Ubersite really just isn't that funny... (2091 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 0.33 on 57 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by <Spooñer> (View user info) at 2005-07-03 15:28:18 EDT
I don't read a whole lot of Ubersite posts. Honestly, if you check my User info, you'll see my reviews, for someone who's been around so long and has posted so many sarticles, are staggeringly low. The reason why? Most Ubersite articles just aren't that funny. Even the "good" authors aren't that funny.
And yes, I'm talking about YOU, specifically.
I'm not saying I'm funnier, I probably suck just as thoroughly, I'm just saying that 99% of the posts Uber considers "good" (+1 or better) are actually pretty lackluster. Honestly, few of them are funny.
Now this is by no means an all-encompassing list, as like I said my lack of dedicated reading prevents me from seeing articles that actually ARE good, but here are the following writers I read consistently:
Habeeb Thomas
That's it! Yeah, hate to break it to you guys, but Habeeb is consistently funnier than all of you. I don't even know if it's intentional! I think I likened it best one time to the guy in your March Madness pool who knows shit about college basketball, but somehow rides fucking Idaho into the Elite Eight. That's Habeeb Thomas, but I don't care, cause it's FUNNY.
And that does mean you, Tom Sorrell! You hitwhore, stop it! You used to be good, then that damn Blink 182 shit happened, and you made the MVA, and all you suddenly cared about was hits. Stop it stop it stop it! I'm not so sure you're even TRYING. You're not horrible by any stretch of means, you're just in this Adam Sandler post-Happy Gilmore slump where you're still putting out stuff that's decent enough, but nowhere near your abilities. And then every so often you put out some shit like "8 Crazy Nights" and it's obvious you're not even putting any effort towards it. -2 me, I don't care, it's true! You're overrated, Tom Sorrell!
Anyway, here's the point I'm trying to make...
I know the funny stuff is out there. It has to be. about 70,000 articles, there has to be more than just a few hilarious posts...
So I want you to help me.
Post the funniest thing you've ever seen on Ubersite (that isn't your own) and I'll read it. I'll review it too. Just for the love of God, show me something FUNNY.
Until then, Dave Barry (http://www.davebarry.com) owns all of you.
User Reviews
Submitted by Doodles (user info) at 2006-05-08 21:29:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Spooner (user info) at 2005-07-07 13:24:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Ok, cool. I believe you Tommy Sorrell. Now let's snuggle.
Submitted by BuckeyesTHEGAME (user info) at 2005-07-07 13:08:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
And that does mean you, Tom Sorrell! You hitwhore, stop it! You used to be good, then that damn Blink 182 shit happened, and you made the MVA, and all you suddenly cared about was hits. Stop it stop it stop it! I'm not so sure you're even TRYING. You're not horrible by any stretch of means, you're just in this Adam Sandler post-Happy Gilmore slump where you're still putting out stuff that's decent enough, but nowhere near your abilities. And then every so often you put out some shit like "8 Crazy Nights" and it's obvious you're not even putting any effort towards it. -2 me, I don't care, it's true! You're overrated, Tom Sorrell!
0---0
Oh my God.
I love you with every ounce of my being. You just GET me and that makes me touch myself...and rub my nipples...and play with my...WHOA! Let's just stop right there.
Anyway, you pretty much summed me up perfectly with the Adam Sandler line. The only thing is, all I care about is NOT hits. Er, wait. That's possibly the worst English I've ever used. I meant to say I care about more than just hits. I've done some things lately that I'm quite proud of. The Receptionist article? Come on man, that's my favorite thing out of everything I've ever written. I don't know, meh. Sometimes I don't try, but oh well. I'm just kind of out of ideas, if that makes any real sense. I keep starting articles and leaving them half-finished on my computer/notepads. I just don't get around to finishing them or I don't like the way something sounds so I delete paragraphs at a time, etc...
Once again, meh. Fuck it.
Submitted by Viciousriffs (user info) at 2005-07-05 00:21:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Hey, look, a pissing contest!
