can't even open the hood without the instructions manual; how do you expect to run the world?
Submitted by Professional_Peon (user info) at 2005-06-27 15:16:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:34:43 (#)
Ranking: 1
You wrote:
Every day our numbers grow. We'll attack at night, when they will not expect it
I suggest you attack during a football game. You can round us up at the local watering hole, strip club, or being a couch potato (stuck in the couch) - with no escape. Just in case you needed a little help rounding us up
------------------
Nah we wouldn't need to come get ya' we can just hide all the remotes, place a cage in the center of town with a mega universal remote and you will come to us! <insert evil laughter here>
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-06-27 15:16:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
We'll give you a nice cage.
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-06-27 15:14:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Jack- HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2005-06-27 15:13:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm not being sexist, by the way. Naked biscuits just taste better.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2005-06-27 15:02:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I imagined you shouting this out loud while in a kitchen, naked and dusted with flour from the biscuits you are baking for me.
Thanks for making my day.
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2005-06-27 15:00:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
oooh Circe you make me feel like a big lioness.
Submitted by SkinnyKenny (user info) at 2005-06-27 14:57:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Such anger! Are you sure you're not a member of the little pink mafia?
Submitted by Herpes (user info) at 2005-06-27 14:55:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
If you were my wife, I'd take you down a peg or two.
Submitted by Sinistral (user info) at 2005-06-27 14:43:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Hell if women were running the world they'd be bombing the hell out of each other every month.
Submitted by Pr0j3ct (user info) at 2005-06-27 14:39:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm not sure it would be so bad to be chained to a wall and given food and sex for procreation.
as long as it's sex and not a sperm-sucking-vacuum thing...
hmmm...make the vacuum a mouth and i say go for it.
chain me up, baby.
Submitted by CookieLass (user info) at 2005-06-27 14:32:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by BuckeyesTHEGAME (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:16:07 (#)
Ranking: 1
Satire my ass! The Lions are attacking!
RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!!!
-----
HA!!!
Submitted by TheSpook (user info) at 2005-06-27 14:31:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
If women ruled the world, the wheel wouldn't even exist.
Submitted by InsoManiac (user info) at 2005-06-27 14:17:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I dont care what you do with us, so long as I still get laid.
You would do a much better job than the tools we currently have running this country right now, at any rate.
Oh, did I mention I still wanna get laid?
Submitted by PokeyPecker (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:58:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm ALL for letting women take over. Put me in a cage, breed with me when you need too, then bring me some food, leave me in peace, and let me nap in the shade.
The sooner the better.
Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:49:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:41:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Ejryuu (user info) at 2005-06-27 12:48:55 (#)
Ranking: 1
Meh, I hope you wrote this on a laptop in the kitchen.
Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:34:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
You wrote:
Every day our numbers grow. We'll attack at night, when they will not expect it
I suggest you attack during a football game. You can round us up at the local watering hole, strip club, or being a couch potato (stuck in the couch) - with no escape. Just in case you needed a little help rounding us up
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:32:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You want some?
Come and get some. I've got an especially big serving for you.
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:31:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
*ahem*
RAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawwwwr
(battlecry)
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:27:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'll ask you what I asked fudgepacker, BOB:
WHAT KIND OF SAMMICH DO YOU WANT TO BE????
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:23:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That's nice.
NOW MAKE ME A SAMMICH!
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:22:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by BuckeyesTHEGAME (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:16:07 (#)
Ranking: 1
Satire my ass! The Lions are attacking!
RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!!!
______________
It's okay! They're only going to eat you if you're christian.
You're not a Christian, are you?
Submitted by MickGinny (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:22:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Careful, Don't get the troops all riled up.
You are all just hanging on by your labia. Do you think we would put up with your shit if you didnt own the most sought after treasure of all time? If it were not for pussy, there would have been a bounty placed on women years ago, it would be bigger than deer season.
Submitted by BuckeyesTHEGAME (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:21:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
**taps on microphone**
Is this thing on? A funny thing happened to me on the way to Ubersite this morning...
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:19:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:15:44 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:14:43 (#)
Ranking: 2
But I like menz!
___________________________
We all do! And you can still have them. Lots of them. Caged like animals and trained to do your bidding.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
*drools*
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:17:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Again, I don't think that anyone much cares. It's just good information to know. And yeah, it's changed a few times in the past, but as far as I know, that's how it stands right now.
