the giants have phenomenal fourth quarter numbers (695 hits)
Category: SportsRating: -1.4 on 7 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Chinaski (View user info) at 2005-07-12 01:58:00 EDT
So, my semi-drunken rants:
1) Breakfast cereal. In this case, Post's "Honey Bunches of Oats". Mm, oats. Those healthful, bland, whole grain powerhouses of protein and many essential vitamins and minerals. Let's take a look at the front of the Post "Honey Bunches of Oats" box:
"Good source of WHOLE GRAIN".
Oh, nice! Post is a good source of whole grain. That means comfortable, well-formed bowel movements, and a nice-feeling stomach. Now, this is a breakfast cereal, so I expect a prolonged, even, steady feeling of energy and stamina for a few hours, at least until lunch. Great, it looks like Post is delivering. Let's take a gander at the ingredients.
Wow, there's so many little vitamin columns with daily percentages next to them that this box reminds me of a high-quality multivitamin. And upon closer inspection...
Vitamin C: 0%
Calcium: 0%
Copper: 2%
Zinc: 2%
Let me get out my notepad; I need to jot down that a 3/4 cup dry serving contains 2% of my daily Copper and Zinc. That stuff improves my cognitive functions.
Let's see, a 3/4 cup dry serving also includes 6 grams of sugar. Let's assume I eat 1.5 cups, a normal serving (I'd probably actually eat 3 cups, which is what I'm doing right now. Ok, that's 12 grams of sugar. 3 teaspoons. Hmm ,that's not too much. So much for this boring, pointless rant- I had 25 teaspoons of sugar ealier when I drank 2 8 ounce glasses of white grape juice and ate a pastry. And that was just breakfast. Mm, sugar- when you need the uplifting, prolonged, healthy high that refined shit can bring you.
When you're drinking you can hardly bother to give a fuck about finishing a boring, illiterate post.
User Reviews
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2005-07-27 13:29:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
It's funny 'cause you don't have any writing talent whatsoever. You really are a washed-up, never-was has-been alkie prowling around some internet website he found after his once-a-day spank left his tired, wrinkled dong exhausted and jelly-soft for the rest of the morning.
Congratulations, dipshit. You're basically and obviously a complete moron, but unfortunately, you have absolutely no wit, charm, or hell, even intelligence to go with it. Sucks to be you, shit-eater.
And really- take it from all of us. You. Can. Not. Write.
At.
All.
At All.
Period.
Submitted by kai070169 (user info) at 2005-07-12 11:23:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
no friends, eh?
Submitted by Pr0j3ct (user info) at 2005-07-12 05:22:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by joedaddy (user info) at 2005-07-12 02:56:32 (#)
Ranking: -2
I would, take a dump on this......but that would be redundant.
BURRN!
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-07-12 04:11:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
SEEK HELP
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-07-12 03:02:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.alcoholics-anonymous.org/
Submitted by joedaddy (user info) at 2005-07-12 02:56:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I would, take a dump on this......but that would be redundant.
Submitted by kai070169 (user info) at 2005-07-12 02:49:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
-2 DIE
That about sums up this piece of crap...