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2005-07-04 19:10:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2005-07-03 20:11:01 (#)
Ranking: 0
To each their own.
Submitted by CookieLass (user info) at 2005-07-04 07:45:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
you trying to tell me THIS shit isn't funny?
http://www.ubersite.com/m/66141
Submitted by Siren (user info) at 2005-07-04 06:55:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Bull.
Shit.
This is my favorite post...
http://www.ubersite.com/m/38823
And I am goddamn mother fucking funny, you piece of crap! Recognize!
http://www.ubersite.com/u/siren
Submitted by thorpe (user info) at 2005-07-04 06:27:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/65663
http://www.ubersite.com/m/61168
My favourite shit posts. I mean, really shit.
Submitted by supadupapupa (user info) at 2005-07-04 02:22:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You can't say this isn't funny
http://www.ubersite.com/m/61822
Submitted by Spuds002 (user info) at 2005-07-04 00:21:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/38880
comic gold
Submitted by DonovanMD (user info) at 2005-07-03 23:26:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"Apparently wearing a pink shirt makes me gay"
http://www.ubersite.com/m/65022
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2005-07-03 22:34:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/65243
And by the way, when people say "This wasn't very good but I don't want to ruin your rating" it makes me wanna smack them in the mouth. Rate it with whatever you want; I'm not some teenage prima donna who thinks everyone should worship my comedic genius.
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2005-07-03 22:25:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
The "Tom" stories are truly some of the funniest stuff on Uber.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/40505
"Dano vs the rock apes of Gibralter" by Scott James is also one of the funniest. AJ linked to it down below.
Submitted by sg11588 (user info) at 2005-07-03 22:07:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I know you said not to post your own stuff, so I won't, but look through my posts. I'm sure you will find more than enough funny shit in there.
Submitted by Spooner (user info) at 2005-07-03 21:44:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I bookmarked all thse pages and will read them sometime I'm not lazy, until then, I finished the one by youarsoghey and it was pretty decent. Almost seemed like one lolng setup for a single punchline, though, but not bad. Lord knows I've done that before.
Submitted by Xcuses (user info) at 2005-07-03 21:13:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I agree that many post now receive good reviews based on the poster, not the material. This allows people to get sloppy because why should I work on anything good, I get +2's anyway.
Everyone seems to want different things from this site. You should figure out what you can get out of it, and leave it at that. If I relied on this site to keep me entertained all day, I'd be screwed. Oh wait...
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2005-07-03 21:12:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Of course, since you posted this, I'm not going to have access to my Favorites list for the next ten days. So you're SOL.
Most of Circe's posts tend to make me laugh. The funny ones, I mean. Like 'The Color of Bitch'. But that's just me.
Submitted by kai070169 (user info) at 2005-07-03 20:40:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
habeeb is stupid, there are very, very few people who can male ANYTHING funny on Uber, unless it's at the expense of another Uberuser's dignity.
My early stuff is SOLID GOLD. But I's all growed up now...
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2005-07-03 20:11:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
To each their own.
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2005-07-03 20:00:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/35379
http://www.ubersite.com/m/41292
Submitted by lordofthedance (user info) at 2005-07-03 19:10:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I concur. However....
http://www.ubersite.com/m/54609
and
http://www.ubersite.com/m/67047
Pure genius.
Submitted by downerSTAIN (user info) at 2005-07-03 19:06:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Anything by CBG. I think he's the only author who's every single post is consistently funny.
The "Killing a Small Child with my Ass" post was the first Ubersite post I ever read, and it's still one of the funniest.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-07-03 19:04:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Dave Barry is one of my literary heroes and I'm offended that you haven't noticed any similarity in my work and his.
I'm also offended that I'm not on your "funny list".
I'm also hungry as all hell and am going out for ribs.