THE VAGINA BOUDOIR RIDES AGAIN!
Submitted by BuckeyesTHEGAME (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:16:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Satire my ass! The Lions are attacking!
RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!!!!
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:15:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:14:43 (#)
Ranking: 2
But I like menz!
___________________________
We all do! And you can still have them. Lots of them. Caged like animals and trained to do your bidding.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:14:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I think this should even it out.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:14:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
But I like menz!
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:14:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:14:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:10:42 (#)
Ranking: 2
forensicgirl3, not to be an ass, but every time you rate, it's averaged into your overall rating of the post. So when you rate it with +0s, you drag down the rating. I assume that Circe doesn't care that much, but I'm just letting you know.
------------------
Oh wow, I'm sorry. I didn't know that! I thought that only your first rating actually counted and anything after that was just extra.
My bad!
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:10:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
forensicgirl3, not to be an ass, but every time you rate, it's averaged into your overall rating of the post. So when you rate it with +0s, you drag down the rating. I assume that Circe doesn't care that much, but I'm just letting you know.
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:10:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
or maybe impale.
or worse still, not let you even see it. you all want it. i can tell by the way you all play hard to get.
Submitted by legallady (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:08:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
liked it.
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:08:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:05:24 (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh, so you ARE his #1 fan.
________
Yes. And now I must rinse.
Fudgepacker - of course. What kind of sandwich do you want to be?
Iddy - Club? How about.. tap? Or "wave ineffectually at"?
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:07:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:02:43 (#)
Ranking: 2
No woman, such as yourselves, will ever successfully revolt against the rule of the penile progeny.
Any rebellion will be quashed by cockslingers, such as myself.
We shall quest through long forgotten towns, kicking the dust of the trail from our tired boots. When we arrive, all the Good Cunt's women will curtsey before us, lifting invisible skirts over their jeans, offering us praises of long days and pleasant nights. We will respond with an open handed slap to the face, as not to bruise, and say that you are reading too much of that fucking yankee hack writer.
Then get another beer and go back to watching the game.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Rad just drew the proverbial line in the sand here.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:05:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by fudgepacker (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:01:51 (#)
Ranking: 2
make me a sandwich?
please?
-----------------
That's funny
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:05:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
you should check out some ancient greek history - pre-hellenic history. many of the civilisations around that time were matriarchal and quite brutal. the men changed the rules because they were jack of being ritually sacrificed in painful ways and then eaten raw by the quenn/priestess and her acolytes.
in other words, you had your shot, now get the fuck back in the kitchen, before i do more than jsut club you with my cock.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:05:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh, so you ARE his #1 fan.
Submitted by simple_catalyst (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:05:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i was so hoping that the post would be one word...
"SPOON!"
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:04:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:02:43 (#)
Ranking: 2
No woman, such as yourselves, will ever successfully revolt against the rule of the penile progeny.
Any rebellion will be quashed by cockslingers, such as myself.
We shall quest through long forgotten towns, kicking the dust of the trail from our tired boots. When we arrive, all the Good Cunt's women will curtsey before us, lifting invisible skirts over their jeans, offering us praises of long days and pleasant nights. We will respond with an open handed slap to the face, as not to bruise, and say that you are reading too much of that fucking yankee hack writer.
______________
Hack! He is not a hack! He's a million times the man you are!
And when I take over the world I'm going to chain him to my wall and just.. stare at him.... all day.
Submitted by precision (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:03:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-06-27 12:51:40 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by RaineLark (user info) at 2005-06-27 12:48:01 (#)
Ranking: -2
Men are great...nothing beats dick!
_________
That's simply not true! You can beat it with a golf club, a large rolling pin, salad tongs, the cat, a wooden spoon, a chainsaw.. anything, really. They're not that resilient.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Somebody CLEARLY needs to get laid...that somebody is probably me, but thats not the point.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:03:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
All that because I was inspired to say "cockslinger" in my review.
-2DIE
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:02:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No woman, such as yourselves, will ever successfully revolt against the rule of the penile progeny.
Any rebellion will be quashed by cockslingers, such as myself.