Submitted by RaineLark (user info) at 2005-07-03 18:54:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I know everyone rated my joke poorly, but I still think it's hilarious.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/69425
Submitted by deadSurfer (user info) at 2005-07-03 18:48:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/34256 < Tom vs the crow
Jimbo rules
Submitted by Spooner (user info) at 2005-07-03 18:37:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by joedaddy (user info) at 2005-07-03 18:24:30 (#)
Ranking: -1
Soooooo, you want people sort out all the good stories for you,(it does save considerable
time and effort), so you can cherry pick the un-protected, non-copyrighted one's and
potentially make yourself some $ in the future?
I know.....it's for your own enjoyment.
In either case it sounds like a good plan to me.
---
*GASP*
I've been found out!
Submitted by Spooner (user info) at 2005-07-03 18:36:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Fuck that, and what more, you.
Submitted by Sphagnum (user info) at 2005-07-03 18:26:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Good call. Find them yourself you lazy asswipe.
Submitted by joedaddy (user info) at 2005-07-03 18:24:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Soooooo, you want people sort out all the good stories for you,(it does save considerable
time and effort), so you can cherry pick the un-protected, non-copyrighted one's and
potentially make yourself some $ in the future?
I know.....it's for your own enjoyment.
In either case it sounds like a good plan to me.
Submitted by Stin (user info) at 2005-07-03 18:18:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Sorry dude, it was objective discussion and it just occured to me that it might have come out a little aggressively. It wasn't my intention to tell you to bugger off somewhere else.
:o)
Submitted by Or_ (user info) at 2005-07-03 18:14:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Funniest posts:
http://www.ubersite.com/m/40101
http://www.ubersite.com/m/59718
All-time favorite posts:
http://www.ubersite.com/m/58431
http://www.ubersite.com/m/61316
http://www.ubersite.com/m/53714
Read these, and your faith in ubersite will be restored.
Submitted by Spooner (user info) at 2005-07-03 18:10:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Ok, cool!
Submitted by Stin (user info) at 2005-07-03 17:56:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"If you're talking about the website as a study in human nature and whatnot, no, unfunny posts are not worht less. If you're tlaking about the website as a place to go read funny things, yes, unfunny posts are worth less. Depends how you view the site. Personally, I view it as more humorous than a human nature study."
But that's the point, isn't it? You can't come to Uber and complain that it's getting less funny because it IS a study in human nature. If you want purely funny things, go to a website that's designed only to be funny. B@W, or collegehumor or whatever.
Submitted by Spooner (user info) at 2005-07-03 17:44:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
He's a columnist for the Miami Sun Herald. He's also one of the funniest people on the planet.
Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2005-07-03 17:36:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
never heard of Dave Barry before. who is he?
Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2005-07-03 17:26:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
pff at his best.
Submitted by SPECIALk (user info) at 2005-07-03 17:10:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/44486
http://www.ubersite.com/m/26873
http://www.ubersite.com/m/34694
http://www.ubersite.com/m/22675
http://www.ubersite.com/m/37801
Submitted by Spooner (user info) at 2005-07-03 17:04:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"I'm sorry that I'm an emo bullshit poster not a funny one and I'm not contributing to your personal viewing pleasure, but does that mean that what I write is not somehow "worth" as much as a B@W "hilarious" post?"
If you're talking about the website as a study in human nature and whatnot, no, unfunny posts are not worht less. If you're tlaking about the website as a place to go read funny things, yes, unfunny posts are worth less. Depends how you view the site. Personally, I view it as more humorous than a human nature study.
Submitted by Stin (user info) at 2005-07-03 16:53:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Correct me if I'm wrong, but the point of Uber is not to be exclusively funny, per se. It's a place for people to write humour, fiction, real-life, crap, post pictures, animations, have discussions on politics, life, the universe....
I'm sorry that I'm an emo bullshit poster not a funny one and I'm not contributing to your personal viewing pleasure, but does that mean that what I write is not somehow "worth" as much as a B@W "hilarious" post?
Submitted by maiorano84 (user info) at 2005-07-03 16:50:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
www.boredatwork.com
There are a lot of funny articles there.
Submitted by egadz (user info) at 2005-07-03 16:49:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I agree with Spooner.
We all suck.
With the exception of one or two posts.
Submitted by Caacodaemus (user info) at 2005-07-03 16:17:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
so I wasn't the only one to notice this disturbing trend
Submitted by swamp_donkey (user info) at 2005-07-03 16:15:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Who the fuck cares, really. Some stuff is funny, some stuff isn't. Personally, I don't come here looking for uplifting humor, but sometimes I find it. Usually when I want to read something funny, I read my divorce papers.
Submitted by Spooner (user info) at 2005-07-03 16:08:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Everyone loves Dave Barry.
Submitted by Sassmasterr (user info) at 2005-07-03 16:03:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
...for Dave Barry
Submitted by Pr0j3ct (user info) at 2005-07-03 15:59:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
wow, everyone gets their panties in a bunch when someone says ubersite isn't that funny.
well, spooner, at least you have 2 people on your side.
Submitted by Spooner (user info) at 2005-07-03 15:59:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"Maybe your sense of humor sucks fat fuckin cock, ever think of that??"
Haha! Unlikely. Maybe a large gathering of amateurs and others with no real knowledge of how humor works is unlikely to produce a large amount of funyn material. And believe you me, I include myself in that group.
Submitted by swamp_donkey (user info) at 2005-07-03 15:55:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Spooner (user info) at 2005-07-03 15:36:58 (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by BillsSBChamps (user info) at 2005-07-03 15:32:16 (#)
Ranking: -2
You really come off as a huge douchebag here.
---
I know, but it's still true. Half of these article I read reviews to along the lines of "OMFG That was fucking HILARIOUS!!" I barely crack a smile at. Now GET WITH THE LINKS.
-------------
That's the beauty of this site, it's your OPINION, my opinion, her opinion, his opinion. What's funny to some isn't funny to you, big fuckin deal. Maybe your sense of humor sucks fat fuckin cock, ever think of that??
Submitted by Avals (user info) at 2005-07-03 15:54:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
It's true. Fewer and fewer posts manage to make me laugh out loud these days. I think I've just become jaded, though.
I really wanted to link to one of my posts, but then you went and put that stupid rule of yours in there. There goes a perfect linkwhore opportunity. Oh well, it's not like it was that great anyway.
Submitted by jimthefiend (user info) at 2005-07-03 15:52:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Except that it is.
Submitted by Spooner (user info) at 2005-07-03 15:52:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
re 16 yr olds: I'm already aware of the genius of that post, though honestly it's not the actual post as much as it is the results of it. Though the the actual post actually has a random charm to it.
Wazza camwhores: I enjoyed it.
MJ: What can I say? I love that alter. +2!
heater: I've never been a fan of "look at what crazy shit happened to me!" stories, but this one was all right.
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2005-07-03 15:37:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/44213 (re 16 y/ olds)
http://www.ubersite.com/m/62304 (wazza camwhores)
http://www.ubersite.com/m/67599 (Neverland festivities- all the MJ posts are really funny though)
http://www.ubersite.com/m/67939 (Circe buys a heater)
Submitted by Spooner (user info) at 2005-07-03 15:36:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by BillsSBChamps (user info) at 2005-07-03 15:32:16 (#)
Ranking: -2
You really come off as a huge douchebag here.
---
I know, but it's still true. Half of these article I read reviews to along the lines of "OMFG That was fucking HILARIOUS!!" I barely crack a smile at. Now GET WITH THE LINKS.
Submitted by Supreme_Overlord (user info) at 2005-07-03 15:35:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
The truth hurts.
Submitted by Pr0j3ct (user info) at 2005-07-03 15:32:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I agree.
I give out +2's like crazy, even though they aren't deserved.
I personally think JMG is good.
J-Date made me laugh.
Submitted by BillsSBChamps (user info) at 2005-07-03 15:32:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You really come off as a huge douchebag here.
Submitted by swamp_donkey (user info) at 2005-07-03 15:30:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No.