We shall quest through long forgotten towns, kicking the dust of the trail from our tired boots. When we arrive, all the Good Cunt's women will curtsey before us, lifting invisible skirts over their jeans, offering us praises of long days and pleasant nights. We will respond with an open handed slap to the face, as not to bruise, and say that you are reading too much of that fucking yankee hack writer.
Then get another beer and go back to watching the game.
Submitted by fudgepacker (user info) at 2005-06-27 13:01:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
make me a sandwich?
please?
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2005-06-27 12:56:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-06-27 12:53:10 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Yams (user info) at 2005-06-27 12:50:03 (#)
Ranking: 0
Again with the "females are superior?" I hope this is a joke. If so, I don't get the humor. Either way, I'll hit this shit with a zero.
____________
Of course it's a joke. Type "women" into the search bar and see the hysterical misogynistic crap that comes up.
This is what they call "balance."
-------------
yeah, what Circe just said!
Lighten the fuck up!
Submitted by Fartman (user info) at 2005-06-27 12:55:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Nonsense! It's a man's world. Without us, the world would not be the way it is today!
I mean, um, nevermind...
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2005-06-27 12:55:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-06-27 12:53:10 (#)
Ranking: 0
Of course it's a joke. Type "women" into the search bar and see the hysterical misogynistic crap that comes up.
This is what they call "balance."
---------------------
In-fucking-deed.
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2005-06-27 12:55:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Geezus! This is supporting my theory that any females here can't make these satrical posts without getting slammed, but there can be all the 'women are stupid, insane, etc.' and those get rave reviews.
This was satire people, satire!
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-06-27 12:54:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
To arms, ladies!
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-06-27 12:53:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Yams (user info) at 2005-06-27 12:50:03 (#)
Ranking: 0
Again with the "females are superior?" I hope this is a joke. If so, I don't get the humor. Either way, I'll hit this shit with a zero.
____________
Of course it's a joke. Type "women" into the search bar and see the hysterical misogynistic crap that comes up.
This is what they call "balance."
Submitted by RaineLark (user info) at 2005-06-27 12:52:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Okay...sometimes I do have the urge to!
Submitted by BuckeyesTHEGAME (user info) at 2005-06-27 12:51:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
OMG! The Lions are trying to overrun the humans!!! We must arm ourselves!
MEN! GRAB YOUR GUNS TO PROTECT THE WOMEN FROM THE THREAT OF THESE LIONS!!!
WOMEN! HIDE! WE WILL PROTECT YOU!!
Submitted by Berty (user info) at 2005-06-27 12:51:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Yeeaahh well that doesn't sound so bad. The first thing we should swap will be the impetuousness for initiating a relationship. Then I can spend all my free time making myself look pretty and not have to worry my pretty little head about rejection.
I can focus on lonliness instead.
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-06-27 12:51:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by RaineLark (user info) at 2005-06-27 12:48:01 (#)
Ranking: -2
Men are great...nothing beats dick!
_________
That's simply not true! You can beat it with a golf club, a large rolling pin, salad tongs, the cat, a wooden spoon, a chainsaw.. anything, really. They're not that resilient.
Submitted by Stin (user info) at 2005-06-27 12:51:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
RaineLark, nothing beats dick when it's correctly used. Sadly, men don't realise that thinking with it is not the correct application.
Submitted by Yams (user info) at 2005-06-27 12:50:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Again with the "females are superior?" I hope this is a joke. If so, I don't get the humor. Either way, I'll hit this shit with a zero.
Submitted by jgreening (user info) at 2005-06-27 12:48:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You *are* a dominant one, aren't ya?
I know I know, I'm going to hell...
Submitted by Ejryuu (user info) at 2005-06-27 12:48:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Meh, I hope you wrote this on a laptop in the kitchen.
And now for a relevant link whore! WOOOOO!
http://www.ubersite.com/m/67903
Submitted by Obi-wan (user info) at 2005-06-27 12:48:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
when will this take place as i dont want to be there when it happens
Submitted by RaineLark (user info) at 2005-06-27 12:48:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
It takes men and women together to get us where we are today. We have developed so many opportunities and advances through both sexes. Men are great...nothing beats dick!
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2005-06-27 12:47:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hahahahaha! Yes! More of us gals need to let our testosterone take over once in a while!
While I think it's tacky to linkwhore, my last post is a tangent of this.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/69211
Submitted by Deidra (user info) at 2005-06-27 12:46:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Woo!


